Understand that she abused your generosity, and keeps you around for comfort just as you recognized. You don't deserve to be treated like that. You're hung up on the idea of what things *could* be like with her. Look at how things actually are, if someone cared about you that much, would they keep you on a string and act inconsistent like that?
No they would not. And it pains me to accept it after a year of me always giving her what she needed, even if it cost me my mental health. She always got the best treatment and when we fought, I put her first even when we was wrong. I think it’s time for me to move on and accept the fact that it was not meant to be. But it does hurt a lot
it definitely hurts, and it will sting for awhile, some days worse than others. But there is someone out there who will match and reciprocate the treatment you gave her. An equal relationship where there is an equal amount of giving and taking. no need to settle on someone who is literally not making you feel appreciated nor benefiting your mental health
She's keeping you in orbit in case she needs you as a fall back. All these breakups and needing space? She's dating some other guy that's on another level of attractiveness, after he pumps and dumps she comes back.
As soon as you leave she will pull someone else up from the roster to take your place.
You deserve better.
It’s funny that this happens right on the first of the year. It makes my New Year’s resolution so much more serious and driven. I will start focusing on myself more, reading more, working out more consistently etc.
Delete everything about her. Go out with friends. Do hobbies. It takes time to get over someone.
Don't reply if she reaches out with anything more than that you no longer want to talk with her.
Once you realise that r/askmen, your family, friends, boss, government or literally EVERYBODY only cares about you when it benefits them, the faster you canget back to living your life.
First, forgive her, ghost her, then forget her. Cut her number, get rid of anything that reminds you of her and completely break all contact with her close friends. If she lives close by, move away to another town/city/state of whatever.
It may take months or years, but it will be worth it.
Thank god she lives somewhere else and we don’t share any friend or whatnot.
It’ll be hard cause she has the bad habit of texting me and just being annoying and mean. But I’ll manage to keep it in check
No... You don't get it. Cut her off competely. If she can get an emotional reaction out of you she will drag you back in that cycle of doom. Don't "keep it in check".Cut her off man.
Final thing, test before you trust, and always verify they're still trustworthy to keep staying with them. This applies to both the men and women in your life.
So much better! I spent more time with family and friends, got a new job, and honestly I realised that at times, you just need to let go some ideas you had in order to make space for happiness
Understand that she abused your generosity, and keeps you around for comfort just as you recognized. You don't deserve to be treated like that. You're hung up on the idea of what things *could* be like with her. Look at how things actually are, if someone cared about you that much, would they keep you on a string and act inconsistent like that?
No they would not. And it pains me to accept it after a year of me always giving her what she needed, even if it cost me my mental health. She always got the best treatment and when we fought, I put her first even when we was wrong. I think it’s time for me to move on and accept the fact that it was not meant to be. But it does hurt a lot
it definitely hurts, and it will sting for awhile, some days worse than others. But there is someone out there who will match and reciprocate the treatment you gave her. An equal relationship where there is an equal amount of giving and taking. no need to settle on someone who is literally not making you feel appreciated nor benefiting your mental health
Amen to that, thanks for the kind words :)
She's keeping you in orbit in case she needs you as a fall back. All these breakups and needing space? She's dating some other guy that's on another level of attractiveness, after he pumps and dumps she comes back. As soon as you leave she will pull someone else up from the roster to take your place. You deserve better.
That might be the case, regardless I need to let go and focus on myself
100% Ask yourself how you can be a better version of yourself. Physically, socially, career wise, finances. Embrace chasing those things.
It’s funny that this happens right on the first of the year. It makes my New Year’s resolution so much more serious and driven. I will start focusing on myself more, reading more, working out more consistently etc.
Delete everything about her. Go out with friends. Do hobbies. It takes time to get over someone. Don't reply if she reaches out with anything more than that you no longer want to talk with her.
I started by deleting her number and I will also delete all the pictures and whatnot. I think it’ll be good for me.
She’s your ex for a reason, just move on.
It’s still hard to move on after investing so much hope in it
My ex? I'm pretty sure my wife doesn't truly care for me.
That makes me feel slightly better ahaha
Same boat here brother. It sucks marginally less knowing we're not alone.
We will make it, I started writing a journal about my days and it helps me getting it out of my system slowly
Once you realise that r/askmen, your family, friends, boss, government or literally EVERYBODY only cares about you when it benefits them, the faster you canget back to living your life. First, forgive her, ghost her, then forget her. Cut her number, get rid of anything that reminds you of her and completely break all contact with her close friends. If she lives close by, move away to another town/city/state of whatever. It may take months or years, but it will be worth it.
Thank god she lives somewhere else and we don’t share any friend or whatnot. It’ll be hard cause she has the bad habit of texting me and just being annoying and mean. But I’ll manage to keep it in check
No... You don't get it. Cut her off competely. If she can get an emotional reaction out of you she will drag you back in that cycle of doom. Don't "keep it in check".Cut her off man.
You’re right, I’ll just block her on everything and that will solve the issue at hand
Final thing, test before you trust, and always verify they're still trustworthy to keep staying with them. This applies to both the men and women in your life.
You can start by getting that pity dick out of your mouth
You can’t get over it
Op how are you doin now?
So much better! I spent more time with family and friends, got a new job, and honestly I realised that at times, you just need to let go some ideas you had in order to make space for happiness
Happy to hear it, did she ever message you again?
She did and we were both very civil about it. We talked about where we stand in life now and I genuinely felt happy about being alone and without her