It does but you have to pick a good one also any therapists here you guys need to start understanding your patient more than just labelling them a diagnosis
I’ve always noticed how out of touch some therapists tend to be when they can’t hold empathy or sympathy for their patients and then proceed to just see them as their mental illness/weakness; I personally know people who are practising and FUCK! I’d never book an appointment with them simply because they don’t have that understanding that a person is more than whatever their psychology text book states
I don’t know man. Sometimes I feel like giving up on therapy. I have SO MUCH to get some professional opinion on but hot damn if they’re going to sit there to tell me to be happy, workout, feel my feelings and let go of the past- I’m sure I can tell myself that well enough.
Go to someone who is a specialist in greif counselling or look for someone with Trauma-informed in their title rather than a generic clinical psychologist. For future references, with your issues- seek a CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy)holder, its a form of psychotherapy that is best called talk therapy. It will help you. Please please do more research on the type of psychotherapies that exist rather than going to a psychiatrist because they’re not trained to do any therapy (apart ECT & prescribe medications).
Know the difference between a psychiatrist, a clinical psychologist, & psychotherapists.
Here’s a difference to tell for everyone looking to seek therapy & whom should you go for:
Psychiatrist- go to med school & then specialise in psychiatry in MD, they have a vague idea about DSM & clinical disorders & will do ECT sessions for scizh & rehabilitation works & for substance abuse. They can also prescribe you medications but will not be able to do treatment plans on psychotherapies. They don’t work alone, usually work along with a therapist/psychologist.
Clinical Psychologists (WITH AN MPHIL degree)- Undergo BA, MSc & then Mphil to pursue clinical diagnosis & treatment plans. They may or may not hold extra certifications on psychotherapies. Conduct psychometric testing.
Psychotherapists- Usually with MSc or Mphil- in specific areas of psychotherapies. Like Cognitive Behaviour Therapists, Solution Focused Brief Therapists, Family/Couple Therapists, Behaviour Therapists (DBT)- usually great for kids & child behavioural problems, autism, Rehabilitation therapists dealing with trauma, grief, phobias, delusional disorders, substance abuse, & geriatric population. Looking for long term fixes.
Counselling Psychologists- usually work as consultants or the first person they send to take your case history. Did their BA & MSc & may or may not specific psychotherapy certifications too. Will not be able to diagnose you but will guide you on emotional regulations, almost like a first aid kit to therapy, is good for short term treatments.
If you need further help, kindle DM me. I have long since left psychology (after 2 years of work experience), but I have friends & contact throughout India with specialists on everything.
Don’t be shy in asking for their qualifications- as a professional they have to be transparent with you.
This happens with a lot of clinical psychplogists- because they’re trained to first diagnose the patient. When my friends who are practicing as counselling psychologists, they’re trained to first hear the patient rather than jumping on the diagnosis part.
And I noticed with majority of clinical psychologists who are so quick in putting a label rather than actually having rapport & genuine conversations with the patient.
But then also treatment plans tends to be a bit easier once we know what we’re dealing with. Go to an experienced one who’s actually had certifications in different psychotherapy. Or loom professionals with CBT or SfBT certifications rather than someone with an Mphil title or clinical psychologist role- even if you do find one. Ask them what extra psychotherapy certifications do they hold.
I never suggest going for someone who’s very broad, they will give idiotic statements & no help for problems that you specifically have.
OP, please seek for TRAUMA-informed specialist & go to a grief counselor- not all of us can handle SA, PTSD & grief. These experts will usually charge a bit more but its essential you go to a specialist.
Mine was too until I found this new therapist. Not new considering I've stuck to her for a year or so now. But all the previous ones were absolutely questionable. Some even freely suggested meds to me for anxiety. Told me to keep eating it. I was astounded and scared. But I went through 5 to 6 before landing on this therapist. She has helped me a lot, honestly.
Your therapist has to be sensible and empathetic and your connection needs to work well with him/her. For example, I went to a therapist who didn't help me at all and my husband happened to go to her and his healing was life changing, in a period of just 10 months.
After 5-6 attempts I found a good one and after 2 years I'm doing much better.
Even for depressive cases, therapy only improves symptoms for 40% cases as far as I remember. Definitely not the magic pill it is made out to be in social media.
It can definitely help in healing. But question everything. I don't think therapists should be given too much authority. If you disagree with their diagnosis, get a second opinion. See it as a equal and transactional relationship. If you don't get your money's worth, you can leave.
Even therapists have to of unlearning to do, and some of them from their positions of power don't see that, so they pathologize anything they think is abnormal. I have heard of plenty of misogynist homophobic conservative therapists.
Also reading about modalities can help you understand which modality you vibe with more (narrative, existential, ACT, DBT etc). For example some modalities are very "think happy thoughts" type modality+ very solution focussed. Like CBT. Plenty of people don't vibe with that.
I have consulted only one therapist in my life. Felt she was too dumb to even comprehend what I was saying. She was just acting like a sales person and asking me to take further tests bla bla.
Another experience of my male friend:
He doesn’t want to get married and mentioned the same to the therapist. Therapist, like a typical Indian uncle started lecturing him on how he should consider his parents feelings and get married.
Never knew that therapists pass value judgements on you. There’s no point opening up to someone who can’t even understand where we are coming from
Lol.
In my university there was a therapist and she came to tell us that she is there to help us if we ever feel any issue with mental health. As an anecdote she let us know how one student was coming to her because her parents were not accepting her and her boyfriend's relationship, and their plan for marriage. And her solution was to tell her that she needs be grateful for what her parents have done for her, stop being selfish and obey them. She was quite proud of this solution.
At some point I stopped counting the number of therapists I’d been to (and psychiatrists). Some lasted two months, some 11 months. But on the whole it wasn’t anything to write home about. Idk if it’s something to do with the training they get here or what, but when i compare my therapy experiences with those of my friends’ abroad, it’s like chalk and cheese. To the point that more than the ones I was seeing, I benefited from trickle-down therapy by listening to the advice my friends’ therapists were giving them!
Having said that, I’ve started seeing someone new recently, who seems to have a better head on her shoulders than all the others I’ve seen so far. Keeping my fingers crossed (even though they all seem good in the beginning).
Agreed. Therapists have kinda helped me a little...maybe by just providing me a good open space to vent. Did I learn something new? No.
If you already have a good support system in your family and friends, you wouldn't need to go to a therapist to vent.
YouTube (and sometimes even insta) were a much better source to learn how to deal with my issues. I've listed some channels that helped me.
1. Healthygamer (mock therapy sessions)
2. Medcircle (understanding DSM criteria for all mental health issues objectively, types of therapies)
3. Heidi Priebe (self esteem, relationships etc)
Your experiences sound super unprofessional, but I’m
not surprised it seems like you dealt with councillors rather than therapists. A common misconception is that therapists can deal with everything mental health related, they actually have their specific expert topics. Also some of them are just bad. The easiest way to spot a bad therapist is when they don’t have expertise in specific areas. Would you go to a restaurant that sells pizzas, dosas AND underwear? And trauma-work is the trickiest topic for therapists. So you really have to research on the best options available to you.
Check the extensive crowd-sourced lists provided by TwoX and Mahima Kukreja, maybe you’ll find someone suitable there? Some specifically state that they deal with trauma-work, grief counselling, etc.
1) [TwoXIn list](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pzckT6ns2H1IlmwYwJa8EnBh_1u3gRA9cEOoA4zfilc/htmlview#gid=370032083)
2) [MK list](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uEeTDdu58z8nVLbBG8o1qY2xbOhlb9TRVx5COnw2ZiQ/mobilebasic)
I would recommend you do your own research, call them up ask them what areas they deal with. Talk about yourself, maybe try and get a taster session and go from there.
I have heard that you need to find the right therapist for you but damn this is bad.
Being sexually assaulted as a child is okay. What the actual fuck!
Second one sound funny, connecting people to machines like it's the Matrix.
Third one... who gave them the degree when they don't know how to treat even the mainstream issues like depression.
All this is why I haven't approached a therapist so far. Good ones are so hard to come by
I'd say look for a therapist first and if they find anything that needs to be referred to a psychiatrist, they'll let you know.
But yeah, it's a tedious process but you gotta try until you find the right therapist. A couple of times when I searched, I looked out for someone who is slightly older than me (so that there's not a lot of generation gap) and someone who knows my language and gets the cultural reference etc.
If you would like to try, you can check the Alternative Story based out of Bangalore but available online too.
Unfortunately finding a good therapist is like looking for a needle in the haystack.
It’s terribly frustrating and expensive to find someone who matches your value system.
Fortunately, these days Instagram has some therapists posting their content, and while am generally wary of Instagram doctors, the therapists’ content helps me understand if their values align with mine.
Finding a good therapist is truly like finding a good partner - you need to look around, try a few before you find the one.
I have cptsd, so finding the right one was crucial. My first one was utterly useless, I didn't go back after the initial session. My next one, she was incredible - we did a lot of inner child healing work. Before her, I constantly had an inner voice that shamed myself and I always felt guilty. After our work together, that voice has COMPLETELY disappeared. Honestly, I'm so grateful to her for this, because I felt so much lighter. It was like a burden lifted off of my shoulders.
I then had to change therapists due to location, and luckily, my next one was also incredible. We did so much work together. I'd become afraid to build new friendships, afraid to take necessary steps towards my career and I had difficulty regulating my emotions. Together, we worked on all of these things and I've made wonderful new, deep friendships, have taken baby steps towards furthering my career and I'm trying every day to regulate my emotions using the tools she's provided. I've grown so much as a person over a year's work together.
Therapy does take work. Finding the right therapist is the first step. Willingness to put in the work and truly self-reflect is next. Also, it's good to remember that healing isn't linear. You can take one step forward and then two steps backwards. And that's completely normal and fine. DM me if you'd like to contact one of the above mentioned therapists.
Editing to add that neither the first or the third person you saw has any business being in the field of mental health. No decent therapist would say such things. Wish the laws in India were more rigid, because it seems like any clown with a degree can mess with people's minds.
I promise you, there are amazing therapists out there who genuinely care about your well-being and will hold space for you and validate your feelings.
Spend more time on reddit than at therapist. It is much better , honestly.
This may be controversial but I never understood a role of psychiatrist /therapist etc etc but i understand different people have different methods of getting over their unpleasant past or present.
It does but you have to pick a good one also any therapists here you guys need to start understanding your patient more than just labelling them a diagnosis I’ve always noticed how out of touch some therapists tend to be when they can’t hold empathy or sympathy for their patients and then proceed to just see them as their mental illness/weakness; I personally know people who are practising and FUCK! I’d never book an appointment with them simply because they don’t have that understanding that a person is more than whatever their psychology text book states
I don’t know man. Sometimes I feel like giving up on therapy. I have SO MUCH to get some professional opinion on but hot damn if they’re going to sit there to tell me to be happy, workout, feel my feelings and let go of the past- I’m sure I can tell myself that well enough.
Yeah sometimes you just want to be heard, maybe try finding a cognitive behavioural therapist
Go to someone who is a specialist in greif counselling or look for someone with Trauma-informed in their title rather than a generic clinical psychologist. For future references, with your issues- seek a CBT (cognitive behaviour therapy)holder, its a form of psychotherapy that is best called talk therapy. It will help you. Please please do more research on the type of psychotherapies that exist rather than going to a psychiatrist because they’re not trained to do any therapy (apart ECT & prescribe medications). Know the difference between a psychiatrist, a clinical psychologist, & psychotherapists. Here’s a difference to tell for everyone looking to seek therapy & whom should you go for: Psychiatrist- go to med school & then specialise in psychiatry in MD, they have a vague idea about DSM & clinical disorders & will do ECT sessions for scizh & rehabilitation works & for substance abuse. They can also prescribe you medications but will not be able to do treatment plans on psychotherapies. They don’t work alone, usually work along with a therapist/psychologist. Clinical Psychologists (WITH AN MPHIL degree)- Undergo BA, MSc & then Mphil to pursue clinical diagnosis & treatment plans. They may or may not hold extra certifications on psychotherapies. Conduct psychometric testing. Psychotherapists- Usually with MSc or Mphil- in specific areas of psychotherapies. Like Cognitive Behaviour Therapists, Solution Focused Brief Therapists, Family/Couple Therapists, Behaviour Therapists (DBT)- usually great for kids & child behavioural problems, autism, Rehabilitation therapists dealing with trauma, grief, phobias, delusional disorders, substance abuse, & geriatric population. Looking for long term fixes. Counselling Psychologists- usually work as consultants or the first person they send to take your case history. Did their BA & MSc & may or may not specific psychotherapy certifications too. Will not be able to diagnose you but will guide you on emotional regulations, almost like a first aid kit to therapy, is good for short term treatments. If you need further help, kindle DM me. I have long since left psychology (after 2 years of work experience), but I have friends & contact throughout India with specialists on everything. Don’t be shy in asking for their qualifications- as a professional they have to be transparent with you.
This happens with a lot of clinical psychplogists- because they’re trained to first diagnose the patient. When my friends who are practicing as counselling psychologists, they’re trained to first hear the patient rather than jumping on the diagnosis part. And I noticed with majority of clinical psychologists who are so quick in putting a label rather than actually having rapport & genuine conversations with the patient. But then also treatment plans tends to be a bit easier once we know what we’re dealing with. Go to an experienced one who’s actually had certifications in different psychotherapy. Or loom professionals with CBT or SfBT certifications rather than someone with an Mphil title or clinical psychologist role- even if you do find one. Ask them what extra psychotherapy certifications do they hold. I never suggest going for someone who’s very broad, they will give idiotic statements & no help for problems that you specifically have. OP, please seek for TRAUMA-informed specialist & go to a grief counselor- not all of us can handle SA, PTSD & grief. These experts will usually charge a bit more but its essential you go to a specialist.
Mine was too until I found this new therapist. Not new considering I've stuck to her for a year or so now. But all the previous ones were absolutely questionable. Some even freely suggested meds to me for anxiety. Told me to keep eating it. I was astounded and scared. But I went through 5 to 6 before landing on this therapist. She has helped me a lot, honestly.
I'm happy to hear that , Bubbles.
Your therapist has to be sensible and empathetic and your connection needs to work well with him/her. For example, I went to a therapist who didn't help me at all and my husband happened to go to her and his healing was life changing, in a period of just 10 months. After 5-6 attempts I found a good one and after 2 years I'm doing much better.
Happy to hear that. I'll try this approach.
Even for depressive cases, therapy only improves symptoms for 40% cases as far as I remember. Definitely not the magic pill it is made out to be in social media. It can definitely help in healing. But question everything. I don't think therapists should be given too much authority. If you disagree with their diagnosis, get a second opinion. See it as a equal and transactional relationship. If you don't get your money's worth, you can leave. Even therapists have to of unlearning to do, and some of them from their positions of power don't see that, so they pathologize anything they think is abnormal. I have heard of plenty of misogynist homophobic conservative therapists. Also reading about modalities can help you understand which modality you vibe with more (narrative, existential, ACT, DBT etc). For example some modalities are very "think happy thoughts" type modality+ very solution focussed. Like CBT. Plenty of people don't vibe with that.
That's quite informative. Thank you. I'll try to understand things better.
I have consulted only one therapist in my life. Felt she was too dumb to even comprehend what I was saying. She was just acting like a sales person and asking me to take further tests bla bla. Another experience of my male friend: He doesn’t want to get married and mentioned the same to the therapist. Therapist, like a typical Indian uncle started lecturing him on how he should consider his parents feelings and get married. Never knew that therapists pass value judgements on you. There’s no point opening up to someone who can’t even understand where we are coming from
Lol. In my university there was a therapist and she came to tell us that she is there to help us if we ever feel any issue with mental health. As an anecdote she let us know how one student was coming to her because her parents were not accepting her and her boyfriend's relationship, and their plan for marriage. And her solution was to tell her that she needs be grateful for what her parents have done for her, stop being selfish and obey them. She was quite proud of this solution.
Yeah I realised they are all Indians first therapists next 😃
At some point I stopped counting the number of therapists I’d been to (and psychiatrists). Some lasted two months, some 11 months. But on the whole it wasn’t anything to write home about. Idk if it’s something to do with the training they get here or what, but when i compare my therapy experiences with those of my friends’ abroad, it’s like chalk and cheese. To the point that more than the ones I was seeing, I benefited from trickle-down therapy by listening to the advice my friends’ therapists were giving them! Having said that, I’ve started seeing someone new recently, who seems to have a better head on her shoulders than all the others I’ve seen so far. Keeping my fingers crossed (even though they all seem good in the beginning).
Agreed. Therapists have kinda helped me a little...maybe by just providing me a good open space to vent. Did I learn something new? No. If you already have a good support system in your family and friends, you wouldn't need to go to a therapist to vent. YouTube (and sometimes even insta) were a much better source to learn how to deal with my issues. I've listed some channels that helped me. 1. Healthygamer (mock therapy sessions) 2. Medcircle (understanding DSM criteria for all mental health issues objectively, types of therapies) 3. Heidi Priebe (self esteem, relationships etc)
thanks a lot bro. I'll look into these!
Your experiences sound super unprofessional, but I’m not surprised it seems like you dealt with councillors rather than therapists. A common misconception is that therapists can deal with everything mental health related, they actually have their specific expert topics. Also some of them are just bad. The easiest way to spot a bad therapist is when they don’t have expertise in specific areas. Would you go to a restaurant that sells pizzas, dosas AND underwear? And trauma-work is the trickiest topic for therapists. So you really have to research on the best options available to you. Check the extensive crowd-sourced lists provided by TwoX and Mahima Kukreja, maybe you’ll find someone suitable there? Some specifically state that they deal with trauma-work, grief counselling, etc. 1) [TwoXIn list](https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1pzckT6ns2H1IlmwYwJa8EnBh_1u3gRA9cEOoA4zfilc/htmlview#gid=370032083) 2) [MK list](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uEeTDdu58z8nVLbBG8o1qY2xbOhlb9TRVx5COnw2ZiQ/mobilebasic) I would recommend you do your own research, call them up ask them what areas they deal with. Talk about yourself, maybe try and get a taster session and go from there.
Thank you so much for sharing these resources. I'll look into these.
I have heard that you need to find the right therapist for you but damn this is bad. Being sexually assaulted as a child is okay. What the actual fuck! Second one sound funny, connecting people to machines like it's the Matrix. Third one... who gave them the degree when they don't know how to treat even the mainstream issues like depression. All this is why I haven't approached a therapist so far. Good ones are so hard to come by
True. It’s been quite a ride.
I'd say look for a therapist first and if they find anything that needs to be referred to a psychiatrist, they'll let you know. But yeah, it's a tedious process but you gotta try until you find the right therapist. A couple of times when I searched, I looked out for someone who is slightly older than me (so that there's not a lot of generation gap) and someone who knows my language and gets the cultural reference etc. If you would like to try, you can check the Alternative Story based out of Bangalore but available online too.
Unfortunately finding a good therapist is like looking for a needle in the haystack. It’s terribly frustrating and expensive to find someone who matches your value system. Fortunately, these days Instagram has some therapists posting their content, and while am generally wary of Instagram doctors, the therapists’ content helps me understand if their values align with mine.
Finding a good therapist is truly like finding a good partner - you need to look around, try a few before you find the one. I have cptsd, so finding the right one was crucial. My first one was utterly useless, I didn't go back after the initial session. My next one, she was incredible - we did a lot of inner child healing work. Before her, I constantly had an inner voice that shamed myself and I always felt guilty. After our work together, that voice has COMPLETELY disappeared. Honestly, I'm so grateful to her for this, because I felt so much lighter. It was like a burden lifted off of my shoulders. I then had to change therapists due to location, and luckily, my next one was also incredible. We did so much work together. I'd become afraid to build new friendships, afraid to take necessary steps towards my career and I had difficulty regulating my emotions. Together, we worked on all of these things and I've made wonderful new, deep friendships, have taken baby steps towards furthering my career and I'm trying every day to regulate my emotions using the tools she's provided. I've grown so much as a person over a year's work together. Therapy does take work. Finding the right therapist is the first step. Willingness to put in the work and truly self-reflect is next. Also, it's good to remember that healing isn't linear. You can take one step forward and then two steps backwards. And that's completely normal and fine. DM me if you'd like to contact one of the above mentioned therapists. Editing to add that neither the first or the third person you saw has any business being in the field of mental health. No decent therapist would say such things. Wish the laws in India were more rigid, because it seems like any clown with a degree can mess with people's minds. I promise you, there are amazing therapists out there who genuinely care about your well-being and will hold space for you and validate your feelings.
Spend more time on reddit than at therapist. It is much better , honestly. This may be controversial but I never understood a role of psychiatrist /therapist etc etc but i understand different people have different methods of getting over their unpleasant past or present.