Fine! You want it to be a chain of screaming, It's a chain of screaming. I came up with the circle idea halfway through, cause I thought it was a more elegant metaphor, But fine, ruin it! You guys always undermine me when I'm trying to make a point, and I'm sick of it! God, I'm surrounded by idiots! IDIOTS!
I mean, at one point I'm pretty sure I sold a woman. I didn't speak the language, but I shook a guy's hand, he gave me the keys to a Mercedes, and I left her there.
Seriously. Jesus started the whole wait three days thing. He waited three days to come back to life. It was perfect. If he only had waited one day, a lot of people wouldn't even have heard that he died. They'd be all, like: "Hey, Jesus, what up?" Jesus would probably be, like: "What up? I died yesterday." And then they'd be all: "Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude." And then Jesus would have to explain about how he was resurrected and how it was a miracle, and then the dude would be, like: "Uh, okay, dude. Whatever you say, bro."
Best quote?
Most memorable most definitely.
"I love her ,Nick.
I love everything about her, and I'm not a guy who says that lightly, I'm a guy who has faked love his entire life, I thought love was just something idiots thought they felt, but this woman has a hold on my heart that I could not break if I wanted to. And there have been times that I wanted to. It has been overwhelming and humbling, and even painful at times, but I could not stop loving her any more than I could stop breathing. I'm hopelessly, irretrievably in love with her. More than she knows."
Ted, you know who’s a million times hotter than the hottest girl I’ve ever slept with? Her okay-looking friend I haven’t seen naked. Why? Because new is always better.
Oh my god can you just..just..... Okay?!
Hahaha I say this all the time
I'll punch a baby I don't care
Because, if you were going to be some lame suburban dad, why couldn't you have been that for *me*.
One of the best moments in the entire show
Fine! You want it to be a chain of screaming, It's a chain of screaming. I came up with the circle idea halfway through, cause I thought it was a more elegant metaphor, But fine, ruin it! You guys always undermine me when I'm trying to make a point, and I'm sick of it! God, I'm surrounded by idiots! IDIOTS!
See, doesn't everyone feel better now?
*looks at Robin exercising* Oh hey dude, I'm Barney
Whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary, unless your friends are there to see it
Ah you beat me to it
Best ever man
Came to post this.
And one of my personal favorites " you can't just call things,Barney " " I call that I can call things"
"*Oh, Ted, that is so romantic.. I want to fill a pillowcase with dead batteries and beat you with it.*"
When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead. True story!
Ofcourse!! We should buy a bar!! *smacks Monopoly board*
Tonight is gonna be legen-wait for it, I hope you're not lactose intolerant cause the last part of that word is DAIRY!
And then he banged 100 chicks… and invented a salad. True story!
*"You are the love of my life. Everything I have, and everything I am is yours... Forever."*
Ring bear
Please sir, can I have some more… pants! And then him dying from laughter and falling of his chair
Ted: You see that girl over there Barney: Oh you just know she likes it dirty
When he says “God never meant for us to travel at such breakneck speeds” while driving it kills me every time.
I mean, at one point I'm pretty sure I sold a woman. I didn't speak the language, but I shook a guy's hand, he gave me the keys to a Mercedes, and I left her there.
Ted wh- You NEVER BREAK UP A CHICK FIGHT! You just- UGH! *punches hole in wall and leaves*
But seriously, boobs?
"Si! And that's not spanish. That's her cup-size" That entire sequence of Barney and Ted is lit lol
Seriously. Jesus started the whole wait three days thing. He waited three days to come back to life. It was perfect. If he only had waited one day, a lot of people wouldn't even have heard that he died. They'd be all, like: "Hey, Jesus, what up?" Jesus would probably be, like: "What up? I died yesterday." And then they'd be all: "Uh, you look pretty alive to me, dude." And then Jesus would have to explain about how he was resurrected and how it was a miracle, and then the dude would be, like: "Uh, okay, dude. Whatever you say, bro."
Internet high five
Awesome idea, Jesus invented the high five, true story
Jesus and his best bro Brodas
Imagine the heads of two Irish babies, let's call 'em \*brbrbrbrbrbr\* and \*brbrbrbrbrbr\*
Best quote? Most memorable most definitely. "I love her ,Nick. I love everything about her, and I'm not a guy who says that lightly, I'm a guy who has faked love his entire life, I thought love was just something idiots thought they felt, but this woman has a hold on my heart that I could not break if I wanted to. And there have been times that I wanted to. It has been overwhelming and humbling, and even painful at times, but I could not stop loving her any more than I could stop breathing. I'm hopelessly, irretrievably in love with her. More than she knows."
Thanks i like this one
Am I Dead? (After the Pencil falls from the ceiling of Maclarens and lands eraser side in his nose)
Oh my God, can you just be cool?! Once?! Please! Just once! Can you just once be cool?! Once?! Please! 😟
The fortress of Barnitude.
Wait for it….
Still waiting for it.
i think tonight is going to be de- wait for it- lightful, delightful!
Peace out ombré
“Hey Bro… thanks for making such a hottie”
It’s gonna go up in flames 🔥
Probably a deuce. Go on
Challenge accepted.
🎶i know what you’re thinking what’s barney been drinking that girl was smoking hot🎶
Jack Package
It’s pronounced Jacques
OH MY GOD CAN YOU JUST ONCE BE COOL? ONCE. PLEASE. JUST ONCE.
Please.
Ted, you know who’s a million times hotter than the hottest girl I’ve ever slept with? Her okay-looking friend I haven’t seen naked. Why? Because new is always better.
I’VE GOT YOU, I DON’T NEED TO WAIT FOR IT ANYMORE.
New is always Better
You dumped a pornstar?! FRIENDSHIP OVER!
Wait for it…
New is always better.
Suit up!
Can you get over the "no banging the nanny " policy?
I am surrounded by idiots, Idiots... IDIOTS
New is always better
"If you were going to be some lame, suburban dad, why couldn't you be that for me?!?!?!"
You dumped a pornstar? Friendship over. FRIENDSHIP OVER!