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on_a_plinth

Possibly the ugliest house I've seen. It's like some bizarre interpretation of a child's drawing of a house.


Lucy_Lastic

Just needs a crooked chimney with spiral smoke spewing out. And maybe a giant flower


Greatgrowler

A house of note for me is not the ugliest I’ve seen, but certainly well out of keeping with the neighbours. https://maps.app.goo.gl/GvS1zeGjYAE5uf1YA?g_st=i


nottonightbabe_

The fence on the house … why?


Known_Wear7301

I would imagine it's some kind of terrace seating


Rude-Cover-8727

Euw. Looks like a Lebanese brothel.


thedutchrep

Wow, that’s terrible.


paulglosuk

That looks somehow unfinished


Federal_Pen504

Even sadder is that it was so much nicer before renovation


hoopsandhefts

It's got a massive forehead


Worried-Mine-4404

Trolley house.


RearAdmiralBob

Fivehead


Turbulent-Laugh-

Nothing about this is right, it's ugly inside and out. It's almost a masterpiece.


Coca_lite

How on earth did that get permission?


buymorebestsellers

Yes reminded me of the kids Minecraft houses.


Sir_Henk

That whole neighborhood seems cursed https://maps.app.goo.gl/jokSB93aa5HNLea6A?g_st=ac


Elegant_Celery400

It is; my ex- had relatives there, and on the first occasion we went to stay one of them said "*Raoul Moat kicked off just down the road*". Just as an aside, when I looked at the Streetview 360° without first zooming out to identify which town it was, I thought "*Ah, that looks like where X and Y live"*, so I had a chuckle when I then saw it was Birtley.


Worried-Mine-4404

Like something I'd build playing Minecraft with my nephews.


winch25

Inspired by Ant Mcpartlin's forehead.


numptynoodles

Unlike Ant’s forehead, I don’t think this one is packed up to the rafters in £50 notes.


elementarydrw

But that's a fivehead at best!


Plus_Pangolin_8924

When the builder/ architect is also a majority shareholder in a brick company.


Appropriate-Falcon75

It's just someone who really didn't want solar panels, so found a way to get a purely north facing roof!


BabaJosefsen

Spongebob Squarehouse


bondibitch

But all the rooms in the listing have windows. What the hell is going on in that windowless top 50% of the house that were not allowed to see?


delurkrelurker

Squash court.


gadget_uk

Upstairs dungeon.


PigletAlert

That’s my question. I’m less bothered by the ugliness and more bothered by what on earth is in that windowless hell hole at the top. There’s no floor plan either.


Retrogamer2245

The answer to what is up there is.... nothing! Here's another one the same with a floor plan: [Weird house with floor plan](https://www.rightmove.co.uk/house-prices/details/england-122016767-20190523?s=6ba0aea27842db7c593573bef81266cbd9e4bb095a6ab187780140fcd16fd3d1#/)


PigletAlert

That’s really disappointing


Retrogamer2245

I imagine it could be converted into living space, but there might be planning issues. Such a pointless void!


Original-nonOriginal

It's all loft space


Robotniked

This reminds me of that guy who every time his girlfriend pissed him off went onto his Facebook photos and edited her forehead to be slightly bigger


TallBritNE

Looks like it should be 3 stories but that’s the roof (a monopitch). I took a screenshot here: https://ibb.co/bQ71Vyg At least it’s cheap!


mittfh

There's a few monopitches near me on corner plots, albeit the 'short' end faces the road and the 'tall' end faces their back gardens. These date from the late 1970s (hence the "Royals" roads to the East of these examples). As Google Earth app doesn't seem to be able to export links, you'll have to make do with the coordinates: 52°24'13"N 2°01'50"W | 52°24'12"N 2°01'53"W | 52°24'17"N 2°01'38"W


Saffidon

What was the thinking behind them? Just to be visually quirky?


jagsingh85

Someone had to come up with a new idea to justify their wage/ budget and surprisingly it stuck, perhaps because everyone else approving it also needed to justify their wages/ budget too.


Retrogamer2245

I think it was a common design choice, especially in the 70's/80's but I don't think I've ever seen one this tall!


buymorebestsellers

You could solar panel that roof and pay for the entire street.


Emperors-Peace

It's not cheap for the area though. It's cheap for the whole country. But for the north east, in that area. This is probably around average if not a bit high.


efaitch

It's also an ex council house... My mam's house (similar size, ex council, in Washington, not the same village) sold for £110 in 2021. Another house exactly the same way up for £20k more at the time. So it's not necessarily overpriced for Washington


a_hirst

£110k, right? I know the NE is cheap and all, but...


amyames8679

Who was the architect? George 🧒🏼 Aged - 7 & 3/4 Favourite colour - Yellow Favourite hobby - LEGO Of course… makes complete sense now.


Fyonella

Ooh are you implying George Clarke? 😂 He grew up in Washington and became an architect, after all! Two scenarios. He saw these houses and felt ‘there has to be a better way!’ Or, those were actually his designs aged 7 & three quarters and he had an uncle on the council!


phoebsmon

From now on I'm assuming Waskerley Rd was his Year 4 homework. I'll sleep better at night.


blackcurrantcat

My god that’s an ugly house. I don’t understand what’s up there. I thought maybe there was a window in the roof and there was another floor up there but there isn’t, it’s just a comically big half of an attic/roof that reminds me of those big hats Boy George wears.


Saffidon

I know, I really wanted to see a floor plan to work out what was going on, but they didn’t include one.


blackcurrantcat

Is there just a loft with some ludicrously high roof space? Why would any architect agree this without there being some benefit? It’s just a huge wall otherwise; the weight load on the bricks like 6/7/8 rows above the windows just pointlessly carrying the hwage forehead for no reason…. It’s like a 7 tier wedding cake.


Fred776

There's a similar one here with a floorplan but it doesn't give much of a clue what's going on in the roof space: https://www.rightmove.co.uk/house-prices/details/england-122016767-20190523?s=6ba0aea27842db7c593573bef81266cbd9e4bb095a6ab187780140fcd16fd3d1#/


WheatOne2

Moss Side in Manchester has a few rows a bit like that although less extreme. [https://maps.app.goo.gl/x5B4oBjVvASUKcEc8](https://maps.app.goo.gl/x5B4oBjVvASUKcEc8) ​ There seemed to be a period of designing council/housing association houses with stupid roof shapes for no obvious reason. These weird ones in Suffolk are a good example: [https://maps.app.goo.gl/bGtUaCDR9wEEakk48](https://maps.app.goo.gl/bGtUaCDR9wEEakk48)


buymorebestsellers

"We've put our name on the waiting list for a pyramid !"


Cheese_Potter_77

That is a really strange design idea. I at least expected to see some sort of elaborate 3 story entrance way or something, I wonder why they did that?


Coffin_Dodging

How very peculiar, I thought maybe it was an extension on two semis, but there are more in that area!! Appears to be quite light internally, though


jagsingh85

The pictures are likely photoshopped to make the rooms look bright. It was dull and raining when they took the photos of my last place but it looked sunny on rightmove.


BreadMemer

I got scammed by this when I needed to move during covid. Couldn't visit the property during lockdown so signed something based on the photo's they sent. They made it look like it got properly light in the day and properly dark at night. Neither of those things are even remotely true.


vurkolak80

I don't understand why you'd design a house with a double-height attic. It's literally two stories tall.


The_SaintXVI

Knew it was Washington before I even opened the app. The older houses are all like that for some reason. You can even buy a flat for like 2 grand


shesellsseashells99

I guessed it before I'd opened it, too. Only Washington has property like that!


AvadaBalaclava

Milton Keynes has a few


ProtoplanetaryNebula

A flat for £2K? I guess the area is phenomenally bad?


penguinsfrommars

Architect used Minecraft to design it i guess.


Ribbitor123

It's almost as if a window tax was still in operation. The estate agent's blurb says: 'first time buyers dream...' when it's more like: 'first time buyers nightmare'. How on earth did the developers get planning permission for this abomination? I see it's in Tyne & Wear so maybe the spirit of T. Dan Smith lives on and someone bribed someone in the Council.


Fit_Manufacturer4568

It's a new town. Planners and architects were allowed to be silly buggers. Doesn't matter they don't have to live in them. There's a small late seventies council estate near me, that looks the same.


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[удалено]


residentdunce

Scrolled way too far etc...


Fit_Manufacturer4568

That's new towns for you. And you all architects to do something different. Well that's what you end up with.


Schnurzelburz

How about that bathroom design (pic 7)? Also, those radiators were distributed by someone who was dropped on his head when he was little.


Beautiful-Bluebird46

The sink!!


BellybuttonWorld

The doors and windows seem to be a random scattering of building site leftovers as well. It's like a really badly trained AI's attempt at a house.


efaitch

This is just Washington (my home town). I knew as soon as I looked at the house! Washington used to buy a mining town and most of the old pit villages were pulled down. Lots of miners cottages in the NE of England... Anyway, Washington Development Corporation was responsible for the redevelopment of Washington in the 70s and the architecture reflects this. I used to live in a council house that has two storeys at the front and 3 storeys at the back. Similar in design to this house but we had bedroom windows in the space! George Clarke, the architect & TV host is from Washington and did a programme on the development if Washington New Town. We moved into our Washington new build in 1981 and my mam lived in her house until she died in 2021 (we moved to a smaller house, but same type of build). I've moved around a lot and can honestly say that these houses are spacious and have great in built storage! The development of Washington New Town was a great thing when it happened: transport links to the major towns and cities were good and Washington was a good commuter town. Not only that, but there are a lot of walking routes that were Incorporated that are great for cycling along these days. Unfortunately, the new town hasn't really stood up to the changes in modern day life, but that's more about socioeconomics rather than progressive architecture! Anyway, don't judge a book by its cover is what I'd say!


efaitch

Here's an article by George Clarke himself: https://90years.buildingcentre.co.uk/building/washington-new-town/


luker1771

Vincent Kompany


babbleonzoo

Fewer!


ExpertReporter4329

(Fewer*)


Ray_Bloody-Purchase

Which dickhead gave planning permission for this atrocity?


Hewn-U

Yikes. I’m supposing that must be a Frizl loft


Background-Active-50

It looks like a very surprised house, like it's been startled and it's hair is standing on end


HirsuteHacker

What an odd little street. There are a bunch of similar houses around it.


RuneClash007

Like something I'd build in the Sims


AdThat328

Why...why do I like this?


teIdrassil

Get your offer in whilst there’s still a chance!


Brighton2k

All in all it’s just another …


LANdShark31

It kind of reminds me of Ant McPartlin’s forehead


BrokenDogToy

It's hideous, but the houses opposite are normal, so if you want to live on this estate, you'd be best off buying this house and then you won't have to look at it.


tazcharts

This house has a massive 5 head


DorothyGherkins

Never seen a house with a spam before


ApprehensiveUnit40

Toblerone street weird AF


OJay23

I'll have a brick please Rachel. And another. And another. And another. And another...


Witty_Detail_2573

Just a few initial questions….Is this house four stories high? Are the bedrooms in total darkness? Who puts a flat roof on a house deliberately? Can we club together and demolish it!


Go1gotha

"What's that? Yes, that's right a void... nah, just completely windowless... cheers Dave, by tuesday? Nice!"


numptynoodles

Paint the forehead black to give it a Noel Gallagher style fringe. 👌


likewhatilikeilike

that ought to be 'fewer windows'. just saying.


Simon_Denton

Lots of these style houses in the London overspill estates in Peterborough as well, genuinely don’t get the design inside or out. At least with some post war developments you get why people would’ve thought a specific design was practical but with these houses I’m dumbstruck


Cheekybants

The “I shouldn’t have asked the barber to cut off my fringe” house


IndelibleIguana

Pretty common council estate design. There are very similar ones in London. Some in Bermondsey, near the Millwall ground covered in graffiti, and on the A40 Hackney area.


Connell95

This is quiet a common design on council estates from the 70s across the UK – somebody somewhere seems to have got it in their head that standard pitched roofs were wasteful, and instead it would be better to build a massive wall of bricks. This one is particularly extreme though – and the mess of tiny windows underneath really doesn’t help.


El_Rompido

That streetview… just utter bleakness.


Empty-Progress1230

This looks like the shit I'd build in minecraft when I was 12


TommyCo10

Is there a cinema up there?


Emperors-Peace

I recognised this architecture style immediately. Clicked the link and unsurprisingly is the same street near where I used to live many years ago. Bloody awful looking houses. What's crazy is they're not flat roofed. So if you look at the back of that building, it's all roof. So they're tiiiny inside too.


HansNiesenBumsedesi

*fewer


International-Cut436

Have you done a 180 on the Street View? The house behind it is even weirder.


iamdefinitelynotdave

Looks like a child built it in minecraft.


Gti_Bob81

If Any Mcpartlin was a house....


london_smog_latte

Fuck me three ways from Sunday - you can’t get a 1 bed flat where I live (not London) for that


TeamBRs

Fewer.


teIdrassil

Gifting yourself has got to be one of the saddest things you can do for karma


TeamBRs

I haven't gifted myself or anyone anything pal. Reddit stickers are for cucks.


mr_vestan_pance

Less windows, more doors methinks


charlotterbeee

Bit of a five-head there


Piltonbadger

It did have windows upstairs in the google street view.


ProperComposer7949

It's reminding me of ant from ant and Dec on bo selecta


binglybleep

I was going to joke that this house needs a fringe, but it actually would look a lot better if that top nonsense was covered up with like a lot of ivy or something, so maybe it’s not a joke


CommunicationAny6250

Inspired by Pink Floyd’s awful concept album. The Wall. Don’t bother seeing the awful film of the same name starring a certain Bob Gandalf


newtonbase

Tefal house


mattlodder

It looks like AI hallucinated a house


WaltVinegar

That house looks like Chris Akabusi.


MakingItAllUp81

Strange there's no floor plan either.


iVirtualZero

Bottom part is house, top part is trap house.


reversedROBOT

Perfect for a projector for a movie.


Puzzled-Pumpkin7019

There's a similar property in Reading. [https://maps.app.goo.gl/gypqEr3D6kYJNBRc7](https://maps.app.goo.gl/gypqEr3D6kYJNBRc7)


Extreme-Acid

Got to have somewhere to grow that weed. I like on an estate ten years old. There are houses where brickwork has been done for windows but they are bricked up. Looks like they have an eye missing


-qqqwwweeerrrtttyyy-

This is quite literally the weirdest house exterior I've seen. I can't picture the roof because my pea brain is interpreting this as a thin wall where water (as in rainwater) would struggle to drain/run off correctly. Looks like a billboard belongs on it.


pysgod-wibbly_wobbly

Why would a house need a forehead?


sad-mustache

I've seen a whole road of terraced houses like this with the ugliest yellow brick ever


theladynyra

There's several homes like that knocking around my town. Ours is a 1979s "new" town, so suspect there's a fair few of this style still around the country.


ruri17

First time I’ve seen Ant and Dec standing in reverse Ant left Dec right arrangement


True-Smile5027

What goes on upstairs stays upstairs


marmeeset

A link?


Comfortable_Use_8407

Brick layer: "Mr. Foreman, we have a crap load of extra bricks. What do you want me to do with them?" Foreman : "Just stack 'em up."


No_Cauliflower_5489

From the side it looks like a wedge of cheese. What's going on in that weird windowless attic? It looks perfectly normal inside except for those windows that look like doors.


Lower_Bullfrog4505

When Stevie Wonder builds your loft conversion


I_Get_No_Sleep__

Craft house when you first discover bricks


nick2k23

Ye that’s an eye sore if I ever saw one


Rude-Cover-8727

I don't think I'm shallow but equally I don't think I could be emotionally balanced in such an ugly house.


thefakespartacus

The person who lives there has a giant forehead.


OneSufficientFace

Looks like that kid at school who has that MASSIVE forehead


2205jade

There’s houses just like this in the town I live in, so fucking ugly 😭😭😭 the back is no better


beardymo

Why am I reminded of James Daly MP? (Google him if you're not sure what I mean)


DasFunktopus

If houses have foreheads, then this abomination has a fivehead.


StandardBanger

I didn’t even know houses could have 5-heads 🤣🤣🤣


Old-Ticket5983

That's a big forehead of a house.


MrTase

I was going to say that I saw that house for sale when I was looking two years ago but then I saw on the map that there are others of the same.


findinggreedo

You can't make a house that looks like Ant McPartlin. Builder: Hold my beer bro


VelvetSinclair

It’s the windows. You’re thinking: there’s no windows. And it’s not cosy. It’s claustrophobic. Caleb, there’s a reason the room has no windows. In many ways, this building isn’t a house. It’s a research facility. Buried in these walls are enough fibre optic cables to reach the Moon and lasso it. And I want to talk to you about what I’m researching. I want to share it with you. In fact, I want to share it with you so much, it’s eating me up inside.


SusDetectiveSteve

minecraft brick house


AtillaThePundit

TIL houses can have a forehead , and it can be. Five head


helpusgethatrunkout

Looks like Ant or Dec's forehead


Prestigious-Chance56

“A first time buyers dream” 😂


Apprehensive_Pin_620

The architect said his inspiration was the arse side of cinemas, he said ‘I want people to go through their front door and people to watch and wonder “I wonder what they are showing in there?”’


hydrgn

God awful. How does something like that get built? I remember learning in school how they brought in a law requiring windows in the Victorian era.


MeltonPorkPie

Just grim.


Appropriate-Sound169

Make a huge loft room though, and easily add windows


boss-bitchh24

Some people live in some right shitholes


strandy76

Looks like the back of a 60s bingo hall! Nice!


elmachow

Cheaper to replace when they get bricked


AndrewABarber

Fully expected no natural light in the bedrooms…


Wifestealer10

Minecraft house lookin ahh


SortZealousideal5324

My guess, designed by the Council, they didn't need planning permission at one time and put up some monstrosities. The roof space must be epic!


5cmShlong

Looks like my first Minecraft build.


haushinkadaz

If Lawrence Shankland was a house…


Rubyrocke2024

Its the oddest looking house I've seen. Does anyone know the point of all that roof space? Is it one large loft space? Please explain.


Rubyrocke2024

I really want to see in the loft!


ezpzlemonsqueezi

Thats a big forehead


futile_lettuce

Wow I didn’t know a house could have a forehead until now….


lazzzym

Minecraft gone wrong.


willg92

This is near me. A lot of houses in that area has all random different shaped windows. Typical Washington


Able_While_974

When you're using a big tub of random Lego and don't realise until you start the upper floor that you don't have enough window pieces but you're too lazy to undo your work and rearrange.


MitchA-J

There are many similar houses on the same cul-de-sac as this one. Stanhope, Washington, Tyne & Wear.


prolixia

Which windows do you want?  One of each, please.


zzonder

Someone thinking ahead and dodging that window tax that the Gov't is going to implement next year.


Retrogamer2245

At first I wondered if there were rooms built into the roof, but no, they are just very, very tall... What an odd design choice!


Foundation_Wrong

It’s nice inside, well maintained and clean. The outside is absolutely bizarre, and it’s not alone. The whole estate has these stark ugly houses spread through it. What on earth were the architects thinking? Because I’m sure there’s a bonkers, but very well thought out explanation. These were definitely a thing in the 70s because I have some smaller ones near me.


Efficient_Steak_7568

I mean, if I was adding a full bdsm dungeon/kidnap hovel to my house I would also leave it windowless


Leviticus10379

Tallest bungalow ever….. local window cleaner doesn’t have any ladders so there is a practical angle…..


itsEndz

Probably a prison yard built on top so they feel more at home during the exercise period.


Rookie_42

Coneheads live here.


redmolotov

Knew it was Washington the second I saw it 😂


MrPoletski

Somebody sawed a house in half and bricked up the hole.


LiIaIc

Holy shit


BiscuitCrumbsInBed

I've seen some ugly houses on this sub, but this one is easily top 5.


OhMyHessNess

If Gervinho was a building.


daniluvsuall

Think of the loft conversion!


Wild_Ad_6464

r/fivehead


Acting_Normally

It looks like a glitch on the map 😂


Repulsive-Rough2775

It looks like a person with a big forehead


shredditorburnit

Did the Twits build this? Keep people from looking in.


fothergillfuckup

Ah, a Tefal house!


Maximum-Text9634

Looks like Wills haircut from The Fresh Prince of Bel Air.


6ftnsassy

The agent calls it a first time buyers dream - it’s more like a nightmare….


guywithmochi

Reminds me of the houses I used to build when I was 12 years old on sims 2


LordPentecost

If AI designed a house


Madsaxmcginn

Instantly knew where this was, Washington is a plethora of weird 60s/70s experimental, ugly assed architecture.


Fausty72

A Lego house built by a 3yr old would be better proportioned!!


ffjjygvb

Can someone in the area go do a viewing and find out what happened?


An_Ape_called_Joe

How are the upstairs ceilings that low when it's so fuckin' tall?


tapgiles

£3000 per week. 15 bedroom.


kahnindustries

That house has a fivehead