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It sounds simple but keep them busy. Is there anything limiting why you can’t take them out? It does seem harder at first, but getting them out of the house for us at least once a day helped to burn out their energy. If not, at least getting them outside to play, maybe with a water table or just anything outdoors. It’s the day we were stuck inside that their behavior was the worst. Being home 24/7 made everyone miserable.
I’m also not against screen time or tv shows at all but cocomelon did have a negative effect on my kids behavior when they watched it. Things like sesame street or beat bugs on Netflix or trash truck also on Netflix was enough to keep their interest but not over the top.
When my twins were that age, they were happiest with a water table plus a big bucket and some small cups. Occasionally we would “wash” the patio furniture. Then I’d let them eat outside before nap time. We live in Southern California so we had to really let them run amok outside before the midday sun drove us inside.
You will be miserable if you keep them in your house. You will need to develop the skills you need to get out with them daily as soon as possible. How do you do that? By doing it. An easy first step is directly from car seat to shopping cart where they can mostly just embarrass you and there isn't much they can do to get hurt. You have to break up your days.
We do go out of the house such as to library story times and gymnastics but lately they will BOLT if I put both of them on the ground. It is very hard to do anything unless they’re in their wagon or stroller. I’ve tried to be as active as possible since they were infants but they’re starting to dislike their stroller and they refuse to stay by me in public spaces.
At this age I identified places that were safe and manageable (eg fenced in parks and playgrounds) and put them in containers (stroller, wagon, carrier, leashes) to go to/from the safe place and it was so much better than staying at home. The abs resisted being in the containers but I'd do it anyway and reinforce that I was doing it because they hadn't shown me they could walk with us consistently and stay safe.
Also the more we were able to practice and reinforce acceptable behavior (staying with us) when we had two plus adults the more quickly they seemed to get what the expectation was in particular as the consequence of not listening/doing something unsafe was to be put in the container.
For context from probably 1yr9mo until 2yr1mo they were just like this; in addition to A TON of practice when we had enough adults they also started preschool which has them walking to/from locations using a walking ring. Now at 2yr3mo I feel comfortable enough with their compliance to take them out without a container alone as long as the place isn't super dangerous or extremely crowded.
It will get better! ♥️🫂
I just use "container" to mean anything that gives you confident control over their motion - could be a stroller, a wagon, a double carrier, leashes, etc.
My boys are the same age. The more you go out and practice listening to directions, the better they will get. My boys hate being contained in strollers/wagons so we hardly ever use them. They have learned if they want to walk and not be in the stroller then they need to listen to mom and follow directions. I make sure to make the rules really clear on the drive to where we are going and then remind them before I get them out of the car seats once we get there. Prepping them is key! I let them know what is expected from their behavior (no bolting, if mom says no or to listen we listen, etc.) and if they cannot follow directions we will leave. They have their moments but overall do really well. Also, we don’t watch cocomelon but I’ve heard it’s very overstimulating. My boys love trash truck and the Thomas cartoon show on Netflix if you want to try switching to that!
It’s truly so much easier for me to be a good parent out of our house. Going to the park, zoo, pool, kid gym, they’re entertained and these places are designed for kids. They come home tired and happy and then suddenly their toys are fun again.
At home I’m constantly having to clean up messes, take away things they can’t have, saving my house from dishevel. At home it’s endless chaos and so much harder not to lose my cool on repeat.
Stay at home mom here to 2.5 year old twins. I just try to keep them as busy as possible and on a schedule. They’re still feral 😂 but manageable. Some ideas for at home - paint (we use crayola washable paint and haven’t had any staining issues), we go on walks in the morning before it gets too hot, we dig in the flower bed, etc. outside of the house - my kids LOVE Lowe’s, Ace hardware, tractor supply, and the grocery store; I also found a really nice enclosed park in the town over from us that we really enjoy. I still have some anxiety when out with them by myself but the more you do it, the more you learn and the easier it gets.
It’s so so so hard, and I agree that being stuck in the house makes it harder.
I’ve gotten more confident taking them “safer” spaces where they can’t bolt in different directions. Grocery store with 2 seats in the cart, walks in a double stroller, story time in a confined room, etc
Single parent here. My twins are almost two so I can relate. Some things I have discovered that help:
1. Exploring playgrounds in my area. I have found a few that are well-suited for them to explore a bit without me having to hover as much. Others are too stressful due to being too crowded, too many ways for them to escape, too much “big kid” equipment, etc.
2. The childcare center at the YMCA. I can drop them off and go work out while they get to play with other toddlers.
3. Indoor play zones or kids museums. The zoo.
4. Leashes and a lightweight portable double umbrella stroller.
5. Putting a ballpit on my back porch and lots of Little Tikes equipment in the backyard. They get lots of energy out that way.
6. Just driving somewhere random and walking around with them in the stroller.
Make homemade playdough. Entertains mine for HOURS. some cookie cutters, few random things to stuff it in from around the kitchen, pure gold.
Play hide and seek. They won't get the full concept but they'll understand enough to have fun with it and want to do it over and over.
March around the house like you're a parade band, everyone gets something to bang together, and practice having them follow commands like loud, quiet, freeze, fast, slow, etc.
Cook something, and expect it to be messy. Have a chair or two they can stand on and take your time. Measure stiff out and have them help you dump it in the bowl, you use the mixer and they take turns putting their hand next to yours. They help pour it in the dish or cupcake tin, have them check the progress in the oven with the oven light, etc.
Doing laundry? Have them carry it to the couch for you from the dryer, one tiny toddler armload at a time. Sit them on the dryer while you load the washer, and explain what the soap is for and how much to use, the type of wash cycle, etc. while you do it. Let them marvel at the water being added and getting sudsy.
Wipe down the walls or baseboards and give them a rag to "help" and direct them to the parts you've already done.
Invite them to help you unload the dishwasher, point to stuff for them to hand you within their reach that they won't break.
Involve them in your chores, it will take longer, but they'll think it's fun and be occupied!
I’ve had the same frustrations about being stuck at home since I don’t feel comfortable going to the park and such alone with my twins. They’re 18 months old and don’t like to follow directions, and also think it’s funny to be chased, so it’s hard taking them places. But a twin mom I’ve been chatting with told me someone in her twin group takes her twins to an empty dog park since they’re fenced off. I haven’t been able to use this tip because summer heat came as soon as I learned about this. I also take my kids to story time at the library and they’ve been enjoying that. You could also looking into indoor playgrounds in your area. If you have a backyard space you could vamp it up with a water table, kiddie pool, balls, etc and make your own little park then save outings for when you have an extra hand. I’ve also started following some pages on Instagram run by moms more creative than I to help come up with different activities we can do inside to break up some of the monotony. Especially when it’s just too hot to go out anywhere.
Gotta get out! I started taking them to parks by myself when they were 18 months. Practice makes perfect. Bring your double stroller if you can so if shit hits the fan you can always put them in and go back to car. You got this.
Honestly, get this book! Hilarious and so helpful. I always recommend this book.
Two under Two: How to Survive and Not Kill Your Husband https://a.co/d/iNxRWVO?tag=wte-community-20
I feel this pain. My boys are about to be three and their older sister (five going on six) is very reliant on screens or people for entertainment. My wife is amazing so I try to give her breaks when I can.
My best advice is to do something for yourself. We have no help at all nearby, so I rarely get to do anything on my own. I take days off work just to tinker or do house projects.
Be real about your mental well being. I started therapy this year but feel no different. I started anti anxiety meds recently but have not felt any difference. Going to keep trying. Probably find a new therapist and try different meds.
We have been trying to do more socializing but just end up chasing the twins around the entire time and never talk to our friends. They always say they will help entertain our kids but never do. We are starting to give up on that.
I also have twin 2 year olds and they are absolutely feral. I feel your pain!!! I cannot stand being at home with them (at least not the full day). I got a burley for my bike and we now bike all over town and they LOVE it. We get to see far more things and many different parks rather than just walking with a stroller. And it’s good exercise! The breeze from biking keeps them cooler than just being in a stroller.
Also we just bought them a massive bounce house that inflates in 30 seconds and it’s the best thing our money has ever bought. Folds up and you can easily take it to relatives houses or friends houses with kids (so all your kids can play and the adults can actually get a word in!!)
https://www.samsclub.com/p/bestway-jump-n-climb-kids-inflatable-mega-bounce/P03021559?xid=bounce-houses_1
Solidarity as this morning I found myself muttering "I understand why some animals eat their babies" 🤣 (twins are 3 next month, plus a 7yo).
However you *need* to get out of the house
Find some safe spaces - there must be some penned in playgrounds you can go to?
I advocate back pack reins if they bolt for walks etc. we develop a routine where by they had to wear their back packs and walk next to me holding hand / pram. If they ran off (couldn't get far obviously as on reins) they would then go in the pram. We practised "go" and "stop" at home and then in garden, then on our own safer street and now they will walk with me / ahead but stop when I ask and always come to hold my hand near a road.
It gets easier, but honestly spending as much time out of the house as possible.
There are some places I don't go alone - like obviously swimming or the beach as they often both stoll get tired and Wil lwant to be picked up and I can't carry two three yr olds across sand with changes of clothes etc.
Start small and work your way up, your confidence will lgrow but honestly eventually you'll have to take them out more . Good luck!
Ours seems to only want to go out now.
Finding places that can keep them contained is key.
Parks that are gated, softplays that are just one big room.
Places that you can keep your eyes on both when they go in different directions.
I feel so much for you! My twin boys are 14 now, but they were the wildest versions of toddler boys I’ve ever encountered. I laugh about it now but had many breakdowns when I was in the throes of it! I don’t have many suggestions for you that others haven’t mentioned, but I can completely sympathize with you that “just take them outside” is so much easier said than done - especially with one adult.
The biggest help for me was a second adult. Sometimes my sister. Maybe a friend. Even an older child can be roped into minimally helping chase after the kid who is trying to escape. To this day, if I see a poor soul struggling to contain multiple kids, I will ask if I can help them lol! It’s utter madness once they are really mobile!
Other than that, schedules do help. A designated “play room” space that is fenced off at home was helpful for me. Tv and tablets helped me survive so I will never relate to the tv free households. Someone else suggested YMCA and I will second that. They have childcare options. Swimming pools/splash pads were also a winner for my boys. Our local YMCA has a great water park and these are super affordable for families. Sometimes just loading them in the car and driving somewhere was sort of entertainment in itself.
You will get through this stage! It’s not just you. It truly is insane! But you will make it! Good luck!
This isn’t true for all kids, but as my kids’ language blossomed after 2 they got a lot better at listening.
So when you say something like, “you can choose to ride in the stroller or you can choose to have me put you in the stroller, which do you choose?” they understand and get in the stroller. ETA - I messed up this example. It should read something like “you can choose to ride in the stroller or you can choose to walk and hold my hand,” or “you can choose to climb into the stroller yourself or you can choose to have mama put you in the stroller.”
For the time being, figure out some safe places to take them where it’s okay if they bolt - okay as in “not fatal” - like a park with flat trails (this was my go to at that age - only two directions to run, so fairly well contained), or the zoo (where, if they bolt, you can chase/catch them without them getting hit by a car), or an indoor play park (also a nice go to when it’s too hot or too wet to go outside - my favorite was a few mornings a week at a local community center gym - it had only one door!).
Also - I bribe my kids with food all the time, e.g. “anyone who gets RIGHT in their car seat as soon as we get in the car gets some dried mango!” I realize this is not ideal, but my yelling is also not ideal.
To add - I also spend a lot of time feeling like I don’t know how I’m going to survive toddlers (mine are 2.5)! Something that has helped recently is the podcast “Play Therapy Parenting,” which so far is the only parenting resource that has actually had excellent practical tips *and* hasn’t made me feel like a terrible failure of a parent.
ETA other ideas for entertaining toddlers without losing your mind:
- Empty tennis courts and balance bikes; as they get older empty skate parks work great too
- Squigz toys - stick them all over the house and have your kids hunt for them and collect them - mine would drop them on the floor, and I’d pick those up and stick them in new places. Still entertaining!
- Homemade play-dough (I don’t actually recommend making it with them?) with cookie cutters, toy dinosaurs (Dino tracks!), rollers, play dough scissors
- Water table, scoops, buckets, hose
- Other people’s toddler-proof houses (new toys to play with!) / having other toddlers over to wreck your house
- Having “emergency toys” - new/novel things (anything, really, from a thrift store or buy nothing, as long as there’s two…) to pull out when you can’t go outside and you’re truly going to lose your mind. Or rotating bins of toys so it’s always novel.
- “Exciting” things in your neighborhood to go check occasionally (eg motivate them for a stroller walk). We have a neighbor’s plum tree that we have been checking on.
I shared that I do take them out myself in comments above. I can take them out with a stroller or wagon but if they’re out of the stroller or wagon then they bolt. Lately, they do not like being strapped in or in a cart even.
Same. Following for advice. It was easier to take them by myself a few months ago (they’re 20 months) because they weren’t as fast, now they run so fast it’s so challenging to go out with them by myself. But they’re still too young to actually listen to me. I’m mad because I want to be able to do fun normal things with them but some things I just can’t. I keep telling myself they won’t remember these days anyways.
One thing that’s helped is we have a nice YMCA I can take them, work out, they get the daycare experience for an hour or so which has been great for socialization.
I feel like lots of twin moms choose not to stay at home with them but how the heck do they afford childcare for twins??
**COMMENTING GUIDELINES** All commenters are encouraged to familiarize themselves with the parentsofmultiples [subreddit rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/parentsofmultiples/about/rules) prior to commenting. If you find any comments/submissions in violation of subreddit/reddit rules, please use the report function to bring it to the mod teams attention. **Please do not request or give medical advice or directions in your comments.** Any comments that that could be construed as medical advice, or any comments containing what is determined to be medical disinformation, will be removed. Please try to avoid posting links to Amazon product listings or google/g.co product listing pages - reddit automatically removes comments containing them as an anti-spam measure. If sharing information about a product, instead please try to link directly to the manufacturers product pages. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/parentsofmultiples) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It sounds simple but keep them busy. Is there anything limiting why you can’t take them out? It does seem harder at first, but getting them out of the house for us at least once a day helped to burn out their energy. If not, at least getting them outside to play, maybe with a water table or just anything outdoors. It’s the day we were stuck inside that their behavior was the worst. Being home 24/7 made everyone miserable. I’m also not against screen time or tv shows at all but cocomelon did have a negative effect on my kids behavior when they watched it. Things like sesame street or beat bugs on Netflix or trash truck also on Netflix was enough to keep their interest but not over the top.
When my twins were that age, they were happiest with a water table plus a big bucket and some small cups. Occasionally we would “wash” the patio furniture. Then I’d let them eat outside before nap time. We live in Southern California so we had to really let them run amok outside before the midday sun drove us inside.
You will be miserable if you keep them in your house. You will need to develop the skills you need to get out with them daily as soon as possible. How do you do that? By doing it. An easy first step is directly from car seat to shopping cart where they can mostly just embarrass you and there isn't much they can do to get hurt. You have to break up your days.
We do go out of the house such as to library story times and gymnastics but lately they will BOLT if I put both of them on the ground. It is very hard to do anything unless they’re in their wagon or stroller. I’ve tried to be as active as possible since they were infants but they’re starting to dislike their stroller and they refuse to stay by me in public spaces.
At this age I identified places that were safe and manageable (eg fenced in parks and playgrounds) and put them in containers (stroller, wagon, carrier, leashes) to go to/from the safe place and it was so much better than staying at home. The abs resisted being in the containers but I'd do it anyway and reinforce that I was doing it because they hadn't shown me they could walk with us consistently and stay safe. Also the more we were able to practice and reinforce acceptable behavior (staying with us) when we had two plus adults the more quickly they seemed to get what the expectation was in particular as the consequence of not listening/doing something unsafe was to be put in the container. For context from probably 1yr9mo until 2yr1mo they were just like this; in addition to A TON of practice when we had enough adults they also started preschool which has them walking to/from locations using a walking ring. Now at 2yr3mo I feel comfortable enough with their compliance to take them out without a container alone as long as the place isn't super dangerous or extremely crowded. It will get better! ♥️🫂
What is the container? Is it like a stroller? FTM here with twins and due in December.
I just use "container" to mean anything that gives you confident control over their motion - could be a stroller, a wagon, a double carrier, leashes, etc.
My boys are the same age. The more you go out and practice listening to directions, the better they will get. My boys hate being contained in strollers/wagons so we hardly ever use them. They have learned if they want to walk and not be in the stroller then they need to listen to mom and follow directions. I make sure to make the rules really clear on the drive to where we are going and then remind them before I get them out of the car seats once we get there. Prepping them is key! I let them know what is expected from their behavior (no bolting, if mom says no or to listen we listen, etc.) and if they cannot follow directions we will leave. They have their moments but overall do really well. Also, we don’t watch cocomelon but I’ve heard it’s very overstimulating. My boys love trash truck and the Thomas cartoon show on Netflix if you want to try switching to that!
Backpack leashes are a lifesaver.
It’s truly so much easier for me to be a good parent out of our house. Going to the park, zoo, pool, kid gym, they’re entertained and these places are designed for kids. They come home tired and happy and then suddenly their toys are fun again. At home I’m constantly having to clean up messes, take away things they can’t have, saving my house from dishevel. At home it’s endless chaos and so much harder not to lose my cool on repeat.
Pool? How old are they that you can take them to the pool by yourself?
Stay at home mom here to 2.5 year old twins. I just try to keep them as busy as possible and on a schedule. They’re still feral 😂 but manageable. Some ideas for at home - paint (we use crayola washable paint and haven’t had any staining issues), we go on walks in the morning before it gets too hot, we dig in the flower bed, etc. outside of the house - my kids LOVE Lowe’s, Ace hardware, tractor supply, and the grocery store; I also found a really nice enclosed park in the town over from us that we really enjoy. I still have some anxiety when out with them by myself but the more you do it, the more you learn and the easier it gets.
It’s so so so hard, and I agree that being stuck in the house makes it harder. I’ve gotten more confident taking them “safer” spaces where they can’t bolt in different directions. Grocery store with 2 seats in the cart, walks in a double stroller, story time in a confined room, etc
Single parent here. My twins are almost two so I can relate. Some things I have discovered that help: 1. Exploring playgrounds in my area. I have found a few that are well-suited for them to explore a bit without me having to hover as much. Others are too stressful due to being too crowded, too many ways for them to escape, too much “big kid” equipment, etc. 2. The childcare center at the YMCA. I can drop them off and go work out while they get to play with other toddlers. 3. Indoor play zones or kids museums. The zoo. 4. Leashes and a lightweight portable double umbrella stroller. 5. Putting a ballpit on my back porch and lots of Little Tikes equipment in the backyard. They get lots of energy out that way. 6. Just driving somewhere random and walking around with them in the stroller.
Switch to (free) PBS Kids. Daniel Tiger is wonderful for that age.
Make homemade playdough. Entertains mine for HOURS. some cookie cutters, few random things to stuff it in from around the kitchen, pure gold. Play hide and seek. They won't get the full concept but they'll understand enough to have fun with it and want to do it over and over. March around the house like you're a parade band, everyone gets something to bang together, and practice having them follow commands like loud, quiet, freeze, fast, slow, etc. Cook something, and expect it to be messy. Have a chair or two they can stand on and take your time. Measure stiff out and have them help you dump it in the bowl, you use the mixer and they take turns putting their hand next to yours. They help pour it in the dish or cupcake tin, have them check the progress in the oven with the oven light, etc. Doing laundry? Have them carry it to the couch for you from the dryer, one tiny toddler armload at a time. Sit them on the dryer while you load the washer, and explain what the soap is for and how much to use, the type of wash cycle, etc. while you do it. Let them marvel at the water being added and getting sudsy. Wipe down the walls or baseboards and give them a rag to "help" and direct them to the parts you've already done. Invite them to help you unload the dishwasher, point to stuff for them to hand you within their reach that they won't break. Involve them in your chores, it will take longer, but they'll think it's fun and be occupied!
I’ve had the same frustrations about being stuck at home since I don’t feel comfortable going to the park and such alone with my twins. They’re 18 months old and don’t like to follow directions, and also think it’s funny to be chased, so it’s hard taking them places. But a twin mom I’ve been chatting with told me someone in her twin group takes her twins to an empty dog park since they’re fenced off. I haven’t been able to use this tip because summer heat came as soon as I learned about this. I also take my kids to story time at the library and they’ve been enjoying that. You could also looking into indoor playgrounds in your area. If you have a backyard space you could vamp it up with a water table, kiddie pool, balls, etc and make your own little park then save outings for when you have an extra hand. I’ve also started following some pages on Instagram run by moms more creative than I to help come up with different activities we can do inside to break up some of the monotony. Especially when it’s just too hot to go out anywhere.
Gotta get out! I started taking them to parks by myself when they were 18 months. Practice makes perfect. Bring your double stroller if you can so if shit hits the fan you can always put them in and go back to car. You got this.
Leash them together when you go out so you’re only chasing one moving target
Honestly, get this book! Hilarious and so helpful. I always recommend this book. Two under Two: How to Survive and Not Kill Your Husband https://a.co/d/iNxRWVO?tag=wte-community-20
I feel this pain. My boys are about to be three and their older sister (five going on six) is very reliant on screens or people for entertainment. My wife is amazing so I try to give her breaks when I can. My best advice is to do something for yourself. We have no help at all nearby, so I rarely get to do anything on my own. I take days off work just to tinker or do house projects. Be real about your mental well being. I started therapy this year but feel no different. I started anti anxiety meds recently but have not felt any difference. Going to keep trying. Probably find a new therapist and try different meds. We have been trying to do more socializing but just end up chasing the twins around the entire time and never talk to our friends. They always say they will help entertain our kids but never do. We are starting to give up on that.
Sounds exactly like us 💀 it’s quite the phase of life isn’t it?
I also have twin 2 year olds and they are absolutely feral. I feel your pain!!! I cannot stand being at home with them (at least not the full day). I got a burley for my bike and we now bike all over town and they LOVE it. We get to see far more things and many different parks rather than just walking with a stroller. And it’s good exercise! The breeze from biking keeps them cooler than just being in a stroller. Also we just bought them a massive bounce house that inflates in 30 seconds and it’s the best thing our money has ever bought. Folds up and you can easily take it to relatives houses or friends houses with kids (so all your kids can play and the adults can actually get a word in!!) https://www.samsclub.com/p/bestway-jump-n-climb-kids-inflatable-mega-bounce/P03021559?xid=bounce-houses_1
Find fenced in parks, or invest in toddler leashes. Not kidding. Get a harness and start taking long walks with them.
Solidarity as this morning I found myself muttering "I understand why some animals eat their babies" 🤣 (twins are 3 next month, plus a 7yo). However you *need* to get out of the house Find some safe spaces - there must be some penned in playgrounds you can go to? I advocate back pack reins if they bolt for walks etc. we develop a routine where by they had to wear their back packs and walk next to me holding hand / pram. If they ran off (couldn't get far obviously as on reins) they would then go in the pram. We practised "go" and "stop" at home and then in garden, then on our own safer street and now they will walk with me / ahead but stop when I ask and always come to hold my hand near a road. It gets easier, but honestly spending as much time out of the house as possible. There are some places I don't go alone - like obviously swimming or the beach as they often both stoll get tired and Wil lwant to be picked up and I can't carry two three yr olds across sand with changes of clothes etc. Start small and work your way up, your confidence will lgrow but honestly eventually you'll have to take them out more . Good luck!
Ours seems to only want to go out now. Finding places that can keep them contained is key. Parks that are gated, softplays that are just one big room. Places that you can keep your eyes on both when they go in different directions.
I feel so much for you! My twin boys are 14 now, but they were the wildest versions of toddler boys I’ve ever encountered. I laugh about it now but had many breakdowns when I was in the throes of it! I don’t have many suggestions for you that others haven’t mentioned, but I can completely sympathize with you that “just take them outside” is so much easier said than done - especially with one adult. The biggest help for me was a second adult. Sometimes my sister. Maybe a friend. Even an older child can be roped into minimally helping chase after the kid who is trying to escape. To this day, if I see a poor soul struggling to contain multiple kids, I will ask if I can help them lol! It’s utter madness once they are really mobile! Other than that, schedules do help. A designated “play room” space that is fenced off at home was helpful for me. Tv and tablets helped me survive so I will never relate to the tv free households. Someone else suggested YMCA and I will second that. They have childcare options. Swimming pools/splash pads were also a winner for my boys. Our local YMCA has a great water park and these are super affordable for families. Sometimes just loading them in the car and driving somewhere was sort of entertainment in itself. You will get through this stage! It’s not just you. It truly is insane! But you will make it! Good luck!
I feel like you are living my life right now.
Take them to fenced playgrounds, either indoors (shopping centres?) or outdoors.
This isn’t true for all kids, but as my kids’ language blossomed after 2 they got a lot better at listening. So when you say something like, “you can choose to ride in the stroller or you can choose to have me put you in the stroller, which do you choose?” they understand and get in the stroller. ETA - I messed up this example. It should read something like “you can choose to ride in the stroller or you can choose to walk and hold my hand,” or “you can choose to climb into the stroller yourself or you can choose to have mama put you in the stroller.” For the time being, figure out some safe places to take them where it’s okay if they bolt - okay as in “not fatal” - like a park with flat trails (this was my go to at that age - only two directions to run, so fairly well contained), or the zoo (where, if they bolt, you can chase/catch them without them getting hit by a car), or an indoor play park (also a nice go to when it’s too hot or too wet to go outside - my favorite was a few mornings a week at a local community center gym - it had only one door!). Also - I bribe my kids with food all the time, e.g. “anyone who gets RIGHT in their car seat as soon as we get in the car gets some dried mango!” I realize this is not ideal, but my yelling is also not ideal.
To add - I also spend a lot of time feeling like I don’t know how I’m going to survive toddlers (mine are 2.5)! Something that has helped recently is the podcast “Play Therapy Parenting,” which so far is the only parenting resource that has actually had excellent practical tips *and* hasn’t made me feel like a terrible failure of a parent. ETA other ideas for entertaining toddlers without losing your mind: - Empty tennis courts and balance bikes; as they get older empty skate parks work great too - Squigz toys - stick them all over the house and have your kids hunt for them and collect them - mine would drop them on the floor, and I’d pick those up and stick them in new places. Still entertaining! - Homemade play-dough (I don’t actually recommend making it with them?) with cookie cutters, toy dinosaurs (Dino tracks!), rollers, play dough scissors - Water table, scoops, buckets, hose - Other people’s toddler-proof houses (new toys to play with!) / having other toddlers over to wreck your house - Having “emergency toys” - new/novel things (anything, really, from a thrift store or buy nothing, as long as there’s two…) to pull out when you can’t go outside and you’re truly going to lose your mind. Or rotating bins of toys so it’s always novel. - “Exciting” things in your neighborhood to go check occasionally (eg motivate them for a stroller walk). We have a neighbor’s plum tree that we have been checking on.
Why can’t you take them out yourself?
I shared that I do take them out myself in comments above. I can take them out with a stroller or wagon but if they’re out of the stroller or wagon then they bolt. Lately, they do not like being strapped in or in a cart even.
Same. Following for advice. It was easier to take them by myself a few months ago (they’re 20 months) because they weren’t as fast, now they run so fast it’s so challenging to go out with them by myself. But they’re still too young to actually listen to me. I’m mad because I want to be able to do fun normal things with them but some things I just can’t. I keep telling myself they won’t remember these days anyways. One thing that’s helped is we have a nice YMCA I can take them, work out, they get the daycare experience for an hour or so which has been great for socialization. I feel like lots of twin moms choose not to stay at home with them but how the heck do they afford childcare for twins??