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jonawesome

Important reminder that Corn Pop turned out to be real. As someone who was opposed to Biden at that point in the primary, I have perhaps never been more owned.


Prowindowlicker

Wait for reals? Corn Pop is an actual dude?!


jonawesome

[We live in a world of miracle and wonder ](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/there-really-was-a-corn-pop--but-critics-cast-doubt-on-joe-bidens-oft-told-story/2019/09/16/227115c8-d8ac-11e9-ac63-3016711543fe_story.html)


mdbforch

As an aside, I love how many things Delaware has named after Biden lol. Biden Welcome Center, Biden Train Station, Biden Aquatic Center...


SLCer

Scranton named its expressway after Biden lol


waupli

He probably hates that because it isn’t a train! Unless it’s fun to drive corvettes on I suppose. He’s such a badass hahaha


HikeRobCT

Just drove through there the other day. Big sign across the southbound lanes. It must totally melt the brains of the NEPA magats, and I love it!


ArmAromatic6461

I was at the Biden Welcome Center on Thursday. TBH it’s a GOATed rest area. Free massage chairs. Lots of food options. Well-maintained rest rooms. Great Starbucks.


mdbforch

I usually stop there on my way from NC and Mass and it is a spectacular rest station. Maryland House and the Biden WC are ridiculously GOATed, and the NJT/GSP rest areas would do well to learn from their example.


TheOnlyFallenCookie

Cho cho


ZanyZeke

What a legendary enemies-to-friends arc. They should make a movie about this


acbadger54

Eh I'm waiting for the manga adaptation


TeddyRoo_v_Gods

I’ll wait for hentai version.


vy2005

That article is framed with a fair amount of skepticism but it seems like basically everything is either true or people didn’t specifically recall. Makes Biden sound like the man lol


TheRnegade

Yeah, I'm willing to give Biden the benefit of the doubt. Just the other day, I was reminiscing with a friend on this double date we both went on back in 2011. He did not remember the date at all. For him, it was one of many dates. But, for me, it was my first one since moving to Utah and notable because my date specifically did not want to sit next to me. Which, looking back, was foreshadowing to how Mormons would keep me at arms length throughout my years in the state. So, short of me imagining the whole event, it's not surprising that Biden remembers a story that meant a lot of him while other people in that story are like "Uh, sure? I guess it happened."


acbadger54

NO FUCKING WAY


nevertulsi

Why are people so surprised? The name Is a bit goofy but idk it's not shocking. Dunno why so many assume it wasn't real


Delareh_

Fr have you seen names of street gangs and gang members?


KeithClossOfficial

Biden: “I got in a fight with some dude in the 60s but we resolved it amicably” Right wing: “get a load of this guy, amirite?”


Steak_Knight

🌎🧑‍🚀🔫👨‍🚀 Always has been.


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Steak_Knight

https://preview.redd.it/y38nu9pg55xc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4258a99f2d2bab19aa124880519d2b401b758f7a Last thing he saw


vanrough

ig he was too nice to use a chain that day


say592

Why does McConnell's expression look like an 11 year old boy seeing a pair of boobs for the first time?


_chungdylan

Of course he was


Noiserawker

Yep, I mean nicknames were different way back then, being called corn pop then is like being called Killer Mike or Ghost Face Killa now.


LittleSister_9982

Yeah, at that point I pretty much gave up. And I supported him in the primary, mind, I just figured they were standard Old Man Stories, but haha NOPE. Me now: "Yeah, his uncle probably got eaten. Wonder how he tasted."


Noiserawker

That story is nuts but also most likely true. He never said his uncle definitely got eaten, just that he crashed in an area where others got eaten and he likely did too.


Steak_Knight

https://preview.redd.it/b79m3o2be4xc1.jpeg?width=978&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=80b4fa90e7b1fd0730f67e27f87f445f9601dbdb


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Khar-Selim

he looks like he's done waiting


FreakinGeese

Obamna said he’d be done in just a minute but that was ten minutes ago 😤


TheRnegade

He also said last Tuesday at 3:34pm that they would get ice-cream right after catch.


BasedGodStruggling

In regular conversation I always call him Obamna lmao


BattleFleetUrvan

We can’t trust a man who lies about his football stats from 60 years ago.


Diner_Lobster_

He’s just appealing to the “Diner in Ohio” crowd who totally could’ve gone pro if not for his bum knee


Steak_Knight

Joseph Robinette “Speedhawk” Biden, Jr.


Zero-Follow-Through

[He gets 1 out of 3 votes per Ohio diner he visits](https://media-cldnry.s-nbcnews.com/image/upload/t_nbcnews-fp-1200-630,f_auto,q_auto:best/MSNBC/Components/Video/__NEW/n_wag_5what_120910.jpg) Which ain't that bad overall.


recursion8

Reminds me of [this](https://www.miamiherald.com/latest-news/il47u4/picture266923026/alternates/LANDSCAPE_1140/AP22278716941078.jpg) Fuckin gigachad


J3553G

Lol, go stand in the corner desantis. You know what you did.


Andy_B_Goode

I bet I could throw a football over them mountains, Jack


Zepcleanerfan

Chad Brandon


Steak_Knight

Go long, fat


Senior_Ad_7640

Uncle Rico is an important voting bloc.


Kaptain_Skurvy

The only man we can trust is one lying about his financials currently.


WHOA_27_23

Runner-up vs. 5th place, what a gotcha


isummonyouhere

he was probably saying “a” runner up which isn’t even wrong


ThePevster

Is the guy in last place a runner up too?


Zerce

Yes. Runner-up refers to second place when unspecified, but can also refer to any position behind first when specified. You can be last runner up.


SeniorWilson44

He never had the makings of a varsity athlete.


Steak_Knight

Small hands, that was his problem


MonkMajor5224

Wilmington, that place is Scranton with clams


nakedpilsna

Four touchdowns in one game, Peg.


ObeseBumblebee

Do you think he could have thrown a football over them mountains?


SerialStateLineXer

He also [lied extensively](https://www.politifact.com/article/2020/may/07/ad-watch-fact-checking-video-about-bidens-academic/) about his academic record. He also promoted a [conspiracy theory](https://www.politifact.com/factchecks/2024/jan/26/joe-biden/president-joe-biden-distorts-income-tax-rates-for/) about billionaires paying an average 8% tax rate; not only did he lie, but he wasted taxpayer money commissioning a rigged study to support the lie. The guy's a terrible President and a crappy human being. You don't need to simp so hard for him. It's enough to say that he's bad, but not as bad as Trump.


Iron-Fist

>8% No lie there, the report he's referencing explains the number very, very clearly. The 8% is if you include untaxed capital gains, which is a fair comparison in most circumstances. They get the equivalent of money, which for a worker would be considered income whether it was cash or any other type of vehicle, and as long as they don't change their cost basis they don't have to pay taxes on it. They still own it, can still borrow against it, can still give it to people or put it in trusts, in every way unrealized gains are money in the bank except for not paying taxes on it. The equivalent for workers would be not paying real estate tax until you sell your house, or never if you simply don't sell it.


looktowindward

He was a lifeguard for several summers at an inner city pool. Chances are he dragged plenty of people out before they got in trouble. Not all of us get private swim lessons, RNC


CletusVonIvermectin

I worked at a summer camp on a lake in college. Our lifeguards would average one save a week, each. Swimming is surprisingly hazardous.


Steak_Knight

Also had to deal with Corn Pop, who was by all accounts a bad dude


ElGosso

Don't you mean "Esther?"


ductulator96

I was a lifeguard in high school and we probably averaged a save every other day.


Popular-Swordfish559

the Boy Scouts publishes a magazine called Scout Life for its members, and each edition includes three little comic-book style stories of scouts who have saved lives and earned the Honor Medal. They are **all** aquatic rescues, and of those aquatic rescues, they are overwhelmingly rip current rescues. Be safe in the water, and know how to handle rips.


waupli

That’s crazy. I was a lifeguard/swim teacher for a couple years at summer camp and we never had any “actual” saves. I guess to be fair we had like 8 lifeguards in the pool at any one time with one always in the chair overseeing, and I had daily incidents when I had to chase and pull kids back from the deep end before they got in actual trouble. I would turn around for literally 30 seconds to help one kid in my group and another would be halfway to the deep end when I turned around…


CletusVonIvermectin

Biggest issue was the lake was very cold. Kids would jump in and have a cold shock response where it kinda feels like you're suffocating. Maybe inhale some water or just have a panic attack and forget how to swim. Also the campers were middle school boys so occasionally they would try to drown each other for fun.


waupli

Yeah cold shock is very serious. People always assume water is warm when it is warm outside, which isn’t reliable. Deep water stays cold.


Spirit_jitser

Were they in trouble, or, considering how young joe biden looked, [was it like that one scene from sandlot?](https://youtu.be/H_yAOI6FLqk)


clubfoot55

Not saying Biden's experience is false but personally I worked as a lifeguard for 4 years and never once had to get in the water


looktowindward

Did you work at a busy inner-city pool with a large population of non-swimmers? I have worked as a lifeguard as a pool that did swim checks - ZERO rescues. I've also been to public pools with no swim checks and seen quite a few.


this_very_table

What was the racial makeup of the pool you lifeguarded? Biden was working at a pool where most of the swimmers were black, and even today [black kids are 6 times more likely to drown than white kids.](https://blavity.com/black-people-swimming-history/)


ultimate_shill

I worked two seasons (really half seasons each) and made 2 saves and was present for probably half a dozen more not including land emergencies (worst was a toddler choking on the deck). Extending that, Biden's story adds up in my view


Deep-Coffee-0

Surely you had to fish a turd out at least once in four years


clubfoot55

Just my own


DadJokeBadJoke

Nevermind, it's a Baby Ruth.


Cowguypig2

My Mom did lifeguarding all through high school and college, and I believe she said she only had to once.


murphysclaw1

lazy mf


WHOA_27_23

I was there, I'm cornpop.


Nerdybeast

I also lifeguarded and had two that I recall, maybe three but not positive. I'd believe it, probably wildly depends on the pool


[deleted]

Biden had the elevators in his buildings have fake floor numbers so people would think they were higher than they were. Biden routinely cheats at golf and always makes sure he wins the annual trophy at his own club through cheating Biden cheated on all his wives, including on his most recent wife with a porn star.


SLCer

Biden lied about his building being the tallest in Manhattan when the WTC collapsed.


ballmermurland

That's still, to this day, the most unhinged thing Trump has ever said. I know it's a heroic competition, but calling into live television when everyone is watching in horror and cheerily saying you now have the tallest building is just PEAK Trump. Doesn't get any higher than that.


creaturefeature16

He's been showing us from day one who he is.


Cleverdawny1

Hey, secret service man, thank you for your service to this government! Have some groupie pics I keep getting 😎


Baron_Flatline

I want the deep lore of a 70s Biden fangirl being redirected to a Secret Service agent and then they fall in love and get married. Romance writers, WYA?


TheOnlyFallenCookie

Wasn't Biden back then the youngest senator?


DadJokeBadJoke

IIRC, he ran while he was still too young to be sworn in. He has to wait until his birthday after getting elected to be sworn in.


improbablywronghere

ChatGPT gave me this: Title: **Love in the Line of Duty** In the bustling political landscape of 1975 Washington D.C., young Secret Service agent Jack Marshall is assigned to a unique, if not slightly unconventional, task. President Biden, then a charismatic senator, receives a series of enchanting and rather daring letters and photographs from a mysterious woman named Evelyn Hart. With discretion and privacy paramount, Jack is tasked with ensuring these communications are handled properly. Jack, diligent and focused on his career, initially sees this assignment as just another part of his duties. However, as he reads through Evelyn's letters to ensure no security threats, he becomes captivated by her words—her passion for life, her insightful thoughts on politics, and her subtle wit. Each letter reveals more of Evelyn's vibrant personality, and Jack finds himself looking forward to each new correspondence with increasing anticipation. Driven by curiosity and an emerging sense of connection, Jack decides to reach out to Evelyn under the guise of ensuring her correspondence doesn't pose a security risk. They meet in a quaint café, under the blooming cherry blossoms of D.C., and the connection is instantaneous. Evelyn, a spirited art historian with a love for American history, is equally intrigued by Jack's solemn dedication and the surprising sensitivity he shows during their conversations. Their meetings become more frequent and soon evolve into deep, meaningful dates where they share their dreams, fears, and hopes. However, their budding romance is not without its challenges. The nature of Jack's job means he cannot share much about his work, and Evelyn struggles with the shadows his profession casts over their relationship. The climax arrives when Jack's duty calls him away at a crucial moment—the opening night of Evelyn's first major exhibition at a prestigious art gallery. Torn between his duty and his heart, Jack makes a dramatic decision that could jeopardize his career but proves his commitment to Evelyn. In true rom-com fashion, Jack arrives in the nick of time, blending into the crowd just as Evelyn, thinking she's been stood up, starts her speech. Mid-sentence, she spots him. Her words falter, her eyes light up, and the crowd watches as Jack walks up to her, apologizing profusely. In front of friends, art enthusiasts, and bewildered colleagues, Jack proposes. Fast forward to a cozy epilogue: Jack and Evelyn are happily married, navigating the challenges of his secretive job and her burgeoning art career together. Their home is filled with laughter, love, and countless photographs—only now, they are of their adventures together.


PoliticaLens

I unironically love that it fleshed it out this much


improbablywronghere

It's extremely capable i use it for all kind of stuff working (software engineer) or just dicking around. I think a lot of people just hear about AI on the news and podcasts and stuff and sleep on its actual real capabilities and that you can use it right now.


PoliticaLens

Oh I know, I use ChatGPT for a lot of things, especially compiling data. But typically when I've messed around with it asking it to make up stories, they always kind of have the same feel to them. This time though, there was definitely something there, I could *feel* it


dougmc

That's ... *amazing*.


atomic-knowledge

You may or may not have just inspired a subplot


Daniel_B_plus

Played college ball, you know!


thats_good_bass

At some cushy Ivy League school!


Telperions-Relative

Try University of Texas!


MolybdenumIsMoney

University of Delaware*


ductulator96

Joe Flacco 🤝 Joe Biden


thats_good_bass

Shoulda edited it to fit with Biden’s actual history smh


Telperions-Relative

Dammit 😔


MulfordnSons

doesn’t have the makings of a varsity athlete


No-Cherry-3959

I mean, the image in the post basically confirms the part that women would send him pictures. The Dark Lord was a hottie in his day.


TorkBombs

But that hair was mostly gone by the time he got to the senate. Hmmm


acbadger54

But that Implies he isn't hot now smh


carlitospig

Can confirm. Would totally send nudie pics. Oh wait, I just did anyway. You’re welcome, Secret Service. 😎


CheetoMussolini

Old man slightly exaggerates his glory days, more at 11


AlloftheEethp

As someone who played high school sports in the late 2000s, it’s worth noting that it was impossible for us to check our stats until like my senior year of high school. It seems like he was very good and probably believed what he said.


CheetoMussolini

Hell even if he knew he was exaggerating slightly, he was still top five in the whole damn state! It's relatable and charming for someone to exaggerate harmlessly like that. I don't plenty of old men who do it, and you almost can't help but love them a little for it.


Yttlion

Yeah I like how they wanna pretend like he massively exaggerated, brother was better than most players at his level, he maybe not runner up, but was probably one good week from being there.


KeithClossOfficial

Says a lot about him this is the “worst” they can find on him


CheetoMussolini

Meanwhile prominent Republicans are literally bragging about murdering puppies. We have old timer exaggerates his achievements (which were actually pretty fucking impressive; 5th in the state means he was very talented!) vs. puppy murdering fascists who want to end US democracy And yet it's still going to be a close election Sigh


djm07231

It is pretty interesting that Biden didn’t really have a leftist/hippy period in his youth. Bill Clinton protested against the Vietnam War and expressed his opposition in the ROTC letter. Obama took drugs during his high school years was an activist against South Africa regime as well as working as a community organizer in Chicago. These kinds of tidbits are like catnip for conservative media to indulge in their fantasies but Biden is really boring in that regard. He didn’t really oppose or protest the Vietnam while he was young and was pretty detached from the leftist/hippy movement of the time.


kaiclc

Didn't Obama say/write something along the lines of his pretending to be a leftie in college to pick up girls?


Chillbrosaurus_Rex

[https://lithub.com/even-president-obama-once-used-books-to-pick-up-girls/](https://lithub.com/even-president-obama-once-used-books-to-pick-up-girls/)


__JimmyC__

>Looking back, it’s embarrassing to recognize the degree to which my intellectual curiosity those first two years of college paralleled the interests of various women I was attempting to get to know: Marx and Marcuse so I had something to say to the long-legged socialist who lived in my dorm; Fanon and Gwendolyn Brooks for the smooth-skinned sociology major who never gave me a second look; Foucault and Woolf for the ethereal bisexual who wore mostly black. As a strategy for picking up girls, my pseudo-intellectualism proved mostly worthless; I found myself in a series of affectionate but chaste friendships. tfw no ethereal bisexual goth gf.


Teacat1995

holy shit hes just like me


MontanaWildhack69

I read all this Mont Pelerin shit to get in good with the neolib chicks only to find that all the neolib chicks are divorced middle-aged men :(


Zrk2

On the bright side - now you can leave them too!


BattleFleetUrvan

Sigma grindset


tangowolf22

Damn he’s literally me


MolybdenumIsMoney

He campaigned against Vietnam in his 1972 Senate election and made it a big campaign issue. The biggest difference between him and someone like Bill Clinton is that Biden is 4 years older and wasn't a college student at the time. He was already running for elected office by 1970 (as New Castle County Councilor)


SLCer

Biden was a frat boy jock so not surprised he wasn't a hippie, though he did oppose the Vietnam War when he ran for the senate in 1972.


Noiserawker

He's having that phase now.


towngrizzlytown

Woah, Biden was hot. I had absolutely no idea. Aging is a terrible thing.


LordBadgerIII

I mean the guy still looks pretty good for his age tbh


GenerousPot

🥴


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GenerousPot

Oh I don't disagree I'm just conveying he makes me horny  send


Yttlion

Bidensexual, I've never been more attracted to a 80 year old man.


Noiserawker

Most people his age aren't above ground, guy is automatically killing it in aging department.


HHHogana

Yeah, iirc he was already balding when he went to congress at 29 years old. Still he ended up aged good. Not as good as top tier never aging people like Ernie Hudson, but good.


Xellirks

Balding at 25 gang If Biden grew up in the Rogaine era he'd be a supermodel, not president


SLCer

Biden famously got plugs in the 1980s or 90s. It was often joked about. But his hair looks good now considering he's old as fuck.


Xellirks

There's a reason he came out for gay marriage early, we were his most loyal fans already


vi_sucks

Plus, have you seen the size of his kid's dong? Pretty good odds the apple didn't fall far from the tree.


Significant-Gas3046

It's always the thin guys


HotTakesBeyond

It runs in the family, fat 🍦 😎


Cromasters

Maybe it's like hair loss though. We'll need to know about his maternal grandfather's pants situation.


Noiserawker

The tree didn't fall far from the tree in this case


Steak_Knight

He could easily fix it https://preview.redd.it/y1j3yzaip4xc1.jpeg?width=1024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4a543042592b15092e28992c64c2427e5cc0f5a9


All_Work_All_Play

I... Fuckin what. 


Steak_Knight

Yeah you do.


Significant-Gas3046

PILF


West-Code4642

wat a baddie


Sh1nyPr4wn

I see why tiktokers are so scared of aging now Brb, I gotta go grab some "anti-aging straws"(this is a real thing)


Weirdyxxy

It sounds like something people might be grasping for


Strength-Certain

Look, Fats, I'm not saying I play Wingman for the Secret Service, but I play Wingman for the Secret Service.


ElGosso

I don't care if these are real or not - it would be funnier if they were, so I choose to believe that they are.


senoricceman

These assholes are literally running the biggest liar in American presidential history for president and they have the gall to post crap like this. 


9c6

Imagine seriously fact checking Biden as a conservative, after trump Like at that point you've completely admitted reality and facts don't matter and all you care about are feelings


TheRnegade

I'm fine with fact checking but if this is coming up and that's all you have, it would definitely lead me to wonder "Wait, maybe I'm voting for the wrong guy?" Because, comparing the two it's...I mean, one is "yeah, this old guy might be misremembering or embellishing" and the other is just "ok, time to put grandpa in a home because he's ill."


pseudoanon

Joe shared nudes without consent? Breaks my heart.


aclart

Unsolicited ones. So he was sharing information about abusers with law enforcement.


FourthLife

I think if someone sends you completely unsolicited nudes they don’t have a right to privacy for them. Otherwise women would have to take those unsolicited dick pics to the grave rather than making fun of them


2112moyboi

Based


jon_hawk

Women?!?! Mr. President, that’s someone’s great grandmother you’re talking about! Show some respect


gritsal

Joe Biden alpha male lmao


PrincessofAldia

Damn young Joe Biden looked good


acbadger54

The fact it's the party of Trump saying this makes it so funny


Impressive_Cream_967

God he looked so good. WHat's that hairstyle called?


try_to_be_nice_ok

Damn, young Biden was a stud.


Successful_Raisin665

The AI upscaled version of this pic is weird lol


TonyG_from_NYC

RNC jelly Biden was a thirst trap back in the day.


Weirdyxxy

"Mr. President, could you please tell us if you got any salacious pictures? I need it for... Research"


MsSeraphim

RNC research pretty much says it all.