I say this as a married man:
You don't owe anyone anything but you'd be doing a favor to the women who date him after you dump him if you put your foot down and tell him vomiting during sex is not normal.
If you don't want to do it, don't do it. If he keeps pushing it, it's time to dump him and move on.
Fuck yes!!! This right here. My husband has more experience than me and not ONCE has he pushed me into or had to convince me of something. Nah, don’t even wait to get rid of this dude, listen to the married guy, vomiting should not and is not a normal occurrence during sex.
This is a lil sketchy. You also said “he convinced me to have sex” if you do love this guy you need to communicate with him. If your not at his level thats ok but you could have a better experience if you didn’t just let him use you. Idk I’m getting a very small part of the sitch. I’d never do something a lady wasn’t comfortable with. Also you don’t need to be expected to do any of that stuff….
You don't have to like everything in bed! It's good to try things (but not by being talked into it like your boyfriend is doing here), but after you try them it's ok and normal to say "not my thing, not doing that again".
You don't like it. It didn't feel good for you and you didn't feel safe. You can say no the next time he asks for this.
And can I just say, comparing you to his ex sucks and needs to stop. Does he mention her as a way to make you feel insecure to make you do things?
It's amazing how many guys truly believe that real sex should be exactly like porn sex. The absolute best sex is when both of you feel comfortabl, close, and satisfied. The one sided acts can be fun every once in a while if they're reciprocated but they aren't the greatest part of sex.
he is pressurizing you into doing this, he tells you he coerced his ex into doing this when she didn't enjoy it. This is a huge red flag. you don't like this he should be stopping from even asking. Tell him to stop asking and if he does it again leave and block him. He does not understand boundaries and that is dangerous and definitely not sexy.
You do wonder what his reaction would be if he were to experiment with someone face fucking him with a dildo that mimics his size.
I'd advise you also to try fucking his face.
I hope he'll appreciate the experience of pleasing you too.
(PS - I say this as someone eager to please. YMMV.)
My thought is that your boyfriend is exhibiting clear signs of red flags in your relationship. Him "convincing" you to have sex is not a great start - ANYTHING sexual that you do should not only be consensual but enthusiastic. If you weren't ready, he should not have pressured you at all.
Same thing goes for trying out his kinks. While I applaud you for being open to trying new things out, you should ALWAYS feel confident to say no if you are not comfortable with things, and not be pressured into doing things you either don't want to try or have tried and didn't like.
Face fucking is not something that everyone is comfortable with, can lead to pain in the throat; there are posts on here where people complain about pain days after the event.
You don't say how the rest of your relationship is, but be confident, speak up, and don't be pressured into these things ... no relationship is worth that.
Fucking christ these men fucking suck. Pardon my language. I'm gonna ban myself I can't read these anymore, makes me sad to be one.
Edit: I feel bad I offered no advice. Say no if you're uncomfortable. Making someone throw up during sex is not ok...wtf I mean if you enjoy it that's one thing but don't be abused for someones pleasure. There are better men.
> I made him stop because i felt like I would vomit even though he said vomiting is normal.
Bleeding is normal if someone stabs you. “Normal” is not synonymous with “good”.
> I don't want to know that his ex was better than me at something.
I don’t know if “tolerating vomiting” counts as a skill but almost anything is possible with practice.
Grab a 9” long, 4” thick dildo. Have your boyfriend lay down and shove it repeated and violently down his throat. As you well know, you can’t breath with a dick down your throat. Let him become deeply intimate with air hunger.
I like being face fucked. But you don’t. End of fucking story.
Assuming 4” thick means girth(circumference) and a good training size.
Because a 4” wide dildo won’t get past anyone’s molars even with a massive mouth.
We do a lot of FF with my bf (I’m female), I’m the one asking for it most of the time. However, he never, ever went deep enough to make me uncomfortable, or asked for it. Like it’s more about the penis tip + a bit more? It’s like this naughty idea of it that I like, so there. And, also, vomiting is def not ‘normal’, I felt sick reading this :(
Yeah, thank you for this perspective. I’m a man, and I (and my SO) absolutely love FF. But Jesus, I’m careful not to make my partner gag, let alone puke. Jesus.
That’s correct. I love receiving oral, and she loves giving it. FF allows for me to have more control. But, much like when she’s giving me a blowjob, gaging is rare and puking is non existent.
It’s fine for him to have kinks and want to intorduce them too you and ask you to try them. But…
> I made him stop because i felt like I would vomit even though he said vomiting is normal. He also told me his ex didn’t like it at first but after you do it a lot it gets easier which made me feel horrible.
Red flag parade right there. Vomiting may be something that happens accidentally during face fucking. It’s generally something that is avoided, but *might* happen. It sounds like he doesn’t want to face fuck you. He wants to make you puke on his dick. That is a big step beyond just facefucking and is into some extreme bdsm territory. That isn’t somewhere you just take an inexperienced partner without detailed conversations, baby steps, **and most importantly making sure said partner is really into and enjoying this**. He is basically pushing you into his extreme kinks and disregarding your comfort.
With this kink, a good, ethical partner would discuss the kink with you and then ease into over time, while checking in to make sure you are comfortable with everything and are enjoying yourself. He’s just using you and taking a “fuck your feelings” approach.
The icing on this shit cake is that he is then manipulating you into doing these things by comparing you to his ex.
He is trying to act out shit he has seen in extreme porn. Very few people actually enjoy what he wants you to do. Fucking run. This guy is sick. I say this as someone that has some extreme kinks. An ethical person would never act the way he is acting. He is manipulating you and abusing you.
Edit: I also see your other post about your boyfriend watching porn that features women in pain. And it sounds like he coerced you into losing your virginity to him. Jesus Christ. Please get away from this guy. He is pushing a very distorted view of sex on you.
Basic face fucking no, definitely not beginner face fucking, but the more extreme methods (with experienced playmates) can lead to it. So normal isn't quite wrong, but definitely not completely right.
If you don't like it, don't do it.
If you want to be able to do it, try deepthroating him first. A setting where you are in control of how fast, rough and deep it goes.
Over a while you indeed get "better" at it but simply just going straight to facefucking is insane.
If vomiting or near vomiting is happening, that would be a full stop.
Tell him you don’t enjoy it. It he continues to try to convince you, tell him you will try it again if he lets you face fuck him several times with a big strap-on.
You don't. This is a thing that some people enjoy. It's degrading, painful, and can be frightening. If you don't enjoy feeling that way during sex, you probably aren't going to. There is nothing wrong with that. You don't have to like what he likes and if he wants to force you to do it, he's an asshole.
I’m having a hard time with the whole “convinced me to have sex”
That screams sexual abuse to me and with this request and he seems to be pressuring you…. Idk man
I have a clarification question: when you say he convinced you to lose your virginity, what did he say/do? I don’t mean to alarm you but it sounds like this guy has been pressuring you. does he respect your boundaries when you say no? do you feel pressured or pushed to do things? Also it doesn’t matter if vomiting is normal during face fucking. You don’t want it, so you don’t have to do it.
I want you to ask yourself something: are you doing that to please him or because you really wanna try that stuff? you are entitled to your boundaries and there’s plenty of other ways to show love. also his way of showing love can be to respect your boundaries that’s actual love. It honestly sounds like he doesn’t respect you at all.
It sounds like this guy is manipulating you and pressuring you. I’m worried about your safety honey.
If you didn’t enjoy it, definitely don’t do it again.
When I give my boyfriend a BJ I really struggle, unless I’m in the right position where I’m in control. Mostly because I have a such a bad gag reflex! If he suggested face fucking I’d definitely vomit and it would honestly make me never put him in my mouth ever again! If your boyfriend is making you do this, dump him immediately. Vomiting during sex is not normal and he’s definitely got this kink from porn!
Get a strapon dildo about his size have him lay down then tell him to try it and you'll learn the proper way to get face fucked by watching the way he takes it, just that simple.
Some people need to understand that some kinks are better to only watch in porn. I can understand if he gets off to that, but trying to make your gf do something that's clearly not enjoyable (for most people) is not okay.
I hate face fucking. It’s nothing but a sexist porn trope. I find it extremely degrading. I won’t allow anyone to do it to me, and it is not something I would ever do to a submissive, unless it was specifically requested, and even then, there would need to be a lot of pre-scene discussion. If you don’t enjoy it, you *shouldn’t* do it. Kink isn’t an excuse to cause harm to partners. Kink is for the pleasure of ALL involved. Big hugs to you, OP.
You tried it even though it didn't look like something you would enjoy. You did your part and then some. He doesn't need to use you to fulfill every little kink he has. Just tell him you're not doing it anymore! This is your body and sex is for BOTH of you to enjoy! If he can't deal with that to Hell with him!
>i was virgin before he convinced me to have sex.
🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
That's called coercion, which is sexual assault.
Stop letting him trample over your boundaries. Set your boundaries and reinforce them. Or find someone who cares more about your comfort and boundaries in the first place.
Wtf is wrong with this guy. “Do it anyways it makes my sick feel good” is not a reasonable response to: “I think I might puke”. He has no consideration of you as a person when it comes to sex and sadly this will almost certainly continue.
okay extremely rude and thoughtless of him to bring up a comparison at all, let alone after a vulnerable sexual act where you felt uncomfortable
that aside, if you at all are interested in trying it again, first of all he needs to fix his attitude and approach and commit to improving his empathy, active listening, and solution-focused conflict resolution skills - those critical communication and relating skills will make all aspects of your sex life more fulfilling and intense anyway
then, don’t start back at the boss level / porn-observed version of face fucking… there are SO MANY more steps you can take first - I recently started to experiment with this with my bf (*who has excellent empathic listening and communication skills, so we already did phase 1*) so it’s very fresh in my mind
whichever way you want to start, do not progress to any steps where you are not in control until you have full mastery and control over versions where you control the pace and motion and you have a thorough communication plan that you’ve tested and practiced
also, if you don’t want to vomit, you definitely don’t have to feel bad about that and vomiting is only common with violent uncontrolled face fucking or where the receiver enjoys being degraded by being made to vomit so doesn’t protect their gag reflex from being triggered - which is absolutely possible! - you can even have a *throat orgasm* yourself while doing it (I haven’t got there yet but I have found a couple of angles and techniques that have felt uncharacteristically pleasurable and it’s definitely a goal to get on that level)
anyway, what are some things you enjoy doing or feel neutral about while going down on him? and have you successfully deep-throated before without tearing your throat? (you can avoid any undesired pain by adjusting your technique)
I would play around with deep throating positioning and techniques (where YOU control the depth and rhythm - you can also take nonverbal suggestions by holding one of his hands and you can communicate by something like rapid squeezes for faster or sustained for slower, and if you’re okay with trying him holding on to the back of your head - and it’s okay if you’re not ready for that, but if you are - then you can ease into it by him having a hand or hands there but not applying any force, and/or you put your own hand or hands over top of his and guide the pace, tapping on his hands if you’re going to stop, get air, check in, etc)
a lower discomfort version is also face-fucking but instead of aiming down your throat, slightly askew so it ends up distending your cheek (that can actually be pretty hot and you can play with the head through your cheek with a free hand, and when he cums if you’re okay with tasting it, it will drip out of your lips more, which can be hot)
I recently found a really good sweet spot when I was sitting on the couch and I had him kneel over me with his cock in my mouth and he braced himself by holding on to the back of the couch - I found a really great throat angle where I could breathe whenever I needed to really easily, which meant that I had zero inhibitions about high speed high suction deep throating, and I put both my hands on the back of my own head to precisely control the pace and protect my neck muscles; it was honestly so comfortable and not painful for me and I was so easily avoiding my gag reflex and painful angles that I could have done it for a very long time (I think we only stopped because he had just already cum 3 times back to back and was already about to pass out from dehydration and was on his way to get water when I stopped him and told him I wanted to try something for a second and it turned in to a whole thing when it went unexpectedly well 😝)
imho the level of suction and natural mouth-watering and arousal you can achieve when the receptive partner is in control of the pace and angle and can breathe and maneuver easily is unmatched
I think once you master it in an ideal position, you’ll be able to transfer those skills and self-knowledge to other positions, just like we more commonly do with intercourse positions (e.g. we know the “sweet spots” and find different ways to hit them or alter thrusting angles to optimize the sensations)
just wanted to note that part of the reason the controlled and progressively trained version is superior imo is that besides having oxygen being critical for like breathing and stuff it also means your muscles and cognition and focus are better and as a servicing partner you can provide more active and precise facilitation, for much longer periods of time
Don’t do it if you don’t want to. However, if you want to try an easier way, use your hand in front of your mouth. It doesn’t feel quite as good as no hands, but we still get the facefucking experience while you’re able to limit the depth.
Comparing you to his ex is an awful tactic. How do you know what he's saying is true? It's designed to manipulate you and make you feel bad. And it's not like you can easily go and ask her without (probable) drama and feeling self-conscious. Very underhanded. Do you feel like he cares about your enjoyment to return the grace you show him in bed, which is prioritizing his pleasure over your comfort? Or is it his way or the highway, or pouting and pleading? Definitely a red flag.
I absolutely agree with all these comments about the red flags and how you should never do something you really want to. Vomiting is not normal either.
However I will say personally that it is something I enjoy now but hated even the idea of a few years ago. It took finding the right partner, and the love in that, time, and 100% trust to develop before I got there. Changing your mind later is okay, both in choosing to try something again in a few years or stopping something in the middle of an act, or however else it might come up.
That position is not one that sounds good to me though. I would rather sit on the floor with him standing over me, it's easier to push the limits of a gag reflex without actually vomiting. And we both know and recognize the limits I have for it, if I get sick it ends fun time so we don't let it happen.
It’s ok not to do it ! When I was younger and dating a much older man, I felt forced into it and I still think about that lack of control wkd how much I hated it.
“Before he convinced me” is a big red flag. If you weren’t ready, he should have respected that. Tell him it’s all moving way too fast for you and you are not ready.
You need to set your own boundaries. If you don't want it, don't do it. You share your sexlife, it is not just his. If he wants advanced kink stuff he should maybe have found someone with experience.
If you don't like it now you most likely never will. Btw that guy is a cunt. Don't settle for someone who would pressure you into sex then further pressure you and then compare you to his ex when you say you don't like suffocating and vomiting for his pleasure
You can say no. You tried it and you’re not into it. I spent many years trying to be “better” at sex acts with men because I wanted to please them. Except I forgot about my own pleasure and desires in the process.
Never let anyone pressure you into doing anything sexually. If you don’t like the idea of it, you will likely never enjoy it.
It’s alarming that your boyfriend is trying to manipulate you into doing something that makes you uncomfortable.
You don't have to do anything you don't want, don't like, or aren't comfortable with.
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I personally think I'd reassess this relationship based on things you've said here. Starting with "talking you into it" and ending with comparing to an ex, & everything in between.
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He sounds yuck.
It seems he is very controlling.
You chose words like "introduced me" and "convinced me".
Now hes using his ex to get his own way with you by saying *she did*
Take control and say learn to say no.
A relationship is both ways, not 1 getting all they want
Ugh this makes me so mad he is taking advantage of you. You are not obligated to do uncomfortable things bc it sounds like he is pressuring you and that is Not okay at all. Also he should not bring up his ex like this and last thing is he shouldn’t expect you to act like in porn. That is super immature of him and porn is not like real life sex.
You don’t have to do this! Also, do you really want to do sex acts that make you vomit? Or be with a guy who thinks that’s normal?
This is a degrading thing and that’s why some people like it. But that doesn’t mean it’s not just plain, vanilla porn BS!
Nah, fuck this. You don't need this relationship babe. Find someone who actually respects you, even if it takes 10 years. I will tell you that he doesn't.
Of course!
We only get one life, one body. Gotta make the most of it while we're still here. There is no sexual act you SHOULD do. Just stuff that people want to do together.
If you're uncomfortable with it for any reason he needs to be more sensitive about that and not push you into it. What he's doing is disrespectful to you and you don't have to like it or try to make it easier. He needs to quit being so selfish and using you for his kicks. That's abuse.
Vomiting isn’t so bad sweetie, you get used to it, however if you really don’t like it he needs to accept it. Sex should be something enjoyable for both of you. There are tons of things you can do, and this might just not be for you. If you do go ahead with it, you need to learn how to breathe around the dick. That’s the key.
Personally I love face-fucking. It’s super hot. Love everything about it. But that’s just me.
If you’re not into it, or you feel like you’re being pressured, don’t do it.
EDIT I’ve just fully read this post and he is not an understanding partner, throwing up is NOT normal in sex and please don’t feel pressure to do things your not comfortable with. Eh, I’d personally leave this guy.
I’m generally not an extreme sub but I don’t mind face fucking if it’s controlled and it doesn’t go to my throat so I don’t gag at all, that’s the rules. It feels good to have a cock fuck my mouth but not my throat, and still feels good for him. Gets hard not to scrape him with my teeth tho so can’t do it for that long. But if you don’t want it at all you have every right to say no to that.
I like face fucking. It's fun and turns me on. But it does take prep and practice. And, ya know, consent. Don't do it if you don't want to. If he's being pushy, push back!
Okay so to answer your question...
Vomiting is common and normal during face fucking or throat fucking. I find that for my body, it's best not to eat 6 to 10 hours before attempting it. And to be well hydrated! I like to try in the mornings, after having a glass or two of water and maybe 1-3 hours after waking. This means an empty stomach and I'm unlikely to throw up anything besides saliva.
Then prep the area. You will create a lot of drool, saliva, and possibly vomit. Something you can get gross and not worry about -- like a waterproof blanket or a towel -- is a good option. You can also practice outside or in the shower, where mess isn't an issue.
Throatfucking is a whole beast on its own. Stretching your throat and controlling your gag reflex are things you can practice on your own using soft dildos. Giving yourself total control can help you push your abilities further.
You'll want to set up a safety signal, like tapping on him or shaking a bell, etc. to get him to pull out so you can breathe. When you begin practicing, make it very clear that if he doesn't obey the safety/stop signal, you're NEVER doing it again. This whole experience is predicated on trust and if he breaks it, no facefucking for him! There are no excuses, especially not "but I was close." Tap = stop. That's it.
Now, you've prepped and have some safety options... time to go nuts. Try different positions -- on your back, head off the bed isn't the only option! You can do it while kneeling as he stands, or 69ing, or kneeling next to him on the bed and leaning over his torso, too. Find the right angle that helps his cock slip down your throat.
If he curves up, you want something where your head points to his feet, for example.
Get that cock all wet with your tongue and lips. Then hold your mouth wide and push him down. You can practice with you in control first. Either push yourself down on him, or guide his hips to pull closer. That kind of thing.
Take your time, and don't hurt yourself. You likely wont be a champion cocksucker on day one and that's okay! With regular practice, you'll be surprised what you can do.
You can practice holding him (without him moving) in your throat as long as you can. You can practice swallowing while he's in there. Practice by counting thrusts until you gag/need to stop. Gamify it for yourself. Once you get used to one thing, add some tongue or lip action.
My partner loves when I swallow with in him my throat while my tongue laps at the base, for example. Or swirling the tongue as you come up for air. Intentionally gagging with the head just barely in my throat so it sort of jacks him off. Twisting my head like a corkscrew back and forth as I go up and down. There's a lot of variation you can add!
Once you're comfortable when you are in control, let him take the reins.
And remember throughout all of this that saliva, drool, tears, running noses, etc. Are all normal. That's why you've got all the towels. You're gonna get "gross" and that's okay. Guys often like the sloppy element, feeling it drip off them or seeing you covered in it.
Good luck with your explorations.
I think you need to communicate more.
Face fucking can be romantic. For a girl, it's an easing in process. My current partner never did that stuff before.
I started off gently. Minimizing deep throat. Communicating. Making her feel sexy. Then built it up. Now she loves being held down on my dick and I've taught her to deepthroat.
It isn't something you can just do right away.
Tip is to open your mouth wide and breathe around the dick. The urge is to breathe through the nose. Breathe through the mouth.
Most importantly, if it isn't for you... Talk about it.
If he is pressuring you into it then he doesn't respect your boundaries therefore doesn't respect you. If you want to continue trying it you can, but you and him need to go slow and communicate.
Yeah, hopefully it’s a troll and this creep doesn’t actually think this. Make sure to report comments like this. It’s completely not allowed in this sub.
she asks
>How do I make this easier? Is it practice or technique?
She's willing, not being forced.
Whether she should find a guy who treats her better and respects her: not for me to say, & not what she asked.
i’ll be honest, when blow jobs become “face fucking” i start to not enjoy it as much :( i like to hold the power when i’m going down on my man. just let him know you would rather have the control when you’re giving him a bj and explain it to him like “i want to be in charge of your pleasure when i’m going down on you.” he will 9 times out of 10 think that’s super hot and stop forcing his dick down your throat.
I enjoy being face fucked. Try some different positions and ask your boyfriend to go slow at first. agree on some hand signs/gestures to signal when you need him to slow down or stop all together.
I prefer to be on my knees in front of him, as though giving a bj. I squeeze his thigh if I need him to slow down, or repeatedly tap on him, anywhere I can reach, for him to stop.
As someone who is into face fucking, vomiting is absolutely not normal. Yes there are some people who intentionally go to that extreme but if you don’t want to vomit as part of the play then it’s not right.
In theory with practice yes you get better at doing it for longer periods of time and not vomiting but if you aren’t into it then you would probably not because you would be thinking about how much you dislike it the whole time.
Do what makes you feels good. Screw him. You don’t owe it to anyone to try things you don’t like. It was rude at best to mention his ex. I agree with others that it could be problematic. If it’s the first time he has said something like that then maybe it was an asshole comment but we all make comments that we regret.
He did stop when you asked so maybe not a total asshole.
Hard to say without knowing more.
Actual advice for the face fucking if you genuinely want to continue for your enjoyment as well, touch your tonsils more often and for longer periods of time to desensitize them and gag less
If he likes face fucking so much get out the strap on and give it a go!
Make sure to ressure him... a simple "Don't worry babe the vomiting is normal!"
Don't worry he'll get used to it! Just like his ex did 😉 justtt gotta pressure him into it! As easy as pie!!
> he said vomiting is normal
Oh hell no. If both parties are into that then whatever, but it's not the default by any means. The key to good face fucking is doing it with a partner that is considerate and respects you and your wishes.
Should have just told him to go beg his ex and kicked him out.
My ex lived by the mantra of "I'll try anything twice. I might not enjoy the first time, but the second could be different. If the second is just as bad, then no more". I've kinda adopted that outlook, and it has paid off a couple of times, but there will always be something that doesn't float your boat, and you shouldn't be manipulated into doing those things.
That said, your boyfriend is living in dreamland if he believes vomitting during sex is "normal". It might be normal in facefucking porn, but those women are paid actresses, not a supposedly loving partner. I'd be inclined to put your foot down if you're not comfortable with the act, sex should be something both parties enjoy, and if you're not getting any enjoyment from it, then you don't have to engage in whatever act is causing discomfort.
Comparing you to his ex is also inexcusable IMO...everyone is different, but there shouldn't be any reason for belittling someone because someone else did something differently.
As a woman who likes giving and receiving oral, facefucking isn’t normal neither is vomiting imo. If they’re really into it I’ll let them indulge every now and then but won’t let it get out of control. If I let them know I need a break then I better get it or we’re done. I will say this is where having a small penis is a huge advantage. They have a bit longer lease with what I can handle.
Vomiting isn't normal ??? Not sure what he's on about. It's a normal result of tripping your gag reflex too much and too hard, but with some practice on your part and some care on his it absolutely should not be expected.
That said, make him take it slow. If you were a virgin before you met him you probably hadn't even deepthroated yet, so he needs to understand "Hey, people have all different skill levels when it comes to sex. I need time to learn and if you wanna do those things with me you need to be patient and take it slow, I'm not a porn start, I don't come out of the box with those tricks."
If you do feel comfortable and WANT to do that for him, learn how to deepthroat consistently, and then slowly start doing it a bit faster until you can handle it. Come up to breathe whenever you air and have a safe word or a safe tapping pattern (in case your mouth is otherwise occupied at the time) like the "*Shave and a haircut, two bits!*" Jingle (what me and my gf use when I'm holding her down and she wants air). The girl has just a little less control here than she does when you're in her vagina, because while she can stop things, she can't speak up, so pre-facefuck both parties need to be clear what signals to look for and what they mean, and then during the face fuck the fuckee has to be very on point with signals and the fucker has to be VERY attentive.
All that said he's gotta stop with the weird attempts at convincing you, idk the guy fully but from how he communicates sexuality it sounds like he likes an awful lot for you to hear about HIS tastes, but when yours come up its a subject of debate and he can prove you wrong. Don't fall into that trap. Him comparing you to his ex is flagrantly manipulative and he definitely doesn't deserve any throat game for at least a while for that comment. He could have been doing it to demonstrate you get used to it but he's gotta be way more careful about the wording in that case, because he was all around kinda shitty about this.
Put on a strap on and face fuck him ... He may not like it in the beginning but eventually he will love it.
If he cannot eventually find it pleasing .. then you also are perfectly normal to not find it pleasing .
Maybe I'm reading into this too much, but it sounds like your BF is trying to get you to keep doing new things he sees in porn. There is absolutely no reason you need to keep submitting to his ideas. Try them once if you want to, but if you don't like something, stop doing it. There is no reason you need to learn how to enjoy face fucking just because you BF wants to do it.
If I don’t like anything sexual and vise versa my fiancé and I respect each other.(i.e. I like having my hair pulled but it makes my fiancé uncomfortable so I respect that he does not want to do it and I don’t ask him to even though it feels good to me.) It doesn’t hurt to try something once but it does hurt to force someone to continue doing something they expressed that they dislike, especially sexually.
I don't know where he thinks vomiting is normal.
I've been faced fucked by guys before, I enjoy it but I always tap them to stop when it's getting too much and then after depending on how I feel afterwards we continue or move into something else
If you don't like it now, you probably aren't going to in the future. You might learn to tolerate it but only doing it for his pleasure and not yours is not something you have to tolerate.
If you want to stop, then tell him this isn't for you. If he truely cares about you then I'll live without it. Maybe you can revisit it later and give it another try but you don't have to find ways to make something you're not comfortable doing or dislike more enjoyable for him.
My observation: if a man wants oral sex, that man wants to humiliate a woman. A man gets pleasure from feeling superior to a woman.
I'm a man and it doesn't turn me on. I follow other men and get interesting experiences.
More observations: if a man gets offended because a woman refuses or "doesn't suck properly", then this is a red flag. Such a man is aggressive by nature. If you don't like oral sex, you can't make it pleasant. Avoid men who have such desires.
Tell him that your new kink is penis chewing and CBT. See if he reciprocates or if your relationship is a one-sided facefuckfest. You’ll learn something, about him, about you. Might be worth it
I [M] have never done this, but I sincerely can't imagine it feels any better than just a normal.blowjob, so I think the thrill in this would be in talking you into doing something you dont really want to do. A bad sign.
“before he convinced me to have sex” (you didn’t want to do it and he kept pushing).
“his ex didn’t like it at first but keep doing it and it’ll get easier” (shaming and more pressure).
“vomiting is normal” (it’s not.)
i’ve done face fucking with my fwb and if i even give the slightest gag he lets up. it’s not supposed to be forceful enough to induce vomiting feeling.
sounds like this guy has pressured you in your sex life this whole time. to the curb he goes.
Vomiting is *not* normal. If that is part of his kink and you aren’t comfortable with it, you are entitled to say no, full stop. It’s disturbing that he would keep trying to go through with knowing how uncomfortable it makes you.
He's pressuring you to do something that you're not comfortable with. That is NOT okay.
Also, you could aspirate from vomiting in that position.
You may want to rethink your relationship with this man.
He sounds like the type that will keep pressuring you and slowly pushing your boundaries, and the instance you either say no, or he gets bored, cheat on you. He's already showing a ton of red flags. I'd leave before he convinces you to do more things you don't feel comfortable with.
No, making the other person vomit is NOT normal. Anyone trying this should start off slow. If you don't like it though, you are not obligated to do it. Both people should find some kind of pleasure in what they're doing or not do it at all. Be careful.
Take it slow at first. The shit in porn isn't always enjoyable in real life. My boyfriend does fuck my face but not as aggressively as in porn, and when we first did it he was extremely slow and gentle.
You don't have to give up all the control in the situation. You can ask him not to go deep, you can ask him to slow down, you can take breaks.
And at the end of the day you can choose not to do it at all.
'before he convinced me to have sex...' this guy sounds absolutely horrible and disrespectful and he's trying to treat you like a sex doll, I hope you can dump him and come to discover it's not supposed to be like that.
circling back tho, he convinced you to have sex? i’d encourage you to have a serious look at what happened, because coercion isn’t consent. Only do what you’re comfortable with < 3
Convinced to lose your virginity is a no no. Things will not go well from here. You're your own advocate, what you are "convinced" to do will keep being pushed even way past breaking you. Homeboy sucks. Be careful.
Tell him to go into porn and ditch normal relationships if this is what he wants to do.
Porn consumption in all its glory, destroying men and their sexuality.
I'm concerning about the fact that he "convinced " you yo have sex for the first time. To me sort of sounds like he sort of pushed it to happen. If he was a caring partner he would have waited till you were ready. Also he started exposing you to his kinks with you basically being new to sex. Sounds to me he's looking for a sexdoll who breathes and he can use to his hearts contempt. You don't owe your partner sex. If they make it a chore for you it will become unpleasant.....
Probably an unpopular opinion.
Nothing wrong his kink. I'm saying that because people are shaming the kink. It's personal preference. I'm a girl and I enjoy face fucking. It's a big turn on. The key with any kink is always that both people actually enjoy it and want to do it. If you dont want to do it, you should say no and he should respect that.
Sometimes people do throw up during this particular activity. I have a couple times. I usually actually stop eating several hours beforehand, only water, just in case. Face fucking is a typical aspect of sex for me so I do what I need to do. It rarely happens that I throw up, but it happens and can be more likely if my stomach is full, as I feel it triggers my gag reflex significantly more than usual. Plus it's obviously not appealing to throw up food. That is my experience. Yes, with practice you will learn to control your gag reflex making vomiting a rare thing. And you will figure other things out that work for you.
Is it normal? He probably meant that it doesnt bother him. It's normal, if that's what you like. I've had partners that like that. Or simply think it's fine. I usually try to avoid throwing up. It definitely doesnt add anything to the experience for me lol.
I will add that if he is coercing you or pressuring you, in any way to do any sexual activity whatsoever, that is not right. You should do things because you want to and when you're ready. And he should respect that. So if he is the kind of guy that pressures you into things, walk away.
Vomiting is not normal. Porn is not normal. If you based your sex lot around what is in porn your gonna be disappointed more often than not.
If you don’t want it don’t do it. If he continues to insist kick him in the dick and move on
I say this as a married man: You don't owe anyone anything but you'd be doing a favor to the women who date him after you dump him if you put your foot down and tell him vomiting during sex is not normal. If you don't want to do it, don't do it. If he keeps pushing it, it's time to dump him and move on.
Fuck yes!!! This right here. My husband has more experience than me and not ONCE has he pushed me into or had to convince me of something. Nah, don’t even wait to get rid of this dude, listen to the married guy, vomiting should not and is not a normal occurrence during sex.
This is a lil sketchy. You also said “he convinced me to have sex” if you do love this guy you need to communicate with him. If your not at his level thats ok but you could have a better experience if you didn’t just let him use you. Idk I’m getting a very small part of the sitch. I’d never do something a lady wasn’t comfortable with. Also you don’t need to be expected to do any of that stuff….
You’re responding to OP, not my comment, correct?
Yes. I didn’t realize I left the comment on yours
Gotcha. I was trying to figure out what I said that was sketchy 😆
You don't have to like everything in bed! It's good to try things (but not by being talked into it like your boyfriend is doing here), but after you try them it's ok and normal to say "not my thing, not doing that again". You don't like it. It didn't feel good for you and you didn't feel safe. You can say no the next time he asks for this. And can I just say, comparing you to his ex sucks and needs to stop. Does he mention her as a way to make you feel insecure to make you do things?
Also, besides comparing to ex, he's just living in fantasy land... Porn induced!
It's amazing how many guys truly believe that real sex should be exactly like porn sex. The absolute best sex is when both of you feel comfortabl, close, and satisfied. The one sided acts can be fun every once in a while if they're reciprocated but they aren't the greatest part of sex.
he is pressurizing you into doing this, he tells you he coerced his ex into doing this when she didn't enjoy it. This is a huge red flag. you don't like this he should be stopping from even asking. Tell him to stop asking and if he does it again leave and block him. He does not understand boundaries and that is dangerous and definitely not sexy. You do wonder what his reaction would be if he were to experiment with someone face fucking him with a dildo that mimics his size.
I'd advise you also to try fucking his face. I hope he'll appreciate the experience of pleasing you too. (PS - I say this as someone eager to please. YMMV.)
If you don’t like it don’t do it. Simple as. If someone is pressuring you in any way then they get NO access as you can’t trust them.
You are not a porn star. Wtf is up with these men! I swear dude, porn is ruining relationships.
My thought is that your boyfriend is exhibiting clear signs of red flags in your relationship. Him "convincing" you to have sex is not a great start - ANYTHING sexual that you do should not only be consensual but enthusiastic. If you weren't ready, he should not have pressured you at all. Same thing goes for trying out his kinks. While I applaud you for being open to trying new things out, you should ALWAYS feel confident to say no if you are not comfortable with things, and not be pressured into doing things you either don't want to try or have tried and didn't like. Face fucking is not something that everyone is comfortable with, can lead to pain in the throat; there are posts on here where people complain about pain days after the event. You don't say how the rest of your relationship is, but be confident, speak up, and don't be pressured into these things ... no relationship is worth that.
I agree here^^^^^
Fucking christ these men fucking suck. Pardon my language. I'm gonna ban myself I can't read these anymore, makes me sad to be one. Edit: I feel bad I offered no advice. Say no if you're uncomfortable. Making someone throw up during sex is not ok...wtf I mean if you enjoy it that's one thing but don't be abused for someones pleasure. There are better men.
Set boundaries and if he doesn’t respect them, leave. No one should be “convincing” you into anything.
> I made him stop because i felt like I would vomit even though he said vomiting is normal. Bleeding is normal if someone stabs you. “Normal” is not synonymous with “good”. > I don't want to know that his ex was better than me at something. I don’t know if “tolerating vomiting” counts as a skill but almost anything is possible with practice.
Grab a 9” long, 4” thick dildo. Have your boyfriend lay down and shove it repeated and violently down his throat. As you well know, you can’t breath with a dick down your throat. Let him become deeply intimate with air hunger. I like being face fucked. But you don’t. End of fucking story.
Assuming 4” thick means girth(circumference) and a good training size. Because a 4” wide dildo won’t get past anyone’s molars even with a massive mouth.
Huh? What’s molar?
Large flat teeth 🦷
Oh I got it.
We do a lot of FF with my bf (I’m female), I’m the one asking for it most of the time. However, he never, ever went deep enough to make me uncomfortable, or asked for it. Like it’s more about the penis tip + a bit more? It’s like this naughty idea of it that I like, so there. And, also, vomiting is def not ‘normal’, I felt sick reading this :(
Yeah, thank you for this perspective. I’m a man, and I (and my SO) absolutely love FF. But Jesus, I’m careful not to make my partner gag, let alone puke. Jesus.
So let’s take a note: You both like it but you don’t go deep and hard?
That’s correct. I love receiving oral, and she loves giving it. FF allows for me to have more control. But, much like when she’s giving me a blowjob, gaging is rare and puking is non existent.
Would you too love the classical one where you’d remain still? And for other redditors: how common is it that he thrusts when receiving oral?
Variety is the spice of life.
Well, as long as it is just as you do it, it doesn’t seem to be that bad.
It’s fine for him to have kinks and want to intorduce them too you and ask you to try them. But… > I made him stop because i felt like I would vomit even though he said vomiting is normal. He also told me his ex didn’t like it at first but after you do it a lot it gets easier which made me feel horrible. Red flag parade right there. Vomiting may be something that happens accidentally during face fucking. It’s generally something that is avoided, but *might* happen. It sounds like he doesn’t want to face fuck you. He wants to make you puke on his dick. That is a big step beyond just facefucking and is into some extreme bdsm territory. That isn’t somewhere you just take an inexperienced partner without detailed conversations, baby steps, **and most importantly making sure said partner is really into and enjoying this**. He is basically pushing you into his extreme kinks and disregarding your comfort. With this kink, a good, ethical partner would discuss the kink with you and then ease into over time, while checking in to make sure you are comfortable with everything and are enjoying yourself. He’s just using you and taking a “fuck your feelings” approach. The icing on this shit cake is that he is then manipulating you into doing these things by comparing you to his ex. He is trying to act out shit he has seen in extreme porn. Very few people actually enjoy what he wants you to do. Fucking run. This guy is sick. I say this as someone that has some extreme kinks. An ethical person would never act the way he is acting. He is manipulating you and abusing you. Edit: I also see your other post about your boyfriend watching porn that features women in pain. And it sounds like he coerced you into losing your virginity to him. Jesus Christ. Please get away from this guy. He is pushing a very distorted view of sex on you.
[удалено]
WTH? I wouldn't consider vomiting during face fucking normal.
Basic face fucking no, definitely not beginner face fucking, but the more extreme methods (with experienced playmates) can lead to it. So normal isn't quite wrong, but definitely not completely right.
‘Convinced me to have sex’
Code for “whined and guilted”
If you don't like it, don't do it. If you want to be able to do it, try deepthroating him first. A setting where you are in control of how fast, rough and deep it goes. Over a while you indeed get "better" at it but simply just going straight to facefucking is insane.
Tell your loser BF to stop watching porn and worse yet, expecting you to be his personal sex toy. Geez
D bag. Ditch him.
If you hate something, don't do it. You are absolutely allowed to say no and have boundaries. If he keeps pushing after you've said no, then dump him.
If vomiting or near vomiting is happening, that would be a full stop. Tell him you don’t enjoy it. It he continues to try to convince you, tell him you will try it again if he lets you face fuck him several times with a big strap-on.
"...convinced me to have sex", "vomiting is normal" and then referencing to his ex... wow... just... wow...
You don't. This is a thing that some people enjoy. It's degrading, painful, and can be frightening. If you don't enjoy feeling that way during sex, you probably aren't going to. There is nothing wrong with that. You don't have to like what he likes and if he wants to force you to do it, he's an asshole.
I’m having a hard time with the whole “convinced me to have sex” That screams sexual abuse to me and with this request and he seems to be pressuring you…. Idk man
I have a clarification question: when you say he convinced you to lose your virginity, what did he say/do? I don’t mean to alarm you but it sounds like this guy has been pressuring you. does he respect your boundaries when you say no? do you feel pressured or pushed to do things? Also it doesn’t matter if vomiting is normal during face fucking. You don’t want it, so you don’t have to do it. I want you to ask yourself something: are you doing that to please him or because you really wanna try that stuff? you are entitled to your boundaries and there’s plenty of other ways to show love. also his way of showing love can be to respect your boundaries that’s actual love. It honestly sounds like he doesn’t respect you at all. It sounds like this guy is manipulating you and pressuring you. I’m worried about your safety honey.
If you didn’t enjoy it, definitely don’t do it again. When I give my boyfriend a BJ I really struggle, unless I’m in the right position where I’m in control. Mostly because I have a such a bad gag reflex! If he suggested face fucking I’d definitely vomit and it would honestly make me never put him in my mouth ever again! If your boyfriend is making you do this, dump him immediately. Vomiting during sex is not normal and he’s definitely got this kink from porn!
Get a strapon dildo about his size have him lay down then tell him to try it and you'll learn the proper way to get face fucked by watching the way he takes it, just that simple.
He really sounds like a piece of shit, girl! You deserve better!
Some people need to understand that some kinks are better to only watch in porn. I can understand if he gets off to that, but trying to make your gf do something that's clearly not enjoyable (for most people) is not okay.
I hate face fucking. It’s nothing but a sexist porn trope. I find it extremely degrading. I won’t allow anyone to do it to me, and it is not something I would ever do to a submissive, unless it was specifically requested, and even then, there would need to be a lot of pre-scene discussion. If you don’t enjoy it, you *shouldn’t* do it. Kink isn’t an excuse to cause harm to partners. Kink is for the pleasure of ALL involved. Big hugs to you, OP.
You tried it even though it didn't look like something you would enjoy. You did your part and then some. He doesn't need to use you to fulfill every little kink he has. Just tell him you're not doing it anymore! This is your body and sex is for BOTH of you to enjoy! If he can't deal with that to Hell with him!
Coercion. Leave
>i was virgin before he convinced me to have sex. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 That's called coercion, which is sexual assault. Stop letting him trample over your boundaries. Set your boundaries and reinforce them. Or find someone who cares more about your comfort and boundaries in the first place.
Wtf is wrong with this guy. “Do it anyways it makes my sick feel good” is not a reasonable response to: “I think I might puke”. He has no consideration of you as a person when it comes to sex and sadly this will almost certainly continue.
okay extremely rude and thoughtless of him to bring up a comparison at all, let alone after a vulnerable sexual act where you felt uncomfortable that aside, if you at all are interested in trying it again, first of all he needs to fix his attitude and approach and commit to improving his empathy, active listening, and solution-focused conflict resolution skills - those critical communication and relating skills will make all aspects of your sex life more fulfilling and intense anyway then, don’t start back at the boss level / porn-observed version of face fucking… there are SO MANY more steps you can take first - I recently started to experiment with this with my bf (*who has excellent empathic listening and communication skills, so we already did phase 1*) so it’s very fresh in my mind whichever way you want to start, do not progress to any steps where you are not in control until you have full mastery and control over versions where you control the pace and motion and you have a thorough communication plan that you’ve tested and practiced also, if you don’t want to vomit, you definitely don’t have to feel bad about that and vomiting is only common with violent uncontrolled face fucking or where the receiver enjoys being degraded by being made to vomit so doesn’t protect their gag reflex from being triggered - which is absolutely possible! - you can even have a *throat orgasm* yourself while doing it (I haven’t got there yet but I have found a couple of angles and techniques that have felt uncharacteristically pleasurable and it’s definitely a goal to get on that level) anyway, what are some things you enjoy doing or feel neutral about while going down on him? and have you successfully deep-throated before without tearing your throat? (you can avoid any undesired pain by adjusting your technique) I would play around with deep throating positioning and techniques (where YOU control the depth and rhythm - you can also take nonverbal suggestions by holding one of his hands and you can communicate by something like rapid squeezes for faster or sustained for slower, and if you’re okay with trying him holding on to the back of your head - and it’s okay if you’re not ready for that, but if you are - then you can ease into it by him having a hand or hands there but not applying any force, and/or you put your own hand or hands over top of his and guide the pace, tapping on his hands if you’re going to stop, get air, check in, etc) a lower discomfort version is also face-fucking but instead of aiming down your throat, slightly askew so it ends up distending your cheek (that can actually be pretty hot and you can play with the head through your cheek with a free hand, and when he cums if you’re okay with tasting it, it will drip out of your lips more, which can be hot) I recently found a really good sweet spot when I was sitting on the couch and I had him kneel over me with his cock in my mouth and he braced himself by holding on to the back of the couch - I found a really great throat angle where I could breathe whenever I needed to really easily, which meant that I had zero inhibitions about high speed high suction deep throating, and I put both my hands on the back of my own head to precisely control the pace and protect my neck muscles; it was honestly so comfortable and not painful for me and I was so easily avoiding my gag reflex and painful angles that I could have done it for a very long time (I think we only stopped because he had just already cum 3 times back to back and was already about to pass out from dehydration and was on his way to get water when I stopped him and told him I wanted to try something for a second and it turned in to a whole thing when it went unexpectedly well 😝) imho the level of suction and natural mouth-watering and arousal you can achieve when the receptive partner is in control of the pace and angle and can breathe and maneuver easily is unmatched I think once you master it in an ideal position, you’ll be able to transfer those skills and self-knowledge to other positions, just like we more commonly do with intercourse positions (e.g. we know the “sweet spots” and find different ways to hit them or alter thrusting angles to optimize the sensations)
just wanted to note that part of the reason the controlled and progressively trained version is superior imo is that besides having oxygen being critical for like breathing and stuff it also means your muscles and cognition and focus are better and as a servicing partner you can provide more active and precise facilitation, for much longer periods of time
Don’t do it if you don’t want to. However, if you want to try an easier way, use your hand in front of your mouth. It doesn’t feel quite as good as no hands, but we still get the facefucking experience while you’re able to limit the depth.
Comparing you to his ex is an awful tactic. How do you know what he's saying is true? It's designed to manipulate you and make you feel bad. And it's not like you can easily go and ask her without (probable) drama and feeling self-conscious. Very underhanded. Do you feel like he cares about your enjoyment to return the grace you show him in bed, which is prioritizing his pleasure over your comfort? Or is it his way or the highway, or pouting and pleading? Definitely a red flag.
I absolutely agree with all these comments about the red flags and how you should never do something you really want to. Vomiting is not normal either. However I will say personally that it is something I enjoy now but hated even the idea of a few years ago. It took finding the right partner, and the love in that, time, and 100% trust to develop before I got there. Changing your mind later is okay, both in choosing to try something again in a few years or stopping something in the middle of an act, or however else it might come up. That position is not one that sounds good to me though. I would rather sit on the floor with him standing over me, it's easier to push the limits of a gag reflex without actually vomiting. And we both know and recognize the limits I have for it, if I get sick it ends fun time so we don't let it happen.
It’s ok not to do it ! When I was younger and dating a much older man, I felt forced into it and I still think about that lack of control wkd how much I hated it.
This guy seems terrible from what you're saying
“Before he convinced me” is a big red flag. If you weren’t ready, he should have respected that. Tell him it’s all moving way too fast for you and you are not ready.
Read this somewhere else. Leave him. He shouldn’t be trying to convince you to do something you don’t like. He shouldn’t want to see you in pain
You need to set your own boundaries. If you don't want it, don't do it. You share your sexlife, it is not just his. If he wants advanced kink stuff he should maybe have found someone with experience.
If you don't like it now you most likely never will. Btw that guy is a cunt. Don't settle for someone who would pressure you into sex then further pressure you and then compare you to his ex when you say you don't like suffocating and vomiting for his pleasure
wym he 'convinced' you?
You can say no. You tried it and you’re not into it. I spent many years trying to be “better” at sex acts with men because I wanted to please them. Except I forgot about my own pleasure and desires in the process.
Never let anyone pressure you into doing anything sexually. If you don’t like the idea of it, you will likely never enjoy it. It’s alarming that your boyfriend is trying to manipulate you into doing something that makes you uncomfortable.
You don't have to do anything you don't want, don't like, or aren't comfortable with. _____ I personally think I'd reassess this relationship based on things you've said here. Starting with "talking you into it" and ending with comparing to an ex, & everything in between. _____ He sounds yuck.
Ew… bringing up an ex used to do sexual stuff… get a real man… sounds like a real tool
It seems he is very controlling. You chose words like "introduced me" and "convinced me". Now hes using his ex to get his own way with you by saying *she did* Take control and say learn to say no. A relationship is both ways, not 1 getting all they want
Ugh this makes me so mad he is taking advantage of you. You are not obligated to do uncomfortable things bc it sounds like he is pressuring you and that is Not okay at all. Also he should not bring up his ex like this and last thing is he shouldn’t expect you to act like in porn. That is super immature of him and porn is not like real life sex.
You don’t have to do this! Also, do you really want to do sex acts that make you vomit? Or be with a guy who thinks that’s normal? This is a degrading thing and that’s why some people like it. But that doesn’t mean it’s not just plain, vanilla porn BS!
I’m sorry but him comparing you to his ex was a big slap in the face
You don’t make it easier. You tell him you don’t like it and never do it again. Where do these guys come from?
Do not do anything you don’t want to do. Do not do anything that you don’t like. If he wants to leave you over that, then he is not the one anyway.
Nah, fuck this. You don't need this relationship babe. Find someone who actually respects you, even if it takes 10 years. I will tell you that he doesn't.
Thank you!
Of course! We only get one life, one body. Gotta make the most of it while we're still here. There is no sexual act you SHOULD do. Just stuff that people want to do together.
If you're uncomfortable with it for any reason he needs to be more sensitive about that and not push you into it. What he's doing is disrespectful to you and you don't have to like it or try to make it easier. He needs to quit being so selfish and using you for his kicks. That's abuse.
Vomiting isn’t so bad sweetie, you get used to it, however if you really don’t like it he needs to accept it. Sex should be something enjoyable for both of you. There are tons of things you can do, and this might just not be for you. If you do go ahead with it, you need to learn how to breathe around the dick. That’s the key.
Yes. The breathing is it!
Personally I love face-fucking. It’s super hot. Love everything about it. But that’s just me. If you’re not into it, or you feel like you’re being pressured, don’t do it.
EDIT I’ve just fully read this post and he is not an understanding partner, throwing up is NOT normal in sex and please don’t feel pressure to do things your not comfortable with. Eh, I’d personally leave this guy. I’m generally not an extreme sub but I don’t mind face fucking if it’s controlled and it doesn’t go to my throat so I don’t gag at all, that’s the rules. It feels good to have a cock fuck my mouth but not my throat, and still feels good for him. Gets hard not to scrape him with my teeth tho so can’t do it for that long. But if you don’t want it at all you have every right to say no to that.
I like face fucking. It's fun and turns me on. But it does take prep and practice. And, ya know, consent. Don't do it if you don't want to. If he's being pushy, push back! Okay so to answer your question... Vomiting is common and normal during face fucking or throat fucking. I find that for my body, it's best not to eat 6 to 10 hours before attempting it. And to be well hydrated! I like to try in the mornings, after having a glass or two of water and maybe 1-3 hours after waking. This means an empty stomach and I'm unlikely to throw up anything besides saliva. Then prep the area. You will create a lot of drool, saliva, and possibly vomit. Something you can get gross and not worry about -- like a waterproof blanket or a towel -- is a good option. You can also practice outside or in the shower, where mess isn't an issue. Throatfucking is a whole beast on its own. Stretching your throat and controlling your gag reflex are things you can practice on your own using soft dildos. Giving yourself total control can help you push your abilities further. You'll want to set up a safety signal, like tapping on him or shaking a bell, etc. to get him to pull out so you can breathe. When you begin practicing, make it very clear that if he doesn't obey the safety/stop signal, you're NEVER doing it again. This whole experience is predicated on trust and if he breaks it, no facefucking for him! There are no excuses, especially not "but I was close." Tap = stop. That's it. Now, you've prepped and have some safety options... time to go nuts. Try different positions -- on your back, head off the bed isn't the only option! You can do it while kneeling as he stands, or 69ing, or kneeling next to him on the bed and leaning over his torso, too. Find the right angle that helps his cock slip down your throat. If he curves up, you want something where your head points to his feet, for example. Get that cock all wet with your tongue and lips. Then hold your mouth wide and push him down. You can practice with you in control first. Either push yourself down on him, or guide his hips to pull closer. That kind of thing. Take your time, and don't hurt yourself. You likely wont be a champion cocksucker on day one and that's okay! With regular practice, you'll be surprised what you can do. You can practice holding him (without him moving) in your throat as long as you can. You can practice swallowing while he's in there. Practice by counting thrusts until you gag/need to stop. Gamify it for yourself. Once you get used to one thing, add some tongue or lip action. My partner loves when I swallow with in him my throat while my tongue laps at the base, for example. Or swirling the tongue as you come up for air. Intentionally gagging with the head just barely in my throat so it sort of jacks him off. Twisting my head like a corkscrew back and forth as I go up and down. There's a lot of variation you can add! Once you're comfortable when you are in control, let him take the reins. And remember throughout all of this that saliva, drool, tears, running noses, etc. Are all normal. That's why you've got all the towels. You're gonna get "gross" and that's okay. Guys often like the sloppy element, feeling it drip off them or seeing you covered in it. Good luck with your explorations.
I think you need to communicate more. Face fucking can be romantic. For a girl, it's an easing in process. My current partner never did that stuff before. I started off gently. Minimizing deep throat. Communicating. Making her feel sexy. Then built it up. Now she loves being held down on my dick and I've taught her to deepthroat. It isn't something you can just do right away. Tip is to open your mouth wide and breathe around the dick. The urge is to breathe through the nose. Breathe through the mouth. Most importantly, if it isn't for you... Talk about it.
Vomiting isn't normal, it's an opt in.
Fuk him off!!!
If he is pressuring you into it then he doesn't respect your boundaries therefore doesn't respect you. If you want to continue trying it you can, but you and him need to go slow and communicate.
Take this advice, and apply it to your own post from an hour earlier.
Was about to say the same. Can't be giving out good advice if you can't apply them to yourself.
why cant you apply this to yourself. so irritating to see you give this decent advice but you cant follow it yourself like come on...
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That's pretty fucked up. You're acting as if she should have no agency when it comes to herself, and that it's all about him. Wtf is wrong with you?
Yeah, hopefully it’s a troll and this creep doesn’t actually think this. Make sure to report comments like this. It’s completely not allowed in this sub.
There's a big difference between sucking dick and being forced to hang over the bed being face fucked until you vomit.
she asks >How do I make this easier? Is it practice or technique? She's willing, not being forced. Whether she should find a guy who treats her better and respects her: not for me to say, & not what she asked.
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What's wrong with you? If you need to dissociate to force yourself through a sexual act there is trauma occurring or trauma being triggered.
convinced. damn.
My god, these titles. Good afternoon, reddit
i’ll be honest, when blow jobs become “face fucking” i start to not enjoy it as much :( i like to hold the power when i’m going down on my man. just let him know you would rather have the control when you’re giving him a bj and explain it to him like “i want to be in charge of your pleasure when i’m going down on you.” he will 9 times out of 10 think that’s super hot and stop forcing his dick down your throat.
I enjoy being face fucked. Try some different positions and ask your boyfriend to go slow at first. agree on some hand signs/gestures to signal when you need him to slow down or stop all together. I prefer to be on my knees in front of him, as though giving a bj. I squeeze his thigh if I need him to slow down, or repeatedly tap on him, anywhere I can reach, for him to stop.
Yikes him saying vomiting is normal is a huge red flag. If my actions were going to make my partner vomit in bed I would stop immediately.
As someone who is into face fucking, vomiting is absolutely not normal. Yes there are some people who intentionally go to that extreme but if you don’t want to vomit as part of the play then it’s not right. In theory with practice yes you get better at doing it for longer periods of time and not vomiting but if you aren’t into it then you would probably not because you would be thinking about how much you dislike it the whole time. Do what makes you feels good. Screw him. You don’t owe it to anyone to try things you don’t like. It was rude at best to mention his ex. I agree with others that it could be problematic. If it’s the first time he has said something like that then maybe it was an asshole comment but we all make comments that we regret. He did stop when you asked so maybe not a total asshole. Hard to say without knowing more. Actual advice for the face fucking if you genuinely want to continue for your enjoyment as well, touch your tonsils more often and for longer periods of time to desensitize them and gag less
Vomiting on dick is normal during sex? I think not lol, maybe he has a vomit kink.
I’m sorry… “vomiting is normal?” Yeah, no. Unless that’s part of the kink I’ve never thrown up.
If he likes face fucking so much get out the strap on and give it a go! Make sure to ressure him... a simple "Don't worry babe the vomiting is normal!" Don't worry he'll get used to it! Just like his ex did 😉 justtt gotta pressure him into it! As easy as pie!!
> he said vomiting is normal Oh hell no. If both parties are into that then whatever, but it's not the default by any means. The key to good face fucking is doing it with a partner that is considerate and respects you and your wishes. Should have just told him to go beg his ex and kicked him out.
Dump the motherfucker
My ex lived by the mantra of "I'll try anything twice. I might not enjoy the first time, but the second could be different. If the second is just as bad, then no more". I've kinda adopted that outlook, and it has paid off a couple of times, but there will always be something that doesn't float your boat, and you shouldn't be manipulated into doing those things. That said, your boyfriend is living in dreamland if he believes vomitting during sex is "normal". It might be normal in facefucking porn, but those women are paid actresses, not a supposedly loving partner. I'd be inclined to put your foot down if you're not comfortable with the act, sex should be something both parties enjoy, and if you're not getting any enjoyment from it, then you don't have to engage in whatever act is causing discomfort. Comparing you to his ex is also inexcusable IMO...everyone is different, but there shouldn't be any reason for belittling someone because someone else did something differently.
As a woman who likes giving and receiving oral, facefucking isn’t normal neither is vomiting imo. If they’re really into it I’ll let them indulge every now and then but won’t let it get out of control. If I let them know I need a break then I better get it or we’re done. I will say this is where having a small penis is a huge advantage. They have a bit longer lease with what I can handle.
Vomiting isn't normal ??? Not sure what he's on about. It's a normal result of tripping your gag reflex too much and too hard, but with some practice on your part and some care on his it absolutely should not be expected. That said, make him take it slow. If you were a virgin before you met him you probably hadn't even deepthroated yet, so he needs to understand "Hey, people have all different skill levels when it comes to sex. I need time to learn and if you wanna do those things with me you need to be patient and take it slow, I'm not a porn start, I don't come out of the box with those tricks." If you do feel comfortable and WANT to do that for him, learn how to deepthroat consistently, and then slowly start doing it a bit faster until you can handle it. Come up to breathe whenever you air and have a safe word or a safe tapping pattern (in case your mouth is otherwise occupied at the time) like the "*Shave and a haircut, two bits!*" Jingle (what me and my gf use when I'm holding her down and she wants air). The girl has just a little less control here than she does when you're in her vagina, because while she can stop things, she can't speak up, so pre-facefuck both parties need to be clear what signals to look for and what they mean, and then during the face fuck the fuckee has to be very on point with signals and the fucker has to be VERY attentive. All that said he's gotta stop with the weird attempts at convincing you, idk the guy fully but from how he communicates sexuality it sounds like he likes an awful lot for you to hear about HIS tastes, but when yours come up its a subject of debate and he can prove you wrong. Don't fall into that trap. Him comparing you to his ex is flagrantly manipulative and he definitely doesn't deserve any throat game for at least a while for that comment. He could have been doing it to demonstrate you get used to it but he's gotta be way more careful about the wording in that case, because he was all around kinda shitty about this.
who the fuck is like yeah you may vomit it's no big deal and expect you to still be in the mood
"he said vomiting is normal" As a man, dump him.
Put on a strap on and face fuck him ... He may not like it in the beginning but eventually he will love it. If he cannot eventually find it pleasing .. then you also are perfectly normal to not find it pleasing .
if you dont like it just say no, if your boyfriend wants to do things that you dont enjoy then what does that say about him?
Maybe I'm reading into this too much, but it sounds like your BF is trying to get you to keep doing new things he sees in porn. There is absolutely no reason you need to keep submitting to his ideas. Try them once if you want to, but if you don't like something, stop doing it. There is no reason you need to learn how to enjoy face fucking just because you BF wants to do it.
If I don’t like anything sexual and vise versa my fiancé and I respect each other.(i.e. I like having my hair pulled but it makes my fiancé uncomfortable so I respect that he does not want to do it and I don’t ask him to even though it feels good to me.) It doesn’t hurt to try something once but it does hurt to force someone to continue doing something they expressed that they dislike, especially sexually.
I’m sorry but your boyfriend sounds really manipulative
I don't know where he thinks vomiting is normal. I've been faced fucked by guys before, I enjoy it but I always tap them to stop when it's getting too much and then after depending on how I feel afterwards we continue or move into something else If you don't like it now, you probably aren't going to in the future. You might learn to tolerate it but only doing it for his pleasure and not yours is not something you have to tolerate. If you want to stop, then tell him this isn't for you. If he truely cares about you then I'll live without it. Maybe you can revisit it later and give it another try but you don't have to find ways to make something you're not comfortable doing or dislike more enjoyable for him.
It’s not for everyone, don’t feel like you have to do something you hate it will end up sucking even more for you in the long run.
My observation: if a man wants oral sex, that man wants to humiliate a woman. A man gets pleasure from feeling superior to a woman. I'm a man and it doesn't turn me on. I follow other men and get interesting experiences. More observations: if a man gets offended because a woman refuses or "doesn't suck properly", then this is a red flag. Such a man is aggressive by nature. If you don't like oral sex, you can't make it pleasant. Avoid men who have such desires.
Tell him that your new kink is penis chewing and CBT. See if he reciprocates or if your relationship is a one-sided facefuckfest. You’ll learn something, about him, about you. Might be worth it
I [M] have never done this, but I sincerely can't imagine it feels any better than just a normal.blowjob, so I think the thrill in this would be in talking you into doing something you dont really want to do. A bad sign.
“before he convinced me to have sex” (you didn’t want to do it and he kept pushing). “his ex didn’t like it at first but keep doing it and it’ll get easier” (shaming and more pressure). “vomiting is normal” (it’s not.) i’ve done face fucking with my fwb and if i even give the slightest gag he lets up. it’s not supposed to be forceful enough to induce vomiting feeling. sounds like this guy has pressured you in your sex life this whole time. to the curb he goes.
Vomiting is *not* normal. If that is part of his kink and you aren’t comfortable with it, you are entitled to say no, full stop. It’s disturbing that he would keep trying to go through with knowing how uncomfortable it makes you.
He's pressuring you to do something that you're not comfortable with. That is NOT okay. Also, you could aspirate from vomiting in that position. You may want to rethink your relationship with this man.
He sounds like the type that will keep pressuring you and slowly pushing your boundaries, and the instance you either say no, or he gets bored, cheat on you. He's already showing a ton of red flags. I'd leave before he convinces you to do more things you don't feel comfortable with.
No, making the other person vomit is NOT normal. Anyone trying this should start off slow. If you don't like it though, you are not obligated to do it. Both people should find some kind of pleasure in what they're doing or not do it at all. Be careful.
Take it slow at first. The shit in porn isn't always enjoyable in real life. My boyfriend does fuck my face but not as aggressively as in porn, and when we first did it he was extremely slow and gentle. You don't have to give up all the control in the situation. You can ask him not to go deep, you can ask him to slow down, you can take breaks. And at the end of the day you can choose not to do it at all.
If he can't understand your discomfort, it's time to throw him in the dumpster fire he's trying to spread.
'before he convinced me to have sex...' this guy sounds absolutely horrible and disrespectful and he's trying to treat you like a sex doll, I hope you can dump him and come to discover it's not supposed to be like that.
Dump the jerk
He already convinced you into sex taking your most prized possession
circling back tho, he convinced you to have sex? i’d encourage you to have a serious look at what happened, because coercion isn’t consent. Only do what you’re comfortable with < 3
Convinced to lose your virginity is a no no. Things will not go well from here. You're your own advocate, what you are "convinced" to do will keep being pushed even way past breaking you. Homeboy sucks. Be careful.
Tell him to go into porn and ditch normal relationships if this is what he wants to do. Porn consumption in all its glory, destroying men and their sexuality.
I'm concerning about the fact that he "convinced " you yo have sex for the first time. To me sort of sounds like he sort of pushed it to happen. If he was a caring partner he would have waited till you were ready. Also he started exposing you to his kinks with you basically being new to sex. Sounds to me he's looking for a sexdoll who breathes and he can use to his hearts contempt. You don't owe your partner sex. If they make it a chore for you it will become unpleasant.....
Probably an unpopular opinion. Nothing wrong his kink. I'm saying that because people are shaming the kink. It's personal preference. I'm a girl and I enjoy face fucking. It's a big turn on. The key with any kink is always that both people actually enjoy it and want to do it. If you dont want to do it, you should say no and he should respect that. Sometimes people do throw up during this particular activity. I have a couple times. I usually actually stop eating several hours beforehand, only water, just in case. Face fucking is a typical aspect of sex for me so I do what I need to do. It rarely happens that I throw up, but it happens and can be more likely if my stomach is full, as I feel it triggers my gag reflex significantly more than usual. Plus it's obviously not appealing to throw up food. That is my experience. Yes, with practice you will learn to control your gag reflex making vomiting a rare thing. And you will figure other things out that work for you. Is it normal? He probably meant that it doesnt bother him. It's normal, if that's what you like. I've had partners that like that. Or simply think it's fine. I usually try to avoid throwing up. It definitely doesnt add anything to the experience for me lol. I will add that if he is coercing you or pressuring you, in any way to do any sexual activity whatsoever, that is not right. You should do things because you want to and when you're ready. And he should respect that. So if he is the kind of guy that pressures you into things, walk away.
Your man really tried to shame you into having sex with him and commiting to his kinks by calling you vanilla? Yea, no thanks.
Vomiting is not normal. Porn is not normal. If you based your sex lot around what is in porn your gonna be disappointed more often than not. If you don’t want it don’t do it. If he continues to insist kick him in the dick and move on
Sounds like a terrible guy. The fact that he compared you to his ex and mentioned she was willing to do it is a major red flag.
just do a little meth and let that throat get destroyed