OP, hold up...how are you 26 but in one post 2 years ago you said you were 20 and in another post from 2 years ago you say you're 23, and then 24, all within 2 years?
The f*cking lack of common logic is astounding bro 😭😂 how do they get dressed in the morning if they can’t see through something this obvious?
I’m not about victim blaming, but I’m also cautious about who I consider a victim. This person is only going to be a victim of their own decisions in the end and that’s usually a more painful reality than the abuse itself.
that movie won awards for Worst Screenplay, Worst Actor (x2), Worst Director (x2), Worst Picture (x2), Worst On-screen Couple (x2) and Most Painfully Unfunny Comedy. it got a 10% on Rotten Tomatoes and 13/100 on Metacritic
in other words, this guy pulled some shitty things and tried to mend his relationship by offering her a shitty movie
Those awards and reviews are bs. It deserves so much better. That whole movie exists simply because MTV wanted Tom Green to make a movie and he didn’t want to. So he compromised and made them a movie so bad they’d regret forcing him to make it.
It’s always possible that they forced him to make a movie at a time when he was trying to get more prominent in cinema and he made something to “punish” them for their forced labour and it so happened to match up with the humour of his contemporary MTV show.
It reads more like a lazily repeated factoid though
Looks like it's shared by an app. Probably his lazy way of asking her to watch a movie with him. You basically just press the "share" button and select who to share to, and the app writes the text and link.
Get yourself to the point where you ~~have enough self respect that you won't ever need to ask yourself this question.~~ can enjoy watching Freddy Got Fingered in the company of yourself.
Hopefully, you figure it out before he gives you something you can't get rid of... Seriously. "Texted" prostitutes? I'd have a hard time believing that's as far as it went, and with him being broke, I'd be pissed at spending money on sex workers for messages or sex.
That's a huge risk if there is anything in person... Some sex workers take all precautions to stay safe, but that doesn't guarantee he wouldn't bring something home to you to live with forever.
It also feels manipulative to have him making it about him hating himself instead of what he did.
Please read my comments. Why are you wasting time self-deprecating and writing responses rather than doing the only thing you should do? Block him. He just knows you’ll be back eventually and it’s written all over the wall by reading those texts. You gotta leave for YOU at this point. The minute you gotta wonder whether he’s hurt because you blocked him, or whether you think he’s changed now, you’re just throwing your life away yet again. At least being single doesn’t have the risk of ruining all future relationships for the rest of your life by doing this irreversible damage to your cognition. It’s so much more than time you’re wasting, and you’re never gonna see what you deserve by continuing down this path. It’s really sad that some girls just think they deserve this
*****no shame to anyone in the industry, you do what you have to do to survive**** if he’s as broke as he’s coming off, it’s possible that if (key word)any in person happen it was with someone on the lower end of rates. People in extremely desperate situations (aka those who would be charging the really low rates) are way more likely to be willing to do much riskier things like unprotected sex etc if the money is right.
There’s really no way for OP to be 100% sure that she isn’t being exposed to anything. Can’t prove or disprove for a fact whether or not he did or didn’t do anything physical. And the texting alone is enough indication that it is at the very least a possibility. Your health will always matter more than a relationship.
Yh you should never take him back if you do it's saying it's OK for him to treat you like shit and physical fights massive red flag all it takes is him to be in a mood and keep his hand round your neck a second to long or hit u u fall and hit your head.. u are worth more than that.. be by yourself build urself up and when u love yourself that much find someone worthy of ur time and love who doesn't cheat on u or abuse you.
I would leave because of my health anxiety. Once I know you’re actively trying to sleep with other people, especially prostitutes, I’m gone cause ain’t no way I’m about to end up with a life long disease over a dumbass boy.
That’s mostly because they are terminally online… social media as a whole only shows you negative stuff for the most part because that gets clicks. That’s terrible for your mental health.
Yeah for sure. In 2021 I went through a horrible break up. I spent way too much time online. My New Year’s resolution was to stop using social media and travel. In February I deleted all my apps. Within 2 weeks I went from barely leaving the bed to a totally different person. Now I’m engaged and in live in a new country with tons of friends and new experiences.
I had the issue in the past where I essentially lived online. I worked online, played online, spoke to most of my friends strictly online. I was online for 16-20 hours a day.
My mental health tanked until I ultimately had to just walk away. I quit my job and started working somewhere that forced me to interact with people. I started doing outdoor hobbies. I started convincing local friends to do small weekend trips and fishing days. It got us all outside more and disconnected.
Totally different person as a result. I ended up going from no direction and depressed not knowing where my life would be in 5 years to being in a healthy relationship, having much closer friends, owning a business, and having two college degrees.
Sometimes you really just have to disconnect.
I don’t have to look at the texts. You saying you fought physically is enough for me to say you need to leave each other alone. And maybe call the cops.
First slide I already thought that yes you, were stupid.
But then the "I'll drop weed off to your mom"
followed by "cigarettes?"
Then to "watch Freddy got fingered"
Weirdest complication of texts by a deranged bozo ever. OP please have some self love.
Ofc, you’re too good for that shit like… pls pls have love and respect for yourself before you share it with another person! I’m sure you know its wrong too because you’re asking Reddit!
And pls pls pls don’t sleep with him without an STD test at the very minimum!! You don’t know where he was or who he was with! 😭💕💕
Physically fighting a women is more get expelled territory, not just held back imo. That’s a line every decent man or boy knows you just never cross for any reason.
Physical fighting in my past relationship was me blocking her until she hurt herself or got tired and stopped hitting me. I’ve never hit a woman but I’ve had plenty hit me and throw stuff at me and this whole idea that men shouldn’t defend themselves is rather stupid. My ex came at me with a kitchen knife once because I was trying to leave the house and get away from her. We argued, she told me to leave, I grabbed my bag, and she changed her mind. Domestic violence isn’t exclusive to women.
Tbh I agree, no decent person should ever hit or intentionally hurt their partner :(
If someone ever does that to a person or if a person ever does that to someone else, there is no love in that relationship. No matter how much they apologize or say they didn’t mean it.
Toxicity can resemble addiction. We don’t always know how to leave, even if it seems simple to the outside world. Try not to judge and offer helpful advice. Would you speak to a human in pain like this in person? Likely not. Be kind. Do better please.
Didn’t even need to read the screenshots to say “yes”. Hopefully you’re just looking for people to help you get the strength to leave. So. Consider this one of those replies.
Yes you are. Wake tf up. This man has issues, you CANT fix. You’ll never be able to fix them for him. He’s an adult, as are you. Leave this man nowwwwww.
Adding onto that, yeah unlikely these issues could ever get fixed. If he put in a concerted effort into self work then there’s a *chance* he’d improve. But there *isn’t* a chance it’s going to happen with you there.
Staying with him is enabling the behavior. He has deep-routed issues and he isn’t going to legitimately consider working through them unless he hits rock bottom first; the kind of bottom where he spends some time feeling desperate and alone. That’s when people make these kinds of changes—IF they’re going to at all.
...and that was him on his best behaviour, trying to win his gf back.
Your bar is in hell OP, seriously your life will be actual fucking hell if you stay with this loser. Dig up a little self respect and leave.
Babes, with love, if for no other reason, this could be very very bad for your physical health. He could give you diseases, some incurable. Please run, don’t walk.
Seriously? You seriously have to ask this question. He cheated on you. He spent his money on sex. He could catch and STI and give it to you. He does NOT love you. He will still have sex with prostates. He will never stop. You staying with him is the stupidest choice you could make. And PHYSICALLY he was violent? Girl. Come on. Wake up. Have some self respect and block him. Don’t be a coward.
Oh man, the fight, the prosties and threats of self harm. That's a manipulator right there. You gotta ditch and make sure he can't contact you afterward. He'll pull the love you's, I'm getting better and self harm thing again and you'll be back there.. just go, please.
I wouldn't call you stupid, but I will say that you don't love yourself if you stay with him. He does not love you. His actions said that loud and clear, and now he's trying to manipulate you with guilt by threatening to hurt himself. Love yourself, Op. Leave him and fall in love with you again.
You’re not stupid, you need to heal your attachment / trauma wounds and work on loving yourself before dating again.
Seek professional help. What happened will happen again and again and if you stay he’ll make sure to hide it.
Until he hits her or cheats on her again. He doesn't love himself, so he surely doesn't and can't truly love her. They're reflections of one another. Can't be with someone that low if you're not that low yourself... yanno?
Great advice, though. I agree wholeheartedly.
Just spend some time with yourself. Loving yourself. Be your own parent... think of how a loving parent should take care of their child and take care of yourself that way. Do fun things, join groups that you enjoy, try to improve your health, work on whatever you need to work on... then you'll attract better options. Also, like the previous commenter said: *therapy*... you should try to figure out what the root of the issue is to why you keep going back.
This current guy is your lesson to look back on and be proud of yourself for overcoming whatever it is that he provides or has that keeps bringing you down to his level. He's like an anchor in the sea of life.
Best wishes.
It’s already bad that he cheated on you, but to add physical fighting on top of that…just one of those two things is reason enough to leave. The amount of work required to repair this, even just figuring out how to begin to repair this…will take years. I think the smart thing to do is cut your losses and leave.
He won you over and threw you away for a prostitute and you're asking if you're stupid for staying? Are you waiting for him to bring home an incurable STD to you?
Girl let him kill himself and yes you ARE stupid if you stay with him fr girl the bar is in hell and he’s rotting in the pits of the 7th circle 🙄 do better this man does not love you put yourself first fuck, the love you want comes from within
Manipulation.
He told you he's going to hurt himself to get you to forgive him and get back with him. It's manipulation.
Texting prostitutes, verbal and physical abuse and now emotional manipulation.
It's up to you if you stay with him but don't expect any support system to keep helping after you make that choice.
So your boyfriend texts prostitutes, probably has cheated, you guys have physically fought and he manipulates you by saying he’s going to hurt himself. God knows what else.
It will only get worse, it will never get better. Leave now so you don’t find yourself in this same situation 5 years from now. You’re wasting your time and life being in this relationship.
She said in a comment he also tells her all the time she's pathetic. Just a cycle of mental and physical abuse with some love bombing sprinkled in. Judging by the texts he sucks at the love bombing too
“I’ll be awesome at anything just to talk to you” lmao this entire text chain is soooo pathetic
This guy has no respect for you but what’s even more concerning is you have no respect for yourself. Please reconsider
Not stupid but you need to do what's best for you, and his disrespectful behavior in the relationship can not be ignored. He will continue to do it and find sneakier ways to hide what he is doing.
Also, start getting tested for stds/hiv. You have no idea what he has truly been doing and need to make sure you're still healthy
Just remember- nobody congratulates you for staying with a problematic person, and it only harms you and enables their bad behavior. Won’t tell you what to do, but I just personally wouldn’t.
All the people giving you tough love in the comments :,) you’re not stupid you’re just in an emotionally abusive relationship. Of course it’s not always like this and you probably hang on to little moments that tell you he cares, but I am here to tell you that this little boy does not give a fuck about you. He’s trying to make you feel bad for him when he was the one that fucked up. And I lowkey think he’s testing how much he can push your boundaries and see what he can get away with in this relationship without you leaving.
I read the texts, but they weren’t necessary. It would be a dumb move to stay. I am not trying to call *you* dumb, but the action of staying after he cheated/texted PROSTITUTES, physically fought you, and then is now manipulating you would be… not great. Get out immediately. Block him, don’t look back.
He is threatening to hurt himself because he is ugly and hates himself to win you back?
Can you see how he deflects from his total shit behavior and instead of saying ‘I’ll do better to be a good man, I’m sorry’ he makes it about you needing to rescue him because he is a shit person?
This is cyclical behavior. He will never accept responsibility. He will always make it your job to fix.
Be done with him.
You are not stupid, you are in love with a toxic person.
When you say you got in to a physical fight, what does that mean? In my world a fight is mutual physical violence between “equals”, if he was physically violent towards you, that’s abuse. To get to a point where you will be ready to leave him, you’ll need to call a spade a spade.
Threatening self harm is in page of of an abusers book. If he’s threatening to hurt himself, tell him that you will call the police to do a welfare check on him, but don’t engage further.
This person betrayed you, correct? And now he's emotionally manipulating you by threatening to hurt himself? I think you already know what we'll say. But here are my sincere questions: Why do you feel compelled to stay with this person? Are you looking for us to support you, or talk you out of it? And finally, if your best friend was in your position & told you this story about her boyfriend, what advice would you give her?
What in the Jerry Springer episode 321 did I just read?
Sorry. He got caught. His way of making amends is to either give your mom weed or hurt himself? If that isn’t redemption or affection I don’t know what is.
This whole time I’ve been giving my wife love and stability. Turns out I should have smoke out her, give her cigarettes and give her mom weed. AND I could be beating her and texting prostitutes (famously the best part about going to sex workers) while watching Freddy Got Fingered? Is she an idiot for staying?
That you are asking this question alone is a huge sign that you need to leave this entire situation behind. Your self respect is so low and you do deserve more
You said in another reply that, “it’s not always like this.” You need to realize it should NEVER be like this. This situation happening at all is a major red flag. You would be stupid to stay, yes. Leave him and don’t look back.
You’re not stupid. But threatening self harm to make someone stay is straight out of the abuser textbook. He is not sorry. He is sorry he got caught and is experiencing consequences. You deserve better.
This is seriously messed up. Point blank, you’d be stupid if you stay. This boy texted prostitutes, y’all got in a physical fight, and not to mention the things he said he’d do to “win you back,” are not things a man would say. Anyone who threatens or makes a comment about hurting themselves to get back with a partner is manipulating the hell out of you. The next time he says that to you, tell him you’re calling the cops over self/harm claims that you can back up with texts and watch him panic. If he says it again, tell him you will call the cops. He’s manipulating you to get you to come back instead of just accepting what he did and respecting whatever your decision is. You gotta get rid of this guy. I’m telling you he’s no good and he will do crap like this over and over. Do not let someone treat you like this and take them back. You have to set the standard for how you’ll be treated and how you won’t. You have to stand up for yourself because you’re the only one who can! What is it going to take for you to realize he’s not treating you the way you deserve to be treated, love? Doing all that is not love. You may love him, but love isn’t enough, especially when the other person treats you like shit! Girly, this is just going to be a vicious cycle until you say enough is enough.
I'm not going to say that you're stupid, but I will ask you why you are staying with someone who is making you question if you are stupid? Our hearts make us make stupid decisions. Don't listen to your heart in this situation listen to your head and gut...... you already know what you need to do.
You shouldn’t be there. It’s not a good thing for you or any attempt at recovery you’re making/potentially going to make. In fact, until you are able to be alone and feel like a productive member of society (however you do that, there are many ways) and see that you can depend on yourself for the things you need, you will probably struggle with realizing you’re worth more than this. Good luck with everything, from someone who’s been in a similar spot and has gotten out. You might not believe you have it in you, but you do. We all do. It’s whether or not we make the most difficult decisions to get there. I know the cards are stacked differently for different people, but it’s possible.
Btw, anyone, and I mean anyone in your life who is telling you they’re gonna hurt themselves in order to elicit a response, like you have any control over that, is manipulative and abusive, whether they mean to be or not.
Yes, leave. This is a trauma bond. Staying will only make it even harder to extricate yourself later.
I saw you mention elsewhere in these comments “It’s not always like this,” but in ANY healthy relationship the only answer you should ever be able to give is “It’s never like this.” Idc if t never were to happen again, once is too much. And if you are wrong and it happens again, there’s no saying it won’t be even worse what happens then.
Please don’t find out what that looks like.
I know the first step is hard but it is necessary. The steps after will get easier and easier. Let yourself find them. Nobody worth having does what you’ve been through.
This is a toxic relationship. Trust has been broken. Fight that has escalated to being physical. That is not ok. You should leave. Take a lot of time to yourself, think about what boundaries you want in a relationship, and enjoy getting to know yourself before dating again. I wish you the best ❤️
This boy cheats on you with prostitutes, then asks if he can make it up to you with weed. Are you fucking serious? The bar is 6 feet underground.
Stop saying things like "it's not always this bad"/"it's not always like this". You are enabling his behavior with that kind of language. If you were in a healthy relationship, you wouldn't have made this post in the first place. Sorry to be blunt but yes, you would be very stupid if you stayed. He isn't going to stop, and if he knows you will let this slide, he will be even shittier to you because you're not showing him that his poor choices have consequences.
Please dump this fucking idiot and learn to respect yourself. You deserve someone worlds better than this trash.
Edit: sorry, but gonna be blunt again. Get tested. I highly doubt texting is as far as it went.
I'm going to tell you a personal story about me and maybe it'll give you some perspective. Growing up my next door neighbor was my best friend even though she was a couple of years older than me. We lost touch for several years until I messaged her on FB, and long story short now we're married. Before we got together I was addicted to opiates for years and continued to do them after we got serious. She took me to the beach several hours away to propose to me, that's how good it was. I ended up getting worse and worse. Arguing all the time. Guilt trips from me etc. At my worst I was taking 10 30mg oxy. Then one day I wake up to see she had done gone to the store and bought me a tent and an air mattress and told me to get out. That was the catalyst to me getting help, and repaired my relationship.
8 years later I'm still clean and still in therapy.
Saying all of that, even at my worst I NEVER put my hands on her. I knew what I was doing was wrong, I never once said I'm going to hurt myself or put my hands on her, or even tried to cheat on her. And normally with addicts those are the go to. The difference was I actually cared about her. This guy doesn't give one shit about you. His apologies are even all about him, trying to buy his way out of it with drugs and cigarettes etc is not holding himself accountable. You need to get into therapy and learn what it is about you that makes you think any of this is ok. You deserve someone that can actually say I'm sorry, it was stupid. I feel like this, this and this and I'll do these steps to better myself
This guy is incapable of any of that
I mean this with love and respect but girl you’re being a fucking idiot. Like if you had a daughter or a close friend/loved one and the same situation, wouldn’t you be horrified and want better for them? You need to have that same standard for yourself. Internet strangers can’t want better for you than you do for yourself, ya know? Like i understand struggling with self worth and everything but holy shit there has to be some sort of limit, just a basic sense of self worth to where we aren’t staying with a giant man child who doesn’t treat you with a drop of respect. Why spend more time with someone who doesn’t value you?
Yeah he’s gaslighting you and manipulating you. He fucked yup and did wrong, but he’s trying to be the hurt one here by saying he’s going to hurt himself. And this is purely my opinion and based on my take of these messages. He’s not sorry. He’s upset he got caught. I fear he will do it again. You need to leave him and go watch that movie by yourself.
Dude. He cheated on you, y'all got into a physical fight, and he's obviously a fucking bum just based on these texts. Who gives a shit about this loser? Why is this even a question?
He physically assaulted you or you assaulted him, and now he’s trying to win you back with cigarettes and weed? You need to find your self value immediately. And you ain’t gonna find it talking to him. Stay away and give yourself a chance to discover your worth.
So he cheated or wanted to cheat but probably couldn't find anyone so he tried hiring sex workers. Doesn't matter if he says he loves you, those actions say he doesn't. If he loved you he'd only want you. And wouldn't fight you physically.. Are you ok? Did he hurt you?
If you have to ask a bunch of strangers on the internet if you’re stupid for staying in an abusive relationship I think you already know the answer to that.
You must really feel low of yourself. I’ve been there. It’s hard to leave and the honeymoon period after they fuck up and want you to not leave feels good because you’re love deprived. But it’s not real. Also you don’t love him. You love a made up version of him your mind has created for you. Take steps if possible to work out your own issues of why you stay. Try to do things for you. And even though leaving is hard it will be the right decision. If you stick to it and block him no matter what you will eventually thank your self hard in the future. If you stay this will be your entire life
girl he’s gonna give you HIV and then probably kill you too honestly. he’s extremely unhinged and it’s sad (pathetic) you don’t see the danger you’re in. good luck hopefully we don’t see you end up as another statistic.
You werent able to answer your own question when you were putting together this post? In the nicest way possible you need your own help for not realizing how easy of a decision this should be for you to move on.
My big girl attitude says there is no fixing this especially after you called him out on what he was doing & it became , **physical,** massive red flag.
However, petty, immature me is looking at the way he's offering you things to try to "make up" for what he did & i'd drain him completely then leave. lol
you need to respect yourself more. why the hell would you consider staying? how could you read all this over again and not feel disgusted and disrespected? yeah, it’s dumb to stay. don’t.
Ma'am. He was texting prostitutes and hit you when he got caught, and all it takes is "I'll smoke you out" to get you back???? Girl you know better. Do not do this. It WILL happen again. You don't need or deserve this. I promise you being on your own feels a lot better than being with a guy who cheats on you and hits you because he's mad that he got caught. This dude is a loser, I'm sorry. I know you think "but we love each other so much!," but this is not love, and when you find real love you will know that. You can buy your own weed. Get away from this dude.
I don't care to hear his sob story about poor him because he hates the way he looks and he's gonna hurt himself etc etc. The manipulation is REAL. Fuck that. That's his problem, he's a man and he can figure that out for himself. He is not your responsibility. These are all just excuses and manipulation tactics to make you come back, and I guess it's working. In what way is this relationship serving you? Because you need to ask yourself why you're okay with any of this
I had an ex who I found out would download Snapchat literally 2 out of the 7 days a week we weren’t together and paid for nudes / sent nudes to random girls… and in the same breath would complain he can’t buy me Dunkin 😣 I had to break up with him like the trust is broken and I can’t ever look past something like that. I don’t think you should either tbh. We also got into a physical-ish kind of fight and it should never ever get to that point and I think it isn’t possible to come back from honestly.
Edit: and when he had a new gf, he was still messaging me so I told her and she told me he was still cheating in a similar way when he was with her, so… no they don’t change!
He does love you. In his own pathetic, effed up way. But, love to him means you forgive him every time and do not hold him to a standard of behavior. His anger will be your fault. His depression will be your responsibility. Your love for him will always be on trial and need to be proven while his won’t need any actual outward expression.
I mean, sure, you could take him back if this role is one you want to sign up for
You already know nothing good is on the horizon. Play bad games, win bad prizes.
Edit: and looking at your post history, I can see you’re also trying to better yourself by getting sober and staying sober. The kinds of situations this man is going to get you into, are going to jeopardize all of that. Don’t give yourself this excuse (him) to self-sabotage down the line.
This is fucking crazy OP. Do you really hate yourself or something?
Aside from even the prostitutes and physical fight, he’s obnoxious: he won’t discuss it at all (just keeps saying “I love you”) and threatens to “hurt himself.” He’s manipulative.
With all due respect get your shit together
I feel sad for people like you. I've been forever single, but at least I don't have to deal with this kind of disrespect and disregard for my feelings.
Idk why wouldn't you leave someone who texted sex workers and fought you. Do you think that's something someone who loves you would do?
I don’t even need to see anything further after reading the post. It’s appalling that you can’t just type that question out to yourself and have an answer, and even more appalling that you have to take it to social media for clarity.
I think all you commenters should save your fingers. It’s a dead horse. If this chick hasn’t been logical enough to escape by now then I’m afraid your words won’t do anything except make her ignore him for a few days before crawling back.
I’m just curious, you DO know that the only person that is affected by your stupidity is you? You can scream from the rooftops how terrible this guy is, but you’re the one wasting YOUR life in the end. Nobody risks anything, not even him, compared to what you do. The fact that you’re trying to get others to agree with you instead of just doing what the best thing clearly would be (leaving and trying to regain some sense of normalcy if it isn’t too late for you to have a life now), makes me think you don’t understand that you’re the only one who loses here. You must thrive off the drama because I can’t think of another reason someone would throw their life away like this
I can’t believe you even have to ask.
This isn’t a red flag, the whole damn ship has already sunk and all the passengers have drowned. Get as far away from him as you can. You can NEVER trust him ever.
You already know the answer to your question love. Please ask yourself genuinely and truly why you love this man and what he offers you as a human and in your relationship. I don’t wanna judge you because ofc Idk your full situation, but infidelity and ESPECIALLY physical abuse is never acceptable. Please find the courage and strength to do better for yourself. I’m hoping the best for you in this situation
You're saying that he Hit a woman? Us Oklahoma boys that were raised right don't believe in that shit. Where does this mother fucker live?
He deserves a good ol' fashioned ass whoopin'
He will not fill the need you are trying to fill in yourself.
Only therapy, surrounding yourself with safe and trustworthy people and some “you time” are going to help here.
I have been in this situation. IT DOES NOT GET BETTER. He is not an honest person. He knows he did wrong and is love bombing you. It’s a manipulation tactic. He will do horrible things again when he’s feeling comfortable. He will say all the things you want to hear. He will isolate you and break you down. Get away from this guy - you *cannot* and *will not* save him if he’s truly not willing to do it himself. You are worth SO much more than this horrible treatment!!
not stupid, but you do need to work on your self respect. You caught him this time... Has there been other times? Is he wearing protection? Why are you considering staying with a partner that is looking for paid sex?
I would suggest to consider if he is the kind of partner you want in your life. Good luck and stay safe.
yeah you really are. lol what exactly is even desirable in a man like this? based off the way he texts it seems like his IQ is 20. completely unattractive, and i don’t think he’s the man you initially fell for.
He is trying to love bomb you and manipulate you. I have been there, stayed and suffered, I left. Learning to love myself again now and be the best mum I can be. He is a piece of shit! Love yourself OP and have some respect for yourself. Would you tell a friend this was ok and to stay? LEAVE GIRL, RUN FAR FAR AWAY!
You’re answering your own question by posting here.
A lot of them do, some are so oblivious 🥲
OP, hold up...how are you 26 but in one post 2 years ago you said you were 20 and in another post from 2 years ago you say you're 23, and then 24, all within 2 years?
Her whole profile is fake lolol everything is deleted
Lordddd and here I was trying to type up these encouraging comments like a fool 🤦♀️I'm gonna need some answers because shits not adding up OP.
The f*cking lack of common logic is astounding bro 😭😂 how do they get dressed in the morning if they can’t see through something this obvious? I’m not about victim blaming, but I’m also cautious about who I consider a victim. This person is only going to be a victim of their own decisions in the end and that’s usually a more painful reality than the abuse itself.
A lot of interactions could be avoided if women had respect for themselves. If they don’t respect themselves, why would anybody else?
Wtf is the text about “Freddie got fingered on Hulu “?? 😂😂
I love that casual Freddy Got Fingered drop at the end. 😂
Proud
that movie won awards for Worst Screenplay, Worst Actor (x2), Worst Director (x2), Worst Picture (x2), Worst On-screen Couple (x2) and Most Painfully Unfunny Comedy. it got a 10% on Rotten Tomatoes and 13/100 on Metacritic in other words, this guy pulled some shitty things and tried to mend his relationship by offering her a shitty movie
Nah he was threatening more self harm. Look what I’m doing, I hate myself, I’m watching Freddy Got Fingered!
😂
Those awards and reviews are bs. It deserves so much better. That whole movie exists simply because MTV wanted Tom Green to make a movie and he didn’t want to. So he compromised and made them a movie so bad they’d regret forcing him to make it.
I never knew that and now I appreciate that film so much more
That actually makes so much sense. Tom Green went through a lot of shit for MTV.
That‘s not true. Everything he did was in this vein of comedy there is nothing about that movie that was unexpected from Tom Green.
I don't have any horses in this race, but can't both be true?
It’s always possible that they forced him to make a movie at a time when he was trying to get more prominent in cinema and he made something to “punish” them for their forced labour and it so happened to match up with the humour of his contemporary MTV show. It reads more like a lazily repeated factoid though
Freddy Got Fingered is brilliant. Tom Green is a true artist
Idgaf that movie is a treasure Op still needs to dump him
Daddy, would you like some sausage?
Looks like it's shared by an app. Probably his lazy way of asking her to watch a movie with him. You basically just press the "share" button and select who to share to, and the app writes the text and link.
Get yourself to the point where you have enough self respect that you won't ever need to ask yourself this question.
Get yourself to the point where you ~~have enough self respect that you won't ever need to ask yourself this question.~~ can enjoy watching Freddy Got Fingered in the company of yourself.
Daddy would you like some sausage?
Daddy would you like some SAU-SA-GES?
Daddy I’m making cheese at the cheese sandwiches
The only correct answer
I appreciate that, that’s something I’m definitely trying to work on…
Hopefully, you figure it out before he gives you something you can't get rid of... Seriously. "Texted" prostitutes? I'd have a hard time believing that's as far as it went, and with him being broke, I'd be pissed at spending money on sex workers for messages or sex. That's a huge risk if there is anything in person... Some sex workers take all precautions to stay safe, but that doesn't guarantee he wouldn't bring something home to you to live with forever. It also feels manipulative to have him making it about him hating himself instead of what he did.
Oh, absolutely. The self harm, and self deprecation is 1000% just manipulation tactics.
Please read my comments. Why are you wasting time self-deprecating and writing responses rather than doing the only thing you should do? Block him. He just knows you’ll be back eventually and it’s written all over the wall by reading those texts. You gotta leave for YOU at this point. The minute you gotta wonder whether he’s hurt because you blocked him, or whether you think he’s changed now, you’re just throwing your life away yet again. At least being single doesn’t have the risk of ruining all future relationships for the rest of your life by doing this irreversible damage to your cognition. It’s so much more than time you’re wasting, and you’re never gonna see what you deserve by continuing down this path. It’s really sad that some girls just think they deserve this
*****no shame to anyone in the industry, you do what you have to do to survive**** if he’s as broke as he’s coming off, it’s possible that if (key word)any in person happen it was with someone on the lower end of rates. People in extremely desperate situations (aka those who would be charging the really low rates) are way more likely to be willing to do much riskier things like unprotected sex etc if the money is right. There’s really no way for OP to be 100% sure that she isn’t being exposed to anything. Can’t prove or disprove for a fact whether or not he did or didn’t do anything physical. And the texting alone is enough indication that it is at the very least a possibility. Your health will always matter more than a relationship.
Hello? Please leave. Just do it. For your own sake. Please?
Using her boyfriends strategy against him. I like it.
Yh you should never take him back if you do it's saying it's OK for him to treat you like shit and physical fights massive red flag all it takes is him to be in a mood and keep his hand round your neck a second to long or hit u u fall and hit your head.. u are worth more than that.. be by yourself build urself up and when u love yourself that much find someone worthy of ur time and love who doesn't cheat on u or abuse you.
Are you both 14 years old? Because you both sound immature?
I would leave because of my health anxiety. Once I know you’re actively trying to sleep with other people, especially prostitutes, I’m gone cause ain’t no way I’m about to end up with a life long disease over a dumbass boy.
Man…soo many people on Reddit hate themselves. It’s sad.
That’s mostly because they are terminally online… social media as a whole only shows you negative stuff for the most part because that gets clicks. That’s terrible for your mental health.
Yeah for sure. In 2021 I went through a horrible break up. I spent way too much time online. My New Year’s resolution was to stop using social media and travel. In February I deleted all my apps. Within 2 weeks I went from barely leaving the bed to a totally different person. Now I’m engaged and in live in a new country with tons of friends and new experiences.
I had the issue in the past where I essentially lived online. I worked online, played online, spoke to most of my friends strictly online. I was online for 16-20 hours a day. My mental health tanked until I ultimately had to just walk away. I quit my job and started working somewhere that forced me to interact with people. I started doing outdoor hobbies. I started convincing local friends to do small weekend trips and fishing days. It got us all outside more and disconnected. Totally different person as a result. I ended up going from no direction and depressed not knowing where my life would be in 5 years to being in a healthy relationship, having much closer friends, owning a business, and having two college degrees. Sometimes you really just have to disconnect.
I don’t have to look at the texts. You saying you fought physically is enough for me to say you need to leave each other alone. And maybe call the cops.
First slide I already thought that yes you, were stupid. But then the "I'll drop weed off to your mom" followed by "cigarettes?" Then to "watch Freddy got fingered" Weirdest complication of texts by a deranged bozo ever. OP please have some self love.
Girl… if this shit was a class you would have an F- and be asked to stay a grade behind. Yes you are stupid. No offence but you asked 😭
Thanks for the honesty girl 😩
Ofc, you’re too good for that shit like… pls pls have love and respect for yourself before you share it with another person! I’m sure you know its wrong too because you’re asking Reddit! And pls pls pls don’t sleep with him without an STD test at the very minimum!! You don’t know where he was or who he was with! 😭💕💕
Physically fighting a women is more get expelled territory, not just held back imo. That’s a line every decent man or boy knows you just never cross for any reason.
Physical fighting in my past relationship was me blocking her until she hurt herself or got tired and stopped hitting me. I’ve never hit a woman but I’ve had plenty hit me and throw stuff at me and this whole idea that men shouldn’t defend themselves is rather stupid. My ex came at me with a kitchen knife once because I was trying to leave the house and get away from her. We argued, she told me to leave, I grabbed my bag, and she changed her mind. Domestic violence isn’t exclusive to women.
Tbh I agree, no decent person should ever hit or intentionally hurt their partner :( If someone ever does that to a person or if a person ever does that to someone else, there is no love in that relationship. No matter how much they apologize or say they didn’t mean it.
This is trashy af. Why would you stay with someone like him?
Toxicity can resemble addiction. We don’t always know how to leave, even if it seems simple to the outside world. Try not to judge and offer helpful advice. Would you speak to a human in pain like this in person? Likely not. Be kind. Do better please.
You reap what you sow
Check out Freddy got Fingered on Hulu!
Didn’t even need to read the screenshots to say “yes”. Hopefully you’re just looking for people to help you get the strength to leave. So. Consider this one of those replies.
Thank you
Yes. Run, don't walk, away from this trashy dumpster full of red flags... 🚩🚩🚩🚩
Last slide is masterpiece
Yes you are. Wake tf up. This man has issues, you CANT fix. You’ll never be able to fix them for him. He’s an adult, as are you. Leave this man nowwwwww.
Adding onto that, yeah unlikely these issues could ever get fixed. If he put in a concerted effort into self work then there’s a *chance* he’d improve. But there *isn’t* a chance it’s going to happen with you there. Staying with him is enabling the behavior. He has deep-routed issues and he isn’t going to legitimately consider working through them unless he hits rock bottom first; the kind of bottom where he spends some time feeling desperate and alone. That’s when people make these kinds of changes—IF they’re going to at all.
💯!
🚩🚩🚩 This man is a walking red flag. Prostitutes, physical abuse, emotional manipulation.
And threats of self harm. A real gem.
And shitty movie recs to top it all off
...and that was him on his best behaviour, trying to win his gf back. Your bar is in hell OP, seriously your life will be actual fucking hell if you stay with this loser. Dig up a little self respect and leave.
Babes, with love, if for no other reason, this could be very very bad for your physical health. He could give you diseases, some incurable. Please run, don’t walk.
wtf? yes ofc u are
I didn't bother reading the rest of the text messages. Why would you stay with someone who cheats or puts his hands on you?
Seriously? You seriously have to ask this question. He cheated on you. He spent his money on sex. He could catch and STI and give it to you. He does NOT love you. He will still have sex with prostates. He will never stop. You staying with him is the stupidest choice you could make. And PHYSICALLY he was violent? Girl. Come on. Wake up. Have some self respect and block him. Don’t be a coward.
You’re stupid for staying.
This isn’t the way to a better life.
I’m not reading the texts. Yes, you are stupid if you stay.
literally like dont pmo please
Oh man, the fight, the prosties and threats of self harm. That's a manipulator right there. You gotta ditch and make sure he can't contact you afterward. He'll pull the love you's, I'm getting better and self harm thing again and you'll be back there.. just go, please.
You might be trauma bonded and that makes it hard to leave. You might want to read why does he do that by lundy bancroft. Wishing you peace.
Thank you
I wouldn't call you stupid, but I will say that you don't love yourself if you stay with him. He does not love you. His actions said that loud and clear, and now he's trying to manipulate you with guilt by threatening to hurt himself. Love yourself, Op. Leave him and fall in love with you again.
You’re not stupid, you need to heal your attachment / trauma wounds and work on loving yourself before dating again. Seek professional help. What happened will happen again and again and if you stay he’ll make sure to hide it.
Until he hits her or cheats on her again. He doesn't love himself, so he surely doesn't and can't truly love her. They're reflections of one another. Can't be with someone that low if you're not that low yourself... yanno? Great advice, though. I agree wholeheartedly.
Wow what you said really hit for me… that were just reflections of each other
Just spend some time with yourself. Loving yourself. Be your own parent... think of how a loving parent should take care of their child and take care of yourself that way. Do fun things, join groups that you enjoy, try to improve your health, work on whatever you need to work on... then you'll attract better options. Also, like the previous commenter said: *therapy*... you should try to figure out what the root of the issue is to why you keep going back. This current guy is your lesson to look back on and be proud of yourself for overcoming whatever it is that he provides or has that keeps bringing you down to his level. He's like an anchor in the sea of life. Best wishes.
“do i need to pay to talk?” that’s what got him in this predicament to begin with
Bitch stand up. This is so pathetic.
You know the answer to this. Value yourself more than he did and leave him in the dust.
It’s already bad that he cheated on you, but to add physical fighting on top of that…just one of those two things is reason enough to leave. The amount of work required to repair this, even just figuring out how to begin to repair this…will take years. I think the smart thing to do is cut your losses and leave.
He won you over and threw you away for a prostitute and you're asking if you're stupid for staying? Are you waiting for him to bring home an incurable STD to you?
“I’ll smoke you out”
Girl let him kill himself and yes you ARE stupid if you stay with him fr girl the bar is in hell and he’s rotting in the pits of the 7th circle 🙄 do better this man does not love you put yourself first fuck, the love you want comes from within
Yes.
Run far far away from him - he does not love you and i know from experience how much worse this gets.
Girl…
“I love you and I feel really bad” “Check out Freddy got Fingered on Hulu!” That’s already a red flag man just do the right thing bud
Manipulation. He told you he's going to hurt himself to get you to forgive him and get back with him. It's manipulation. Texting prostitutes, verbal and physical abuse and now emotional manipulation. It's up to you if you stay with him but don't expect any support system to keep helping after you make that choice.
So your boyfriend texts prostitutes, probably has cheated, you guys have physically fought and he manipulates you by saying he’s going to hurt himself. God knows what else. It will only get worse, it will never get better. Leave now so you don’t find yourself in this same situation 5 years from now. You’re wasting your time and life being in this relationship.
She said in a comment he also tells her all the time she's pathetic. Just a cycle of mental and physical abuse with some love bombing sprinkled in. Judging by the texts he sucks at the love bombing too
What the hell is with the last text lol
You love this for some reason.
“I’ll be awesome at anything just to talk to you” lmao this entire text chain is soooo pathetic This guy has no respect for you but what’s even more concerning is you have no respect for yourself. Please reconsider
im sorry but the hulu link at the end absolutely fucking took me out LMAO
Not stupid but you need to do what's best for you, and his disrespectful behavior in the relationship can not be ignored. He will continue to do it and find sneakier ways to hide what he is doing. Also, start getting tested for stds/hiv. You have no idea what he has truly been doing and need to make sure you're still healthy
Just remember- nobody congratulates you for staying with a problematic person, and it only harms you and enables their bad behavior. Won’t tell you what to do, but I just personally wouldn’t.
He is threatening to hurt himself. That is such a red flag.
Yes
All the people giving you tough love in the comments :,) you’re not stupid you’re just in an emotionally abusive relationship. Of course it’s not always like this and you probably hang on to little moments that tell you he cares, but I am here to tell you that this little boy does not give a fuck about you. He’s trying to make you feel bad for him when he was the one that fucked up. And I lowkey think he’s testing how much he can push your boundaries and see what he can get away with in this relationship without you leaving.
Yeah you are. Like yourself a little more and leave this loser in the dust.
I read the texts, but they weren’t necessary. It would be a dumb move to stay. I am not trying to call *you* dumb, but the action of staying after he cheated/texted PROSTITUTES, physically fought you, and then is now manipulating you would be… not great. Get out immediately. Block him, don’t look back.
He is threatening to hurt himself because he is ugly and hates himself to win you back? Can you see how he deflects from his total shit behavior and instead of saying ‘I’ll do better to be a good man, I’m sorry’ he makes it about you needing to rescue him because he is a shit person? This is cyclical behavior. He will never accept responsibility. He will always make it your job to fix. Be done with him.
Freddy Got Fingered. All of this leading up to that?! Stay the fuck away from him please.
Smokes ❌ Hoes Around ❌ Talks about hurting himself to gain sympathy and you fell for it ❌ Nah I think you’re doing great!
Freddy got fingered is on Hulu? Hell yeah
yes you are stupid for staying. you clearly don’t love and respect yourself
You are not stupid, you are in love with a toxic person. When you say you got in to a physical fight, what does that mean? In my world a fight is mutual physical violence between “equals”, if he was physically violent towards you, that’s abuse. To get to a point where you will be ready to leave him, you’ll need to call a spade a spade. Threatening self harm is in page of of an abusers book. If he’s threatening to hurt himself, tell him that you will call the police to do a welfare check on him, but don’t engage further.
This person betrayed you, correct? And now he's emotionally manipulating you by threatening to hurt himself? I think you already know what we'll say. But here are my sincere questions: Why do you feel compelled to stay with this person? Are you looking for us to support you, or talk you out of it? And finally, if your best friend was in your position & told you this story about her boyfriend, what advice would you give her?
Check out Freddy got Fingered make me laugh out loud
What in the Jerry Springer episode 321 did I just read? Sorry. He got caught. His way of making amends is to either give your mom weed or hurt himself? If that isn’t redemption or affection I don’t know what is.
this man is trying (poorly) to love bomb you. He is gross 🤮
The real question here is did you ever check out "Freddy got Fingered"?
This whole time I’ve been giving my wife love and stability. Turns out I should have smoke out her, give her cigarettes and give her mom weed. AND I could be beating her and texting prostitutes (famously the best part about going to sex workers) while watching Freddy Got Fingered? Is she an idiot for staying?
The headline is wrong. I should be: "**EX**-Boyfriend Texted Prostitutes" and then proceed to tell us how you dumped his butt.
That you are asking this question alone is a huge sign that you need to leave this entire situation behind. Your self respect is so low and you do deserve more
Dudes trying to manipulate you.
Yes
Omg leave!!!! Run away as fast as you can. Staying will only bring pain.
You said in another reply that, “it’s not always like this.” You need to realize it should NEVER be like this. This situation happening at all is a major red flag. You would be stupid to stay, yes. Leave him and don’t look back.
1) prostitutes 2) physical fight Enough said. You stay, you stupid.
You’re not stupid. But threatening self harm to make someone stay is straight out of the abuser textbook. He is not sorry. He is sorry he got caught and is experiencing consequences. You deserve better.
If you have to ask then I think you already know the answer
This is seriously messed up. Point blank, you’d be stupid if you stay. This boy texted prostitutes, y’all got in a physical fight, and not to mention the things he said he’d do to “win you back,” are not things a man would say. Anyone who threatens or makes a comment about hurting themselves to get back with a partner is manipulating the hell out of you. The next time he says that to you, tell him you’re calling the cops over self/harm claims that you can back up with texts and watch him panic. If he says it again, tell him you will call the cops. He’s manipulating you to get you to come back instead of just accepting what he did and respecting whatever your decision is. You gotta get rid of this guy. I’m telling you he’s no good and he will do crap like this over and over. Do not let someone treat you like this and take them back. You have to set the standard for how you’ll be treated and how you won’t. You have to stand up for yourself because you’re the only one who can! What is it going to take for you to realize he’s not treating you the way you deserve to be treated, love? Doing all that is not love. You may love him, but love isn’t enough, especially when the other person treats you like shit! Girly, this is just going to be a vicious cycle until you say enough is enough.
I'm not going to say that you're stupid, but I will ask you why you are staying with someone who is making you question if you are stupid? Our hearts make us make stupid decisions. Don't listen to your heart in this situation listen to your head and gut...... you already know what you need to do.
Just block this loser on everything and don’t talk to them again. Find a guy who’s not into paying hookers for sex potentially giving you an std.
“We got into a fight physically” You are absolutely stupid for staying.
Cigarettes
Is he on drugs?
You shouldn’t be there. It’s not a good thing for you or any attempt at recovery you’re making/potentially going to make. In fact, until you are able to be alone and feel like a productive member of society (however you do that, there are many ways) and see that you can depend on yourself for the things you need, you will probably struggle with realizing you’re worth more than this. Good luck with everything, from someone who’s been in a similar spot and has gotten out. You might not believe you have it in you, but you do. We all do. It’s whether or not we make the most difficult decisions to get there. I know the cards are stacked differently for different people, but it’s possible. Btw, anyone, and I mean anyone in your life who is telling you they’re gonna hurt themselves in order to elicit a response, like you have any control over that, is manipulative and abusive, whether they mean to be or not.
Yes, leave. This is a trauma bond. Staying will only make it even harder to extricate yourself later. I saw you mention elsewhere in these comments “It’s not always like this,” but in ANY healthy relationship the only answer you should ever be able to give is “It’s never like this.” Idc if t never were to happen again, once is too much. And if you are wrong and it happens again, there’s no saying it won’t be even worse what happens then. Please don’t find out what that looks like. I know the first step is hard but it is necessary. The steps after will get easier and easier. Let yourself find them. Nobody worth having does what you’ve been through.
Unfortunately, yes. Leave him girl.
This is a toxic relationship. Trust has been broken. Fight that has escalated to being physical. That is not ok. You should leave. Take a lot of time to yourself, think about what boundaries you want in a relationship, and enjoy getting to know yourself before dating again. I wish you the best ❤️
This boy cheats on you with prostitutes, then asks if he can make it up to you with weed. Are you fucking serious? The bar is 6 feet underground. Stop saying things like "it's not always this bad"/"it's not always like this". You are enabling his behavior with that kind of language. If you were in a healthy relationship, you wouldn't have made this post in the first place. Sorry to be blunt but yes, you would be very stupid if you stayed. He isn't going to stop, and if he knows you will let this slide, he will be even shittier to you because you're not showing him that his poor choices have consequences. Please dump this fucking idiot and learn to respect yourself. You deserve someone worlds better than this trash. Edit: sorry, but gonna be blunt again. Get tested. I highly doubt texting is as far as it went.
I'm going to tell you a personal story about me and maybe it'll give you some perspective. Growing up my next door neighbor was my best friend even though she was a couple of years older than me. We lost touch for several years until I messaged her on FB, and long story short now we're married. Before we got together I was addicted to opiates for years and continued to do them after we got serious. She took me to the beach several hours away to propose to me, that's how good it was. I ended up getting worse and worse. Arguing all the time. Guilt trips from me etc. At my worst I was taking 10 30mg oxy. Then one day I wake up to see she had done gone to the store and bought me a tent and an air mattress and told me to get out. That was the catalyst to me getting help, and repaired my relationship. 8 years later I'm still clean and still in therapy. Saying all of that, even at my worst I NEVER put my hands on her. I knew what I was doing was wrong, I never once said I'm going to hurt myself or put my hands on her, or even tried to cheat on her. And normally with addicts those are the go to. The difference was I actually cared about her. This guy doesn't give one shit about you. His apologies are even all about him, trying to buy his way out of it with drugs and cigarettes etc is not holding himself accountable. You need to get into therapy and learn what it is about you that makes you think any of this is ok. You deserve someone that can actually say I'm sorry, it was stupid. I feel like this, this and this and I'll do these steps to better myself This guy is incapable of any of that
Stand in front of a mirror and ask yourself that same question out loud. I hope you find your inner strength to do better for yourself.
He sounds like a real winner! (Yes that’s sarcasm) That you’re even coming to Reddit to ask that question I think you know the answer. Good luck!
Girl… I’m gonna hold your hand when I say this. He’s literally a loser, please move on and block him. I’m embarrassed reading the messages from him.
Yes. And he will absolutely do it again.
I mean this with love and respect but girl you’re being a fucking idiot. Like if you had a daughter or a close friend/loved one and the same situation, wouldn’t you be horrified and want better for them? You need to have that same standard for yourself. Internet strangers can’t want better for you than you do for yourself, ya know? Like i understand struggling with self worth and everything but holy shit there has to be some sort of limit, just a basic sense of self worth to where we aren’t staying with a giant man child who doesn’t treat you with a drop of respect. Why spend more time with someone who doesn’t value you?
Yeah he’s gaslighting you and manipulating you. He fucked yup and did wrong, but he’s trying to be the hurt one here by saying he’s going to hurt himself. And this is purely my opinion and based on my take of these messages. He’s not sorry. He’s upset he got caught. I fear he will do it again. You need to leave him and go watch that movie by yourself.
I'd have noped it out of there and blocked him permanently the instant he sent you a self-harm message. Absolutely not. That's peak manipulation.
Leave. Don't look back. Leave
Dude. He cheated on you, y'all got into a physical fight, and he's obviously a fucking bum just based on these texts. Who gives a shit about this loser? Why is this even a question?
Yeah, don’t ever stay with someone who is so embarrassing you wouldn’t want to tell your family what they did. It’s not dignified.
If he did it once he will do it again. Especially since he now knows he can get away with it. Good luck. I could never.
He physically assaulted you or you assaulted him, and now he’s trying to win you back with cigarettes and weed? You need to find your self value immediately. And you ain’t gonna find it talking to him. Stay away and give yourself a chance to discover your worth.
So he cheated or wanted to cheat but probably couldn't find anyone so he tried hiring sex workers. Doesn't matter if he says he loves you, those actions say he doesn't. If he loved you he'd only want you. And wouldn't fight you physically.. Are you ok? Did he hurt you?
If you have to ask a bunch of strangers on the internet if you’re stupid for staying in an abusive relationship I think you already know the answer to that.
🤮🤮🤮🤮
What can I do? I’m sorry. I hate myself. I’m going to hurt myself. I love you. Check out Freddie Got Fingered on Hulu.
You must really feel low of yourself. I’ve been there. It’s hard to leave and the honeymoon period after they fuck up and want you to not leave feels good because you’re love deprived. But it’s not real. Also you don’t love him. You love a made up version of him your mind has created for you. Take steps if possible to work out your own issues of why you stay. Try to do things for you. And even though leaving is hard it will be the right decision. If you stick to it and block him no matter what you will eventually thank your self hard in the future. If you stay this will be your entire life
Please don’t stay. You deserve better. He’s not only putting you at risk mentally but health wise.
girl he’s gonna give you HIV and then probably kill you too honestly. he’s extremely unhinged and it’s sad (pathetic) you don’t see the danger you’re in. good luck hopefully we don’t see you end up as another statistic.
You werent able to answer your own question when you were putting together this post? In the nicest way possible you need your own help for not realizing how easy of a decision this should be for you to move on.
My big girl attitude says there is no fixing this especially after you called him out on what he was doing & it became , **physical,** massive red flag. However, petty, immature me is looking at the way he's offering you things to try to "make up" for what he did & i'd drain him completely then leave. lol
you need to respect yourself more. why the hell would you consider staying? how could you read all this over again and not feel disgusted and disrespected? yeah, it’s dumb to stay. don’t.
Great movie taste though.
Get out of this now. You’re risking getting STDs.
Stand the fuck uppppppp Why even reply back with “You don’t love me”? Ofc he doesn’t. We can all see that.
So...did you check out the movie?
You just gave the W to the enemy team (toxic men) rematch and leave his ass
Ma'am. He was texting prostitutes and hit you when he got caught, and all it takes is "I'll smoke you out" to get you back???? Girl you know better. Do not do this. It WILL happen again. You don't need or deserve this. I promise you being on your own feels a lot better than being with a guy who cheats on you and hits you because he's mad that he got caught. This dude is a loser, I'm sorry. I know you think "but we love each other so much!," but this is not love, and when you find real love you will know that. You can buy your own weed. Get away from this dude. I don't care to hear his sob story about poor him because he hates the way he looks and he's gonna hurt himself etc etc. The manipulation is REAL. Fuck that. That's his problem, he's a man and he can figure that out for himself. He is not your responsibility. These are all just excuses and manipulation tactics to make you come back, and I guess it's working. In what way is this relationship serving you? Because you need to ask yourself why you're okay with any of this
I had an ex who I found out would download Snapchat literally 2 out of the 7 days a week we weren’t together and paid for nudes / sent nudes to random girls… and in the same breath would complain he can’t buy me Dunkin 😣 I had to break up with him like the trust is broken and I can’t ever look past something like that. I don’t think you should either tbh. We also got into a physical-ish kind of fight and it should never ever get to that point and I think it isn’t possible to come back from honestly. Edit: and when he had a new gf, he was still messaging me so I told her and she told me he was still cheating in a similar way when he was with her, so… no they don’t change!
He does love you. In his own pathetic, effed up way. But, love to him means you forgive him every time and do not hold him to a standard of behavior. His anger will be your fault. His depression will be your responsibility. Your love for him will always be on trial and need to be proven while his won’t need any actual outward expression. I mean, sure, you could take him back if this role is one you want to sign up for
You already know nothing good is on the horizon. Play bad games, win bad prizes. Edit: and looking at your post history, I can see you’re also trying to better yourself by getting sober and staying sober. The kinds of situations this man is going to get you into, are going to jeopardize all of that. Don’t give yourself this excuse (him) to self-sabotage down the line.
This is fucking crazy OP. Do you really hate yourself or something? Aside from even the prostitutes and physical fight, he’s obnoxious: he won’t discuss it at all (just keeps saying “I love you”) and threatens to “hurt himself.” He’s manipulative. With all due respect get your shit together
I feel sad for people like you. I've been forever single, but at least I don't have to deal with this kind of disrespect and disregard for my feelings. Idk why wouldn't you leave someone who texted sex workers and fought you. Do you think that's something someone who loves you would do?
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD RESPECT YOURSELF AND LEAVE THAT DUMB ASS MAN.
I don’t even need to see anything further after reading the post. It’s appalling that you can’t just type that question out to yourself and have an answer, and even more appalling that you have to take it to social media for clarity. I think all you commenters should save your fingers. It’s a dead horse. If this chick hasn’t been logical enough to escape by now then I’m afraid your words won’t do anything except make her ignore him for a few days before crawling back. I’m just curious, you DO know that the only person that is affected by your stupidity is you? You can scream from the rooftops how terrible this guy is, but you’re the one wasting YOUR life in the end. Nobody risks anything, not even him, compared to what you do. The fact that you’re trying to get others to agree with you instead of just doing what the best thing clearly would be (leaving and trying to regain some sense of normalcy if it isn’t too late for you to have a life now), makes me think you don’t understand that you’re the only one who loses here. You must thrive off the drama because I can’t think of another reason someone would throw their life away like this
I can’t believe you even have to ask. This isn’t a red flag, the whole damn ship has already sunk and all the passengers have drowned. Get as far away from him as you can. You can NEVER trust him ever.
You already know the answer to your question love. Please ask yourself genuinely and truly why you love this man and what he offers you as a human and in your relationship. I don’t wanna judge you because ofc Idk your full situation, but infidelity and ESPECIALLY physical abuse is never acceptable. Please find the courage and strength to do better for yourself. I’m hoping the best for you in this situation
You're saying that he Hit a woman? Us Oklahoma boys that were raised right don't believe in that shit. Where does this mother fucker live? He deserves a good ol' fashioned ass whoopin'
This literally is my abusive ex boyfriend to a T. Leave, it only gets worse. I decided to stay and it nearly cost me my life.
Y'all really need to learn to be alone. There's no way this is better than being by yourself.
I wanna see what he looked like after the fight
After being sent Freddy got Fingered I’d block and delete that shitstain on everything
He will not fill the need you are trying to fill in yourself. Only therapy, surrounding yourself with safe and trustworthy people and some “you time” are going to help here. I have been in this situation. IT DOES NOT GET BETTER. He is not an honest person. He knows he did wrong and is love bombing you. It’s a manipulation tactic. He will do horrible things again when he’s feeling comfortable. He will say all the things you want to hear. He will isolate you and break you down. Get away from this guy - you *cannot* and *will not* save him if he’s truly not willing to do it himself. You are worth SO much more than this horrible treatment!!
Yeah this guy sucks
He sounds really really stupid, and you also sound stupid for keeping him around.
not stupid, but you do need to work on your self respect. You caught him this time... Has there been other times? Is he wearing protection? Why are you considering staying with a partner that is looking for paid sex? I would suggest to consider if he is the kind of partner you want in your life. Good luck and stay safe.
Maybe you’ll leave him once he’s gives you an STD, if he hasn’t.
You need to leave. This is gaslighting and will only get worse
yeah you really are. lol what exactly is even desirable in a man like this? based off the way he texts it seems like his IQ is 20. completely unattractive, and i don’t think he’s the man you initially fell for.
He is trying to love bomb you and manipulate you. I have been there, stayed and suffered, I left. Learning to love myself again now and be the best mum I can be. He is a piece of shit! Love yourself OP and have some respect for yourself. Would you tell a friend this was ok and to stay? LEAVE GIRL, RUN FAR FAR AWAY!
This dude is so rediculously manipulative and childish. Please leave. This will only escalate.
Not even reading the texts. You said physical fight, and you need reassurance to stay?
GIRL STAND UP AND LEAVE THAT MAN.
Leave him
Ya’ll deserve each other.
“Boyfriend texted prostitutes”… hey, that’s very obviously not normal