I get this so much. We just have to remind ourselves that, like you said, that version of them that we loved doesn’t exist anymore. It’s holding on to the past.
It’s not selfish. It’s very common, in fact. Our egos get bruised and so by wanting them to want us what we’re really seeking is validation. Something that, somehow, we already have the capability of giving ourselves.
That safety may not have been so safe if he was foolish enough to destroy it. And if it really felt that incredible, just think of how safe you’ll feel with the right person :)
Thank you for posing this question. It is so interesting reading people’s replies!
Here’s mine:
I want him to want me so I know I my love and his love was real.
I want him to want me so I know I’m worth it.
I want him to want me so that we can build a future together - the way we want.
I want him to want me so I know the pain was worth it.
I want him to want me so he will come back and see how hard I’ve worked to better myself.
I want him to want me because when he wants me, I feel secure.
I can relate 100%. Wanna beest yond f'r mine own ex girlfriend
***
^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.)
Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`
The thing is I don’t actually want them. I feel entitled to a version of them that does not exist. Its all within me.
I get this so much. We just have to remind ourselves that, like you said, that version of them that we loved doesn’t exist anymore. It’s holding on to the past.
Thanks, that's the bit that hurts like the past don't mean shit.
This is amazing thank you.
Love this. All your reasons are my reasons too. I’ll add one: I make his life better.
Too bad he’s gonna miss out on all the great things you’re going to do :)
Ummm I struggle with all of this it’s awful for me why ponder this shit when we can try to do something else instead of staying in misery?
Because it’s a good way of deciphering the situation and potentially moving on faster
Maybe
For me its very simple. I liked the person i was when i was with and arround her
You are that person already :)
[удалено]
It’s not selfish. It’s very common, in fact. Our egos get bruised and so by wanting them to want us what we’re really seeking is validation. Something that, somehow, we already have the capability of giving ourselves.
Why would you do this to her? It’s very hard to get someone to live you that much.
I just felt an incredible sense of safety with him.. that I have never found elsewhere. But he took pains to destroy that later.
That safety may not have been so safe if he was foolish enough to destroy it. And if it really felt that incredible, just think of how safe you’ll feel with the right person :)
Thank you. This really made me feel a bit better 🤗
Thank you for posing this question. It is so interesting reading people’s replies! Here’s mine: I want him to want me so I know I my love and his love was real. I want him to want me so I know I’m worth it. I want him to want me so that we can build a future together - the way we want. I want him to want me so I know the pain was worth it. I want him to want me so he will come back and see how hard I’ve worked to better myself. I want him to want me because when he wants me, I feel secure.
“I want him to want me because when he wants me, I feel secure.” There’s the root
Yeah, definitely. Codependency is not healthy
This wasn't love. Let him go and save you both the pain
I can relate 100%. Wanna be that for my ex girlfriend
I can relate 100%. Wanna beest yond f'r mine own ex girlfriend *** ^(I am a bot and I swapp'd some of thy words with Shakespeare words.) Commands: `!ShakespeareInsult`, `!fordo`, `!optout`