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Bear was testing. Since he didn't back down after that, bear did. Guy should get some antibiotics though, who knows what gnarly things are growing on a bear claw.
That bear was basically saying “ok Paul, I’ll leave. But I have to explain myself to my people as well. I’m going to initiate a bear move and it will be a swipe, and sorry but it’s going to need to leave a mark. Tell the story how you want but you were attacked by a bear. We both win Paul. “
My nephew was born with his right arm ending just below his elbow. Little children have no filter so they will just walk up to him and ask what happened to it. His answer changes depending on where he is. At the beach? A shark. Out in the woods? A tiger.
My father (a veterinarian) had a coworker without an arm. He once told me he lost it by checking if an elephant was pregnant and she squeeshed his ass. You have to put your hand through the cow's anus to feel the uterus, I helped my father many times doing it, so I believed it.
I had several moles removed from my back. Once at the beach someone gave me a six pack, in a cooler with ice, and said "thanks for your service". And I just stood there dumbfounded and said, "uhhh, ok" and they walked away. I assume they thought I had a purple heart or something. I never asked, never claimed any heroics, but I definitely drank the beer and the cooler is my goto for a couple hours on the boat now.
Maybe a few pellets from a shotgun. I also have a good scar on my shoulder from a cyst removal. I really have no clue. My friends were confused as well.
Big difference between a black bear and a brown bear. Brown Bears are fighters they’ll kill you and leave the body just for something to do. Black bears are more…diplomatic. Usually they’re just hungry and take advantage of their ‘bear’ reputation to scare creatures into giving up. If that doesn’t work they usually back down.
>Black bears are more…diplomatic.
https://preview.redd.it/orbg3i5gb13d1.jpeg?width=614&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d564f18eda9d48f5d05ac9b91ca9a9612135e35
Every other species of bear: avoid by making a lot of noise to scare them off before they see you
Polar bears: don't make a fucking sound and pray it doesn't find you cuz you're actively being hunted
As cool as it may seem, I hope nobody will take the picture as a direct instruction. I'd like to share a useful comment from
u/anythingthric3
"Though I will disclaim by saying that I was a trained professional. Do not approach or interact with bears if you can help it. Before you go into bear country get trained. What follows is NOT a substitution for actual training and experience.
Behavior and context is everything with bears. They have a lot of body language that communicates what they're feeling. While in general, grizz are more dangerous (they're more likely to hunt and less likely to scare off), if a bear seems really stressed and agitated, it is defensive. Get your deterrent (spray) ready, speak calmly and leave the way you came. Do not run. Ever. If contact is imminent, drop your belly to the ground, cover your head and neck, and do not let the bear flip you over. It will hopefully bat you around a bit then leave. In an ideal situation the bear will leave the area, then you can leave.
On the other hand, if the bear seems playful or curious and keeps following you, ears up and forward, it's possible it's hunting. Get your deterrent ready, get as big and loud and aggressive as you can so it knows it will have to fight. Group together with others and back away to safety.
Obviously none of that is a guarantee. Stay safe in the bush, y'all"
Honestly, it seems like the guys mistake in the video (well, biggest mistake) was opening the gate and standing so close to the bear's avenue of escape with his arm out.
Do you think he avoids getting swiped at, if he just opens the gate and backs away?
Good point. That stood out to me too. Intention was very unclear there. Pointing doesn't really seem to work with most if not all animals. It's not a regular sign unless drilled into them. It's probably more like flashing a weapon in this case (and our hands are indeed weapons of a sort)
He did interestingly well otherwise.
(My opinion is Yes to your Q, but no bear professional)
The guy stood his ground and remained calm, [which is the best response in that situation for these bears](https://www.nps.gov/articles/bearattacks.htm). If he had responded differently or reacted to the swipe, it would have gone poorly for him
Alright joke time:
So a bear walks into a bar in Billings Montana. The bear (a he) walks up to bar, sits down and says "bar keep! one beer please!" The bar keep walks over and says "Sorry but we don't sell beer, to bears, in bars, in Billings."
The bear fucking loses it. "What do you mean you don't sell beer to bears in bars in Billings?!" The bar keep remains solid "Sorry but we don't sell beer to bears in bars in Billings."
After some back and forth the bear tells the bar keep: "Listen, if you don't serve me a beer.. You see that lady down there? I'm going to eat her."
Bar keep: "Sorry, we don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings"
The bear walks promptly to the end of the bar and eats the lady up and walks back to the bar keep. "Give me a beer."
Bar keep: "Sorry we don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings, and on drugs"
The bear puzzled says "on drugs?! I dont do drugs I just want a beer!"
The bar keep: "That lady you just ate down there.. That was a barbiturate.
Funny urban legend: back in the nineties a bunch of kids went out for a camping trip by lake chelan and brought a few cases of beer.
While they were out swimming, a bear got into their camp, trashed the place ate most of the food and had bitten into and drank two cases of ranier beer. The cases of pbr were mostly untouched except for a can that was bitten but was still half full.
The rangers eventually found the bear lounging drunk in a tree. After some prodding, they’d managed to lure the bear out of the tree with a can of ranier.
Dude was lit like a Christmas tree light. He got way too political when the bear in the woods argument came up. It was totally uncalled for. Bear needed to go hibernate those 40 oz bottles off.
I would not be surprised if Shittymorph has it set up where they get emails from Google about how many times they are mentioned per day. Enough mentions after a certain period of time and BOOM.
I’m glad he’s okay. But still. It’s not like that fucking bear understood the man’s intentions. These animals don’t make fucking deals with us, nor do they negotiate. The bear simply assessed and with instinct decided it wasn’t worth figuring out this motherfucker or what he was about. Instead he decided to just move on to the garbage cans. He just as easily could have stood up and swiped his face off in front of all his friends.
In a sense though, the guy did exactly what needed to be done. Animals are constantly running threat vs. reward calculations. Right now, he's surrounded by a herd of apes. The apes do not appear particularly threatenting.
If all the apes scatter, this implies they are no threat. If a leader advances threateningly, then I must leave or they will attack me collectively. This is how many social animals work. If the man had attacked, the bear would have shredded him. But he basically just said, "Our territory, you have to leave" and the bear left because whatever food he wanted didn't seem worth it to have a bunch of drunk apes attacking him.
He definitely didn't do the right thing. The right thing to do is to be loud, aggressive, and encourage the bear to move in a certain direction WITHOUT getting within swiping distance. Even though the guy was an idiot who deliberately walked up to a bear and stood close enough for it to hit him, the fact that it struck at him and made contact means that it's much more likely to be euthanized.
He's honestly lucky. That was just the bear testing him and "barely" even touched the surface of what it could have really done with a slightly harder swipe.
> That was just the bear testing him
yup, and when you don't run that gets the bear a little scared about how badly that fight could go. We look huge to him considering we are standing upright all the time, not just when we stop.
For black bears fhis is the way, get big and get loud and dominate. This dude just had the im the boss attitude about him that the bear picked up on.
Now any other color bear and this would have ended very diffrently.
Note: brown bears are not always brown, black bears are not always black.
Unless you 100% know what kind of bear you are dealing with you should always assume it could turn and attack you. If you're camping in a new area always do research on what's around.
My grandfather used to have local bear family knock on his sliding glass door and he would feed them. If they became a little too friendly while we were outside he would follow them off the property while banging pots and pans. Allowing a bear to be that close and behind you is stupid regardless of how much you know them.
Could have EASILY had his guts for garters if the bear decided they wanted that. I have seen them open the side of a metal garbage can with their claws like it was tinfoil. Guy is very lucky.
This is exactly what struck me. The bear showed the slightest amount of aggression and the man was left with red claw marks on his plump abdomen. He was grinning, but I think I saw behind his eyes the realization of how lucky he was.
Videos like this always remind me how similar we are to primates. The way the people go in closer then kinda scramble back, the unsure looking around, everyone yelling while watching the one monkey doing something dangerous. It all looks like the videos I’ve seen of monkeys and apes messing around with a snake or something, only it’s a bear and the monkeys are pale and hairless
All you gotta do is watch people rioting over something or celebrating en mass after a sports event and it's extremely evident that we're cousins of apes.
It’s “black, fight back.” Not “black, walk calmly up to them, don’t make yourself bigger or present yourself as a threat in anyway, and turn your back to the bear multiple times.”
If that guy would have showed any sign of fear during the stare down at the end, he would have been a gonner! His drunkenness might literally have saved his life.
I'm gonna walk with this dude. He looks cool. He's smoking a cigar. He'll point me to the hot dogs.
WTF dude? Are you kicking me out? I thought we were buddies. Bitch where the hot dogs at!?
Nah, screw these drunk humans, I'll go get myself some trash buffet.
Black bears are usually pretty timid, especially with loud noises. If you bang pots and pans they will probably take off. I've been around plenty and they bolt when you shout
This bear is fat AF and has probably spent a ton of time around human populated areas stealing food and stuff. Not as timid, but I think it would have run if they started shouting and looking big. But it also could have been spooked into attacking if it felt trapped, so all in all this worked out okay
To be fair, that saying is only applicable when you’re actively being attacked. If you’re simply in the presence of a bear, it’s different. There are lots of conflicting answers whenever you look up advice for how to deal with a bear encounter. But in general, best practice is to not act like prey (don’t run away, don’t turn you back), to huddle together if you have people with you, and to make yourself as unappealing as possible. You want the bear to think “ugh, I don’t wanna deal with that”. They’re generally not going to attack someone who seems bigger, harder to take down, etc. I would never recommend physically touching or fighting a black bear unless it’s already trying to maul you. Just stay back, make yourself look bigger, and sometimes excessive noise will get them to leave.
I grew up in Northern BC where black bears are so common that this situation occurs all the time.
Lots of guys would just yell at black bears to fuck off and they usually would. They are more seen as a pest animal with capacity to be dangerous rather than a dangerous predator.
I was shocked when I moved to the city and they will cancel whole events if a black bear is spotted in the area.
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Bear: * Swipes at Mike * Mike: "Hey!... No!" Bear: * leaves *
Swipes at Mike Refuses to elaborate further Leaves
Swipes at Mike Takes a cool seat for about 12 seconds Leaves
"well i guess you're Not going to die From that, hu? Aight, Ima head Out"
He’s like “I’m leaving on my own, not because you told me to 😒”
Bear was testing. Since he didn't back down after that, bear did. Guy should get some antibiotics though, who knows what gnarly things are growing on a bear claw.
[удалено]
*He bearly got you* 🐻
*But it’s gonna leave a grisly scar.* (I know it’s a black bear.)
Brought to you by Progressive Insurance.
I feel like that bear practiced a lot of restraint
That bear was basically saying “ok Paul, I’ll leave. But I have to explain myself to my people as well. I’m going to initiate a bear move and it will be a swipe, and sorry but it’s going to need to leave a mark. Tell the story how you want but you were attacked by a bear. We both win Paul. “
Oh my. I have a HUGE scar on my arm and a couple on my back and i love changing the story of how i got them when the vibe needs a kick.
My nephew was born with his right arm ending just below his elbow. Little children have no filter so they will just walk up to him and ask what happened to it. His answer changes depending on where he is. At the beach? A shark. Out in the woods? A tiger.
My father (a veterinarian) had a coworker without an arm. He once told me he lost it by checking if an elephant was pregnant and she squeeshed his ass. You have to put your hand through the cow's anus to feel the uterus, I helped my father many times doing it, so I believed it.
"Let's just say that when the bus driver tells you not to stick your arm out the window, YOU LISTEN TO HIM!"
You, too, were attacked by a tiger?
Cougar, her name was Stella.
STELLLLAAAAAAAAA!
Can't you hear me yelllaaa
I had several moles removed from my back. Once at the beach someone gave me a six pack, in a cooler with ice, and said "thanks for your service". And I just stood there dumbfounded and said, "uhhh, ok" and they walked away. I assume they thought I had a purple heart or something. I never asked, never claimed any heroics, but I definitely drank the beer and the cooler is my goto for a couple hours on the boat now.
My guess is the scars where the moles used to be look like bullet wounds?
Maybe a few pellets from a shotgun. I also have a good scar on my shoulder from a cyst removal. I really have no clue. My friends were confused as well.
Thanks for your service.
Where's my beer and cooler?
Shrapnel
Burple Heart
I never liked dancing at the clubs, and if someone asked, I would say I hurt my knee in ‘Nam. I was born well after it ended.
The country still exists, so technically you could still get hurt there.
I broke my big toe during the Superbowl. Banged it on a piece of furniture jumping up to cheer after a play
Were you there in the 90s to start a sweat shop?
A lot of good men died in that sweatshop!
Agree, but you have to agree to stop calling me Paul, my name is Mike.
Hahah thanks, that got me good. - except his name is Mike.
Big difference between a black bear and a brown bear. Brown Bears are fighters they’ll kill you and leave the body just for something to do. Black bears are more…diplomatic. Usually they’re just hungry and take advantage of their ‘bear’ reputation to scare creatures into giving up. If that doesn’t work they usually back down.
Tank racoons
>Black bears are more…diplomatic. https://preview.redd.it/orbg3i5gb13d1.jpeg?width=614&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4d564f18eda9d48f5d05ac9b91ca9a9612135e35
I figured it was nicer than calling them gigantic fucking cowards.
They decided to sell out and adapt to Humans.. Like Pandas but less excessive
With polar bears, you are lunch, plain and simple.
polar bears are psychopaths and we have to save them or they will go extinct
If you lived in an environment that is probably the harsher place to live on Earth, you would be cranky too lol.
Yeah but I can't swim. Balance in all things
They are not psychopaths. Just bipolar.
If it’s black, fight back If it’s brown, lay down If it’s white, good night
If it’s black and white, then Kung-Fu fight!
Haha that was perfect! 😆🤣
Every other species of bear: avoid by making a lot of noise to scare them off before they see you Polar bears: don't make a fucking sound and pray it doesn't find you cuz you're actively being hunted
https://preview.redd.it/oajaajnpb13d1.jpeg?width=749&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=46b509b0879e0e13f357a7d03091ab1adba014c1
As cool as it may seem, I hope nobody will take the picture as a direct instruction. I'd like to share a useful comment from u/anythingthric3 "Though I will disclaim by saying that I was a trained professional. Do not approach or interact with bears if you can help it. Before you go into bear country get trained. What follows is NOT a substitution for actual training and experience. Behavior and context is everything with bears. They have a lot of body language that communicates what they're feeling. While in general, grizz are more dangerous (they're more likely to hunt and less likely to scare off), if a bear seems really stressed and agitated, it is defensive. Get your deterrent (spray) ready, speak calmly and leave the way you came. Do not run. Ever. If contact is imminent, drop your belly to the ground, cover your head and neck, and do not let the bear flip you over. It will hopefully bat you around a bit then leave. In an ideal situation the bear will leave the area, then you can leave. On the other hand, if the bear seems playful or curious and keeps following you, ears up and forward, it's possible it's hunting. Get your deterrent ready, get as big and loud and aggressive as you can so it knows it will have to fight. Group together with others and back away to safety. Obviously none of that is a guarantee. Stay safe in the bush, y'all"
What about Koala Bears?
They are all stoned af and slow moving. You'll do Allright in a fight
What about panda bear?
Only be scared if you interrupt their theeesomes
Honestly, it seems like the guys mistake in the video (well, biggest mistake) was opening the gate and standing so close to the bear's avenue of escape with his arm out. Do you think he avoids getting swiped at, if he just opens the gate and backs away?
Good point. That stood out to me too. Intention was very unclear there. Pointing doesn't really seem to work with most if not all animals. It's not a regular sign unless drilled into them. It's probably more like flashing a weapon in this case (and our hands are indeed weapons of a sort) He did interestingly well otherwise. (My opinion is Yes to your Q, but no bear professional)
The size difference of those two bears says it all
And if it’s white, say good night.
Just a love tap.
The guy stood his ground and remained calm, [which is the best response in that situation for these bears](https://www.nps.gov/articles/bearattacks.htm). If he had responded differently or reacted to the swipe, it would have gone poorly for him
I don't think alcohol was involved in this situation.
Bear looked pretty sober to me.
The way he stumbled out of there and took a swipe at the bouncer? No way.
Random thought: If bears could drink, then i think they would drink mead.
Bears can drink… Look up wojtek the bear. Dude loved his beer.
Alright joke time: So a bear walks into a bar in Billings Montana. The bear (a he) walks up to bar, sits down and says "bar keep! one beer please!" The bar keep walks over and says "Sorry but we don't sell beer, to bears, in bars, in Billings." The bear fucking loses it. "What do you mean you don't sell beer to bears in bars in Billings?!" The bar keep remains solid "Sorry but we don't sell beer to bears in bars in Billings." After some back and forth the bear tells the bar keep: "Listen, if you don't serve me a beer.. You see that lady down there? I'm going to eat her." Bar keep: "Sorry, we don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings" The bear walks promptly to the end of the bar and eats the lady up and walks back to the bar keep. "Give me a beer." Bar keep: "Sorry we don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings, and on drugs" The bear puzzled says "on drugs?! I dont do drugs I just want a beer!" The bar keep: "That lady you just ate down there.. That was a barbiturate.
When I was 10, I heard my dad tell that punchline. I didn't hear the joke though. Thank you! A 40 year old mystery has been put to rest.
...I don't get it.
Bar bitch you ate*
Funny urban legend: back in the nineties a bunch of kids went out for a camping trip by lake chelan and brought a few cases of beer. While they were out swimming, a bear got into their camp, trashed the place ate most of the food and had bitten into and drank two cases of ranier beer. The cases of pbr were mostly untouched except for a can that was bitten but was still half full. The rangers eventually found the bear lounging drunk in a tree. After some prodding, they’d managed to lure the bear out of the tree with a can of ranier.
The bear not touching the PBR again after the initial taste is on-point.
Dude was lit like a Christmas tree light. He got way too political when the bear in the woods argument came up. It was totally uncalled for. Bear needed to go hibernate those 40 oz bottles off.
[удалено]
Goddamn! Got me again!!
FUCK!!!
every time I let my guard down, he comes back. how does this keep happening
that was a smooth transition, very nice.
Me: "wait, 19? Okay 19 point ANYTHING for blood alcohol content would kill a-aaaawwwww FUCKER!"
The morph, the myth, the legend
Wow, been a while since I saw one of these in the wild.
Holy Shit, just got caught by a fresh shitty morph.
Damn a fresh shittymorph. Got me good!!!
[удалено]
I would not be surprised if Shittymorph has it set up where they get emails from Google about how many times they are mentioned per day. Enough mentions after a certain period of time and BOOM.
![gif](giphy|1236TCtX5dsGEo)
Every. Single. Time.
Shine on you crazy diamond.
As somebody who don’t know shit about bears or wildlife outside of watching natgeo but has a healthy respect, I am going to agree with this 💪🏽.
Whoa, only 22 minutes old! Lmao love it, please never stop
Oh shit
You bastard
I can't believe I fell for it again. I'm too old to be this stupid.
Man good to see this account again, feel like it's been a few years since I've seen it.
Nah man, the humans are sober. The Bear is drunk af.
And on coke
LOL
Bears never look sober
It certainly was sobearing
Nah the bear was actually getting to rowdy and had to be kicked out the party and sent home.
And definitely not cocaine
100 for sure that guy was loaded with liquid courage in that moment
Too stupid to die. He's lucky he wasn't alone lol
I’m glad he’s okay. But still. It’s not like that fucking bear understood the man’s intentions. These animals don’t make fucking deals with us, nor do they negotiate. The bear simply assessed and with instinct decided it wasn’t worth figuring out this motherfucker or what he was about. Instead he decided to just move on to the garbage cans. He just as easily could have stood up and swiped his face off in front of all his friends.
In a sense though, the guy did exactly what needed to be done. Animals are constantly running threat vs. reward calculations. Right now, he's surrounded by a herd of apes. The apes do not appear particularly threatenting. If all the apes scatter, this implies they are no threat. If a leader advances threateningly, then I must leave or they will attack me collectively. This is how many social animals work. If the man had attacked, the bear would have shredded him. But he basically just said, "Our territory, you have to leave" and the bear left because whatever food he wanted didn't seem worth it to have a bunch of drunk apes attacking him.
He definitely didn't do the right thing. The right thing to do is to be loud, aggressive, and encourage the bear to move in a certain direction WITHOUT getting within swiping distance. Even though the guy was an idiot who deliberately walked up to a bear and stood close enough for it to hit him, the fact that it struck at him and made contact means that it's much more likely to be euthanized.
Hey now. He told the bear “No!” And waggled his finger in the bears face. That always works on bears and toddlers. 100% guaranteed
Actually only about 50% of bears are fluent in English and human body language.
He’s incredibly lucky he didn’t meet one of the Spanish speaking bears.
Yeah, that is true. He let himself get between the bear and the fenceline and didn't pay enough attention to his position
Then instantly turns his back as well just they cherry on top
a few hours later and a hungryer bear would have made a totally different risk assessement of the scene. ''imma eat the fat one''
I mean with alcohol in your system you can do anything.
Might get this tattooed on my chest, not sure yet tho
Maybe you need more alcohol in your system.
I’m on it!
Have a few drinks to help decide.
Bear was like dont rush me, bitch! I’m leaving! lmao
I think the Bear was like “you first” He was following the guy the whole time
Lol I was thinking the same shit. "And since you wanna rush me, here take that". 🐾
“…I don’t like you. Ok bye.”
that slash hurt him for sure
He's honestly lucky. That was just the bear testing him and "barely" even touched the surface of what it could have really done with a slightly harder swipe.
> That was just the bear testing him yup, and when you don't run that gets the bear a little scared about how badly that fight could go. We look huge to him considering we are standing upright all the time, not just when we stop.
For black bears fhis is the way, get big and get loud and dominate. This dude just had the im the boss attitude about him that the bear picked up on. Now any other color bear and this would have ended very diffrently.
Note: brown bears are not always brown, black bears are not always black. Unless you 100% know what kind of bear you are dealing with you should always assume it could turn and attack you. If you're camping in a new area always do research on what's around.
This looks like a neighborhood in Tennessee where the residents are well aquainted. Never show a predator your back though.
Imagine if it were a pink bear
Fry his god damned brains out with that rainbow beam they can shoot from their bellies.
Coincidentally the color a polar bear gets after devouring a couple of seals and a whale.
My grandfather used to have local bear family knock on his sliding glass door and he would feed them. If they became a little too friendly while we were outside he would follow them off the property while banging pots and pans. Allowing a bear to be that close and behind you is stupid regardless of how much you know them.
Honestly your grandfather making a habit of feeding bears was pretty goddamn stupid.
When the booze wears off he’ll definitely feel it
The trick is to never let the booze wear off.
That’s when the fever sets in
Could have EASILY had his guts for garters if the bear decided they wanted that. I have seen them open the side of a metal garbage can with their claws like it was tinfoil. Guy is very lucky.
its wild how much damage he did with such a half hearted "swipe" if you could even call it that... fuck man, we're nothing to nature.
It definitely looked like those scratches were starting to BLEED as the video cut off.
Seriously. We need bear proof clothing.
This is exactly what struck me. The bear showed the slightest amount of aggression and the man was left with red claw marks on his plump abdomen. He was grinning, but I think I saw behind his eyes the realization of how lucky he was.
I can't believe I didn't see anyone mention the big TV just resting on some logs on a tree.
the man escorting a 400lb bear was pretty captivating
Yeah, what the hell is that about.
They probably brought it out for the party
r/TVTooFar
Dude was quick with that chickenwire gate once the bear was out
He had such confidence in it.
Hahahahaha
" It bear-ly got you".
Came looking for this one lol
Videos like this always remind me how similar we are to primates. The way the people go in closer then kinda scramble back, the unsure looking around, everyone yelling while watching the one monkey doing something dangerous. It all looks like the videos I’ve seen of monkeys and apes messing around with a snake or something, only it’s a bear and the monkeys are pale and hairless
We are primates
That's why I assumed the commenter was a bear! "...how similar we [bears] are to primates [humans and the rest]..."
All you gotta do is watch people rioting over something or celebrating en mass after a sports event and it's extremely evident that we're cousins of apes.
> Videos like this always remind me how similar we are to primates I got some news for you
Spot on assessment.
> how similar we are to primates. We aren't similar to primates; we ***are*** primates.
Bear barely pawed him, and look at the claw streaks wow
10/10 for the bouncer/bear wrangler While needlessly idiotic, he does have a hell of a story to tell for the rest of his life and there is proof.
The rest of his life - "Yeah, I'm basically the Revenant \*buurrp*"
Brown = lay down Black = fight back White = you’re fucked So not nearly idiotic
Black & white = have an epic kung-fu fight.
This is how I'll tell it from now on 😂😂😂
White = goodnight
It’s “black, fight back.” Not “black, walk calmly up to them, don’t make yourself bigger or present yourself as a threat in anyway, and turn your back to the bear multiple times.”
That's a whimsically half serious bit of advice for what to do *if a bear attacks you*, not what to do if you stumble into one.
if he were a polar bear i bet they would have let him stay.
Polar bear would be the party magician. For my next trick I shall turn you all into my poo.
If it’s black, smack back If it’s brown, lie down If it’s white, say goodnight And if it’s black and white, then # Kung-Fu Fight!!!
Pretty sure a polar bear would be the one escorting them to the exit.
Personally escorting them to heaven.
Thank god there’s a strong gate on that 2 foot fence to ensure that he won’t be back for Mike’s picnic basket
If that guy would have showed any sign of fear during the stare down at the end, he would have been a gonner! His drunkenness might literally have saved his life.
I feel validated for my choices now.
I might follow Mike into the fires of Mordor
I'm gonna walk with this dude. He looks cool. He's smoking a cigar. He'll point me to the hot dogs. WTF dude? Are you kicking me out? I thought we were buddies. Bitch where the hot dogs at!? Nah, screw these drunk humans, I'll go get myself some trash buffet.
r/WhyWomenLiveLonger
The women are choosing the bear
The bear was asked to leave and did… a lot of guys can’t even manage that.
I never mix my beers with my bears.
That was not a small bear. Pretty sure it was the stench of the cigar that ran him off.
That's my thought. Lots of alcohol smell and cigar smoke making everything smell like shit to that bear luckily
Especially when that dude shat his pants after the swipe.
My first thought was “that’s a big ass black bear”
Isn‘t there a saying if the bear is black you need to fight back? I always thought black bears would be more easily scared
Black bears are usually pretty timid, especially with loud noises. If you bang pots and pans they will probably take off. I've been around plenty and they bolt when you shout This bear is fat AF and has probably spent a ton of time around human populated areas stealing food and stuff. Not as timid, but I think it would have run if they started shouting and looking big. But it also could have been spooked into attacking if it felt trapped, so all in all this worked out okay
To be fair, that saying is only applicable when you’re actively being attacked. If you’re simply in the presence of a bear, it’s different. There are lots of conflicting answers whenever you look up advice for how to deal with a bear encounter. But in general, best practice is to not act like prey (don’t run away, don’t turn you back), to huddle together if you have people with you, and to make yourself as unappealing as possible. You want the bear to think “ugh, I don’t wanna deal with that”. They’re generally not going to attack someone who seems bigger, harder to take down, etc. I would never recommend physically touching or fighting a black bear unless it’s already trying to maul you. Just stay back, make yourself look bigger, and sometimes excessive noise will get them to leave.
I grew up in Northern BC where black bears are so common that this situation occurs all the time. Lots of guys would just yell at black bears to fuck off and they usually would. They are more seen as a pest animal with capacity to be dangerous rather than a dangerous predator. I was shocked when I moved to the city and they will cancel whole events if a black bear is spotted in the area.
The man did run his risk... and the bear left him a tiny memory.
"mike..yea. that guy drinks too much"
I'LL TELL YOU WHEN I'VE HAD ENOUGH DAMMIT
Why did this guy kick Mike out of the party?
Poor bear, he just wanted to party
Make this man an honorary Australian immediately
Now listen to it again but pretend Mike is the bear’s name.
I like how they just treated that bear like a normal person and were like hey you were not invited go home.
That swipe was 100% just so the bear could tell his friends that he fought for the food but lost honorably.
He "bearly" got you buddy