Here in Germany most couples have identical rings. I have barely ever seen a couple wearing differnt rings. And it is a simple band in most cases. Often gold, but not always. My two best friends married two years ago. Their wedding bands were simple steel, made by the groom's father. They also have one made from iron that the bride's grandfather mined himself, but don't wear it often, mostly they are in a showcase cabinet.
I didn't even know there was a difference.
I have a jar of teeth that I had pulled ages ago (I have too many teeth due to hyperdontia) I plan on making a necklace of it if I ever marry.
That’s cool and a respectable choice. I’ve thought that assigning gender to forms makes little sense. You are choosing function over form and that says a lot about a person.
I really appreciate the sentient. If anything, I go too far in that direction. My family had to nag me into getting a single fake plant for my dorm room. XP
Why not just get a real one if you're getting one anyway? There's lots of plants that don't require babying, African violets and calanhoes jump to mind, also succulents or cacti. "Too" anything is a judgement call and only valid if you yourself think so. They don't need to like your dorm room if they don't live in it daily; you do :)
Everyone has different tastes and just because you're related doesn't mean it has to be the same. If you're a woman, anything you do is feminine or womanly, because how can it not be? In that vein, if a woman wears combat boots, they are feminine. If a woman is a construction worker, that's a female profession, literally, for that person. The same goes for men. If a man wears a dress, it is now masculine. If a man works as a nanny, it's a male profession, for that person. You get to decide that it is or isn't "you". Nobody else does.. or they have to welcome you telling them what you think about their choices and no whining! :D
We waste so much time on pleasing people that don't put the same amount of effort into pleasing us. You are allowed to love yourself and do what makes you happy :)
My friend had a custom ring made. It's not very wide, so it's still feminine, but it's very simple and smooth. The three small diamonds in there are embedded into the gold and smoothed out so it never gets caught onto fabrics. It's really beautiful as well, with waves made into it that are a different texture (kind of super finely sanded so the gold becomes dull). That together with the smooth gold is stunning.
Now that you say it, I’m thinking about married women I know and all of them have a simple band. Maybe the engagement ring was the kind with the outward gem, but the actual ring that they have on an everyday base is a simple band, and this goes for people in their 30s to people in their 90s, so it’s not about fashion. It makes sense, if you keep it on everyday, you don’t want it getting stuck on stuff while you are using your hands.
That's a good idea. You may not know this but there are different shapes of rings.
There is the classic 0 shape (lord of the rings ring) but that can slip off easy and can be solid and thus more expensive. There is a C shape which people get as it holds on the finger better but I found them to be harsh on the edges and it dug into my finger when I tried it on. I ended up going with the D shape. It is round on the outside but smoother on the inside but still rounded. It fits best and is the most comfortable imo. The shape of the ring refers to the shape and thickness of the band so a side on shape.
I still fiddle with the band constantly. It has become a stim for me although I would be driven mad if I had a jagged ring so I definitely think you are having the right idea about this
I hope this helps and good luck finding love.
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I fully support this. As someone who has tried out many rings, the only one I can stand is my plain gold wedding band. It's rounded too, because flat ones can dig in to your skin.... I once had a diamond solitaire engagement ring and I'd never wear it because it would get caught on everything, it would flip around constantly from the weight of it, and the prongs cut me several times. it sits in a box now.
What you want is a wedding band and not an engagement ring. I have a simple band. We agreed not to get me a traditional engagement ring because (1.) I wouldn't like wearing it (2) I'm almost guaranteed to lose it.
I have been with my husband for 17 years, I wore a simple wedding band for about 12 years before I switched to having a little heart tattooed on my ring finger
I have both… I started out with just a band, but this year I also got one with some stones. I have tapered, skinny fingers so most rings will just spin around. I got a very low profile one. It still spins but it is just another thing for me to fidget with. I already pick at my fingers pretty non stop, so it’s not terrible to spin around a ring instead…
MEN AND WOMEN HAVE DIFFERENT TYPES OF WEDDING RINGS?!??
Like I knew of the different types of rings such as the ones with big gems or wedding bands, but I never thought of them as gender specific
A long time ago in a different pre-diagnosis lifetime, a NB partner bought me a ring.
It was novel at first but quickly became a sensory nightmare. I don't wear chains or anything else like that for the same reasons.
They took it really badly that I hated wearing the damn ring. Really badly.
Here in Germany most couples have identical rings. I have barely ever seen a couple wearing differnt rings. And it is a simple band in most cases. Often gold, but not always. My two best friends married two years ago. Their wedding bands were simple steel, made by the groom's father. They also have one made from iron that the bride's grandfather mined himself, but don't wear it often, mostly they are in a showcase cabinet.
Same in France.
I didn't even know there was a difference. I have a jar of teeth that I had pulled ages ago (I have too many teeth due to hyperdontia) I plan on making a necklace of it if I ever marry.
That’s cool and a respectable choice. I’ve thought that assigning gender to forms makes little sense. You are choosing function over form and that says a lot about a person.
I really appreciate the sentient. If anything, I go too far in that direction. My family had to nag me into getting a single fake plant for my dorm room. XP
You should make the fake plant look like it died as a joke.
Why not just get a real one if you're getting one anyway? There's lots of plants that don't require babying, African violets and calanhoes jump to mind, also succulents or cacti. "Too" anything is a judgement call and only valid if you yourself think so. They don't need to like your dorm room if they don't live in it daily; you do :) Everyone has different tastes and just because you're related doesn't mean it has to be the same. If you're a woman, anything you do is feminine or womanly, because how can it not be? In that vein, if a woman wears combat boots, they are feminine. If a woman is a construction worker, that's a female profession, literally, for that person. The same goes for men. If a man wears a dress, it is now masculine. If a man works as a nanny, it's a male profession, for that person. You get to decide that it is or isn't "you". Nobody else does.. or they have to welcome you telling them what you think about their choices and no whining! :D We waste so much time on pleasing people that don't put the same amount of effort into pleasing us. You are allowed to love yourself and do what makes you happy :)
My friend had a custom ring made. It's not very wide, so it's still feminine, but it's very simple and smooth. The three small diamonds in there are embedded into the gold and smoothed out so it never gets caught onto fabrics. It's really beautiful as well, with waves made into it that are a different texture (kind of super finely sanded so the gold becomes dull). That together with the smooth gold is stunning.
That's a good idea actually. I'll consider that for the future.
Now that you say it, I’m thinking about married women I know and all of them have a simple band. Maybe the engagement ring was the kind with the outward gem, but the actual ring that they have on an everyday base is a simple band, and this goes for people in their 30s to people in their 90s, so it’s not about fashion. It makes sense, if you keep it on everyday, you don’t want it getting stuck on stuff while you are using your hands.
me too, i think it’s more common for us to like androgyny in general, but also fewer stupid little jewels that could potentially get caught or damaged
I didn’t know wedding rings were gendered; my parents just have matching ones which are just a silver band.
My parents use gold bands. A classic, nice looking and both look pretty much the same.
That's a good idea. You may not know this but there are different shapes of rings. There is the classic 0 shape (lord of the rings ring) but that can slip off easy and can be solid and thus more expensive. There is a C shape which people get as it holds on the finger better but I found them to be harsh on the edges and it dug into my finger when I tried it on. I ended up going with the D shape. It is round on the outside but smoother on the inside but still rounded. It fits best and is the most comfortable imo. The shape of the ring refers to the shape and thickness of the band so a side on shape. I still fiddle with the band constantly. It has become a stim for me although I would be driven mad if I had a jagged ring so I definitely think you are having the right idea about this I hope this helps and good luck finding love.
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I fully support this. As someone who has tried out many rings, the only one I can stand is my plain gold wedding band. It's rounded too, because flat ones can dig in to your skin.... I once had a diamond solitaire engagement ring and I'd never wear it because it would get caught on everything, it would flip around constantly from the weight of it, and the prongs cut me several times. it sits in a box now.
What you want is a wedding band and not an engagement ring. I have a simple band. We agreed not to get me a traditional engagement ring because (1.) I wouldn't like wearing it (2) I'm almost guaranteed to lose it.
Go for it
I have been with my husband for 17 years, I wore a simple wedding band for about 12 years before I switched to having a little heart tattooed on my ring finger
I have both… I started out with just a band, but this year I also got one with some stones. I have tapered, skinny fingers so most rings will just spin around. I got a very low profile one. It still spins but it is just another thing for me to fidget with. I already pick at my fingers pretty non stop, so it’s not terrible to spin around a ring instead…
MEN AND WOMEN HAVE DIFFERENT TYPES OF WEDDING RINGS?!?? Like I knew of the different types of rings such as the ones with big gems or wedding bands, but I never thought of them as gender specific
A long time ago in a different pre-diagnosis lifetime, a NB partner bought me a ring. It was novel at first but quickly became a sensory nightmare. I don't wear chains or anything else like that for the same reasons. They took it really badly that I hated wearing the damn ring. Really badly.
No such thing. A ring is a ring. Get whatever you want.