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It can have various different factors such as the material the dildo was made from the firmness or softness of it
They have glass dildos, cyber skin, rubber there's a lot of them maybe you just got the wrong type.
Or maybe you just don't enjoy penetration or penetration from artificial source but no matter what it is I do not feel that there is something wrong with you simply because you do not enjoy a dildo.
Exactly…There’s no right or wrong. If it’s not this maybe it’s that. Try things and find what you like. Half the fun is finding what you like, the rest of the fun is doing that thing a lot.
This is excellent. I have had a lot of sex toys over the years, including dildos of just about every kind. I find glass to be very uncomfortable, and some silicone is too stiff (yes, I said it). It takes time to find the size and shape that will feel best. Also, it helps to understand that a lot of what you see online is fake. Some women in the videos are intentionally putting on a show for the guys. Very few women actually orgasm from penetration alone.
But, you're on the right path. Experiment, try new things...own your own pleasure.
All this. And also it could be the angle. It's possible that you're just not getting the right angle to enjoy it as much since most dildos are harder than penis and it doesn't bend as easily.
Penetrative sex you get to enjoy a whole person, not just their penis. There’s kissing, other excitement, dirty talk. It’s very different from using a toy alone.
When you used it, were you already very aroused and wet before you tried?
IME penetration in an unaroused vagina usually feels either like nothing, or is painful. Early arousal creates self lubrication, but later arousal is when the vaginal muscles relax and expand to accommodate penetration.
I usually try to come once from clit stimulation before working up to fingers and then a dildo.
This is 🔑. It isn’t going to feel good if you just lube it up and go to town. Bring aroused prior to taking it for a spin will make a lot of difference. Of course , all of the other things that have been mentioned too, but it’s worth trying it if you’re really turned on and wet, it’s a different sensation from just trying it out to see how it is without any prior self foreplay.
i gotta have something real. anything else is just a material object and it doesnt register the same. maybe bullets. shrug. its not for everyone. its not for me!
Penetrative sex does not feel the same at all to me. Dildos do nothing and honestly don’t feel like much to me. Penetrative sex is great but for anything by myself I need a vibrator.
> People always look like they enjoy dildos and penetration
The porn wouldn't sell if they were like, "I don't actually get anything from this. It's just kind of uncomfortable." Not everyone is going to like every toy or activity, just as not everybody has the same taste in food, music, movies, etc. Some people love dildos. Others don't.
It's completely normal. Not many women organsm from penetrative sex alone in comparison to clitoral stimulation.
Also, what doesn't work today might work in 6 months time. Or however long. Or never. There's really no wrong answer and nothing wrong with your recent experience.
Exactly. I stopped enjoying "artificial" penetration in my early 20s - three DECADES later - suddenly it started working for me - big time! Lol. So different, person to person and time to time. Don't worry about it.
Some dildoes just don't hit the right spots. Explore what you want, be it gspot, vaginal, clitotoral, cervical, anal etc, and buy one for that purpose.
Specialized dildoes > general dildoes always.
And if you have the cash, try to buy from more deluxe brands.
But maybe you just don't like penetrative masturbation? That's okay too!
For me, it's the feeling of getting 'filled up'. Squirting dildoes does a great job with this.
Penetration on its own doesnt do much for ne either even though a crave it when im horny. I get the most pleasure from fingers rather than dildos or even a penis sometimes. I think it is probably because fingers can more easily stimulate the g spot but still need some clit stim to actually orgasm.
You might also enjoy a different size, shape, material.... or maybe its just not your favorite thing and if it isnt then oh well dont buy more dildos haha.
Sometimes dildos aren’t for everyone and that’s totally okay! Depending on what you bought depends on the hardness/firmness of it. If it’s a firmer one your body may not like it because it has no give.
Toys and sex do feel different to eachother. With a dildo you’re in control of it and honestly sometimes it doesn’t feel as good. But also when you’re having sex with someone you aren’t just focusing on the penetration you’re focusing on the whole experience.
Something that may help is using a vibrator to have an orgasm first. It can help relax your body. Then try the dildo. If that doesn’t work maybe get a different one?
Goodluck!
My husband and I have a bunch of toys, that's only for me.
Fact is, that I never use any of them on myself. I just don't like it! It doesn't feel good to me, it just doesn't.
But when he uses one of them on me; totally different story. I don't know why that is!
But using one on myself is just... No!
It could be the material, the size, you not being in the right mind space for it or that you just didn't enjoy it because it was the first time.
Penetrative sex can also feel a million different ways, not everyone enjoys it and it can take practice to really start to enjoy it. Also sex with another person can feel even better because it's a person and not an object so it does feel different in both physical and emotional ways
There are so many different kinds of dildos out there, I find the harder rubber ones to be very uncomfortable, but the real skin ones are absolutely amazing. I'd recommend you go check out Pink Cherry and look at their real skin dildos, they usually have a sale on too. They've got a US specific store and a Canada Specific store so just make sure you're on the right website lol
Size can also be a big factor, if it's too large any dildo will cause discomfort, try getting one that's a bit smaller and made of a softer material, that should help a lot
To me, dildos feel nothing like real penetrative sex. I have tried silicone dildos, and they feel so weird compared to a real penis. I have to use a ton of lube because the silicone by itself does not feel good, and I have to be really aroused for it to feel like anything at all.
You have to use a dildo when you’re already aroused and have that “I want to be filled up” feeling. If you just start using it before you’re aroused it won’t do anything!
I really dislike dildos despite having tried a few different ones. But I love PiV. It’s a very different sensation, in my opinion. No matter the material of the dildo, it isn’t malleable and doesn’t adjust to your body the way a penis does. So my advice is don’t sweat it! Dildos may not be for you but that says nothing about your ability to enjoy penetrative sex.
Some of them are just terrible 🤷 texture, material, length, girth, shape... those all matter. Nobody really knows what they like until they find it when it comes to toys.
I agree with the other people here, it’s not likely to feel good unless you’re already aroused and relaxed about the whole thing. And even then there’s no guarantee.
How old are you? It’s possible it will be more comfortable at a later age/after you have more experience with sex and masturbation.
Also, how big/wide is the dildo? You might need a smaller one or just use a finger instead.
I thoroughly enjoy penetration lol but not by itself I need both clitoral stimulation & penetration. The material the dildo is made out of is important. I’ve used silicone & hated it, I use glass now & no issues, easier to clean imo cause I can just boil it
As someone else said, it depends a lot on the material. I personally can't stand glass or metal insertables (besides butt plugs), because they have no give whatsoever. They feel uncomfortable and almost medical or something. I only use silicone. It's okay if a toy has a firm, inflexible core, but it needs a significant layer of softer material on the outside to feel comfortable to me. You should try a different material.
Also, it sounds like you haven't experienced penetration before, so you might need something smaller.
There's many factors to consider, but first things first consider that it may take time to get used to it. Especially if you've gotten very used to clitoral stimulation. Go slow and try it without your vibrator, maybe warming up with fingers or smaller toys.
Just focus on the sensations and take trying to orgasm off the table so you can just relax.
Personally I like the ones with the balls attached because I flip that bad boi over and use it to stimulate my clit. That’s the only way I can get off and enjoy dildos otherwise it’s vibrators
Were you ready for it before you put it in? Did you tease yourself by playing with yourself first? Foreplay? If you weren't ready, and just put it in and just used lube, you're just being mechanical. You have to love your body and touch everywhere, make yourself so horny that you need that dildo in you.
Try that and if you're still feel nothing a visit to the ob/gyn maybe necessary. Good luck.
I promise you that finding the right dildo is like trying every spice in the supermarket. What didn’t feel good about it? Different girths, glans and all sorts can change how it feels
I love penetrative sex but I do not enjoy dildos. Nothing feels as good as the real thing to me, personally. I know what you mean about seeing others get so much enjoyment from them, and I used to think something was wrong with me, too. I even tried a rabbit. I hated it lol. I just love a basic vibrator/wand for my personal pleasure.
Hey, I am not a fan of dildo’s for orgasming. Honestly, it has never worked. I like vibrating so I use that. There are plenty of toys that vibrate on your clit and also go in your vagina. There is nothing to be ashamed about :)
To be honest me neither unless someone else is controlling it ! I don’t like sticking anything up there at all tbh. It just doesn’t feel that good. Sex does tho, and if someone is using a dildo on me I like it. Not sure why but we are definitely still normal ! I’m always surprised when girls have a huge dildo collection
In thia country we can return for another product got orgasm guarantee. One time i delivered a product 3 times on same buy, shuffle products with spouse. It was nice.
I got a silicone dildo once and i was so excited i even got it as the same size as my bf and everything but when i got it, allllll i could feel were the cheap oversized "veins" they tried to replicate. Ewewew it felt so gross immediately thrown away lol
> People always look like they enjoy dildos and penetration, but it didn’t feel right to me.
Many cam girls masturbate with dildos for the same reason you see women in porn losing their minds while a guy jackhammers away: to satisfy the typical straight male fantasy of women desperately craving penetration. Believe it or not, it’s more fantasy than reality: only a minority of women get substantial pleasure from penetration, and even fewer can climax that way.
Toss the dildo and don’t look back! And don’t be shy about telling your partners what feels good for you - many will have misconceptions.
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
It can have various different factors such as the material the dildo was made from the firmness or softness of it They have glass dildos, cyber skin, rubber there's a lot of them maybe you just got the wrong type. Or maybe you just don't enjoy penetration or penetration from artificial source but no matter what it is I do not feel that there is something wrong with you simply because you do not enjoy a dildo.
This is a really good response.
Exactly…There’s no right or wrong. If it’s not this maybe it’s that. Try things and find what you like. Half the fun is finding what you like, the rest of the fun is doing that thing a lot.
Great response! Besides different materials, dils come in a variety of sizes. Might be too big? Wrong angle? All are factors
This is excellent. I have had a lot of sex toys over the years, including dildos of just about every kind. I find glass to be very uncomfortable, and some silicone is too stiff (yes, I said it). It takes time to find the size and shape that will feel best. Also, it helps to understand that a lot of what you see online is fake. Some women in the videos are intentionally putting on a show for the guys. Very few women actually orgasm from penetration alone. But, you're on the right path. Experiment, try new things...own your own pleasure.
All this. And also it could be the angle. It's possible that you're just not getting the right angle to enjoy it as much since most dildos are harder than penis and it doesn't bend as easily.
Penetrative sex you get to enjoy a whole person, not just their penis. There’s kissing, other excitement, dirty talk. It’s very different from using a toy alone.
When you used it, were you already very aroused and wet before you tried? IME penetration in an unaroused vagina usually feels either like nothing, or is painful. Early arousal creates self lubrication, but later arousal is when the vaginal muscles relax and expand to accommodate penetration. I usually try to come once from clit stimulation before working up to fingers and then a dildo.
This is 🔑. It isn’t going to feel good if you just lube it up and go to town. Bring aroused prior to taking it for a spin will make a lot of difference. Of course , all of the other things that have been mentioned too, but it’s worth trying it if you’re really turned on and wet, it’s a different sensation from just trying it out to see how it is without any prior self foreplay.
This….if you don’t want it, REALLY want it, it feels like nothing lol.
i gotta have something real. anything else is just a material object and it doesnt register the same. maybe bullets. shrug. its not for everyone. its not for me!
Dildos do nothing for me when I’m masturbating. Some vibration is a must
Penetrative sex does not feel the same at all to me. Dildos do nothing and honestly don’t feel like much to me. Penetrative sex is great but for anything by myself I need a vibrator.
> People always look like they enjoy dildos and penetration The porn wouldn't sell if they were like, "I don't actually get anything from this. It's just kind of uncomfortable." Not everyone is going to like every toy or activity, just as not everybody has the same taste in food, music, movies, etc. Some people love dildos. Others don't.
It's completely normal. Not many women organsm from penetrative sex alone in comparison to clitoral stimulation. Also, what doesn't work today might work in 6 months time. Or however long. Or never. There's really no wrong answer and nothing wrong with your recent experience.
Exactly. I stopped enjoying "artificial" penetration in my early 20s - three DECADES later - suddenly it started working for me - big time! Lol. So different, person to person and time to time. Don't worry about it.
Some dildoes just don't hit the right spots. Explore what you want, be it gspot, vaginal, clitotoral, cervical, anal etc, and buy one for that purpose. Specialized dildoes > general dildoes always. And if you have the cash, try to buy from more deluxe brands. But maybe you just don't like penetrative masturbation? That's okay too! For me, it's the feeling of getting 'filled up'. Squirting dildoes does a great job with this.
Penetration on its own doesnt do much for ne either even though a crave it when im horny. I get the most pleasure from fingers rather than dildos or even a penis sometimes. I think it is probably because fingers can more easily stimulate the g spot but still need some clit stim to actually orgasm. You might also enjoy a different size, shape, material.... or maybe its just not your favorite thing and if it isnt then oh well dont buy more dildos haha.
I rarely like using dildos, but I love penetrative sex. It dosent feel the same at all
My girlfriend just said the same thing to me.
Sometimes dildos aren’t for everyone and that’s totally okay! Depending on what you bought depends on the hardness/firmness of it. If it’s a firmer one your body may not like it because it has no give. Toys and sex do feel different to eachother. With a dildo you’re in control of it and honestly sometimes it doesn’t feel as good. But also when you’re having sex with someone you aren’t just focusing on the penetration you’re focusing on the whole experience. Something that may help is using a vibrator to have an orgasm first. It can help relax your body. Then try the dildo. If that doesn’t work maybe get a different one? Goodluck!
My husband and I have a bunch of toys, that's only for me. Fact is, that I never use any of them on myself. I just don't like it! It doesn't feel good to me, it just doesn't. But when he uses one of them on me; totally different story. I don't know why that is! But using one on myself is just... No!
Get a rabbit or something else with clitoral stimulation.
It could be the material, the size, you not being in the right mind space for it or that you just didn't enjoy it because it was the first time. Penetrative sex can also feel a million different ways, not everyone enjoys it and it can take practice to really start to enjoy it. Also sex with another person can feel even better because it's a person and not an object so it does feel different in both physical and emotional ways
There are so many different kinds of dildos out there, I find the harder rubber ones to be very uncomfortable, but the real skin ones are absolutely amazing. I'd recommend you go check out Pink Cherry and look at their real skin dildos, they usually have a sale on too. They've got a US specific store and a Canada Specific store so just make sure you're on the right website lol Size can also be a big factor, if it's too large any dildo will cause discomfort, try getting one that's a bit smaller and made of a softer material, that should help a lot
I cannot get off from a dildo... I bought a vibrator that you insert, and it also has clit suction. Game changer!!!
I have never thought a dildo can hold a candle to real penetrative sex. Penetrative sex is my favorite, and my dildos mostly just sit in a drawer.
Can try warming it up to feel more natural
personally dildos feel way worse then the real thing, usually too firm for me you should try something smaller/softer
To me, dildos feel nothing like real penetrative sex. I have tried silicone dildos, and they feel so weird compared to a real penis. I have to use a ton of lube because the silicone by itself does not feel good, and I have to be really aroused for it to feel like anything at all.
You have to use a dildo when you’re already aroused and have that “I want to be filled up” feeling. If you just start using it before you’re aroused it won’t do anything!
All my girlfriends loved vibrators. Made them go wild
There are different densities (firmness =called shore hardness scale). You may want a softer one or a textured or curved one.
I really dislike dildos despite having tried a few different ones. But I love PiV. It’s a very different sensation, in my opinion. No matter the material of the dildo, it isn’t malleable and doesn’t adjust to your body the way a penis does. So my advice is don’t sweat it! Dildos may not be for you but that says nothing about your ability to enjoy penetrative sex.
Some of them are just terrible 🤷 texture, material, length, girth, shape... those all matter. Nobody really knows what they like until they find it when it comes to toys.
[удалено]
It felt uncomfortable
I agree with the other people here, it’s not likely to feel good unless you’re already aroused and relaxed about the whole thing. And even then there’s no guarantee. How old are you? It’s possible it will be more comfortable at a later age/after you have more experience with sex and masturbation. Also, how big/wide is the dildo? You might need a smaller one or just use a finger instead.
I thoroughly enjoy penetration lol but not by itself I need both clitoral stimulation & penetration. The material the dildo is made out of is important. I’ve used silicone & hated it, I use glass now & no issues, easier to clean imo cause I can just boil it
As someone else said, it depends a lot on the material. I personally can't stand glass or metal insertables (besides butt plugs), because they have no give whatsoever. They feel uncomfortable and almost medical or something. I only use silicone. It's okay if a toy has a firm, inflexible core, but it needs a significant layer of softer material on the outside to feel comfortable to me. You should try a different material. Also, it sounds like you haven't experienced penetration before, so you might need something smaller.
There's many factors to consider, but first things first consider that it may take time to get used to it. Especially if you've gotten very used to clitoral stimulation. Go slow and try it without your vibrator, maybe warming up with fingers or smaller toys. Just focus on the sensations and take trying to orgasm off the table so you can just relax.
Nope. You might be a clit type of person and don't really like penetration. I don't like dildo either.
I've never found one that felt right to me. You're not alone.
Personally I like the ones with the balls attached because I flip that bad boi over and use it to stimulate my clit. That’s the only way I can get off and enjoy dildos otherwise it’s vibrators
Were you ready for it before you put it in? Did you tease yourself by playing with yourself first? Foreplay? If you weren't ready, and just put it in and just used lube, you're just being mechanical. You have to love your body and touch everywhere, make yourself so horny that you need that dildo in you. Try that and if you're still feel nothing a visit to the ob/gyn maybe necessary. Good luck.
I promise you that finding the right dildo is like trying every spice in the supermarket. What didn’t feel good about it? Different girths, glans and all sorts can change how it feels
Former gf like to insert a doldo, fuck herself as she rubbed her clit, got off. Dildo alone wasn't that great.
Penetration from a dildo is not anywhere as good as the real thing.
I love penetrative sex but I do not enjoy dildos. Nothing feels as good as the real thing to me, personally. I know what you mean about seeing others get so much enjoyment from them, and I used to think something was wrong with me, too. I even tried a rabbit. I hated it lol. I just love a basic vibrator/wand for my personal pleasure.
Hey, I am not a fan of dildo’s for orgasming. Honestly, it has never worked. I like vibrating so I use that. There are plenty of toys that vibrate on your clit and also go in your vagina. There is nothing to be ashamed about :)
My girlfriend prefers my penis over her dildo. The real thing is always better than anything that’s man-made.
To be honest me neither unless someone else is controlling it ! I don’t like sticking anything up there at all tbh. It just doesn’t feel that good. Sex does tho, and if someone is using a dildo on me I like it. Not sure why but we are definitely still normal ! I’m always surprised when girls have a huge dildo collection
In thia country we can return for another product got orgasm guarantee. One time i delivered a product 3 times on same buy, shuffle products with spouse. It was nice.
I got a silicone dildo once and i was so excited i even got it as the same size as my bf and everything but when i got it, allllll i could feel were the cheap oversized "veins" they tried to replicate. Ewewew it felt so gross immediately thrown away lol
I don’t normally use a dildo to masturbate unless I’m using a rabbit-style vibrator.
Did you hawk tuah! spit in that thang?
Try one with “monster, hulk, alien, tentacles, giant, beast”. Should be the size of Arnold Schwarzenegger’s forearm.
> People always look like they enjoy dildos and penetration, but it didn’t feel right to me. Many cam girls masturbate with dildos for the same reason you see women in porn losing their minds while a guy jackhammers away: to satisfy the typical straight male fantasy of women desperately craving penetration. Believe it or not, it’s more fantasy than reality: only a minority of women get substantial pleasure from penetration, and even fewer can climax that way. Toss the dildo and don’t look back! And don’t be shy about telling your partners what feels good for you - many will have misconceptions.