I generally tend to agree with this. But my husband and I were married for 12 years and we had never gone anywhere. I told him if he did not take some vacation days I would start going without him and he was going to pay for it.
He started taking vacation and we started to leave town every few months and stay at a hotel.
This this this.
“Hey what’s wrong?”
“Nothing”
I can’t stand the nothing is wrong person. Sometimes you don’t feel like talking about it right now. But I need to know what’s going on in your head sometimes.
And maybe I’ll speak about things that are bothering me when I’m ready. I can’t stand people poking and prodding. I’m not hiding anything, I just don’t want to talk about my feelings every day.
The more I’m pushed the less I’ll want to talk about it
"i dont feel like talking right now about this but I reassure you I'll come to you when I feel more comfortable/feeling to talk" better than "nothing" :)
I’d rather this than nothing. I used to be someone who when I got mad, I’d just stop talking and retreat into myself. It wasn’t until a couple failed relationships did I realize it’s better to just communicate what you’re feeling. Even if it’s I don’t really feel like talking about it right now. But I’ll figure it out and we can talk later”. But the person who is closed off and you never know what they’re thinking, they don’t need to be with anyone but themselves.
Sometimes when I’m upset I have to stop and remember how to word things correctly. It’s just a shitty way to communicate because it’s not easy to frame things well when you’re upset . If someone keeps pushing me when I’m upset , I tend to react angrily and I can have a vicious tongue. If I say wait I’m trying to figure out how to say something, it’s best to wait until I’m not upset anymore.
Sometimes we need a break after experiencing something very bad. Also, some of us (myself included) believe that talking about some of our own problems will make our partner feel unsympathetic like “Oh boohoo, nobody gives a shit.” We’ll tell our partner soon enough, but you can’t expect us to be ready to talk about something bad.
Wanting to change my style and look.
First girlfriend wanted me to wear button up shirts, colored my hair brown, and even wanted me to wear brown coloured contact lenses.
Coincidentally these were all features of her cousin who she later married.
A good partner helps you grow and become the best version of you.
They don't try to mould you into their own vision.
Right? I mean, I kind of saw where this was going. I was thinking the ex-girlfriend wanted them to look like an ex, maybe a celebrity crush. But a *cousin*? No, definitely not that.
I dated someone who said "Some guys will find out I'm a Scorpio and immediately think they'll get their dick sucked."
I am not dating that person anymore.
Here's a thing. A good friend was mine is crazy dangerous with her pastimes. She rode one of the fastest production motorbikes, was a scuba instructor, goes skying on crazy slopes... I could go one. One year her husband convinced her to have a quiet beach holiday with a pile of books. On the last day she went down for one last sit in a hammock chair on the beach. She looked up at the wooden pole it was hanging from and thought, that, looks cracked. At that moment it broke in two and a shard pierced one eye. She lost it and consequently wore a patch for a long time till getting a glass eye. So I guess you're right about her but only in a very weird way. Sadly she now has MS so has given up all her dangerous pastimes. There's a moral to her story but I'm buggered if I know what it is!
I mean, yea but no, sometimes this is a good thing, for example if someone is on a downward spiral to become an alcoholic or something they would benefit from having someone helping them to change.
I don't think that's what they are getting at.
Changing someone and discouraging self destructive habits are different things.
I would think they are talking about...
If you have a hobby that you thoroughly enjoy like snowboarding. If your partner can't snowboard and doesn't want to try to learn, they try to change your interest into something else they like while eliminating your time to snowboard.
I told my boyfriend he has beautiful hair so he started growing it out, which I'm a fan of, but I never asked him to. No one can change you without your willing consent
When they unnecessarily label all of their exes as "crazy" or "bitches". Generally when someone thinks all of their exes are insane, it's a red flag. Of course there are always the people who really did have terrible luck and dated crazy person after crazy person, but more often than not it's a huge red flag.
This is good to know, I’ll definitely refrain bringing up my dating history to any future partners because I am one of the unlucky ones whose exes really did all turn out to be lunatics
Honestly, my last girlfriend was Chinese and she had this very large red flag in her room. In retrospect I should have seen it for what it was: a big red flag.
Turned our she was a CCP member, and if only I'd noticed the big red flag earlier, I wouldn't have wasted time.
I never understood _why_ I didn't see the red flag earlier. It took up an entire wall. How could I have missed it?
He is a US politician who was on the foreign intelligence committee who got played by some CCP spy snatch.
Is like. "I'm on the intelligence committee. Manipulating me or gaining access to my residence and devices is probably something a spy would want to do to me. Oh wow look it's this hot Chinese woman who is infatuated with me and out of my league. I'd better start sleeping with her and letting her hang out next to my files while I take a shower!"
I'd say fascism is a much bigger red flag. Most commies I've known are just working-class folks who want better lives for themselves and their coworkers. Mostly chill.
Fascists, on the other hand? Ewww. Every single one of em is bigoted in some way and casually violent. Bullies.
When you have a disagreement and they go to their Instagram and tell you how their 800 followers agree with them. So they are right.
Yeah, your Instagram followers in your echo chamber is the best way to win an argument.
Had an ex who would do this and I eventually dumped him.
I dated someone who used to do this, too. The biggest point of contention in our relationship was their kid who had major behavioral issues they refused to address. This kid was literally violent toward my kids and occasionally me, and I tried numerous times to get this person to address that behavior, and every time, they'd go drag me on social media and their followers would always agree that I was a monster and the kid was an angel. The problem was, none of them had ever met the kid. If I pointed that out, that just further convinced them I was a monster.
Obviously I dumped that person but they were really abusive, so that was a process, and thankfully long ago, but it stands out to this day as the most bizarre way I have seen to justify poor behavior. Poll a bunch of people who weren't there and have no idea what happened.
Your partner pressuring you for sex. Apparently from what I've heard it's normal. Not sure how sexual coercion potentially leading to rape can ever be normal.
I HATE those times when I’ve chatted with someone online enough to *think* I’ve vetted them well enough to meet irl, then, when I meet them at a restaurant or bar they are rude to the server. It’s so telling of a person’s character.
I haven’t been in a scenario wherein I have the opportunity to recognize a red flag yet on a date, but I do have something I used to always swipe left on when using dating apps. If they say they’re looking for someone over six feet. I’m six-foot-one, but, I don’t like it when people look for superficial qualities in men. Only 20% of men are actually over 6 feet.
Watch for trends. One factor unites all of your relationships: YOU. If you notice that the same things are occurring, look within yourself for warning signs.
Someone that just isn't happy. I don't mean all the time, no one is happy all the time, but a lot of people are unhappy ALL the time. They will never make you happy if they cannot find happiness for themselves. They may see you as their source of happiness, but only when you are at your very best, then as soon as you are not, then their unhappiness becomes your fault. That is no way to live.
1. Dishonesty. A person who lies about small things is a person who will really lie about the big things.
2. Narcissism. This covers a lot of sins. The making of everything about them, the inability to admit mistakes, and the lack of empathy for others.
3. Laziness. Let's be clear. You're not looking for a partner to labor in the fields. But the simple ability to contribute to the household's operation on a consistent basis is critical. It's not just about earning money. It's about keeping things running smoothly.
4. Addiction issues. Having had an in-law go through addiction know this: An addict lies every time he or she opens his or her mouth. You never, ever know if you can trust anything they do.
5. Ongoing drama with everybody. If, in the opening set of conversations with someone new, that person talks about ongoing arguments with bosses, co-workers, parents, siblings, exes, the bank, creditors, and everybody else on the planet, know that the common denominator in all those problems is him or her.
6. Self-control issues. Hair-trigger temper? Can't handle his or her liquor? Likes to spend his or her evening shopping? This will yield huge problems for any relationship.
They exclusively rely on you for their enjoyment and entertainment, without engaging in any hobbies or other activities than hanging out with you. That crap quickly drains your energy.
If their main concern in a relationship is money/gift giving. Relationships should be about 2 people who genuinely care about each other, not the person who spoils you the most with physical goods and money. If it’s like that then they don’t actually care about you, they just like how thick your wallet is.
When they won't listen to my advice and ignore me but will take the exact same advice from someone else, this is normally accompanied by them challenging everything you say in some weird attempt to one up you or find fault in you.
It just tells me you don't respect me or what I got to say. Avoid these people at all costs no respect means future heart break for you.
when they are vague. especially at the beginning when youre geting to know them.
was with my narcissist ex for 16 years with children. only person i ever met on her side was her mother and one friend of hers. in that timespan i was alienated from my closest friends and relatives and became an alcoholic. i didnt know someone had killed themselves because of her when she was younger until after my second child with her.
Manipulative behavior.
Instant GTFO moment the second someone starts that shit, I've been thru it one time before and I'd rather be alone the rest of my miserable fucking life than to ever be manipulated again.
Someone who has absolutely zero shame, self doubt, and draws negative attention to themselves constantly and being oblivious or uncaring toward the consequences.
Close second is not taking any personal responsibility.
I know someone like this who I like quite a bit, but deep down I know we could never work out because of these differences.
Jealousy/possessiveness.
You get into relationships in order to enhance your life, not restrict it. Anyone so insecure that they freak out if you are out without them, demand access to your phone, or otherwise restrict your life is not a partner. They are a warden.
when they get jealous over anything. my coworker recently told me she’s going through a breakup because her ex would try and get her to block any male people she knew, from friends to at one point her cousin lol
Hating any sort of minority. It always means they’re really not intellectually gifted or mature at all. Very undereducated and boring. Every. Single. Time.
If they don’t handle rejection well (or at all)
I get RSD (rejection sensitive dysphoria, comes with adhd) but when I cancel or postpone a date and they blow me up, that’s a massive sign of someone not doing the work needed to be stable in a relationship, or even just a massive sense of entitlement, which for me as a woman, can be insanely dangerous
A mismatch in financial discipline is something I've encountered a couple times in my dating life.
One was pretty bad with her money, but was perfectly content for both of us to live with crippling debt.
The other was utterly horrific with her money, and wanted someone to use *their* money to pay her way out of it.
Any conflict no-matter how small devolved into my ex crying and screaming about how I didn't love her.
It was so over the top I would lock myself in the basement just to get away from the situation. Where she would sit slumped against the door screaming to me for hours.
Long story short the red flag was basically everything. Spent two years living with this person trying to get her help.
they go onto your beanbag and start having very bad diarrhoea all over it then get off then start eating all of your god damn bananas you got just for you
Inability to recognize or admit when they've made a mistake.
Blames everyone except themselves
"All my ex's are crazy" energy
Works every time, half of the time.
No, it never works and it's your fault. /s
"I'm sorry that you feel that way"
If it always smells like poop. Check your own shoes.
That's an amazing saying.
Right - very relatedly, also never apologizing.
*"I'm sorry you feel that way"*
Narc behavior
This one is a catch 22 for me. If they could recognize mistakes, they wouldn't be dating me.
Using ultimatums to get their way instead of compromising.
Dealing in absolutes? Sounds like a sith
Or a Jedi talking about the Sith
I generally tend to agree with this. But my husband and I were married for 12 years and we had never gone anywhere. I told him if he did not take some vacation days I would start going without him and he was going to pay for it. He started taking vacation and we started to leave town every few months and stay at a hotel.
Whenever someone gives me an ultimatum in any context I deliberately do what I’m not supposed to
No respect for your interests or your time.
Takes but does not appreciate. If there’s a hole in their heart - money, intimacy, time - whatever - nothing will actually fill it.
good one.
There are two kinds of people in this world. Those who create energy and those who take it. Those who take it will never have their fill.
100%
Manipulation on any level.
Hey can you pass the sauce (ketchup) ?
[удалено]
Yes. Hell fucking yes!
My biggest red flag in a partner would be their inability to communicate effectively and be honest with me. Trust is key.
This this this. “Hey what’s wrong?” “Nothing” I can’t stand the nothing is wrong person. Sometimes you don’t feel like talking about it right now. But I need to know what’s going on in your head sometimes.
And maybe I’ll speak about things that are bothering me when I’m ready. I can’t stand people poking and prodding. I’m not hiding anything, I just don’t want to talk about my feelings every day. The more I’m pushed the less I’ll want to talk about it
"i dont feel like talking right now about this but I reassure you I'll come to you when I feel more comfortable/feeling to talk" better than "nothing" :)
I can dig that, I’m not really a “nothing” person.
I’d rather this than nothing. I used to be someone who when I got mad, I’d just stop talking and retreat into myself. It wasn’t until a couple failed relationships did I realize it’s better to just communicate what you’re feeling. Even if it’s I don’t really feel like talking about it right now. But I’ll figure it out and we can talk later”. But the person who is closed off and you never know what they’re thinking, they don’t need to be with anyone but themselves.
Sometimes when I’m upset I have to stop and remember how to word things correctly. It’s just a shitty way to communicate because it’s not easy to frame things well when you’re upset . If someone keeps pushing me when I’m upset , I tend to react angrily and I can have a vicious tongue. If I say wait I’m trying to figure out how to say something, it’s best to wait until I’m not upset anymore.
Sometimes we need a break after experiencing something very bad. Also, some of us (myself included) believe that talking about some of our own problems will make our partner feel unsympathetic like “Oh boohoo, nobody gives a shit.” We’ll tell our partner soon enough, but you can’t expect us to be ready to talk about something bad.
This is so big that I almost feel like it's no longer a red flag and just the reason that a relationship will end.
Wanting to change my style and look. First girlfriend wanted me to wear button up shirts, colored my hair brown, and even wanted me to wear brown coloured contact lenses. Coincidentally these were all features of her cousin who she later married. A good partner helps you grow and become the best version of you. They don't try to mould you into their own vision.
Damn that's all the way fucked up.
We all just gonna gloss over that cousin part? 🤔
Right? I mean, I kind of saw where this was going. I was thinking the ex-girlfriend wanted them to look like an ex, maybe a celebrity crush. But a *cousin*? No, definitely not that.
>Coincidentally these were all features of her cousin who she later married *banjo strumming escalates*
Hol' up
Woe, that got really Alabama really fast
Blames their shitty behaviour on their star sign... Yeah, I ain't buying the "it's because I'm a Scorpio" bullshit.
That’s a red flag in general. I just can’t with those stupid people
I dated someone who said "Some guys will find out I'm a Scorpio and immediately think they'll get their dick sucked." I am not dating that person anymore.
You at least get your dick sucked?
Quite a bit, yes.
As a Scorpio I would like to respond to this but I’m am too busy sucking dick
An eyepatch. It's a sign of dangerous living, possibly pirate or rustler but certainly an outlaw
That's a black flag though
Or head of S.H.I.E.L.D
Here's a thing. A good friend was mine is crazy dangerous with her pastimes. She rode one of the fastest production motorbikes, was a scuba instructor, goes skying on crazy slopes... I could go one. One year her husband convinced her to have a quiet beach holiday with a pile of books. On the last day she went down for one last sit in a hammock chair on the beach. She looked up at the wooden pole it was hanging from and thought, that, looks cracked. At that moment it broke in two and a shard pierced one eye. She lost it and consequently wore a patch for a long time till getting a glass eye. So I guess you're right about her but only in a very weird way. Sadly she now has MS so has given up all her dangerous pastimes. There's a moral to her story but I'm buggered if I know what it is!
Live life to fullest, because we can never predict how we will go
Could also be a Mad Dog
Victim complex
As far as I can tell those with a victim complex are usually the perpetrators
Can't control their anger and/or hits and breaks stuff when angry
[удалено]
Emotions R Hard
Someone who wants to change you
I mean, yea but no, sometimes this is a good thing, for example if someone is on a downward spiral to become an alcoholic or something they would benefit from having someone helping them to change.
I don't think that's what they are getting at. Changing someone and discouraging self destructive habits are different things. I would think they are talking about... If you have a hobby that you thoroughly enjoy like snowboarding. If your partner can't snowboard and doesn't want to try to learn, they try to change your interest into something else they like while eliminating your time to snowboard.
Even in that case, you can’t change an alcoholic’s behavior. The alcoholic has to want to change their behavior.
I didn't say someone trying to *help* you. I should have been more specific, granted.
I told my boyfriend he has beautiful hair so he started growing it out, which I'm a fan of, but I never asked him to. No one can change you without your willing consent
Your significant other restricting you from hanging out with your friends.
Friends AND family *cough* my ex *cough*
Manipulating, gaslighting, “winning”
When they unnecessarily label all of their exes as "crazy" or "bitches". Generally when someone thinks all of their exes are insane, it's a red flag. Of course there are always the people who really did have terrible luck and dated crazy person after crazy person, but more often than not it's a huge red flag.
Raised in crazy= seeks out crazy. I definitely contributed to the problem, not having boundaries doesn't help
This is good to know, I’ll definitely refrain bringing up my dating history to any future partners because I am one of the unlucky ones whose exes really did all turn out to be lunatics
You're the common denominator. Time to look at yourself.
If their political views are their whole personality.
Communism is a big red flag.
Honestly, my last girlfriend was Chinese and she had this very large red flag in her room. In retrospect I should have seen it for what it was: a big red flag. Turned our she was a CCP member, and if only I'd noticed the big red flag earlier, I wouldn't have wasted time. I never understood _why_ I didn't see the red flag earlier. It took up an entire wall. How could I have missed it?
Representative Swalwell, is that you??
I'm not American, I don't get the joke
He is a US politician who was on the foreign intelligence committee who got played by some CCP spy snatch. Is like. "I'm on the intelligence committee. Manipulating me or gaining access to my residence and devices is probably something a spy would want to do to me. Oh wow look it's this hot Chinese woman who is infatuated with me and out of my league. I'd better start sleeping with her and letting her hang out next to my files while I take a shower!"
Or... I could be him..... ? And you caught me?
I'd say fascism is a much bigger red flag. Most commies I've known are just working-class folks who want better lives for themselves and their coworkers. Mostly chill. Fascists, on the other hand? Ewww. Every single one of em is bigoted in some way and casually violent. Bullies.
I agree with you, but you're the comment you're responding to is a joke.
To be fair, fascism is often also a big red flag. But, y'know, with some black marks as well...
When you have a disagreement and they go to their Instagram and tell you how their 800 followers agree with them. So they are right. Yeah, your Instagram followers in your echo chamber is the best way to win an argument. Had an ex who would do this and I eventually dumped him.
Or they go to Facebook and share memes about what they think or feel instead of talking it out.
I dated someone who used to do this, too. The biggest point of contention in our relationship was their kid who had major behavioral issues they refused to address. This kid was literally violent toward my kids and occasionally me, and I tried numerous times to get this person to address that behavior, and every time, they'd go drag me on social media and their followers would always agree that I was a monster and the kid was an angel. The problem was, none of them had ever met the kid. If I pointed that out, that just further convinced them I was a monster. Obviously I dumped that person but they were really abusive, so that was a process, and thankfully long ago, but it stands out to this day as the most bizarre way I have seen to justify poor behavior. Poll a bunch of people who weren't there and have no idea what happened.
"Depression can be cured by being and thinking positively."
Just ViBrAtE on a higher frequency..
False. Just pray more. Plus stop being so selfish by thinking about your own needs ... like food.
Not showing gratitude, not being polite
Asking reddit about red flags every single day.
1/ Obsessed with her apperance. Always dreaming about having time and money for plastic surgery. 2/ Zero interest or respect to formal education.
I just had to end a relationship with a girl like this for point 1. It all roots down to insecurities.
Disloyalty
Your partner pressuring you for sex. Apparently from what I've heard it's normal. Not sure how sexual coercion potentially leading to rape can ever be normal.
Yes, this.
Jealousy and trust issues. You’ll spend all your energy on this stuff and sacrifice your own happiness trying to accommodate insecurities.
Lack of empathy
Just ended a relationship with this issue. It’s tough. They care for you but not enough for it to work long term
Cheater
Domestic violence
They have a partner already…
When ‘all’ their exes were crazy. Usually means they made them that way.
Hiding alcohol use
Prior allegations or charges for abuse or sexual assault. where there's smoke. Red flags all over the place here.
Control issues. I try to spot those early because they can morph into a lot of ugly things down the road.
dishonesty
Inconsistency. We’re too young to go back and forth playing mind games. It also severely triggers my abandonment issues.
Being unkind
They will probably talk trash about you if they talk trash about others.
Being rude to service workers and wait staff. I won't go out with you if I see you doing this
I HATE those times when I’ve chatted with someone online enough to *think* I’ve vetted them well enough to meet irl, then, when I meet them at a restaurant or bar they are rude to the server. It’s so telling of a person’s character.
Passive aggressiveness.
Dishing on their exes
When you have to repeat what your problems are in too many different ways and they still don’t get it
Not respecting boundaries
Claiming Tiananmen Square was an inside job
Self absorbtion. These people will eventually suck you dry emotionally,while its never good enough May they be miserable on their own
An inability to compromise.
The don’t like Lord of the Rings
Who the fuck doesn’t like LOTR?
When they tell you their entire life’s trauma on the first date.
If they have no long-standing friendships and become jealous of / threatened by yours.
Constantly invalidating me.
Keeps talking how she wants to fuck actors and anime characters when she knows it makes you uncomfortable
"It's not my fault I'm a Scorpio." No. Just no.
I haven’t been in a scenario wherein I have the opportunity to recognize a red flag yet on a date, but I do have something I used to always swipe left on when using dating apps. If they say they’re looking for someone over six feet. I’m six-foot-one, but, I don’t like it when people look for superficial qualities in men. Only 20% of men are actually over 6 feet.
They either only talk about themselves or talk shit about someone else.
Jealousy. Followed by: Selfishness Anger management issues
Not wanting to get help for their mental problems. This is why, alongside being emotionally abused, that I left my ex.
A partner who idealizes you. It is a very selfish love because your partner's love does not belong to you, but to his/hers own imagination.
Watch for trends. One factor unites all of your relationships: YOU. If you notice that the same things are occurring, look within yourself for warning signs.
Lack of reciprocation. I get some girls want to be chased, but I’m not interested in being the only one making effort.
Religion
Someone that just isn't happy. I don't mean all the time, no one is happy all the time, but a lot of people are unhappy ALL the time. They will never make you happy if they cannot find happiness for themselves. They may see you as their source of happiness, but only when you are at your very best, then as soon as you are not, then their unhappiness becomes your fault. That is no way to live.
A confederate flag
Trump bumper stickers and flags. Obsession with guns and camo attire. Lives in parents’ basement.
or the soviet flag, they're pretty red!
1. Dishonesty. A person who lies about small things is a person who will really lie about the big things. 2. Narcissism. This covers a lot of sins. The making of everything about them, the inability to admit mistakes, and the lack of empathy for others. 3. Laziness. Let's be clear. You're not looking for a partner to labor in the fields. But the simple ability to contribute to the household's operation on a consistent basis is critical. It's not just about earning money. It's about keeping things running smoothly. 4. Addiction issues. Having had an in-law go through addiction know this: An addict lies every time he or she opens his or her mouth. You never, ever know if you can trust anything they do. 5. Ongoing drama with everybody. If, in the opening set of conversations with someone new, that person talks about ongoing arguments with bosses, co-workers, parents, siblings, exes, the bank, creditors, and everybody else on the planet, know that the common denominator in all those problems is him or her. 6. Self-control issues. Hair-trigger temper? Can't handle his or her liquor? Likes to spend his or her evening shopping? This will yield huge problems for any relationship.
They exclusively rely on you for their enjoyment and entertainment, without engaging in any hobbies or other activities than hanging out with you. That crap quickly drains your energy.
obsessiveness, as someone that had stalkers its the fucking worst
If their main concern in a relationship is money/gift giving. Relationships should be about 2 people who genuinely care about each other, not the person who spoils you the most with physical goods and money. If it’s like that then they don’t actually care about you, they just like how thick your wallet is.
Stonewalling Treating their ex poorly. Avoidance behaviour. Dishonesty.
When they won't listen to my advice and ignore me but will take the exact same advice from someone else, this is normally accompanied by them challenging everything you say in some weird attempt to one up you or find fault in you. It just tells me you don't respect me or what I got to say. Avoid these people at all costs no respect means future heart break for you.
Inconsiderate and playing mind games
Dishonestly.
If she is immediately a terrible person towards waiters, restaurant staff, and taxi drivers. That is a red flag.
when they are vague. especially at the beginning when youre geting to know them. was with my narcissist ex for 16 years with children. only person i ever met on her side was her mother and one friend of hers. in that timespan i was alienated from my closest friends and relatives and became an alcoholic. i didnt know someone had killed themselves because of her when she was younger until after my second child with her.
Secrets and Lies.
Manipulative behavior. Instant GTFO moment the second someone starts that shit, I've been thru it one time before and I'd rather be alone the rest of my miserable fucking life than to ever be manipulated again.
Someone who has absolutely zero shame, self doubt, and draws negative attention to themselves constantly and being oblivious or uncaring toward the consequences. Close second is not taking any personal responsibility. I know someone like this who I like quite a bit, but deep down I know we could never work out because of these differences.
Abusive or dangerous behaviour or has a rape fetish or smthn. Like tells you to 'act like a little girl'.
When they talk about astrology and horoscope
When they’re officiating a NASCAR race and instructing the cars to stop.
Treating his parents badly, treating animals badly, constantly bashing his ex
[удалено]
Jealousy/possessiveness. You get into relationships in order to enhance your life, not restrict it. Anyone so insecure that they freak out if you are out without them, demand access to your phone, or otherwise restrict your life is not a partner. They are a warden.
Weaponized incompetence.
when they get jealous over anything. my coworker recently told me she’s going through a breakup because her ex would try and get her to block any male people she knew, from friends to at one point her cousin lol
rudeness to service staff is a telltale sign
giant literal Nazi flag covering their house?
If she treats food service people like shit dump her....
Hating any sort of minority. It always means they’re really not intellectually gifted or mature at all. Very undereducated and boring. Every. Single. Time.
Reposting the same question that is asked every day or two in hope that people will visit her onlyfans
If you post pictures with them on social media but they try to hide their face, also while never posting pictures with you.
Insufficient mouth hygiene
Andrew Tate fan
If they don’t handle rejection well (or at all) I get RSD (rejection sensitive dysphoria, comes with adhd) but when I cancel or postpone a date and they blow me up, that’s a massive sign of someone not doing the work needed to be stable in a relationship, or even just a massive sense of entitlement, which for me as a woman, can be insanely dangerous
Crippling debt
A mismatch in financial discipline is something I've encountered a couple times in my dating life. One was pretty bad with her money, but was perfectly content for both of us to live with crippling debt. The other was utterly horrific with her money, and wanted someone to use *their* money to pay her way out of it.
Any conflict no-matter how small devolved into my ex crying and screaming about how I didn't love her. It was so over the top I would lock myself in the basement just to get away from the situation. Where she would sit slumped against the door screaming to me for hours. Long story short the red flag was basically everything. Spent two years living with this person trying to get her help.
they go onto your beanbag and start having very bad diarrhoea all over it then get off then start eating all of your god damn bananas you got just for you
Homicide of an ex partner or war criminal would top my list.
Being extremely religious. I grew up in what was basically a Christian cult, so I literally have religious trauma.
Selfishness
“All my exes are crazy, you shouldn’t talk to them”
Ex girlfriend had a rape kink so yea that’ll do it.
Both his parents had mental issues.
Not respecting consent
Dated a chick from Norway, had to dump her, she had too big a red flag
They rape children or salute magpies, like, na man, I’m out.
Asking this question over and over again
Her favourite movie is... 🎵 Hu-man centipede, hu-man centepide 🎵
If they are crap at managing money or want children, sorry nope.
Lack of empathy
Not being in a relationship for a very long time.
Eating chicken fingers at a steak house
They don't like animals, at all
Quick to anger. If the smallest slight or problem creates an over the top type of blowup, it tells me that person isn't someone I need to be around.
Think social media presence is important
They actually like me Forever alone