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The amount of tears I have shed over this post. I'm not in a position to foster children, but I am so, sooo grateful for people like you and your wife! There's so many terrible people in the system, every wonderful family like yours keeps a child out of the hands of abusers and predators. Thank you so much for the update! Wishing all the happiness for your family 💓
I was more steely eyed and clenched jaw trying to get thru the update post until the part where she asked to call him dad. Then the flood gates opened. I wish OP and his family all the best!
I was literally about to say that! I held my resolve right up to can I call you dad? And bye dad love you. Man its incredibly dusty in here lol
I wish this family all the love in the world
Forreal. Both of my parents were adopted so it's something I have always felt strongly about. This is beautiful.
So glad you're giving this girl a new chance at life! You're amazing people.
I've been following since the first post too, and am filled with joy for this amazing young lady, and for all of the wonderful, supportive, and loving, members of her new family.
There's one thing I wanted to mention though, @finpinnn.
I know a LOT of people take Reddit stories and make videos about them on places like TikTok and Instagram. I have no idea if it could jeopardize your adoption if your amazing story goes viral, but I thought I would mention it.
It's an incredible story, and I know a lot of innocent Reddit people have had their lives turned upside down because someone stole their posts and made videos about them in order to get paid, often changing the actual details to make them even more lurid and sensational.
I know you've previously mentioned her SA, and unwanted photos, and I would just hate to see unscrupulous people use those details to profit from your story, and of course there's also the possibility that if that happens it could get back to people in your daughters life, such as classmates.
Kids can be really cruel at this age. Not sure if you're allowed to speak vaguely in public about her situation either, but you all deserve to live your new lives together in happiness and peace, so if it were me I'd delete both posts and edit them to leave a thank you message in its place.
This is in no way a critique, in a perfect world you wouldn't have to worry about crappy people stealing your amazing experience as a family to use for their own selfish reasons, but unfortunately that's just not the way it works anymore.
I was r*ped as a child, and long before the internet was a thing, and years later in high school someone found out what happened when I was 11, and the cruelty I experienced from my classmates still sticks with me 39 years later, so please understand that I'm saying all of the above with love, and a desire to make sure your incredible daughter doesn't have to deal with someone splashing her story all of the internet, or risk dealing with an unhappy judge, or social worker, because some jerk online was able to follow the breadcrumb trail back to her new identity.
You all deserve to live your happy lives together in peace, and some people won't respect your privacy, that's all I'm saying.
Wishing all of you many, many, happy years, together as a family.
Take care. 💙
Thank you for your kind words, I really appreciate it so much. 💙
The one thing that hasn't changed since I was in high school is that kids can be really cruel to each other sometimes, and now a rumor can spread like wildfire within minutes online.
I can't tell you how grateful I am that the internet didn't exist when I was still in high school, but I saw how quickly things can spread online, and ruin lives, when my boys were still young.
It's sad that the Reddit community has to worry about things like this now, but I felt compelled to say something in case he didn't know that these kinds of things are happening very often now unfortunately.
Ninja onion cutters, have been sneaking around spreading cut onions around people reading this post.
Seriously, congrats OP, I hope everything in your girls future goes well. (Also love that you refer to her as our girl) ❤️
Don't get how he kept it together when she asked to call him dad. I'm always half way to full on ugly crying whenever I read a kid saying that, I can't imagine what it feels like when you're the parent.
At her age I was just not expecting her to want to change how she refered to us and I fully respected that. It was the initial shock I think. Trust me, I did ugly cry after I dropped her off though.
Seriously! I can’t stop crying over this post. My heart goes out to his daughter for going through something so traumatic, and I’m happy she’s now part of such a loving family. 💜
Seriously!! I am crying so much right now. OP you and your wife and your boys.. and apparently your parents and siblings in law.. you’re all saints. I am so happy for you. Life is tough. I wish I knew you so I could watch this sweet girl grow up.
My husband and I would like to adopt someday, and this post just makes me feel so much stronger about that.
Congrats on your new daughter! You have navigated this difficult situation with wisdom. Uou seem like really good people and I wish your family all the best.
Eff the IL's. I don't know if it's a generational thing, but my goodness, what is with the boomer generation and the whole and entire lack of anything that resembles empathy?!
That poor child has CLEARLY been through something so bloody horrific, at what sounds like an exceptionally young age if she's a mid-teen now, and the ONLY thing the FIL could focus on was discussing her like she was an object to be vilified.
Also OP, if you ever read this comment, just as an FYI from someone who grew up around religious zealots, YOU and your wife and sons are demonstrating FAR more religious piety than your FIL has in a life time.
Absolutely! OP-- you and your wife are a national treasure. You're such wonderful, loving people. Fortunately in your family, those apples(your children) haven't rolled an inch; they're as close to the tree as possible.
Continued best wishes. God bless!
As I sit here with teary eyes, feel necessary to say the lack of empathy ISN’T generational. Please don’t lump all Boomers into this FIL/MIL twisted thinking.
To make this statement even broader, please don't lump all into . Negative stereotypes are mean for obvious reasons, and positive stereotypes make people feel lesser when they don't align with them. Stereotyping is bad.
Good lord I’m crying at my desk. This is so beautiful and I’m so glad that little girl is getting a real family.
I don’t trust that FIL one bit. I don’t care how many electronics he gave up, I’d never trust him again. The top rated comment on the original post said it all - the fact that FIL doesn’t see this little girl as a victim, says something about him and his lack of morals regarding age and consent. He should not be trusted around children.
The things he said sound too much like he has been browsing cp. He absolutely thinks the children are the ones in the wrong for being abused. Disgusting.
Those electronics need to be checked out by a professional. I don't CARE if the police department takes seven months to return them to FIL. There may be hidden folders, partitioned drives, and a million other ways to hide incriminating evidence. I'd hand them over period so they can look through the machines and see what is on there. If you can't legally give them to the police due to chain-of-evidence and such, you CAN take them to an electronics expert. Tell them what you expect and fear to find and to search them all carefully. They can call the cops if they find something as part of their own jobs.
Oh, not one of us is smart enough with computers or anything tech to take this on ourselves. I won't go in to too much details, but it is 100% being done by professionals.
No matter what they find or don't find on those electronics, he absolutely should not be trusted around children if he's going to say hideous things to and about them. That on its own is enough to warrant complete loss of trust.
I agree 100%. I will admit I didn't see the bigger picture right away because I was caught up in his disgusting opinion of someone, a child, who I love so dearly. And I do have the tendency to think I am overreacting and I always try to see other peoples perspective, so I needed time to wrap my head around this situation. Obviously keeping the children away from these people, just in case, until I was thinking clearly again. It sounds stupid now, I get that. But yes, there is just no way things can get even partially back on track from here with these people.
Agreed. Everything I hear about the craftier types of people who have CSAM is that they are in the absolute last places anyone could ever think of looking. Like stuff like a whole other hard drive sitting in a computer that just looks like any other part of the computer until a wire is shifted (think I saw something like that on Reddit within the last year. I think someone bought a thrifted PC or something like that?), or a flash drive in a hollowed out book somewhere, etc. any obvious electronic devices would be the place I'd least expect CSAM to actually be on
Never in an update (read the first post before the update) have I ever gone from seething anger to balling my eyes out in pure joy. You are good people and we need more people like you and your wife.
Never in my life have I been this chocked, angry, dissappointed and sad while my heart is so filled with love and happiness. It's safe to say my head is all over the place these days. Thank you so much!
Not going to lie, needed this update lol
Best of luck, homie. You sound like a great dad and am so happy this poor girl gets a shot at a real and happy life!
When the adoption is official. Yall need a "it's a girl" sign placed outside.
A "baby shower" would also be great to have.
I'm so happy for your family.
As for your FIL, I hope he feels embarrassed and ashamed for being investigated by the fbi.
Make a registry for her at Target and Barnes & Noble, and tell friends and family how to donate money to her college fund.
This is as close to a fairytale ending as it’s possible to have in the hellscape that is the modern world.
OP, you and your wife have done a great job raising your sons, and I’m willing to bet that’s one of the reasons your daughter fits in so well with your family.
Congrats on your new addition, and please let us know when it’s official so we can all celebrate with you!
I hadn’t read the first post, so I went back and read the whole thing. What a roller coaster of emotions ending on a great note. Continue being an excellent dad. All the best to your family.
>She was truly alone in this world when she came to us. She is now in the process of gaining a sh\*t ton of family that she never had before. That's a lot to take in as a teenager. Our intent is to guide and help her as much as we can in her relationship with everyone in our family, but to do that, we need to know what kind of relationship our family is ready to have with her.
This made me cry. You are wonderful parents. Congratulations on gaining a daughter!
I apologize in advance if my comment seems jumbled. My thoughts about this situation are all over the place.
The fact that your family found your daughter and has helped her so much has me so hopeful for other kids.
See, I was a child who had been SA'd, no idea for how long because I was VERY young at the time and my memories of it are fuzzy and uncomfortable. My abuser (well the first) was my father. It took me a long time to get to a place where I could even admit that to anyone. I knew that what he had done was wrong, but I internalized it so much that somehow I felt I was the bad one.
I have NEVER had the feeling that anyone loves me. No one has ever cared enough about me to want to help me get better. All of the work I have done to get through this has been up to me.
I am so glad she has you guys. She has parents who love her and want her to be the best version of herself. Brothers who she can joke with and be a teenager around. Family that loves her for who she is, and allows her space to feel. Keep up the great work. People like me, need to know that people like you exist and are helping the kids like me.
Your daughter has a chance now. She can feel like a real person. She deserves that and so much more.
Hey Happy District. I am confident that I speak for almost everyone here when I say this: we care about you getting better. We love you enough to be invested, to want to help, to just in general be of support. I am 100% certain that there are literally thousands of people who agree with me. You are an absolute rock star, and you will continue to slay dragons. You are never ever alone.
OMG, I cried reading this, mostly happy tears. I wish you and your family all the best for your future! You all sound like amazing, loving people! Please update us on when the adoption is official. Hugs, love, prayers, positive vibes/thoughts, whatever you & your family need is being sent your way! 🩵
Updateme
This is the update I needed to hear today! I am so so so so happy with the positive outcome of this situation. This little girl is hopefully going to have years filled with love and support from a big family that will slowly but surely help heal her childhood trauma. The world really does still have some good in it.
>Seriously, this man (BIL) is the calmest, most loving human I have ever met. Every child in the family loves this guy. I have known him for almost 20 years, but that night he showed a side of him I had never seen before
*“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”*
― Patrick Rothfuss
I am so happy everything is going well for you and your family OP.
I am looking forward to thirty or forty years from now, when your daughter has used her pain to massively change lives and change the world. I don’t know what that’s going to look like - I am not saying she’s going to be famous for her fight against child abuse (though that’s possible) - but she is definitely going to change the lives of the people she interacts with. Heck, she’s already changed your life. The world’s a better place because she’s in it.
OP. I say this without any rancor or envy. You are definitely a better man than most. I have so much respect and admiration for you. Thank you for being the person you are, thank your amazing family for being the people they are.
I got a lump in my throat reading your update .
I've been thinking about your family ever since I read your original post.
I'm SO glad your daughter found the family she deserves.
Here's to happily ever afters ❤️
I have chills - I love how you refer to her as our girl
Congratulations! You and your wife are badasses!!
Side note: when your daughter fills out the FAFSA for college she should check the box that she was in foster care at the age of 13 - after that she immediately becomes an independent student and her financial aid will be dependent on that and not what your family income makes. This should give her the max Pell grants, etc. Of course, anything your family would like to contribute you will be able to or you can put that money aside for a nest egg for her
I just want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I used to work with children who had been sexually exploited. One of the first children I worked with, I was assigned because I had some experience and nobody else the area did. She’d been hospitalised with very serious sexual health issues, and she was (only just) a teenager, as a result of exploitation. I stayed with her all day, every day, in the hospital and her behaviour was - obviously!!! - challenging. The hospital staff quickly lost patience and I overheard them talking about how she was basically promiscuous and aren’t kids these days awful. That attitude was SO prevalent and SO unjust. She was an incredible young lady and I ended up working for years with victims of trafficking / sexual exploitation and training frontline workers like hospital staff, social workers and the police on supporting survivors. Thank you thank you thank you for raising awareness and getting people to think differently about these CHILDREN. Children CANNOT consent to their abuse.
I mean, I get why most people will lose patience, but I do believe it is because of lack of information. My mothers job is to look out for me, and I'll be honest, she did ask during one of our daughters heaviest breakdowns, if we were sure we were up for this. She could see we were completely heartbroken. But when we explained to her we weren't heartbroken over our daughter's actions, but over what she had been through that caused her to react the way she did, my mother understood and it became so much easier for her to be supportive. It has so much to do with our point of view.
Thank you for all the work you have done! You are amazing!
Right back at you, it takes a special family to truly re-parent children in a way that is therapeutic, healing. You must be so proud of your boys, too, what lovely young men you’ve raised. Your daughter is incredibly lucky to have found you, and it’s so clear you all feel lucky to have her too. I wish you so much love and happiness.
Tiny piece of advice OP: Days like father's day and mother's day may be a little difficult for your wife for some time. She may need some time to herself or just want to be distracted. Either way, make sure you communicate with her as those holidays approach. They can be very tough for people who's parents have failed at the whole parenthood thing.
> FIL did use God and the Bible a lot as reasons for his opinion
Jesus fuck. I *know* there are Christians who are decent people; my step mother is one. But just — Jesus fuck.
I mean, really, just *where* in the bible does it say to treat the downtrodden like shit?
Nowhere! Misogyny has nothing to do with either God or the Bible. In fact there are a LOT of points in the Bible that are against what FIL is doing, so we won't put this on the Bible. This one is on FIL.
Right? In fact, if anyone faces condemnation from The Bible, it's the FIL for his judgmental and hateful attitude. People like him would cause Jesus to grab a whip and start flipping tables.
"Sometimes the apple rolls away from the tree". Oh wow that is fantastic. I am so happy the apples all rolled away and are joining you in protecting this child. Congratulations on your way to becoming this girl's legal parents!
Thank you! We are in no way, shape or form perfect, but we do love hard and try not to be afraid to admit our mistakes. I do believe that has helped me to build strong relationships in life.
Why do ninjas, with their years of training in espionage, tracking, subterfuge and infiltration, always choose to use that extensive training to cut onions out of plain sight? Ninjas are weird!
I'm going to make a wild guess and say that someone showed FIL the images (if he didn't actually find them, himself). He saw them, and they aroused him. And he's blaming the daughter because he knows he should be disgusted with himself, but won't admit to any wrongdoing on his own part, so it must all be her fault.
Wholesome all around. I didn't read your last post on time, I did before reading this one, and oh boy, the tears I had to battle... Awesome job, that's what a parent should do, care and comfort, guide and support. Your family is awesome.
To your ILs, F\*them. I remember something about the color of her eyes and her height... what is that supposed to do with anything? "People will ask" so let them ask and reply "we are awesome, we are giving **our** girl all the support she lacked before, and we are not requesting anything from you or anyone that asks" and then drop them.
>the color of her eyes and her height... what is that supposed to do with anything?
This honestly confused me. We will never hide the fact that she is adopted. If people ask, we will confirm that with a smile.
You are definitely a better person than me, I would be snarky and petty when replying to the ones that dare to ask something. Awesome job, awesome people, awesome all around.
Last comment, she's your kid, she just took a little detour before getting to you.
Her “Bye dad, love you” got me right in the heart. I wish you and your family every happiness. Thank you for making a difference in all your fosters’ lives. ❤️
I have amazing parents, and still could imagine myself being adopted by you. Please keep up the good work. I wish you all the best, for your family and for your new daughter.
Your child is a victim of the hell that adults brought in to her life. Your in laws are awful for trying to put that hell on her.
Family is who you chose and I am so glad you are choosing a brave and strong young woman to join yours.
Ngl, the first time I read this, I started having doubts of this story being real because your ILs are so absurdly and comically evil straight out of a villain movie. NTA and really love the heart you got.
"When I dropped her off for practice the next day, it really hit me when she, in front of her friends and all, said "bye dad, love you"."
For my mental health I really should just read more stories like this. So heartwarming.
You’re an amazing man, and you’re raising a great family along with your wife. Both of you are great people.
I wish all the best things happen to you and your wife, and your now three kids.
Thsi is such a beautiful conclusion of what a difficult life will now lead to a beautiful one filled with love, support and best- normalcy.
It sounds like she and you guys have a great caseworker and therapist and this is still along but positive looking journey for everyone .
OP- I may be naïve with the law and its process, but can you discuss with your caseworker and daughter if having her change her name to help hide her identity with the "leaks".
Maybe something as simple as changing her first name to something of her choice may be a form of 're-birth' and shield for your daughter.
BTW - It may be early but Happy Fathers Day to a Super Hero Dad like you
Sadly in this new age and era- internet slueths and bullys are getting craftier and it may come back and haunt her as a working adult. So ensuring other forms of protection for her mental & emotional health can be added.
Thank you for pointing this out. From what I understand it is common for people in situations like this to change their name for their own protection. I won't give any information about our daughters name, but I can tell you she is safe in regards to her name.
This is such a beautiful heart warming story,well not so much the AH ILs, but other then those AH, you are amazing people and have amazing family and support system around you. Even a jaded asshole like me found this story so touching. You are doing amazing things and I hope the best from your daughter and your entire family!!
I am so so happy for you all!
Really mind boggling that people resorted to saying that she'd end up pregnant by your son. Disgusting thought process there.
Anyone who doesn't react with love and sympathy to what that girl has been through is a monster. She is so lucky to have found a loving family and you are lucky to have her.
I just want to give your family a BIG hug. It touches my heart that your boys have built a strong relationship with your daughter. Wishing you nothing but a beautiful life.
Never thought I’d be sitting at the dinner table crying for a stranger. The way you guys handled this entire situation with such grace and tact and love is so heartwarming. You broke everything down so clearly and eloquently that I literally have no further questions. I am so glad everything worked out with your daughter and that she finally had the family she deserves. I wish you wife nothing but the best on her journey to heal from her parents and I hope your entire family countries to grow. This post is genuily so inspiring. I hope one day when I’m old enough to adopt and have some council stability I can provide even a fraction of the love you have given your daughter.
I adopted a very troubled teen when she was 17 and my bios were under 5.
It was hard and we didn't have the support of everyone we had hoped but I've never regretted it. She's 25 now and is doing better than we could have hoped. If you need someone to speak too on the subject, feel free to DM me. My daughter didn't lose any benefits as a result of adoption because she was over 15 so be sure to double check what you are told there. She chose not to attend university but could have if she wanted.
I have been told 13, 15, 16 and 18. We will look more into this when it becomes relevant.
Congrats on being an amazing parent! I hoping we will still have the same feeling of our girl doing better than we could have hoped for when she's 25. Thank you for your support.
I love you, OP. I’m literally crying thru this post. I’m so happy you could provide this girl what she deserves—what we all deserve—a safe home to grow up in.
I am so thrilled for your family, and especially your daughter who has finally found her people. What an amazing and remarkable young woman.
The only update I'd wish for is when she officially becomes family, and a few details of what that celebration looks like.
Oh, and congratulations Dad. It's a girl.
Congratulations and wow this is an amazing update. I wish nothing but the best for your family and especially "your girl". She deserves happiness and peace. It sounds like she has finally found a place in the world to achieve that.
What a wonderful family you have and have built. I’m so heartened to be reminded that there are upstanding and loving people like you and your wife. And your daughter. And your boys. And your parents. And your siblings…
Wow, that’s a lot of wonderful people! ❤️
Thank you for sharing your update. Your first post was so hard to read and to know all your father is going through and what your sweet girl went through.
But WOW. What an amazing example of the barriers love can break down and the bridges it can build to help a young person heal. I can’t imagine not shedding tears when she asked to call you dad. I mean, come on! 🥲🥲
I wish you all nothing but the very best as you break generational strongholds and work to continue to build love in your lives. ♥️
>What an amazing example of the barriers love can break down and the bridges it can build to help a young person heal.
This! She has come such a long way and I am so proud of her. Thank you!
You are amazing. But please have a professional look through the content. There may be hidden folders and hidden drives that you are entirely unaware of. Can't hurt to pay a few hundred and have all the electronics closely checked for "extras" like that. If you DO find a hidden drive or concealed folders, time to contact the cops or a lawyer BEFORE you look at it. You don't want to see what's there and you don't want the accusations.
OP didn't touch the FIL's equipment, it's in the hands of professionals. LE (law enforcement) took the electronic devices and media and hauled FIL/MIL in for questioning. They haven't found anything so far, the investigation is ongoing, and let's hope this deeply uncomfortable experience makes an impact on FIL/MIL.
Probably because the police want to know how your FIL knew about those photos. That's not the sort of thing you find on the normal internet. If your father is just repeating what he heard, then he's heard it from someone who could be the kind of person who goes out looking for those types of photos.
Either way, the law is going to be very interested in who might have known about your daughter being in those photos. The courts don't release victims' names. So either your FIL has seen those photos or he knows someone who did.
The fact he's blaming your daughter makes him very, very sus, imo.
Edited to say: I saw where you said you didn't think he'd seen them. So he's friends (or acquaintances) with someone who should probably be in jail or on a sex offender list. Preferably jail.
What an emotional rollercoaster this and the previous post are!
But I'm extremely happy for your family! Sounds like you're all going to have each other's back no matter what happens, and everyone knows it. Wishing many years of happiness, goofiness, and normalcy for all of you!
Thank you for saving this young lady from a horrible life. You have a great family keep working the plan, I know your family will be happier and stronger with her in it. We need more people just like you in the world, good luck to you all and lots of love.
You, your wife, and your boys are such wonderful and rare, beautiful souls! I'm crying my eyes out in happiness for your family and your daughter! She is so lucky to have met your family, and I wish you all the best!
Ask your daughters therapist if you should make such detailed posts on the internet about her trauma and the intimate details of everyone around yous life.
You keep mentioning protecting her privacy which ...Idk man you really think this is protecting her?
Yes very entertaining for the internet. Probably less so for everyone else who is now being discussed in the post though. This would be my personal nightmare.
Ya it's fake. The adoption process isn't like how they describe for fostering. It's actually a pretty long and tedious process even if everyone is on board. Heck they even want the extended family on board most times.
The thing about the law enforcement investigation set off all the BS bells for me. That's not how anything works. You don't have to prove your innocence and allow law enforcement to comb through all your stuff to "clear your name."
Unless maybe the FIL is an idiot or did not consult a lawyer -- I suppose it's possible he willing gave them all of his items just so they could go on a fishing expedition to find something incriminating. The police's job is to prove a crime is committed, not the other way around. Otherwise they'd need a lot more evidence than that to get a warrant.
I'm sure the police might tell some suspects they just want to search their electronics and all their videos and personal items to "clear their name," because they are allowed to lie. And certainly some suspects do not consult an attorney before answering questions or submitting to a search -- any lawyer would have advised them to decline. But if they are going through that much trouble, that means they strongly suspect FIL commited a crime.
Yeah I'd say a majority of posts here (probably 90% of the ones that hit the front page) are fake, but this is one of the few I *want* to be fake, too. This update didn't need so many extra details about the kid, and could have been about 10% of the length.
If it was real it probably *would have been* 10% of the length. My man got too lost in the sauce fantasizing over his wife's brother.
Now this is the update we've anxious to hear. Congratulations to you and your daughter. May the coming decades be fantastic for you all. Thank you for sharing.
This is so damn much emotionally and otherwise/
Wishing you and your family clear thinking, love and all the damn luck
Except your inlaws they can go suck salt
This is the most amazing update… I’m so happy for you and your family! It sounds like you have a wonderful network of people surrounding you (except for that POS- but I won’t dignify him with a comment). I can’t imagine how full her heart must be, knowing she has you and your family not to call her own. 🥹
Too many onions being cut around here.
Good luck Op!! I wish you and your family all the love and happiness!!
Truly you are all inspiring and thank you for sharing.
I just wanted to say as an adopted child, thank you for everything you’ve done for her. You’re her parents now and your FIL can eat a whole bag of dicks in prison for how he’s acted.
What a whirlwind saga.
Congratulations on your soon to be official family of five!! Well done to you and all the support you have provided as well as your extended family. All the best to all of you.
I am so happy to have it come to this and look forward to your update when the time comes.
Glad you have her in therapy. These horrors are not going to go away and it is so important she understands she was a victim. Unfortunately, there will always be people like your FIL out there. She needs the kind of support you are giving g her to be stronger and not let people like that use her past against her. Is there any kind of group for other victims that she can join? Hope your family is able to help her find the peace she needs. The world could use more people like you and your wife.
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The amount of tears I have shed over this post. I'm not in a position to foster children, but I am so, sooo grateful for people like you and your wife! There's so many terrible people in the system, every wonderful family like yours keeps a child out of the hands of abusers and predators. Thank you so much for the update! Wishing all the happiness for your family 💓
It's dust I tell you, just really dusty in here
[удалено]
I practically pounced on this update when I saw it. I was so disgusted with FIL. I'm so very glad he's out of their lives.
Right? Most eagerly awaited update ever!
Onions. Somebody is cutting onions.
Those god-damn ninjas, chopping all these onions with their ninja swords and shuriken!
It's always the bloody ninjas.
I'm blaming it on the pollen here.
Yep! Way too much pollen, that's why my eyes are red!
Are your eyes leaking?
I was more steely eyed and clenched jaw trying to get thru the update post until the part where she asked to call him dad. Then the flood gates opened. I wish OP and his family all the best!
I was literally about to say that! I held my resolve right up to can I call you dad? And bye dad love you. Man its incredibly dusty in here lol I wish this family all the love in the world
Onions. Someone keeps chopping onions n my living room.
Literally trying to hold them back at my desk while I’m on a work break. I wish there were parents like this for every kid 💕
Forreal. Both of my parents were adopted so it's something I have always felt strongly about. This is beautiful. So glad you're giving this girl a new chance at life! You're amazing people.
My mom spent a lot of time in foster care. She went through some truly awful stuff, so I really have a soft spot for amazing foster parents.
I've been following since the first post too, and am filled with joy for this amazing young lady, and for all of the wonderful, supportive, and loving, members of her new family. There's one thing I wanted to mention though, @finpinnn. I know a LOT of people take Reddit stories and make videos about them on places like TikTok and Instagram. I have no idea if it could jeopardize your adoption if your amazing story goes viral, but I thought I would mention it. It's an incredible story, and I know a lot of innocent Reddit people have had their lives turned upside down because someone stole their posts and made videos about them in order to get paid, often changing the actual details to make them even more lurid and sensational. I know you've previously mentioned her SA, and unwanted photos, and I would just hate to see unscrupulous people use those details to profit from your story, and of course there's also the possibility that if that happens it could get back to people in your daughters life, such as classmates. Kids can be really cruel at this age. Not sure if you're allowed to speak vaguely in public about her situation either, but you all deserve to live your new lives together in happiness and peace, so if it were me I'd delete both posts and edit them to leave a thank you message in its place. This is in no way a critique, in a perfect world you wouldn't have to worry about crappy people stealing your amazing experience as a family to use for their own selfish reasons, but unfortunately that's just not the way it works anymore. I was r*ped as a child, and long before the internet was a thing, and years later in high school someone found out what happened when I was 11, and the cruelty I experienced from my classmates still sticks with me 39 years later, so please understand that I'm saying all of the above with love, and a desire to make sure your incredible daughter doesn't have to deal with someone splashing her story all of the internet, or risk dealing with an unhappy judge, or social worker, because some jerk online was able to follow the breadcrumb trail back to her new identity. You all deserve to live your happy lives together in peace, and some people won't respect your privacy, that's all I'm saying. Wishing all of you many, many, happy years, together as a family. Take care. 💙
I wish reddit still let us give awards. Thank you for this compassionate warning, and I'm so sorry for the pain you faced as a child.
Thank you for your kind words, I really appreciate it so much. 💙 The one thing that hasn't changed since I was in high school is that kids can be really cruel to each other sometimes, and now a rumor can spread like wildfire within minutes online. I can't tell you how grateful I am that the internet didn't exist when I was still in high school, but I saw how quickly things can spread online, and ruin lives, when my boys were still young. It's sad that the Reddit community has to worry about things like this now, but I felt compelled to say something in case he didn't know that these kinds of things are happening very often now unfortunately.
Just tagging OP u/Finnpinnn to alert them to your kind and helpful comment!
Ninja onion cutters, have been sneaking around spreading cut onions around people reading this post. Seriously, congrats OP, I hope everything in your girls future goes well. (Also love that you refer to her as our girl) ❤️
Thank you! Legally she's not ours yet, but to us that's not the most important thing. The love is what makes her ours and us hers.
100% this. 😭 now this is what I call a rich family. So good to read good news in this sub.
I'm telling you, all the money in the world couldn't buy the feeling I got when she said bye dad so naturally. I truly feel rich.
WHO IS CUTTING THE ONIONS!!!!!! Op. This makes me so happy for your family.
Don't get how he kept it together when she asked to call him dad. I'm always half way to full on ugly crying whenever I read a kid saying that, I can't imagine what it feels like when you're the parent.
At her age I was just not expecting her to want to change how she refered to us and I fully respected that. It was the initial shock I think. Trust me, I did ugly cry after I dropped her off though.
You may not be in a position to foster, but mentors are important and there’s always a need. Best wishes.
Seriously! I can’t stop crying over this post. My heart goes out to his daughter for going through something so traumatic, and I’m happy she’s now part of such a loving family. 💜
Please update us when the adoption is final!!!
Seriously!! I am crying so much right now. OP you and your wife and your boys.. and apparently your parents and siblings in law.. you’re all saints. I am so happy for you. Life is tough. I wish I knew you so I could watch this sweet girl grow up. My husband and I would like to adopt someday, and this post just makes me feel so much stronger about that.
Congrats on your new daughter! You have navigated this difficult situation with wisdom. Uou seem like really good people and I wish your family all the best.
Eff the IL's. I don't know if it's a generational thing, but my goodness, what is with the boomer generation and the whole and entire lack of anything that resembles empathy?! That poor child has CLEARLY been through something so bloody horrific, at what sounds like an exceptionally young age if she's a mid-teen now, and the ONLY thing the FIL could focus on was discussing her like she was an object to be vilified. Also OP, if you ever read this comment, just as an FYI from someone who grew up around religious zealots, YOU and your wife and sons are demonstrating FAR more religious piety than your FIL has in a life time.
Absolutely! OP-- you and your wife are a national treasure. You're such wonderful, loving people. Fortunately in your family, those apples(your children) haven't rolled an inch; they're as close to the tree as possible. Continued best wishes. God bless!
As I sit here with teary eyes, feel necessary to say the lack of empathy ISN’T generational. Please don’t lump all Boomers into this FIL/MIL twisted thinking.
To make this statement even broader, please don't lump all into . Negative stereotypes are mean for obvious reasons, and positive stereotypes make people feel lesser when they don't align with them. Stereotyping is bad.
Good lord I’m crying at my desk. This is so beautiful and I’m so glad that little girl is getting a real family. I don’t trust that FIL one bit. I don’t care how many electronics he gave up, I’d never trust him again. The top rated comment on the original post said it all - the fact that FIL doesn’t see this little girl as a victim, says something about him and his lack of morals regarding age and consent. He should not be trusted around children.
discussing who is distributing or has been a part of CP as "small town gossip" doesn't pass my smell test, as someone who grew up in a small town.
Same. Not buying it one bit. Not unless his small town buddies are also into CSAM
exactly.
The things he said sound too much like he has been browsing cp. He absolutely thinks the children are the ones in the wrong for being abused. Disgusting.
“They deserve it, they like it” is absolutely a justification
Those electronics need to be checked out by a professional. I don't CARE if the police department takes seven months to return them to FIL. There may be hidden folders, partitioned drives, and a million other ways to hide incriminating evidence. I'd hand them over period so they can look through the machines and see what is on there. If you can't legally give them to the police due to chain-of-evidence and such, you CAN take them to an electronics expert. Tell them what you expect and fear to find and to search them all carefully. They can call the cops if they find something as part of their own jobs.
Who knows if this dude has a burner phone for porn? Its easy to hide electronics
Oh, not one of us is smart enough with computers or anything tech to take this on ourselves. I won't go in to too much details, but it is 100% being done by professionals.
I am very glad you are wise enough to do that :D I really hope you don't find anything...but I am not counting on it.
No matter what they find or don't find on those electronics, he absolutely should not be trusted around children if he's going to say hideous things to and about them. That on its own is enough to warrant complete loss of trust.
I agree 100%. I will admit I didn't see the bigger picture right away because I was caught up in his disgusting opinion of someone, a child, who I love so dearly. And I do have the tendency to think I am overreacting and I always try to see other peoples perspective, so I needed time to wrap my head around this situation. Obviously keeping the children away from these people, just in case, until I was thinking clearly again. It sounds stupid now, I get that. But yes, there is just no way things can get even partially back on track from here with these people.
Agreed. Everything I hear about the craftier types of people who have CSAM is that they are in the absolute last places anyone could ever think of looking. Like stuff like a whole other hard drive sitting in a computer that just looks like any other part of the computer until a wire is shifted (think I saw something like that on Reddit within the last year. I think someone bought a thrifted PC or something like that?), or a flash drive in a hollowed out book somewhere, etc. any obvious electronic devices would be the place I'd least expect CSAM to actually be on
Thank you for these pointers!
Beautiful update. Enjoy your happy family without your shitty ILs.
Never in an update (read the first post before the update) have I ever gone from seething anger to balling my eyes out in pure joy. You are good people and we need more people like you and your wife.
Never in my life have I been this chocked, angry, dissappointed and sad while my heart is so filled with love and happiness. It's safe to say my head is all over the place these days. Thank you so much!
That’s such a good way to put it because yeah same lol.
Not going to lie, needed this update lol Best of luck, homie. You sound like a great dad and am so happy this poor girl gets a shot at a real and happy life!
When the adoption is official. Yall need a "it's a girl" sign placed outside. A "baby shower" would also be great to have. I'm so happy for your family. As for your FIL, I hope he feels embarrassed and ashamed for being investigated by the fbi.
Make a registry for her at Target and Barnes & Noble, and tell friends and family how to donate money to her college fund. This is as close to a fairytale ending as it’s possible to have in the hellscape that is the modern world. OP, you and your wife have done a great job raising your sons, and I’m willing to bet that’s one of the reasons your daughter fits in so well with your family. Congrats on your new addition, and please let us know when it’s official so we can all celebrate with you!
Aw, this is such a cute idea! If she’s down for it, of course, but it’s such a lovely way to commemorate a big life change!
Awwwww! Like one of those enormous stork signs? I LOVE this idea!!
When my friends’ parents adopted two girls (teenagers as well) our church held a “baby” shower for them!!! It was so nice and very cool!!!
All these ideas are great! We will definitely keep them in mind when the time comes.
I hadn’t read the first post, so I went back and read the whole thing. What a roller coaster of emotions ending on a great note. Continue being an excellent dad. All the best to your family.
Been thinking about your family since I read the first post. So happy to hear about the adoption and your family’s happiness. 💓
>She was truly alone in this world when she came to us. She is now in the process of gaining a sh\*t ton of family that she never had before. That's a lot to take in as a teenager. Our intent is to guide and help her as much as we can in her relationship with everyone in our family, but to do that, we need to know what kind of relationship our family is ready to have with her. This made me cry. You are wonderful parents. Congratulations on gaining a daughter!
I apologize in advance if my comment seems jumbled. My thoughts about this situation are all over the place. The fact that your family found your daughter and has helped her so much has me so hopeful for other kids. See, I was a child who had been SA'd, no idea for how long because I was VERY young at the time and my memories of it are fuzzy and uncomfortable. My abuser (well the first) was my father. It took me a long time to get to a place where I could even admit that to anyone. I knew that what he had done was wrong, but I internalized it so much that somehow I felt I was the bad one. I have NEVER had the feeling that anyone loves me. No one has ever cared enough about me to want to help me get better. All of the work I have done to get through this has been up to me. I am so glad she has you guys. She has parents who love her and want her to be the best version of herself. Brothers who she can joke with and be a teenager around. Family that loves her for who she is, and allows her space to feel. Keep up the great work. People like me, need to know that people like you exist and are helping the kids like me. Your daughter has a chance now. She can feel like a real person. She deserves that and so much more.
Hey Happy District. I am confident that I speak for almost everyone here when I say this: we care about you getting better. We love you enough to be invested, to want to help, to just in general be of support. I am 100% certain that there are literally thousands of people who agree with me. You are an absolute rock star, and you will continue to slay dragons. You are never ever alone.
OMG, I cried reading this, mostly happy tears. I wish you and your family all the best for your future! You all sound like amazing, loving people! Please update us on when the adoption is official. Hugs, love, prayers, positive vibes/thoughts, whatever you & your family need is being sent your way! 🩵 Updateme
This is the update I needed to hear today! I am so so so so happy with the positive outcome of this situation. This little girl is hopefully going to have years filled with love and support from a big family that will slowly but surely help heal her childhood trauma. The world really does still have some good in it.
>Seriously, this man (BIL) is the calmest, most loving human I have ever met. Every child in the family loves this guy. I have known him for almost 20 years, but that night he showed a side of him I had never seen before *“There are three things all wise men fear: the sea in storm, a night with no moon, and the anger of a gentle man.”* ― Patrick Rothfuss I am so happy everything is going well for you and your family OP.
That third book is coming any day, now. *weeps uncontrollably*
I'm not crying, you're crying.
I am looking forward to thirty or forty years from now, when your daughter has used her pain to massively change lives and change the world. I don’t know what that’s going to look like - I am not saying she’s going to be famous for her fight against child abuse (though that’s possible) - but she is definitely going to change the lives of the people she interacts with. Heck, she’s already changed your life. The world’s a better place because she’s in it.
Love your last sentence and fully agree! This girl has taught me so much and she's smart. I can only imagine what she can accomplish in life.
Every once in a while I come across someone and think to myself “This person is a better man than I am.” This is definitely one of those times.
Easy there. I do this too. But in the end I think good people are better than they think they are.
OP. I say this without any rancor or envy. You are definitely a better man than most. I have so much respect and admiration for you. Thank you for being the person you are, thank your amazing family for being the people they are.
I got a lump in my throat reading your update . I've been thinking about your family ever since I read your original post. I'm SO glad your daughter found the family she deserves. Here's to happily ever afters ❤️
I have chills - I love how you refer to her as our girl Congratulations! You and your wife are badasses!! Side note: when your daughter fills out the FAFSA for college she should check the box that she was in foster care at the age of 13 - after that she immediately becomes an independent student and her financial aid will be dependent on that and not what your family income makes. This should give her the max Pell grants, etc. Of course, anything your family would like to contribute you will be able to or you can put that money aside for a nest egg for her
Thank you! I will definitely save this information for when this becomes relevant!
I just want to say thank you, from the bottom of my heart. I used to work with children who had been sexually exploited. One of the first children I worked with, I was assigned because I had some experience and nobody else the area did. She’d been hospitalised with very serious sexual health issues, and she was (only just) a teenager, as a result of exploitation. I stayed with her all day, every day, in the hospital and her behaviour was - obviously!!! - challenging. The hospital staff quickly lost patience and I overheard them talking about how she was basically promiscuous and aren’t kids these days awful. That attitude was SO prevalent and SO unjust. She was an incredible young lady and I ended up working for years with victims of trafficking / sexual exploitation and training frontline workers like hospital staff, social workers and the police on supporting survivors. Thank you thank you thank you for raising awareness and getting people to think differently about these CHILDREN. Children CANNOT consent to their abuse.
I mean, I get why most people will lose patience, but I do believe it is because of lack of information. My mothers job is to look out for me, and I'll be honest, she did ask during one of our daughters heaviest breakdowns, if we were sure we were up for this. She could see we were completely heartbroken. But when we explained to her we weren't heartbroken over our daughter's actions, but over what she had been through that caused her to react the way she did, my mother understood and it became so much easier for her to be supportive. It has so much to do with our point of view. Thank you for all the work you have done! You are amazing!
Right back at you, it takes a special family to truly re-parent children in a way that is therapeutic, healing. You must be so proud of your boys, too, what lovely young men you’ve raised. Your daughter is incredibly lucky to have found you, and it’s so clear you all feel lucky to have her too. I wish you so much love and happiness.
Tiny piece of advice OP: Days like father's day and mother's day may be a little difficult for your wife for some time. She may need some time to herself or just want to be distracted. Either way, make sure you communicate with her as those holidays approach. They can be very tough for people who's parents have failed at the whole parenthood thing.
Thank you for pointing this out. I will definitely keep this in mind.
This right here is what life is all about.
> FIL did use God and the Bible a lot as reasons for his opinion Jesus fuck. I *know* there are Christians who are decent people; my step mother is one. But just — Jesus fuck. I mean, really, just *where* in the bible does it say to treat the downtrodden like shit?
Nowhere! Misogyny has nothing to do with either God or the Bible. In fact there are a LOT of points in the Bible that are against what FIL is doing, so we won't put this on the Bible. This one is on FIL.
Right? In fact, if anyone faces condemnation from The Bible, it's the FIL for his judgmental and hateful attitude. People like him would cause Jesus to grab a whip and start flipping tables.
You know, if I had a time machine, that's one of the historical events I'd love to visit.
Oh I would love to be a fly on the wall if Jesus gave FIL a lecture face to face! Ngl, it's a funny thought.
God damned it *Feels my black heart melting* I'm not crying reading this post you're crying t_t
"Sometimes the apple rolls away from the tree". Oh wow that is fantastic. I am so happy the apples all rolled away and are joining you in protecting this child. Congratulations on your way to becoming this girl's legal parents!
Thanks for being genuine and true to your word. Your family is a great model to live by and I hope it's is something I can take with me.
Thank you! We are in no way, shape or form perfect, but we do love hard and try not to be afraid to admit our mistakes. I do believe that has helped me to build strong relationships in life.
Why do ninjas, with their years of training in espionage, tracking, subterfuge and infiltration, always choose to use that extensive training to cut onions out of plain sight? Ninjas are weird!
I'm going to make a wild guess and say that someone showed FIL the images (if he didn't actually find them, himself). He saw them, and they aroused him. And he's blaming the daughter because he knows he should be disgusted with himself, but won't admit to any wrongdoing on his own part, so it must all be her fault.
Wholesome all around. I didn't read your last post on time, I did before reading this one, and oh boy, the tears I had to battle... Awesome job, that's what a parent should do, care and comfort, guide and support. Your family is awesome. To your ILs, F\*them. I remember something about the color of her eyes and her height... what is that supposed to do with anything? "People will ask" so let them ask and reply "we are awesome, we are giving **our** girl all the support she lacked before, and we are not requesting anything from you or anyone that asks" and then drop them.
>the color of her eyes and her height... what is that supposed to do with anything? This honestly confused me. We will never hide the fact that she is adopted. If people ask, we will confirm that with a smile.
You are definitely a better person than me, I would be snarky and petty when replying to the ones that dare to ask something. Awesome job, awesome people, awesome all around. Last comment, she's your kid, she just took a little detour before getting to you.
Her “Bye dad, love you” got me right in the heart. I wish you and your family every happiness. Thank you for making a difference in all your fosters’ lives. ❤️
Good shit
Great work dad! apart from the FIL bull crap this is an outstanding update. Wishing your family the best!
This brought tears to my eyes. I'm very happy for OP's family.
God bless you and your family.
I have amazing parents, and still could imagine myself being adopted by you. Please keep up the good work. I wish you all the best, for your family and for your new daughter.
Your child is a victim of the hell that adults brought in to her life. Your in laws are awful for trying to put that hell on her. Family is who you chose and I am so glad you are choosing a brave and strong young woman to join yours.
Ngl, the first time I read this, I started having doubts of this story being real because your ILs are so absurdly and comically evil straight out of a villain movie. NTA and really love the heart you got.
Honestly, it felt unreal, so I get your point of view.
"When I dropped her off for practice the next day, it really hit me when she, in front of her friends and all, said "bye dad, love you"." For my mental health I really should just read more stories like this. So heartwarming.
You’re an amazing man, and you’re raising a great family along with your wife. Both of you are great people. I wish all the best things happen to you and your wife, and your now three kids.
Thsi is such a beautiful conclusion of what a difficult life will now lead to a beautiful one filled with love, support and best- normalcy. It sounds like she and you guys have a great caseworker and therapist and this is still along but positive looking journey for everyone . OP- I may be naïve with the law and its process, but can you discuss with your caseworker and daughter if having her change her name to help hide her identity with the "leaks". Maybe something as simple as changing her first name to something of her choice may be a form of 're-birth' and shield for your daughter. BTW - It may be early but Happy Fathers Day to a Super Hero Dad like you Sadly in this new age and era- internet slueths and bullys are getting craftier and it may come back and haunt her as a working adult. So ensuring other forms of protection for her mental & emotional health can be added.
Thank you for pointing this out. From what I understand it is common for people in situations like this to change their name for their own protection. I won't give any information about our daughters name, but I can tell you she is safe in regards to her name.
This is such a beautiful heart warming story,well not so much the AH ILs, but other then those AH, you are amazing people and have amazing family and support system around you. Even a jaded asshole like me found this story so touching. You are doing amazing things and I hope the best from your daughter and your entire family!!
💖💖💖💖
I am so so happy for you all! Really mind boggling that people resorted to saying that she'd end up pregnant by your son. Disgusting thought process there.
Thank you! Agree, smh.
Anyone who doesn't react with love and sympathy to what that girl has been through is a monster. She is so lucky to have found a loving family and you are lucky to have her.
I just want to give your family a BIG hug. It touches my heart that your boys have built a strong relationship with your daughter. Wishing you nothing but a beautiful life.
Onion cutting ninjas invaded my home. I'm crying. God bless you!
Never thought I’d be sitting at the dinner table crying for a stranger. The way you guys handled this entire situation with such grace and tact and love is so heartwarming. You broke everything down so clearly and eloquently that I literally have no further questions. I am so glad everything worked out with your daughter and that she finally had the family she deserves. I wish you wife nothing but the best on her journey to heal from her parents and I hope your entire family countries to grow. This post is genuily so inspiring. I hope one day when I’m old enough to adopt and have some council stability I can provide even a fraction of the love you have given your daughter.
Who is cutting onions here during the last part 😭🥹
Beautiful
I adopted a very troubled teen when she was 17 and my bios were under 5. It was hard and we didn't have the support of everyone we had hoped but I've never regretted it. She's 25 now and is doing better than we could have hoped. If you need someone to speak too on the subject, feel free to DM me. My daughter didn't lose any benefits as a result of adoption because she was over 15 so be sure to double check what you are told there. She chose not to attend university but could have if she wanted.
I have been told 13, 15, 16 and 18. We will look more into this when it becomes relevant. Congrats on being an amazing parent! I hoping we will still have the same feeling of our girl doing better than we could have hoped for when she's 25. Thank you for your support.
I just read this and the original post. Thank you for reminding us all of the beauty in this world.
Maybe I missed it but did FIL ever say HOW he knew about the photos?
Gossip
Bro couldn't figure out how to write a conclusion to that plot thread so he just handwaved it, lol.
I love you, OP. I’m literally crying thru this post. I’m so happy you could provide this girl what she deserves—what we all deserve—a safe home to grow up in.
Congratulations on your family of FIVE! Keep being good people.
I am so thrilled for your family, and especially your daughter who has finally found her people. What an amazing and remarkable young woman. The only update I'd wish for is when she officially becomes family, and a few details of what that celebration looks like. Oh, and congratulations Dad. It's a girl.
Congratulations and wow this is an amazing update. I wish nothing but the best for your family and especially "your girl". She deserves happiness and peace. It sounds like she has finally found a place in the world to achieve that.
What a wonderful family you have and have built. I’m so heartened to be reminded that there are upstanding and loving people like you and your wife. And your daughter. And your boys. And your parents. And your siblings… Wow, that’s a lot of wonderful people! ❤️
We are surrounded by a lot of wonderful people. Thank you for pointing that out and remind me to appreciate them during all this ❤
Thank you for sharing your update. Your first post was so hard to read and to know all your father is going through and what your sweet girl went through. But WOW. What an amazing example of the barriers love can break down and the bridges it can build to help a young person heal. I can’t imagine not shedding tears when she asked to call you dad. I mean, come on! 🥲🥲 I wish you all nothing but the very best as you break generational strongholds and work to continue to build love in your lives. ♥️
>What an amazing example of the barriers love can break down and the bridges it can build to help a young person heal. This! She has come such a long way and I am so proud of her. Thank you!
You are amazing. But please have a professional look through the content. There may be hidden folders and hidden drives that you are entirely unaware of. Can't hurt to pay a few hundred and have all the electronics closely checked for "extras" like that. If you DO find a hidden drive or concealed folders, time to contact the cops or a lawyer BEFORE you look at it. You don't want to see what's there and you don't want the accusations.
OP didn't touch the FIL's equipment, it's in the hands of professionals. LE (law enforcement) took the electronic devices and media and hauled FIL/MIL in for questioning. They haven't found anything so far, the investigation is ongoing, and let's hope this deeply uncomfortable experience makes an impact on FIL/MIL.
If it is just gossip, hopefully the police figure out who leaked the daughter’s information and get in their ass.
Yes, they are actually taking this more serious than I expected, even if it's seemingly "just" gossip.
Probably because the police want to know how your FIL knew about those photos. That's not the sort of thing you find on the normal internet. If your father is just repeating what he heard, then he's heard it from someone who could be the kind of person who goes out looking for those types of photos. Either way, the law is going to be very interested in who might have known about your daughter being in those photos. The courts don't release victims' names. So either your FIL has seen those photos or he knows someone who did. The fact he's blaming your daughter makes him very, very sus, imo. Edited to say: I saw where you said you didn't think he'd seen them. So he's friends (or acquaintances) with someone who should probably be in jail or on a sex offender list. Preferably jail.
I wish I'd met people like you and your family (not including your FIL in that group) when I was a kid. Thank you.
The onions, the onions got me again
What an emotional rollercoaster this and the previous post are! But I'm extremely happy for your family! Sounds like you're all going to have each other's back no matter what happens, and everyone knows it. Wishing many years of happiness, goofiness, and normalcy for all of you!
Onions … who’s been chopping onions … my heart ❤️ I’m so happy for you all ❤️
Thank you for saving this young lady from a horrible life. You have a great family keep working the plan, I know your family will be happier and stronger with her in it. We need more people just like you in the world, good luck to you all and lots of love.
FIL: Christian, Quotes the Bible. Does exactly the opposite of what Jesus told him to do... I hope he goes back and gets it right.
You, your wife, and your boys are such wonderful and rare, beautiful souls! I'm crying my eyes out in happiness for your family and your daughter! She is so lucky to have met your family, and I wish you all the best!
Ask your daughters therapist if you should make such detailed posts on the internet about her trauma and the intimate details of everyone around yous life. You keep mentioning protecting her privacy which ...Idk man you really think this is protecting her? Yes very entertaining for the internet. Probably less so for everyone else who is now being discussed in the post though. This would be my personal nightmare.
Well, when its not real its not as bad. Reading the original band then this one, creative writing exercises.
Ya it's fake. The adoption process isn't like how they describe for fostering. It's actually a pretty long and tedious process even if everyone is on board. Heck they even want the extended family on board most times.
The thing about the law enforcement investigation set off all the BS bells for me. That's not how anything works. You don't have to prove your innocence and allow law enforcement to comb through all your stuff to "clear your name." Unless maybe the FIL is an idiot or did not consult a lawyer -- I suppose it's possible he willing gave them all of his items just so they could go on a fishing expedition to find something incriminating. The police's job is to prove a crime is committed, not the other way around. Otherwise they'd need a lot more evidence than that to get a warrant. I'm sure the police might tell some suspects they just want to search their electronics and all their videos and personal items to "clear their name," because they are allowed to lie. And certainly some suspects do not consult an attorney before answering questions or submitting to a search -- any lawyer would have advised them to decline. But if they are going through that much trouble, that means they strongly suspect FIL commited a crime.
Yeah I'd say a majority of posts here (probably 90% of the ones that hit the front page) are fake, but this is one of the few I *want* to be fake, too. This update didn't need so many extra details about the kid, and could have been about 10% of the length. If it was real it probably *would have been* 10% of the length. My man got too lost in the sauce fantasizing over his wife's brother.
That’s beautiful. I’m just going to have a good cry before work. You, your wife and your kids are just amazing people.
Okay excuse me while I blub a little. Congratulations to your family.
Now this is the update we've anxious to hear. Congratulations to you and your daughter. May the coming decades be fantastic for you all. Thank you for sharing.
I work in an office but I swear someone is cutting onions ver close to me.
OOOOOOOMMMMMMGGGGGGG THIS HAS BEEN THE UPDATE I BEEN WAITING FOR CONGRATULATIONS <3 I wish u guys nothing buthappiness. YAY
This made me so happy. Thanks for updating us. All the best to you and your amazing family ❤️
Updateme
Bravo to you all
Happy life to all of you! I cried a little, when she said bye dad, love you...
Thank you! I cried a lot...
Who is cutting onions???? 😊 Love this update. Congratulations all of your family…..except FIL, he can wallow in his own disgusting filth 💩
This made me cry, happy cry. So glad everything went well. All the best for the future x
I’ve been waiting for this update. I’m so so happy for you and your family! You all deserve nothing but the best 🖤
Is very rare that something makes me cry on Reddit but I am sobbing right now 😭😭😭
UpdateMe!
I have very sweaty eyes right now. You and your wife and kids are incredible people, and it brings me so much joy to read this.
This is so damn much emotionally and otherwise/ Wishing you and your family clear thinking, love and all the damn luck Except your inlaws they can go suck salt
I am crying happy tears for you and your daughter. Thank you for making the right moves to protect her from FIL. Wishing the best for your family.
💗💗💗💗💗
Bah I’ve been waiting on tis update. Good luck to you and your family. All of you seem to be navigating in the best way
This is the most amazing update… I’m so happy for you and your family! It sounds like you have a wonderful network of people surrounding you (except for that POS- but I won’t dignify him with a comment). I can’t imagine how full her heart must be, knowing she has you and your family not to call her own. 🥹
Too many onions being cut around here. Good luck Op!! I wish you and your family all the love and happiness!! Truly you are all inspiring and thank you for sharing.
Damn onion cutting ninjas! I'm at work.
Damn OP got me crying on the train 🥹 So happy for you all. What an amazing family (in laws aside)
I cry so rarely, but man this really got me. I’m rooting so hard for your daughter.
Updateme
Yay I’m so happy to read this update. Congratulations 💖
Beautiful update. Wish you and your lovely family all the best ❤️
I just wanted to say as an adopted child, thank you for everything you’ve done for her. You’re her parents now and your FIL can eat a whole bag of dicks in prison for how he’s acted.
You and your wife are wonderful people. We need more folks like you on the world. Blessings to you and your family.
Every time he referred to her as “our girl,” I teared up.🥹
Congrats so much. Damn these ninjas cutting onions.
Sometimes i really wish I have the death note and I'll sacrifice half of my lifespan for the shinigami's eye to get rid of those horrific abusers.
What a whirlwind saga. Congratulations on your soon to be official family of five!! Well done to you and all the support you have provided as well as your extended family. All the best to all of you. I am so happy to have it come to this and look forward to your update when the time comes.
Glad you have her in therapy. These horrors are not going to go away and it is so important she understands she was a victim. Unfortunately, there will always be people like your FIL out there. She needs the kind of support you are giving g her to be stronger and not let people like that use her past against her. Is there any kind of group for other victims that she can join? Hope your family is able to help her find the peace she needs. The world could use more people like you and your wife.
Thank you for adopting a “troubled teenager.” I’m so happy she found you and your family ❤️😭
Congrats, beautiful update!
This is amazing. Thank you for this update and good luck to you and this beautiful family.
All great news! Wishing everyone all the best!