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BlunterSales

i’ve never complained about my partner’s tightness lol, where the hell are these ah guys coming from


Stonegen70

Some men seem to want to destroy their sex lives. lol. Maybe it’s my age but ive learned to not say shit that would give me wife a reason to not want to do anything. Number 1 on that list. Don’t insult her vagina. WTH


[deleted]

Yeah, these vagina “experts” sound like dbags that like to mind fuck their girlfriends.


NecessaryAudience462

*Mentally abusive narcissistic dbags


No-Educator-7627

Same as women who say “ my ex was larger” Same energy


manateefourmation

I’ve been with many women. Someone I was seriously involved with had a vagina that was so un-tight (I know that’s not a word), that it made PIV less enjoyable. I didn’t say anything because there was nothing she could do about it, but it was a thing.


m_bello

There is a LOT that can be done! There are muscles down there that can provide a good squeeze.


TheRarPar

I think what he means is that nothing good can come of speaking up about something like that


Ianley

Yep. Totally this. Everyone accepts (well, because it’s there for everyone to see) that dicks come in a variety of sizes, so why not vaginas? I’ve experienced everything from very tight to very loose and then those in that perfect ‘sweet spot’ where your bits just seem to fit like they were made for each other. Agreed on not saying anything though.


Sensitive-Regular505

But i guess it‘s a thing, right? I kinda feel hurt but not sure if i have the right. He said he rather tell and find a solution than pretend - i wouldn‘t call his penis small (i dont think he is) but i also don‘t care


sirbearus

No it isn't a thing. Vaginas are not all the same and they are not even the same from session to session. Your vagina will loosen. and tighten, with excitement arousal as well as monthly changes. This guy has less experience than he claimed and almost no ability to communicate with a partner is a way which is going to be helpful. You are fine and his comment was unnecessary and hurtful, even if it wasn't intended to be. You are fine. Really, it is his problem and has nothing to do with your vagina. Edited to replace listen for loosen. However it was tempting to leave as typed.


MaikuKokoro

I've noticed overall differences in tightness from partner to partner, but never to a degree that effected the actual sex. It would be weird to think there isn't a difference in width, muscle tightness, and even depth to a degree from woman to woman. Guys have different penis shapes and sizes. It stands to reason the same for women. What people need to do is not focus on it because it's nothing we can change to any meaningful degree.


LilCakey81

Tighten? Im pretty sure it does the opposite of that when aroused tbh. Like the muscles relax, allowing for penetration. After sex is done itll go back to its normal state which id assuming is when the "tightening" would happen.


_TyrannosaurusSexy

I take it that he was saying that it will be “looser” or “tighter” based on level of arousal. I.e., when highly aroused, and the muscles are more relaxed vs when less aroused and they are more constricted. I didn’t take it as him saying that it “tightens” when one is aroused - just basically, that overall arousal can have an effect on the muscles (or feelings of tightness) in a general sense. But on another note, & to be fair, in many (possibly the vast majority) of us, they also highly contract during orgasm as well (not saying that one has to always be aroused to experience orgasm by any means, as I’m sure we all know that that’s not the case - nor does every female contract during orgasm - but I think it’s common enough for many to tie those experiences together in that sense.


LilCakey81

It is highly possible that my dumbass brain skipped over the grammar he used, which changed the entire sentence in my brain 🤣🤣 Also you are right, I have heard of many women contracting during an orgasm also when they sneeze. Fun little body things.


LittleSeizures7

If your clit gets worked chances are you will tighten all the way up to orgasm


manateefourmation

You are truly not doing her any favors by affirming her physiology when you have no idea about her. To be clear, this guy is a jerk, but physiology varies on a wide spectrum. The correct answer here is pretty clear. If she is concerned she should talk to her gynecologist, not take advice from a Reddit sub.


WellActuallyUmm

Stop saying everyone is fine. Dicks can be small, dicks can be large, the same is true for vaginas. Not every dick is made for every vagina and vice versa. He isn’t a prick for bringing it up. Heaven forbid we be mature adults and have frank discussions. But “muh self esteem” can’t take the hit I spose. Stop protecting fragility.


azhotwife247

This is very true....before my first orgasm I am very tight and my hubby at 7in is basically hitting bottom. After that first orgasm though....i become VERY WET and nearly bottomless from my pussy "tenting". I can take much bigger men balls deep after that.


hubrisnxs

That's not very helpful. The way he said it may have been wrong, but we encourage people to be honest, and if keeping quiet will end the relationship, maybe he should have said something. To be clear, there is NOTHING wrong with you, OP. Some of the responses intuition may well be true: if he thinks the tunnel is wide he's likely driving a compact car. But your post had a question, and I'm glad to say it has a wonderful answer: Yes! You absolutely can do kegels! Even absent this guy, regardless of their size, practicing kegels will make you extremely attractive to future lovers, and word tell is it can add much to your own enjoyment.


Asmalls3332

And you get better orgasms 😻


Beginning_Cherry_798

Disagree. I've been around the block (52M). At one extreme, there was a woman I couldn't even penetrate bc she was so tight. On the other, a woman who basically felt like fucking air. It very much is a thing, just like dick size. Did I ever mention it? Nope. Just didn't see how it would benefit the situation. Interesting, too, that the guy is basically inviting commentary on his body to account for the looseness, lol.


manateefourmation

Yes. It’s a thing. Anyone who is telling you it is not so as to not hurt your feelings are doing you a disservice. It’s like some men have small or thin penises and some have thick or long. It’s just physiological. That said, I have no idea if you are or you are not or what this guy is working with. And even if it is true, he handled it so poorly. Talk to your gynecologist. At the end of the day someone who loves you will not care about this, even if it’s true. There are lots of ways to experience sexual pleasure.


LittleSeizures7

I had a girl that would start with a less than firm grip and get tighter as she approached orgasm. I would try the Coital Alingment Technique otherwise known as the CAT sex postion. It helps women cum by putting pressure on your clit and naturally it feels good to kegel. I have to kegel to cum from penetration even as a man. (solo or w girl)


Whimsyblue13

Maybe his Willy is too small.


TransportationNo5560

Or maybe he has a really tight grip when he buffs the Bishop. There's a definite correlation between masturbation and not knowing what a real p*ssy feels like


shantisommers

The sensation of tightness is affected by the muscle tone in your pelvic floor. Get yourself some Ben wah balls and roll them around in your pussy for a few weeks. Guarantee he'll notice the difference


[deleted]

Tell him he is the smallest u ever had. And u rather tell him and find a solution, than pretend :)


Trudestiny

Possible the other women he was with weren’t as aroused and he is thinking that the resulting tighter vagina is a good thing instead of thinking the exact opposite Finding a solution , maybe he can make his penis bigger . Not saying this should or could be your response but it’s along the same lines as him telling you that you are too loose


StudioGangster1

That’s what think it was


[deleted]

What kind of jerk would insult your pussy? Ditch this loser.


LeafyLustere

He's probably just used to women being unaroused


Mundane-Training-419

Hint - saying that to her or any female isn’t helping get her aroused.lol


kwagenknight

Check out OP's post history relating to this older bf.


PM-urCute-boobies

That’s what I was gunna say. The more aroused the less “tight”. Which to be honest, at least I’m lasting way longer this way


MadameMonk

And the woman is lined up for more orgasms. How is that not a win for everyone, right?


davesburner

Not necessarily. Some women use their pelvic floor (?) muscles more than others. Like they even squeeze your dick as they get excited (ex cum). I’ve also noticed that the gspot is very noticeable in some women. Like you can feel the ridges (even with your penis). With other women, there’s little to no feeling other than warmth. Vaginas are also different sizes (just like penises) though I really doubt that’s what’s happening here. All of that said, I don’t know that I’d ever say something to my girlfriend. Telling a girl she’s “loose” has the same relationship ending potential and telling a guy he’s got a small dick.


esmith42223

He really did just tell on himself didn’t he 😬 Next he’s gonna say she’s too wet for him


PurrrRhyn

"She's too wet for him", is this a common thing you hear? Is it a real thing? ...sadly I've heard it, and am sincerely curious


DieGottinx

This is probably true lol.


[deleted]

[удалено]


the_moog_hunter

Exactly, he just told on himself


torontomanstyll123

but its not being too small. Vaginas come in diff sizes and can be wider than others


MadameMonk

It could be either of these situations, or both. Or just negging.


Huge_Aerie2435

Most people here just want to side with OP and not have nuance injected into things. Here, all Vulva are created exactly the same.


torontomanstyll123

I dont blame them. Think about how much people the average person(man) has had sex with.. id bet not a lot. I think a lot of average vaginas are so similar that most people experience the same tightness. But for people who have more experience or just "luck" to experience a different vagina they can come to understand the difference.


JSlove

Fuck this body shamer. Let's body shame him!


Tuamalaidir85

Fuck body shaming, let’s body shame. The woke have arrived


Time_to_go_viking

This is literally the problem.


WillowTea_

Excessive kegels can actually damage your pelvic floor. The good (bad?) news is, you don’t have a vagina problem, you have a partner problem.


Individual_Shirt_228

True. My pelvic floor physical therapist told me this.


PurrrRhyn

I've been looking into a pelvic flor physical therapist. Are you happy with your experience with the therapy?


Individual_Shirt_228

It’s been okay, I only went a few times because all the exercises I can do at home myself anyways. It was a good experience though!


AJ-tech3

How can it damage it?


Apple_Crisp

Make it too tense and unable to relax. Causes all sorts of issues including incontinence.


Token_Ese

It can lead to dyspareunia, or pain with sex, because the muscles are too tense and cannot relax. Think of it like having a knot in the muscles in your neck or back after sleeping in a bad position, but in this case those knots and increased tension are in the pelvic floor muscles. Just like when you try to massage those knots out and it kind of cramps and hurts, people with pelvic floor dysfunction feel a similar cramping and painful sensation when trying to have sex. I just finished a rotation for pelvic physical therapy and just got hired to do pelvic physical therapy. I dealt with a couple patients with this issue daily. It’s not just from excessive kegels though. Pelvic floor muscle dysfunction can also be due to poor posture, holding urine or bowels back too long, stress, injury, and other causes.


Hunter_1955

He needs to get a little more experience with pussy. Perhaps then he will discover every pussy is different. There is nothing wrong with you. He’s the problem. A mature man would never say something like this to a woman.


[deleted]

He said your vagina is quite wide and that other girls he slept with were tighter? I'm so sorry. That's pretty fucked up, and I promise you it's not true. Just to get that out of the way


TransportationNo5560

You know, I heard those inflatable dolls are pretty tight


mmert138

It can be true. Just like penises, vaginas vary in size and shape. Some vaginas are indeed tighter than others. But complaining about this kind of a dick move. If she does not complain about your micro dick, don't complain about her gaping vagina.


zgtaf

I mean.. it might be true, right?


WellActuallyUmm

This. They do vary in size. I have been with women where I can’t even get it in to others where there is no resistance.


Informal-Run-63645

If he can get you to orgasm before piv, you'll be swollen from that and it might make it feel tighter. This can be done through, fingering, oral, or toy play, for example. Kegels might be something you want to do anyway, because they can make sex more enjoyable for you. Learning to control those muscles and how they feel can be very pleasurable for a woman. I think some women can even orgasm from practicing vaginal control. I would also agree with the other posters, I'm sure there's nothing wrong with your vagina. Just enjoy sex with your partner!


the_moog_hunter

Just not this partner. Drop him


Informal-Run-63645

Ultimately up to her, but I don't disagree.


Paradoxa77

> If he can get you to orgasm before piv, you'll be swollen from that and it might make it feel tighter. This can be done through, fingering, oral, or toy play, for example. I dunno, my partner is always tighter before than after orgasm.


mothermooseknuckle

He’s the problem. Not you.


Drinkyourwater99

Honey we don’t sleep with men who say these things to us. Get a new boyfriend. This one sucks. You’ll only learn this more and more with age. Please, trade him in for a better one.


Lurker_the_Pip

All anatomy is different. The same way all penis’s are different so are vaginas. Yes, some are more accommodating than others and at some time you will find a person who is a perfect puzzle piece for you. It may not be this guy.


Nervous_Zebra1918

Yikes on bikes. If someone complains about your vagina not being tight enough they don’t deserve in your vagina.


[deleted]

Ew. Please leave him.


xxochi1

YES!! 👏 ……next? Girl, you don’t need that kind of narcissism in your life….especially your sex life! ⚡️


AirInternational754

I wouldn’t be with someone who is not appreciative of getting laid. It’s hella rude and inconsiderate! He’s gotta go!


astoldbysomxx

Run!!!. You’re so young. Please don’t let men like this drag you down. Every vagina is different and good man wouldn’t give an f if he actually cared about you.


Littlewing1307

Oh wow he didn't need to say that! Personally, I love doing kegels when my man is inside me because it triggers my own orgasms and feels awesome. Pompoir is what it's called I believe. Something to explore if you're curious. But don't let him make you feel bad!!!


torontomanstyll123

what would be a good first way for a woman who has never done that before?


Littlewing1307

There is a pompoir sub to look at. Otherwise you can insert a finger or two and experiment to see which muscles are engaging.


boxen

Lets say you met a man who had only driven a car 3 times, and each time he crashed and totalled the car. You, on the other hand, have never driven before. Does he have "way more experience"? For all you know he had a couple of random one night stands, and each of the women was so monumentally disappointed that they were happy he never callrd again. All I'm saying is, just because someone says they are experienced doesn't mean they are, or that they learned angthing from those experiences. Judge them by how they treat you, not their random bragging. And, in my opinion, telling women they have a "wide vagina" is not something a sexually experienced man would do.


mmert138

I don't think he said anything to hurt you. Reading these comments treating him like he is a war criminal or something. He just said her vagina feels looser than others. This is like a girl saying "I have been with bigger guys." There is no problem in saying that. You make the problem. I mean, I personally wouldn't say anything like that to anyone. Even if my partner asks me "Is my vagina tight?" I'd just say yours is just perfect. I wouldn't lie to them saying theirs is the tightest because if they are asking this specfically, I am sure they have experienced some judgement in the past. If I say theirs is tight, I'll just be a liar in their eyes.


Ashamed_Health5102

The vagina doesn't get tighter for sex with kegles that's to exercise the pelvic floor especially after trauma like birth. They also help with blatter control after birth but they do feel good during sex. Or so I'm told! The vagina gets longer and loser when you're turned on. It's possible you get much more turned on than his other partners did. Do some googling and research this. You're possibly a different shape as well... Not much difference when comparing penises we all come in different shapes and sizes.


Magnetmonkey39

Gods I hate men some times what an absolute cunt that guy is 🤬


MBrother

Apparently no one wants to answer the OP's question! But hey, Kegels can help slightly, depending on the individual, how long they're done, and how intense they are.


murkymist

Next, it will be a push for anal because it's tighter. Another fine day at the manipulation station. It would be like you telling him you're disappointed that he doesn't have a bigger penis.


SireSweet

Short answer: yes. One of my flings did kegals. I still dream about that pussy to this day.


LittleSeizures7

kegels could prob help but should be approached as extra fun not a fix to a "problem"


SireSweet

Kegals are often told by doctors for women who just given birth. Bladder control, strengthening the pelvic floor and to heal faster after birth.


RaptorChaser

I use kegal exercises to orgasm and every guy says I'm the tightest he's been with.


Mrcreamherpie

Some women are just built like that, I've met women with really shallow vaginas that I can go about halfway in. Kegels will only help so much, I honestly think there's a reason theres different sizes of dicks or vaginas. I obviously had to find a woman with a deeper and wider set vagina cause after so long it does cause issues...


shadowwolf892

Can kegels make you "tighter"? Yesish. It's felt because when your pelvic floor muscles contact and pulse during sex, you end up gripping and squeezing down on whatever is inside you. Is it required for good sex? Absolutely not. However I will say that there are some very good health benefits to having strong pelvic floor muscles.


7ackSeven

Maybe he's too small?


Sensitive-Regular505

Even if 🤷🏼‍♀️ as i said - i don‘t care. I think its more like a him problem


louxxion

Does he make other comments criticizing you or belittling your achievements? The first thing I thought was that he’s negging you.


iamloveyouarelove

This is one of the best responses I've seen and it's frustrating to see it downvoted. You're not assuming, but you are asking a question and that's important. Hearing what the OP wrote, it did make me think about negging, but you need to look at the overall pattern of behavior. Some guys just say things that may come across badly because they're socially awkward or genuinely clueless. Others are actively trying to manipulate you through negging, which is really creepy. Usually it's not hard to tell these apart by looking at their whole pattern of behavior. Don't drop an otherwise good partner just because they slipped up and said something insensitive by accident. But if someone is negging you, that's a huge red flag and you need to get out of there ASAP. Comments like this can be either but it's easy to tell if you look at the total pattern of behavior. Like what context did he make this comment in? Did he say it in response to what the OP asked, or was it totally unsolicited? Has he said other stuff that seems to put you down or be like a backhanded compliment?


louxxion

Thank you for validating what I said. I appreciate it.


bookock

You’re 22 ….. he’s a waste of time


USATyrantHunter

Dont listen to these people claiming its not true. Definitely true 100%. What makes a guy an asshole with this is his approach. Which he hasn’t done anything wrong. Kegels can give you super powers! Check out yoni eggs


draven-james_24

Yes doing Kegels absolutely keeps the Vaginal muscles very toned and tight, my lovely EX Lady did them quite regularly for many years and she would literally push me out😬 of her most times when she would have an extremely intense🤯 Orgasm💦 happening. So yeah it certainly became a bit of a challenge in counteracting lol as those moments arrived 😉


AKA_June_Monroe

Maybe he uses his hand too much? He can go f*** himself!


jayghan

Kegels can actually be damaging to your pelvic floor health causing issues with urination and future penetrative sex.


leon581

Why are everyone so mad?


brattyginger83

I was with a man SEVERAL years ago for many many years. One time we were intimate and afterwards he was angry saying he could feel that my vagina was different from another man being inside there. I was baffled. We lived together with his sister and his sisters husband. WHEN was I cheating?! A few days later he apologized saying he realized I had been suffering from sever constipation and that was probably why I felt different inside. I have no idea if that is a thing either, but at least he apologized... right!? 🤣😂🤣 I swear I am not making this shit up No, dude is a douch and doesn't deserve you. Find someone thats happy with you as opposed to someone interested in putting you down. I bet he's told others this


nahianchoudhury

Kegel exercises help with pelvic muscle control. In short, yes. The cool thing about a vagina is that any size can work for women if they can control this muscle at will.


i-wish-i-was-a-draco

I don’t think your guy has a lot of experience lmao , sounds like typical manipulative shit he would say to make you insecure


Filberrt

Kegel will not tighten your vagina; it will however exercise the muscles around your vagina. You should both have more control over the muscles and enjoy the involuntary contractions.


petitememer

>it will however exercise the muscles around your vagina Isn't that the same thing as tightening? I assumed that what people mean when they say "tight", strong muscles.


bombomb111

Honestly a tight vagina isn’t really a good sign. Tightness indicates tension, apprehension, and discomfort, maybe even pain. Maybe it’s erotic for the penetrator but it’s disregarding the (lack of) arousal in the penetratee.


TheFacetiousDeist

I belive kegels just make it easier to control muscle contractions.


FamousListen9

You’re probably just wetter. So he might able to just kinda wipe off his member occasionally. When things are very wet, we lose sensation because there isn’t much friction. But you can also use those kegel muscles during sex.


wood_worker72

This is your first sexual partner, I'm really hoping not its not your last because he has no idea how to communicate with a partner. Your vagina is your vagina and I assure you it's perfect. To comment on something that a person can not change is rude and unfeeling.


CargandoPiedras

I don't know if overall tighter but some people with a lot of v control can tighten and loose on demand and that's cool. Not at all indispensable though, just different.


ChesapeakeBaySailor

Guy here, Don’t be over-concerned about what he said. My sexual experiences has been the vagina is somewhat elastic. He should be appreciative to have you and the sexual opportunity.


OnTheEveOfWar

What the hell. Ditch this guy.


Steve_Rogers_1970

Of course your vagina is looser than his death grip. /s DTMFA


Vikingberserkertx

I’ve been with the same woman 20 years after 3 kids never had this problem , maybe he just has a small penis and is too embarrassed to say so. Just find positions that work for your anatomy.


OkLeg3090

There is a good possibility his penis is incredibly small and no matter what you do, it won't help. He's just saying what he says to make you feel like it's you. He knows you are not as experienced and he is taking advantage of that.


Yankee39pmr

Dump him. You're fine just the way you are


keepthefvith

He's probably lying and has death grip


Itzyislove

That's so insulting wth


BantumBane

What an idiot this guy is. He has no idea what he’s talking about


No_Poetry8972

Try other dicks and only you will know if hes right🙄


Friendly_Good_1784

Well can you squeeze him? Like stopping your pee? If not, that’s all it is. Do it during sex.


twinmama30

Maybe he just isn't hard enough


dgfu2727

I am a guy, but I would get rid of him… Who the hell says that to their girlfriend? I’ve been with many women, and never understood that statement


OliviaPooPoo

Ben Wa Balls…use them regularly for various intervals of time and different weights/sizes can help strengthen pelvic floor muscles


DenseSir8025

Kegels help strengthen the muscles that are used to contract so no but it will squeeze harder and when applied appropriately it can increase enjoyment


Immediate_Carry_8973

I couldn't really care if someone was tight or loose, as long I'm able to make the other person happy then that's all it matters for me.


TangerineLeading9856

To answer you main question kegels can strengthen the muscles in that area definitely though you can locate the muscle group by peeing and trying to stop the flow. Once you locate them you can practice them whenever you’re bored. Also girl I know you don’t have a lot of experience with this, but no man should be actively comparing your vagina like that, especially to your face (if he wants to think that in private then go ahead ig.) Also vagina “looseness” is completely normal, it just means your aroused which should generally be the aim of the game during sex. Like I’m gobsmacked he said that to you, that’s the equivalent of me sleeping with a guy and telling them their dicks small and that every other guy I’d been with was way bigger. Like it serves no purpose other than to make the other partner insecure or doubt themselves.


Cucasmasher

Man I would never say this It’s usually just the woman being very aroused but let me tell you in my 30+ years of being inside vaginas I have never once not enjoyed it lol


Colorless82

Yeah, kegels would help with tightness. Also if you just orgasm a lot. I've rarely done kegels by myself unless I'm masturbating or having sex and guys have said I'm tight. And yes I was very aroused and still tight without squeezing them. I'm used to having frequent orgasms and my vagina is trained like a body builder lol


Key-Pace7150

To be fair there are some vaginas that are definitely looser or wider than others. Kegels are worth a shot


rickie-ramjet

What you are looking for can be found under pelvic floor health. And while you are perfectly healthy… you can improve muscle tone there just like any other muscle… muscle control can contribute good things to all concerned. I had a partner who worked at this long before I met her- and when she contracted- I felt it.. it was fun for both of us. But there is nothing wrong with you. Frankly, he probably has been hammerfisted with himself- and cant feel anything subtle. He may have to layoff himself.


Xishou1

As someone who does pompoir, yes, they very very much do tighten you up. And also keeps you from pissing yourself every time you laugh or sneeze.


Icy-Discussion1515

There are definitely variations in the size of the vaginal opening. Some women can barely fit a finger while others can take a whole hand. Sometimes people are not compatible, size wise. Regardless, there's a lot more to sex than the physical. Sex is mostly in the mind. When you find someone you really connect with, you will have amazing sex that feels natural. It will transcend the false premise that you should or need to be good at sex or that you need to somehow improve your hardware. You will simply enjoy harmonious pleasure in that moment without any consideration for accomplishments or end goals. I don't know what kind of relationship you have outside the bedroom but if you have any doubts about being with this man, you will want to consider all of this in its totality. It's a shame, at your age especially, to lock yourself in a relationship where you're not having a ~positive sexual experience. If you end up staying with this guy long term, this could really end up biting you in the ass. Sexual frustration will easily erode a relationship and drive partners to do things that are not in the interest of the relationship. To answer your question without attacking your premise, yes, kegals can tighten your vagina. Regular exercise can as well.


strokemaster6000

Oh dammit. Yes of course he shouldn't say that and it is a partner problem and not a vagina problem but would for goodness sake someone please write an answer to the actual question? Edit: ok nevermind. I was frustrated after a few minutes of scrolling, wrote the comment and immediately saw some answers after. Turns out kegels might help but some say they don't


Successful_Bear8508

A women that is able to control her pelvic muscle won’t have that issue -> do you know the grip of cleopatra xD? I think both partners should invest in theirself for simply longevity and having a fun sex live


Asmalls3332

What a loser to say that to you. Sounds like he was trying to mess with your self esteem to make himself feel better. Also, levels help. Now I’m doing them lol hold 5-10sec 10 times


Asmalls3332

I’m sorry this was your first sexual experience. That just blows mind that someone would insult a woman like that knowing she’s experiencing sex for the first time.


BillSF

Kegels can help, yes. Supposedly can increase intensity of orgasms for both sexes so there's other reasons to give it a try than having a rude boyfriend. Also, it is probably not true that there is nothing to be done about it. The popular positions of missionary, doggy will keep you pretty open. Try some alternative positions. You can try the "prone bone" ( https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a46118002/prone-bone-sex-position/ ). Lay face down, (optionally put a small pillow under your hips). Have your legs closer to straight out, open them for him to penetrate you and then straighten your legs out. I think you'll be able to adjust the tightness based on how closely your legs are together. You might be able to try this face up too but you might need to adjust.. I recall the geometry making it a bit harder to thrust. You can also try you on top. If you writhe your hips forward and back you might be able to get a nice tightness. I can usually hold out as long as I want, but sometimes my girlfriend does something like this when on top and there's no holding back.


bluntman7exe

Kegels will help with that. Better trained muscles will give the vagina a more pleasurable grip during sex. And it’s hard to find the right words for it when trying to communicate that with a girl during or after sex. I’ve been guilty of saying something like “could you make it more tight so i can feel more?” When really i could have said “It might feel a bit more intense if you could squeeze it more with your pussy”. Communication isn’t always easy or intuitive.


Slyvan25

Tells more about him and the other woman 🤣 most guys that tell you that the vagina needs to be tight from previous experiences are guys that couldn't arouse those woman


Valrath_84

Dude why would he say that Jesus


NoBoysenberry257

If he was your 100th partner it wouldn't matter. You need to learn NOW that this kind of behavior isn't tolerated. You're dating a child. Know your worth


jsgo9

every pussy is diferent, I knew girls with low sexual life with wide vag, and escorts with tight pussy


likestocuddleandmore

Wow, rude. Any relationship that requires fitness exercises to maintain it os going to be no go longterm. And overtime, if not right away, you will feel resentment for having to do it just because of his words


PoliceRobots

In 1 million years, I would never think of commenting on my partners body, unless it was a compliment. Seriously ladies, where do you find these fucking guys? Why do you fuck them? Put them straight to jail and be done with them. There are plenty of guys that would worship your body.


kaan_kaant

If anyone told me that my dick was too small I’d be hurt and have to leave them. This is just as bad and unacceptable. Get rid of him. He is the type of dude who is already on the prowl anyways. I wouldn’t want to hurt someone I actually cared about……..


stunninghotwife

A pussy will relax when the woman is aroused. Maybe you're actually turned on by him and that's not what he's used to!


[deleted]

The guy I lost my virginity to told me my V is tight because i was a virgin. I was so icked by that I mean I didn’t loose it that long ago but I’m still grown and felt like it was so fetish-y to say that


whizzkidd

I (and many many other men) prefer relaxed 😺's


DraceSylvanian

I mean my fiance felt pretty loose for a long time. I thought it was a bit odd, and when I finally brought it up, she learned that she had a terrible relationship of mind to muscles, and learned that she can actually pay attention to her muscles and. She went from the least tight girl I've been with to one of the best.


hydro908

Yes it’s definitely a thing , doing squats or leg exercises helps


OooJackyBlue

Yes, and men greater blood flow to the P. 🚀


Aircraftman2022

Guy is definitely not exoerienced in sex snd zero in communicating on vaginas being too tight or loose.


AstoundingQuasar

Smh how toxic. I feel like my knee jerk response would have been “well I guess I’m just used to bigger dicks”….


OneDemonette

Honestly, he should take it as a compliment, the more comfortable a woman is with her partner, the looser she becomes. Kegels might help, but you should think less when having sex! I have been told when I think and focus on it, I'm not as tight!


pleasehelpnull

he definitely is used to women that aren’t turned on whatsoever not surprised why .


jss1234

Absolute nonsense. Don't feel bad about it. He is being completely insensitive to you. Are you sure he is very experienced or did he tell you that? Even if that's true I've been with women of all sizes and have never experienced that. As you're inexperienced you would have no idea if he is very small or very inexperienced himself. Either way he should never have told you that. Can you imagine how he'd feel if you told him he is small? What he said to you is hurtful and rude. Lots of red flags!


[deleted]

If you are concerned, talk to your gyno.  There are massage/physio routines for pelvic floor strengthening, if it is infact an issue.  That doesn't mean that you are less valuable or your vagina is "worse", but weak pelvic floor muscles can be for any number of reasons.  For my current partner, I've been asked to massage the muscles inside in a few specific spots after intercourse (she even took me to the clinic where the therapist had me feel around inside her for the specific muscles to massage, which was interesting...)


MeatyMagnus

Don't think there are any other reasons to do Kegels.


dirtygirl710

Absolutely yes done enough


p00psicle151590

Who the fuck says this to someone about their genitals? Anyone who says something like this isn't worth fucking.


OkDifference5636

Dump him. He doesn’t appreciate you.


cccque

Wtaf? Sounds like he has a problem. What a tool.


Crom-vascular

That's a very dumb comment to make. You should post it on dumb bfs or something.


sextypethang

Tell him his dick is too thin


BendyFriendy

Find a man with a thicker dick. He's an idiot.


Extreme_Lynx_3588

Tell him that you're not wide at all, he just has a tiny ding dong.


marielynn24

Maybe if his dick wasn’t so thin??


dillweed67818

Yes, and no. It will make you somewhat tighter. However relaxed muscle state may not change, and muscle elasticity will not change (your ability to stretch to take larger objects). Through doing daily Kegals many women can get to a point that they can push their partner out of them. Maybe he has a small dick? Just curious, are you taller than him or his previous girlfriends?


DrPsychi

This is a really bad thing to say to your partner and really fucked up. For your question, kegels do help with "feeling" tighter when you contract those muscles. They also help with other problems like uterine prolapse. Tho don't do it excessively for reasons others stated.


__MischiefManaged__

Lol maybe he should worry about increasing his dick size?! The audacity of these boys complaining about shit like this


sdrake14

Maybe he’s too small???


Equal-Significance86

Reply most cocks I’ve had are bigger…


Ok-Sink8437

Find a better boyfriend with a bigger dick. Theres nothing wrong with you.


ThrowRAconfusedpain

How about you get a new sex partner? Too wide? Just means the other women he slept with likely weren’t turned on. The vagina expands and lubricates when aroused. The walls help the penis glide. Certain positions for small penis partners can sometimes help with sensations but this guys a dick. #you know what would help? A new sex partner God forbid any woman has kids with this man


[deleted]

Kegels are for women who have had kids


Correct-Watercress91

Maybe see r/pompoir for suggestions.


barely_eighteen

Maybe he is projecting because he's too small for a vagina that's a normal size? Nothing against guys with small dicks but stop projecting your problems on to other people lol especially if your gf is having sex for the first time and you set the bar by being shit to her


neverknowwhatsnext

Find a man who is more sexually compatible.


I-LoyLoy

Genetically no. You could also try a new boyfriend who isn't a dick.


Lower_Lab_7414

Damn girl How to get that self esteem


popocatepti

run girl haha find someone else


woahbrad35

Kegels might help a bit, but it's probably just a lot of natural lubrication going on or maybe he's got a small dick. Either way, he sounds like a crappy person


Elbcko

Could you imagine if a woman said “hey my passed sexual partners filled me up better than you” Come on guys.


rogerbonus

Just as dicks come in various sizes so do vjs. And smaller guys will prefer tighter vjs. If you have a choad pretty much any vj will feel tight. While there isn't much that dudes can do about shlong size, kegels can indeed tighten your vj (when you use them).


skeletowns

begging you to leave him OP who tf says something like that to their partner .........


Revolutionary_Hand77

No. This guy is incompatible with you. Vaginas (like dicks) come in different sizes. I'm assuming he's not educated in basic biology, rather than an asshole.


M1ssi0ner

Tell him if he wants it tighter he must get a bigger"D". Kegels will help strengthen the pelvic floor muscles which can help you feel tighter when he's balls deep, they will do nothing about the size of your vagina, length, breadth or width wise. Just like cocks come in many different flavours, variations and sizes, vaginas are the same. I am sorry that your cock has a total dick attached to it, if I was you I'd start looking for a non-dick, bonus points if he has a nice cock and knows how to work it.


jrgman42

Someone more knowledgeable can correct me, but it doesn’t “tighten” anything overall…it just gives you more control. If you clinch down during sex, no man can withstand that for long. Having said that…ditch that guy. That sounds like some type of negging bullshit. I would never say that to my partner. Suggest to him that maybe he needs a smaller condom. Keep up the comments about his little peen and let him develop a complex.