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Heresy. Chinese food is from Birmingham

As a Malaysian Chinese I agree that authentic Chinese is from Birmingham... Could arguably from London but it's definitely British

Indian food is from Rusholme too

Nah m8, it's from the Balti Triangle in Birmingham too

The curry mile Manchester mandem take great offence to your slur

I see your Manchester and raise you a curry in Bradford. Bone apple mother fuckin tea, mate. Best curry I've had.

Isn't the chicken tikka massala from Glasgow?

In china it was just called "food". so it had to be recreated as "chinese food"

Don't want that foreign muck anyway I prefer proper british food like pizza and indian takeaway

It's only true Chinese if it comes from the Chinousine region of France. Otherwise it's just fizzy chicken

I might be missing something here, but why is Chinese food from Birmingham?

i think it's a reference from the comedy show "Come fly with us" with Taaj Mansoor having a conversation with the immigration officer, but I could be wrong

Used to live in Birmingham; can confirm.

Pizza and Chinese are English food, you get me? https://preview.redd.it/cneafhhzia1c1.jpeg?width=1280&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b3e0a6a0319be9c2553b649db6b5f87e60500417

Come Fly With Me was such a good show haha

All I want to know is what Taaj felt when he finally got to see Avatar 2. Have you seen Avatar 2? If not, you are gay.

We’re not giving them back, fuck off

Pretty sure that's on the letterhead of the British Museum.

Excel file titled "Things We Stole"; counterpart to file "Things We Need To Steal".

●All of Ireland ●America (again)

I don't think they want America anymore.

But we want you! The US MIC hasn’t designed an unsinkable aircraft carrier yet, but there you are… hell it even has a museum on it! Mighty fine addition to the gun collection. Simple as. XD

We shall take you back if you promise to behave this time.

Only if America doesn't come with Americans (except the natives, they can stay)

And Britain was only formed in 1707. A lot of these things are older than Britain.

But in Latin, because they're keeping pillage classy.

The British museum has entered the chat

Can we at least give the Royal Family back?

Fair point. They’re a bit scruffy now, but we should get credit at least. I’ll dig the receipt out

Would France/Germany want them is the question.

That one's wrong. It only works if you think the fact the Queen's great-great-grandfather being German is more important than her mother being Scottish.

So what you’re saying is we need a winner takes all battle royal between Scotland and Germany? I’m here for it

Well, maybe the Nissans and Christianity...

Christianity has been in England longer than the English

Not to mention there are multiple sects referred to as Anglican and the Church of England itself is fairly historically significant

Christianity isn't English, England is Christian.

The king is literally head of the church. Checkmate papists.

I don't want no foreigner running my church!! ...what's that? The Royal Family is German? That's a whole load of bollocks! We all know our great Royal Family's pure English!

So are the English, its okay.

Based

On

Nothing

It's not the native religion, though. It is imported by romans. it's about as native as Islam. Celtic polytheism is the native religion of these islands

What about the religion of the people before the Celts showed up? Or the people before them? Or the people before them? Shouldn't that be the native religion?

The real native British religion is Glaciers

Don't they own Man Utd?

To be fair they are a bunch of melts.

Lol

Eurgh, history didn't just begin around 33,000 years ago, I bet you think football began in 1992 as well.

No 1966

No one knows what the beaky folk worshipped because they didn't write it down, the lazy sods.

It depends on what you mean by “native religion”. Nobody before the Romans (that we know of) got anywhere close to having all of “England” under one religion, so there’s no “*the*” involved. The most useful definition for “native religion” would be “a religion that arose in the area rather than being imported from elsewhere”, so… I think the “native religion” of England would be football, at this point.

That's what I hate about culture gatekeepers that pretend nothing can be British/American/German/whatever just because it didn't originate there. Following this logic we're all African and the only ancestry we need to care about is caveman culture. Just accept that something is part of the modern culture of a country and it constantly changes.

Celtic polytheism was imported by the Celts though, who came from mainland Europe around 1000bc.

I don't know about 'Celtic polytheism', but the tree worship of the druids seems like a very natural religion for these islands.

To be fair so does a religion about a bloke who turns water into wine and hands out free baked goods.

He's like a one man Xmas market

i'm starting to see a market here for greggs to corner

Yeah, just sucks when they strangle you and throw your body into a bog. Then some museum digs you up and puts you on display. [My face when..](https://bollingtonscibar.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/e4390013-reconstructed_face_of_the_lindow_man_bog_body-spl.jpg?w=385)

True druidic settlers did import gods, but polytheism is worship of multiple gods they did not replace native religion. There are some gods that predate celtic gods, but they went largely undocumented. There are artifacts but nothing is known about them.

>they did not replace native religion. So you're agreeing it's not the native religion :P

No, it is native. it's just that long ago before writing, you can not tell what God was imported by celtic druids and what gods were native. it's the first documented religion in these islands thousands of years before Christianity even existed. It's like trying to find out who built stonehenge, but all the gods that we do know about predate Christianity. If you say Christianity is british, so is Islam because all that is different between them regarding Britain is a period of time.

Presumably the Bell Beaker people had a religion before the Celts invaded in approximately 1000bce

Christianity isn't the native religion of the British isles, it also isn't Celtic paganism because there were people here before the Celts. But, in regards to the English, Christianity would be their native faith since most historians would regard the works of Bede as the first mention of England or English-ness as a thing. Islam hardly compares in prescence or historical significance.

Not really true,if you say native is people from an area for a long enough period of time that their culture is intrinsically tied to it and bonus if they have creation myths of that area and mythology based around their people going to that area then so is Old English paganism/mythology and various sects of Christianity that’s tied to the English people/land… Okmatewanker back on,too reyt keep owt foreyn past the year 0 out,nuff said.

https://preview.redd.it/5vahfy0nba1c1.jpeg?width=748&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7f0edab9a8ae933ecd2830f8be82df6a44711212

Nobody remembers poor jutes 😔

anglo-saxons? pick a struggle mate

Who is the mong in the picture?

Your da

Sells Avon

not in norfolk, one group thanks

real

Who is this man and why is he listing the contents of my kitchen?

You must have a big fucking kitchen to fit an Audi in there, are you Gordon Ramsay?

Doesn't everyone just keep a spare Audi next to the cocaine?

Why is the Audi in the cocaine cupboard? Also we’re running low on royal family.

Why is the Royal Family in your kitchen?

Cos the blow's in there.

...and?

And its fucking crisps not chips.

That's why I prefer Pepsi, which is made in the UK. Checkmate

Plus some weed and some K. Utterly bri‘ish!

Same with Fords

He's got a point about McDonalds. That's clearly a Scottish restaurant. It really took off when a Scottish bloke called Campbell shouted out he could murder one after a night on the lash.

u ever think about doing stand up?

That is still British!

Nah it’s jockish, British is anything within 3 miles of my house plus selected successful sportsman and historical military figures I like

Int that English mate?

Thank god ketamine is British

Genuinely this guy is the cringiest cunt alive everyone knows cocaine grows in most English gardens

Is sprinkled on, not sure if it actually grows

my mate dean found some in a box of washing powder once and sold it to me half price. top bloke he is

We stole them all fair and square. That's what makes us British. Just look at the Natural History Museum

The Japanese are pissed that we stole their convenience store for the earthquake exhibit.

British Museum surely?

Not exactly sure what his post is supposed to prove, what his point actually is. Seems a bit fruitless 🙄

Yeah I noticed he missed apples off too.

😂

Oi! Iv gorran apple tree in me gardin, that meks um British!!!

It's the sort of message to be delivered with a smug grin. It has no point other than that the person making it believed that it would make whoever they were talking to feel bad/look stupid. That's all it is.

https://preview.redd.it/oz9hf7uvtb1c1.jpeg?width=620&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0a1d854beb048846264221d9d5514063d205b2ac "Um ackshually..." I bet he does this at least 4 times a day lmao

Send the woke back to Bournemouth where they belong

Bournemouth is a tory cess wot u sayin

That was the joke

Ah worth a go lad

Fackin WOKES send em back to Wiltshire

We don't want them, send them to Glastonbury

we have chosen to decline your generous offer and instead send them to Birmingham (specifically Smethwick)

Next they’ll be sayin stellas not bloody English!!

Yeah but we improved on them! Pizza - We added beans, you're welcome humaity. BMW, Audi - Might not have built the cars but we came up with the idea of driving them like a twat and not using the indicators Beer - We were the first to make drinking 10 pints then destroying the town centre a national sport. I'm am however happy to concede that we had nothing to do with Citroen.

At least chicken tikka masala is British!! Small mercies

Chicken Balti invented in Birmingham.

That's a mix of things that aren't British, are British, and things that nobody ever thought were British.

like who are these people calling bmw british

It's the British Motor Works pal.

Tabs are the most British thing ever. It disgusts me when I see foreigners smoking tabs, it’s cultural appropriation

Things that are 'British' Television Killing Scots Telephone Banning Polish potatoes Theory of Evolution Burning at £20 note in front of a homeless man Newtonian physics & Theory of gravitation Security guards in McDonalds Steam Engine

Morris dancing

Things that are British: British Museum (all other cultures' stuff belongs to it)

Muh globalism

Which is a British invention, check mate

> X-Box Born in 1945 💪

ORANGES ARE BRITISH, THIS IS FENIAN PROPAGANDA CALLING LOYAL ULSTER ORANGEMEN ANYTHING OTHER THAN BRITISH

"So you're telling me, I'm not supposed to claim things that didn't originate in Britain " - the British museum... nervously !!

The royal family a freeloading knobheads and deviants but I don't get the whole "they're German" thing. It's like Americans who say they're Irish because their great grandparents were. Cringeworthy. The current shower of nonces were all born in the UK. And so were their parents, mostly. Not going to call my mate Neeraj "not British" because his parents are from India am I, cause that would make me a fucking racist (and factually incorrect.)

Jokes aside, this guy is either wrong on several fronts or applying a logic that would basically conclude nothing is indigenous to anywhere

Scotland didn't discover heroin, but they damn well own it now

When we do it it’s appropriation When America does it it’s cute FOCKIN COLONIES

My tea is British it says Yorkshire on it you clown.

India was a part of Britain.

Like Poland was a part of Germany.

Of course they’re not British, they’re Bri’ish

Well we gave the world, the missionary position and dogging. Your welcome

YOU WOT 🤬 Chinese chippy is classic British meal thaz why its called Chinese!!!! 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

Ah here gin is English yes it technically comes from the dutch but that’s almost an entirely different drink

I'll accept that a lot of these aren't british but fish and chips??? Now that's a propa english delicacy 😡😡

Things that are British: Led Zeppelin Deep Purple Black Sabbath Judas Priest Motorhead Iron Maiden Angel Witch Tygers of Pang Tang Venom Budgie Saxon Cloven Hoof Witchfinder General Diamond Head Hell Sabbat Blitzkrieg Tank

Don’t forget S Club 7

Oi you mob, CITROEN is on your list - no wonder you lost the bloody Ashes and the Rugby World Cup !!

Why did he waste my time wrting those things down in English rather than the language or their origin. Mikey is just enabling colonisation by naming forrin' stuff in English. Don't he get it?

Ford, you forgot Ford. They're from Murica, one of the many colonies we lost

Lies. They may have originated as something other than British, but they have since been ASSIMILATED

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the fuck am i looking at

fack off https://i.redd.it/qx65os7s6c1c1.gif

Who writes it as X-box, get the fuck out of here!

Chocolate was literally invented in the UK tho

BMW and mini were literally made down the road from my childhood home.

So everything else not on the list is British?

Everyone knows they aren't British, they're English 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🍺💪🏻

Eddie : The entire British empire was built on cups of tea... Soap : Yeah, and look what happened to that. Eddie : ... And if you think I'm going to war without one, mate, you're mistaken.

"Beer" This person doesn't know what they're talking about. It's like saying "Religion" isn't British. Like yeah bitch, which one?

Nothing's more British than a shag on Brighton's nude beach.

If cocaine isn’t British ‘ow come the arceologists found in cocaine residue in our historical building like the ‘ouses of parliment. Fort so libruls.

That’s one hell of a daily schedule.

Anything that is from a white American is technically British.

Modern bananas are actually British as the most common cultivar that is used the world over was cultivated just up the road from me at Chatsworth House by one of the Cavendish’s gardeners

Why because they didn’t originate here? Okay… now apply that logic to every immigrant and tell them how you feel. See you in a bit mate.

Cocaine? I'll be the judge of that

The British invented curry. It is not Indian.

This thread is priceless. Brought a tear to my eye. God save the king!

We wouldn't have needed an empire if we had any spices at home mate

Don't be ridiculous. These things are all extremely British. It is true they weren't invented here, but so what? The bagpipes were invented in mesopotamia, they're still Scottish as fuck.

Things that are British: Football Rugby British Fish and Chips Jellied eel (😋) America Australia New Zealand Canada India Egypt South Africa Israel Palestine France

Falklands 💪

A lot of those are British...

Bro gin kept this country’s young alive for the past 200 years

Notice he didn't put football 💪😎🖕

Just better than Amer

Ica

At least he acknowledges that a kebab is British.

The Royal Family has been in power as long as the “British” have existed.

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Blow-up dolls, originated in Soho.

And bagpipes aren't Scottish, neither is haggis

Chinese food is obviously British

I grow bananas and oranges in my garden. I live next to the Citroen and Xbox plant so these are blatant lies… 👊🏻

do British people really associate McDonalds with their country? it's practically a byword for America

Britain has adapted and redefined all these things into a new cultural paradigm. By this blithering stoat's rationale: maple syrup isn't Canadian, tempura isn't Japanese, Bahn Mi isn't Vietnamese, fried chicken can't be Korean, pasta isn't Italian, the French have no right to wine, potatoes and beer aren't Irish, kilts aren't Scottish, and Mexico straight up doesn't exist. Fucking moron.

nintendo is ok?

Nah, cocaine is British. It was made at the old coke plants in Wales before Maggie shut them down.

Anything can be bri’ish if you just do a bit of cheeky colonisation.

Finally someone called out those German twats

Nanananana we said "claimed" fair and squarzies. Its all ours

Chicken Tikka Masala was invented in Glasgow. The dumb shit.

Nothing more British than a punch in the face for this prick

Don’t trust anyone that writes X-Box

Im sorry cocaine?

Johnathan do you wear shoes?

We did invent the language this person used to complain about us in tho… so.

Is the woke in the room with you now?

That was a blast! Read ALL the comments for a change & with joy… what is British? British Humour that’s what! Thank you fellow Britons… oh hang on…Bri🥴

Nothing is from anywhere if you go back far enough. Sure beer may not originally come from here, but that doesn't mean there aren't any very British beers out there

we stole all of those things fair and square

I don't get why people try to reduce culture to shit you can buy or put in your body. With the exception of christianity and the royal family, this person has just listed a series of consumer products. IMO this shows how much American culture has rotted their brain.

"pizza" was the first thing I read and my brain immediately assumed this was a list of things that go on pizza for some reason Ah yes, Christianity pizza

Is that the lyrics to “We Didn’t Start the Fire”?