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oyebilly

Wait until they find out what’s in salt


MirrorUniverseCapt

Chlorine gas and a metal that EXPLODES when water touches it.


awol_83

MY GOD! AND YOU SCIENCE PEOPLE LET US EAT THAT?!


Batnaman_26

Why did I read this in Peter Griffin's voice


awol_83

I'm basically Peter Griffin


Pineapple0n_Steroids

They let us drink a substance one atom away from becoming a toxic teeth whitening agent


awol_83

Alright that's it, something has to be done about these science witches!


MilkiestMaestro

A statistical 100% of people who ingest dihydrogen monoxide develop cancer if they don't first die of something else


MirrorUniverseCapt

Something must be done about big H2O pushing this on us!!!!


Barkers_eggs

Dihydrogen monoxide is present in all victims of drowning


Toxic-and-Chill

This is indisputable


whill-wheaton

Damn hydric acid


ThisUsernameIsRarted

explosive 😋


Val_Hallen

And it's a fucking rock.


Canadaguy78

jesus, marie, they're minerals.


Xzelf

Yes and lead is 1 proton away from gold so buy my old ass pipes for a small fortune


OG_Alleszocker

Butter is made out of atoms, but so is the hair on my ass


peachesgp

But how well does your ass hair spread?


GreatSivad

I was going to make a joke about "spreading cheeks" but I don't want to reread the TOA and get banned.


IWipeWithFocaccia

TOA? Table of Asses?


GreatSivad

Terms of arguments


DigitalMunky

What happen to calling it consent?


GreatSivad

I'm sure ANY joke I make about THIS would smack me with the ban stick.


DigitalMunky

I thought you said agreement and I can’t read


TheAnalsOfHistory-

Don't worry, I'll spread them for you.


GreatSivad

Thanks! You are a gentleman and a scholar.


Remove_Extra

Oh. Yes. Sorry. *hangs up* that was a woman. Very low voice, probably a smoker.


jbuckets44

You can get banned without needing to read it! ;-)


Delerium89

>how well does your ass hair spread? Not as well as his ass


[deleted]

Adam ass hair!! Marvels newest ant-ass-man


DavidCRolandCPL

[Ted Lasso](https://youtu.be/pnP4KbfbxJ4?si=AYJQtU8DAqM-c00p)


Ferihehehaha

You just need to add a few protons, how hard it could be?


PranavYedlapalli

Just one more proton bro, I promise we'll fix the periodic table


Slikkeri

geniune question, how hard would it be (idk chemistry at all so just interested lol)


SnooOpinions6959

Its been done, but the process requires too much energy to be profitable


justinian416

It would cost a large fortune to make that small fortune.


BigJules74

Just like me buying and selling stocks.


TundieRice

Yep, so basically alchemy is 100% scientifically possible, it was just stupid for the ancients to attempt, lol.


MEEZETTE

Was it though? I mean, if it wasn't for ambitious alchemists, we may have not learned of things we have today. Chinese alchemists were trying to make an elixir for eternal life and ended up creating black powder, that's not stupid. That's science at its core. They observed, they thought on what they saw, they thought on what could be, they questioned what is, they experimented, they produced results, they went over their results, they learned. Scientific thoughts are supposed to be able to fail, it must be falsifiable, otherwise it's just absolute fiction.


Buttercup59129

Its like building a skyscraper to catch a bird. Lol


pikkstein

We can make gold in particle colliders at rates exceeding 1 million atoms per second, which may sound impressive, but in order to get a moll of gold (which would weigh ~197g), even if we could produce 10 million atoms per second, the machine would have to be running for ~6*10^17 seconds, which is about 20 billion years, and that's longer than the Universe has been around.


Adkit

So what are we waiting for? Let's start making some gold!


GRAIN_DIV_20

The best time to make a gold particle collider was 20 billion year ago, but the second best time is right now


SuperLowEffortTroll

The second best time would have been 19.9999999 billion years ago.


CarnivalOfSorts

LESS TALKING! MORE COLLIDING!


Quiri1997

Extremely. Adding protons to a nucleus is extremely difficult as both have the same electric charge and repel each other (think of trying to connect two magnets by the same pole and you get an idea of the kind of force, but multiplied by a factor), not to mention how difficult It is to get a source of protons in the first place.


beachymartini

I got you with the protons. Just remove the electron from a hydrogen atom and you get protons. Easy 😉


solonit

I have a good feeling this idea will surely explode in the scientific community!


Qilapid

You just fold them in, David


Quiri1997

![gif](giphy|idljdFb6h52OwuoKhQ|downsized)


kfmush

If you buy this person's lead pipes, I'll sell you a jar of protons for $1000. Get ready to make that bag, bitch!


donsimoni

I ~~hate~~ love to be that guy, but you would actually need to remove three protons from lead to end up with gold. And a couple of neutrons, otherwise the core won't be stable. The others have already pointed out that it needs a shitload of energy (as we say in science). To make the process economically viable you need to get cheap energy. Try to find an unsupervised outlet at work or the airport and run your particle accelerator there. Always happy to help!


Xzelf

Ayo your answer must be buried under all the others but thanks for enlightening me!


grinning_imp

Turning plastic into margarine is the real “Magnum Opus” alchemists should be striving for.


squeddles

Found the alchemist


drewman301

Does anyone know where I can buy any spare protons?


M2rsho

Just wait some time it will turn into gold eventually


Just_Maintenance

Margarine is made from the same subatomic particles as rat poison!!!!!!


MorrisBrett514

So THAT'S why my rat poison tastes like butter!


alexd1993

If your rat poison tastes like butter it's probably expired. I'd recommend getting a new bottle.


MorrisBrett514

Pro tip^


Fizzel87

If a poison is expired, is it more or less effective?


mothman475

depends on what it’s made of


halloni

What if its made of butter?


Stovlari

Then it’s probably not poison


PrincessRTFM

But that would explain the taste, at least...


StudentOk4989

But then it can become poison.


RizzoTheSmall

I can't believe it's not warfarin!


Bobll7

Fun fact, rat poison (warfarin) is used as a blood thinner for those that receive mechanical heart valves….


9x12BoxofPeace

Yup. I think (recall) that it causes all bodily fluids to drain from the rodent, leaving those dessicated corpses one might find in the walls. Good for not stinking, but probably bad (painful) for the poor creature.* *A quick google provided the following facts: 1. "causing internal bleeding that results in a slow and painful death" (that's not good...), and 2. Apparently the use of anticoagulents such as wafarin is declining because rodents are becoming immune. As well it is becoming restricted in some geographical areas because of wildlife such as birds and squirrels can easily eat it and die. That is today's podcast of 'Fun With Poison'!


EleutheriusTemplaris

Nooooooooo 😱


Current-Professor176

Can't Believe It's Not Rat Poison


djackson404

Dihydrogen monoxide will KILL you if you inhale it, yet the two-thirds of the Earth is COVERED in it -- and human-caused climate change means MORE of the Earth will be covered in it, Real Soon Now! **Call your government representative TODAY and DEMAND that dihydrogen monoxide be BANNED!**


cjc160

The exact same quarks


magicwuff

Strange


angryitguyonreddit

I hear its made of protons, neutrons, and electrons. Which is in nuclear waste so its like you're eating radioactive waste


Eh-I

Rats are made of some of the same things as rat poison!


Aggravating_Tax5392

99% of people sharing this meme don’t know what a molecule is


SupaStaVince

You're a molecule


SexyOldManSpaceJudo

Your mom's a molecule.


MirrorUniverseCapt

See? They do know what molecules are.


Chained_Prometheus

That's like the opposite of a " your mum is so fat, she ..." Joke


EpicOweo

Specifically she's a carbohydrate


Competitive-Peanut79

There are more atoms in a molecule of water than there are stars in the entire solar system.


djackson404

>There are more atoms in a molecule of water than there are stars in the entire solar system. There's way too much to unpack in that statement if you're the average 90-IQ person in this Country, but you full-well knew that when you posted it.


Bobll7

Mol et Cule is the French version of Mort and Ricky is it not?


Ash-MacReady

How very molecule of you to say.


DuhImDave

Try our EXTRA BIGASS TACO! Now with more MOLECULES


samgam74

It’s been a long time since I took chemistry, but I’m pretty sure saying something is one molecule away from something else is completely meaningless.


Me_Beben

"If my grandmother had wheels she would've been a bike"


G4D_Sunshine

I know what this is from and I appreciate you


bunnymen69

If a frog had wings he wouldnt bump his ass when he hopped


M44t_

Table salt is one molecule away from CHLORINE!!! It's poisonous!!


Kearskill

one atom away to be exact


jones5280

NA


jmanmac

Correct. And to top it off plastics are polymerized, so any given piece of commercial plastic has a massive range in both the amount of molecules within the plastic and the chain lengths of each plastic molecule. Not to mention what the hell this meme even means by plastic. There are many different kinds of "plastic" and the way they're using it isn't even technically correct, they're most likely referring to thermoforms


AltShortNews

It's not completely meaningless, but the message the image is trying to convey is stupid.


JasonPlattMusic34

Water is one atom away from hydrogen peroxide, so these people should just stop drinking water


Klogginthedangerzone

Maybe they should start drinking hydrogen peroxide.


Educational-Can-2653

Water is made out of explosives used as rocket fuel. Do you really want to drink that ???


MrStoneV

And see what water does to metal! IT CORRODES THE METAL. HOW CAN I GIVE THIS TO MY KIDS???


Croian_09

Every year, thousands of people die from inhalation of dihydrogen monoxide. So why do they allow it in our food and beverages?


SantaMonsanto

Yes yes we all saw these jokes coming. The real question is where do I find a butter knife with those little holes on the backend like a cheese grader that makes little butter curlies?


BLYNDLUCK

Finally someone asking the important questions.


TimonAndPumbaAreDead

https://www.microplane.com/butter-blade


astrologicaldreams

butter curlies lol


Wide_Frosting7951

Why is there nobody talking about this incredible perforated butter knife? Never seen it before.


TheArmchairSkeptic

I used to have one, it looks brilliant in theory but is basically useless in practice. It doesn't work if the butter is too cold to spread, and isn't necessary when the butter is warm enough to be spreadable.


RugerRedhawk

That is THE question for this thread. Nothing interesting about the post, but that knife is amazing.


MabMass

Also, starch, cellulose, and chitin are all glucose polymers, so eating a potato is basically the same as as eating a log. /s


GrandPriapus

David Avocado Wolfe is a loon.


Sargatanus

Is he still around? I thought he faded into obscurity years ago.


WeatherfordCast

He is unfortunately. He posts these super low effort pictures that are meant to appeal to the most people. He’s a run of the mill engagement farmer.


Sargatanus

Gross. But on the bright side, I guess it means my social media filters are doing their job.


ThePopDaddy

And he panders to the anti-vax anti-"woke" crowd.


tw_693

I thought this was a Food Babe post at first


MaxxtheKnife

There's a name I haven't heard for a loooong time.


KombatDisko

My name is one word away from being Carl


theCOORN

Hi Car


syfiarcade

Me on my way to take one molecule out of my margarine


Idiotaddictedto2Hou

WATER is one atom away from hydrogen peroxide. Bon appétit!


IHasH0rns

You really shouldn't eat margarine on a daily basis though.


TGOTR

I prefer butter myself


[deleted]

[удалено]


TGOTR

I'm too slippery


Goodmorning_RandomU

isn't margarine just solid vegetable oil?


_IncrediPaul_

Hydrogenated oil. It's really unhealthy. Full-fat, grass-fed butter is the way to go


Goodmorning_RandomU

thank you so much


[deleted]

[удалено]


phil24jones

Yeah but butter’s nice


DarkSkyKnight

This is outdated advice; butter is fine in moderation. Olive oil is just even better. But the thing is butter is resistant to oxidation which makes it more reliable in high-heat cooking; with olive oil high heat creates some toxic compounds. \*Grass-fed\* butter (non grass-fed is not that good) also has a much better 6:3 ratio than vegetable oils: [https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/optimize-omega-6-omega-3-ratio](https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/optimize-omega-6-omega-3-ratio) If you scroll down you'll see a bar graph. From there it's clear that olive oil has the best balance between low saturated fats (which is fine, but just not the best-in-class) and low Omega-6. Butter has the lowest Omega-6, which comes at the expense of lower MUFAs. What you want is low Omega-6 and more MUFAs; butter is clearly better than a lot of vegetable oils, but olive oil is just better. However, you should sooner eliminate oils like soybean oil before thinking about eliminating butter. Personally I'd always prioritize EV olive oil, unless it's high-heat cooking, then I'd choose either butter or avocado oil.


[deleted]

[удалено]


DarkSkyKnight

That is absolutely not true. Alcohol is not fine in moderation; even very minor amounts of alcohol ingestion is associated with increased health risks. That is not true for butter; some amount of butter has zero association with health risks. That is because alcohol has a toxic chemical compound naturally, and no amount of it is safe for the liver. Butter has chemical compounds - specifically saturated fats - that are only a problem when you consume too much of it. Alcohol is something you should simply consume exactly zero of. Butter is something you need to consume in a way that balances against the rest of your fat consumption portfolio. One is black and white, one isn't. One is an on-off switch. The other has to be considered in a wider context of: are you balancing your Omega6-3 ratio? Are you consuming enough DHA, which can only be efficiently acquired through animal compounds? Are you consuming enough Omega9, which is best acquired through plant-based seeds and oils? Are the fats you are consuming satiating for your diet? The pathway of acetaldehyde in the body is well understood and it's well understood how it's carcinogenic. Meanwhile, the conversation around nutrition in general is still being deepened by nuance every day: [https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0735109720356874?via%3Dihub](https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0735109720356874?via%3Dihub) (this is not cherrypicking; JACC is top field journal).


darthhue

I don't think there's any reason to eat margarine. Butter is both healthier and better tasting


cocaine_blood_bath

I use it occasionally to cook with. Butter burns in scenarios where margarine does not.


emd07

It's cheaper


HistoricalSherbert92

I don’t trust atoms, they make up everything.


MedicalConference860

Where do I find that butter knife


grw313

Just wait until she hears about enantiomers.


RealBishop

I’ll be sure not to spill my bowl full of molecules into my margarine then.


Firkraag-The-Demon

I mean if you want to argue about shared ingredients, the classic example is salt being made out of sodium, which explodes in water, and chlorine, a poisonous gas.


Scottyboy1214

Table salt is half explosive and half toxic gas.


shadowwesley77

My fucking dad says this all the time and it pisses me off. I usually fire back saying that salt is one atom away from being a poison gas and a metal that explodes in water.


Lanceo90

Person who made the meme should start drinking hyrogen peroxide. Its H2O2, clearly just water with some extra oxygen, gotta be good for you.


Val_Hallen

The people that make and share this shit are the same people that bitch and moan about chemicals. Not specific chemicals. Just chemicals. They feel if they can't pronounce it, it's bad. Things like polyacetylenes, falcarinol, falcarindiol, pyrrolidine, hydroxymellein, methoxymellein, eugenin, trimethoxybenzaldehyde, and acetoxy-heptadeca. They sound super-duper scary. But those are all chemical compounds found in regular ass carrots. The people that say this shit are always, always, always either trying to sell you something or they have bought into something. And they don't have the basic, grade school science education to know that chemicals are everything outside of base elements.


[deleted]

Plastic glove are almost grape soda and hot sauce mixed together but that doesn’t mean they taste like it


throwaway1200030018

Oxygen is only 237 atoms away from plutonium! Don't breath!


lasagne42069

Ok sure it's bs but I think we can all agree that margarine is terrible


goldencrayfish

Guys, the main ingredient in Coca Cola is just *one atom* away from being super corrosive hydrogen peroxide!


aforsberg

yeah but check out that dope-ass butter knife, never seen one like that!


[deleted]

ok thats a sick butter knife tho


SpaceLemur34

"One molecule" Water is one molecule away from nitroglycerin.


cal93_

coal is made of the same stuff as diamonds!!!🤑🤑🤑


Le_Turtle_God

Humans share half their DNA with a banana and 97% with rats.


JAY_F_ING_TV07

Air is one molecule away from being carbondioxide


Happy-Personality-23

Wait till this guy learns about Nial Red and the food stuffs he makes from gloves and toilet paper


Why_am_I_here033

This says a lot about the state of american education.


DevilPixelation

Yeah, and we share half of our genetic traits with bananas, so we’re all half banana.


ADWAFANDW

The maker of this meme shares 98% of their DNA with monkeys


dikothesiko

So what you’re saying is… paint is almost edible


Explorers_bub

OMG, mom says this crap. Peroxide is only one atom away from water, but don’t try drinking 8-8oz glasses a day.


Reejis99

That butter knife is kinda neat though


ranger0293

That's how the margarine manufacturers make their product. They buy a couple gallons of yellow paint from the Sherwin Williams down the street, then they mix one part paint with one part molecules, stir vigorously, salt to taste, and out comes margarine.


orangepalm

How is no one blown away by that cool knife thing? What is it? Like a cheese grater for butter. I want


Achilles_der_V

Water (H2O) is one atom away from being deadly poisionous (H2O2)


spoopy_and_gay

water is only one molecule away from hydrogen peroxide, and you wouldn't drink hydrogen peroxide?


rycklikesburritos

That's a sweet butter knife though.


VirtualMage

And water is just one atom away from hydrogen peroxide!


Hatfmnel

That knife is pretty cool


Jazzlike_Relief2595

And water is both nuclear waste and one molecule away from being hydrogen peroxode


Ap3hang3r

Margarine still sucks


xxx_pussslap-exe_xxx

Margarine might as well be plastic considering how foul it is


LimpAd5888

I got into two day debate with this guy on his Facebook page because he was "explaining the benef6" of raw food. I showed so much evidence on how, especially raw meat, is actually incredibly unhealthy for us. It ended with me calling his "education " worth as much as a fart in a tornado.


goldencrayfish

Im more interested in this butterknife with a spaghettification tool


mechant_papa

Your body is 60% water. That does not make you soup.


squoinko

I'm made from the same kind of protons as crack cocaine


Far-Host7803

Wait until they find out what cancer is made of...


Stein_um_Stein

These are the people that complained about Hg in vaccines. It's like complaining about sodium metal Na in table salt.


Parker1055

Encyclopedia says other wise OP


Final-Bench1859

Margarine is still garbage tho


BiggerMouthBass

The same molecules in my Johnson are also in your mom’s mouth!


L30n_06

and methanol has one carbon atom less than alcohol


PlanetKi

Cool butter knife though.


DrakenDaskar

Wth is an ingredient? We are on a mulecular level over here.


tsimen

I low-key want that butter knife though


Giubeltr

This is an old fact, at the time it was hydrogened fat like the animal based saturated fat (butter)... Now its mainly plant based non-hydrogeneted fat, but fat still bad for health...


WhimWhamWhazzle

Am I the only one impressed by this knife? I've never seen anything like it


SuperBoop11

And water is one atom away from Peroxide. Wanna quit that too?


No-Wonder1139

Water is only one molecule away from hydrogen peroxide


DreadedChalupacabra

You share 99% of the same genes with a chimpanzee, that doesn't mean you're gonna hire one to babysit.


Calm_Leek_1362

Water is an atom away from pure hydrogen, which is explosive, and hydrogen peroxide, which is toxic.


piglungz

I NEED the knife in the picture, would save so much time trying to let the butter thaw out


XxRocky88xX

Water is 3 molecules away from hydrogen peroxide and shares its core molecules with almost every toxin known to man


ThoroughSix7

We share 60% of our DNA with a banana so I am 60% banana


[deleted]

Both you and that margarine are made of stardust. Cannibal.


CollapsedPlague

Table salt is made of two things that would kill you on their own.


phish_biscuit

Quick someone tell them water is in many industrial chemicals so these morons die faster