I am a high level cleric in one of my campaigns, and naturally out of the goodness of my heart I enjoy reuniting loved ones with each other, so I dug up the graveyard, snuck every corpse I could manage into the city and raised them so they could give one last hug to their loved ones.
One time I met some criminals in a village that wanted to fight me for some arbitrary reason, so after the fight we reconciled and I figured the village was in dire need of some love so with the aid of the only armed group there and a few other spells I made sure everyone got to experience a proper group hug around a growing bonfire in the middle of the village, man woman and child, none were left out. The heat of love was truly heart warming as I am sure the rest of my party could attest to when they got back.
In fact, that entire campaign has the party encountering a lot of cold people looking for a hug everywhere, but the party always avoids any fatal entanglements so it's aight.
Ok, in our defense, we really din't knew that putting two bags of holding inside eachother would create a nuclear explosion.
Now, i cannot justify what we did with this information.
Leia and Han when Han was being frozen in Empire Strikes Back. I didn't replace only one word in each quote, but at least I'm pretty sure I did the synonym part right.
Darth Plagueis was a baddie. So bulky and so nerdy, he could give birth. He was such a nerd on baddies that he could keep his lovers thriving. The team of baddies is a path that people find weird. He was so bulky, the only thing he feared was losing his bulkiness, which he did. Sadly, he taught his partner his nerdy ways, then his partner slayed him in bed. How scoff-able. He could stop other people from getting slayed, but not himself.
Well congraculacins
https://preview.redd.it/tiij50s027jc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a2d0eb4c4e31a1d6d57be9e0d32025af5dd381f
I have No fucking Idea what is the original quote.
You were the selected individual! It was declared that you would harm the Sith, not connect with them! Provide steadiness to the thrust! Not abandon it in the absence of light!
"May the stamina be with you."
"Do or do not. There is no endeavor."
"I am your daddy."
"General kenobi, you are a distinct one!"
"I've got an unwell feeling about this."
"Rey Airtreader."
"I am the statehouse."
"I am a jedi, like my daddy before me."
And my favorite, simply calling the franchise "intergalactic disputes"
Obi-Wan: You were the chosen one! It was said that you would defeat the Sith, not sympathize with them! Bring balance to the force, not leave it in dusk!
Anakin: I dislike you!
Obi-Wan: You were my friend, Anakin! I liked you!
"Begun, the Copy Squabble has."
"I find your lack of faith... uncomfortable."
"A while ago, in a Galaxy a bit further than just around the corner."
"The Force is Velaryon with this one."
"I've seen this undercooked strength once before. It didn't me spook me enough then. It does now."
"That's no moon - it's a volume station."
"He's more machine now than man - braided and evil."
"Now *this* is pod-whizzing!"
"I thought you said that Vader betrayed and group-of-crows'd my father."
"Last time we met, I was but the learner. Now I am the guru." "Only the guru of evil, Darth."
"Use the pressure-times-area, Luke".
Darth Vader is perpetually in right Black leather and is constantly in pain (by choice rather than getting a more comfortable suit).
Checks out. Guy is twisted and naughty 😉.
Darth Vader:
I've been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again, at last. The circle is now complete. When I left you I was but the learner. Now, I am much better.
Obi-Wan:
Only a better at naughtiness, Darth.
Darth Vader:
Your powers are only ok, pops.
Obi-Wan:
You can't win, Darth. If you knock me down, I shall become better than you can possibly imagine.
Darth Vader:
Maybe you should not have come back.
"You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and shenanigans"
This sounds like a game of dnd
To be fair, a lot of DND parties are basically war criminals.
It's only a war crime if the country still exists at the end of the campaign
More like Geneva Suggestions
Geneva Competition
Geneva checklist
the geneva schedule
Geneva itinerary
yes, master jedi. should we factor in command training for the child commanders for the slave army or let them wing it?
Also doesn't count if the party made the country. Being in charge rules. Also Kingmaker is great.
unless you make someone else king and they become threatened by you
I started a dnd campaign last week, we are already murdering children. All in all could be worse
I am a high level cleric in one of my campaigns, and naturally out of the goodness of my heart I enjoy reuniting loved ones with each other, so I dug up the graveyard, snuck every corpse I could manage into the city and raised them so they could give one last hug to their loved ones. One time I met some criminals in a village that wanted to fight me for some arbitrary reason, so after the fight we reconciled and I figured the village was in dire need of some love so with the aid of the only armed group there and a few other spells I made sure everyone got to experience a proper group hug around a growing bonfire in the middle of the village, man woman and child, none were left out. The heat of love was truly heart warming as I am sure the rest of my party could attest to when they got back. In fact, that entire campaign has the party encountering a lot of cold people looking for a hug everywhere, but the party always avoids any fatal entanglements so it's aight.
Ok, in our defense, we really din't knew that putting two bags of holding inside eachother would create a nuclear explosion. Now, i cannot justify what we did with this information.
He defecated through a sunroof!!
Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?
My friend group in a nutshell.
"I'm fond of you." "I'm aware."
Best one so far
This is Frasier and Lilith Crane.
inquiry about identity someone who adores you
Which one is this supposed to be ?
Leia and Han when Han was being frozen in Empire Strikes Back. I didn't replace only one word in each quote, but at least I'm pretty sure I did the synonym part right.
Anakin, senator Palpatine is MEAN! From my point of view, the Jedi are mean! Then you are a little bit turned around!
I DISAGREE WITH YOU
You were my acquaintance Anakin! I liked you!
You were supposed to help the good guys, not join the bad guys!
YOU MAKE ME MILDLY UNCONFORTABLE WITH YOUR PRESENCE
YOU INCONVENIENCE ME!
I dislike you!
I enjoyed your presence!
Anakin, Senator Palpatine is NAUGHTY! From my point of view, the Jedi are naughty! Then you are nowhere to be found!
From my point of view, the Jedi are average!
Anakin, senator Palpatine is RUDE!
Have you ever heard the whoopsie-daisy of Darth Plagueis the wise?
Darth Plagueis the Smarty-pants.
Darth Plagueis was a baddie. So bulky and so nerdy, he could give birth. He was such a nerd on baddies that he could keep his lovers thriving. The team of baddies is a path that people find weird. He was so bulky, the only thing he feared was losing his bulkiness, which he did. Sadly, he taught his partner his nerdy ways, then his partner slayed him in bed. How scoff-able. He could stop other people from getting slayed, but not himself.
“He was so bulky” 👏
This is hilarious
This made me laugh more than it should’ve. 🤣🤣
"It's a prank !"
Oh no
Well congraculacins https://preview.redd.it/tiij50s027jc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a2d0eb4c4e31a1d6d57be9e0d32025af5dd381f I have No fucking Idea what is the original quote.
O fuck i figured it Out its a trap
Bro has better character development than Rey
https://preview.redd.it/1ri4w160ibjc1.jpeg?width=226&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=158af8211be7f53a901d998841628e4b2e3461e8
its just a prank bro dont get mad
"Every single Jedi, including your friend Obi-Wan Kenobi, is now an ill-wisher of the Republic"
Very simple: "No, I am your Daddy"
yes please 🫣
No, no... that's improbable!
That’s… highly unlikely.
Look, if you’re not going to take this seriously, I’m out.
r/TheRealJoke
nuh uh
Tf you mean nuh uh?
Luke, I fucked your mom
I’ve got a regretful feeling about this.
That's honestly some Google translate energy.
Year 4 thesaurus users be like:
Im feeling slightly uneasy about this
It’s done, Anakin! I have the elevated terrain!
I have the intoxicated plateau!
I have the stoned floor!
You minify my power.
Do not attempt it
*attempts it*
You were the selected individual! It was declared that you would harm the Sith, not connect with them! Provide steadiness to the thrust! Not abandon it in the absence of light!
I DONT APPRECIATE YOUR EXISTENCE!!!
You were my male sibling, Anakin! I was fond of your existence!
My geography is you superior
Let's try twirling, that's a nice dodge.
...What is the original?
let’s try spinning, that’s a nice trick
Good trick*
mb thanks
I'm vaguely bothered by sand.
It‘s lumpy, scraggy, peeves and it gets all over
“Power!! Enough power!!”
Sufficient power? No such thing.
I love It. SUFFICIENT POWER! DISCRETE POWER!
"Energy!! All energy!!"
"Bottomless Power!!"
“I am the assembly!”
“I am the council!”
I like democracy
I enjoy the Republic
"At present, this statement holds untrue"
It's a seditious act then
I am the legislative assembly
-Hello far-off! -Nonexclusive Kenobi!
Mans said “nonexclusive Kenobi” 😭 nice twist
You are a thicc one
"But I was going into Tosche Station to pick up some power changers!"
You can waste time with your bros when your chores are done.
“*Alarm* leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.” When I hate getting up early.
Alarm leads to frustration, frustration leads to dislike, dislike leads to discomfort.
This is the path to the shady side.
Will the real Darth Shady, please stand up.
“You underestimate my energy!” “Judge me by my length, do you?”
Don't you mean "energy per unit time?"
It's a subterfuge!
Insubordinations are built on hope.
I find your lack of faith gloomy
Accomplish, or accomplish not. There is no attempt
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis The Clever?
That might be a moon.
That's no moon, it's a space facility.
You were my male sibling Anakin, I was fond of you!
You were my bro, Anakin! I liked you!
Somehow Palpatine came again
While watching his own granddaughter… disgusting
😂
Twice the pride, double the belly-flop.
That's me jumping off the Olympic high five
It's over Anakin, I have the Dominance!
I have the overpriced groud!
I have the inebriated ground.
I have the uplifted soil
*overpriced gourd
May the product of the mass and the acceleration be with you!
Mos Eisley spaceport. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and never-do-wells
You were correct. You were correct about me. Tell your sister… you were correct.
"May the stamina be with you." "Do or do not. There is no endeavor." "I am your daddy." "General kenobi, you are a distinct one!" "I've got an unwell feeling about this." "Rey Airtreader." "I am the statehouse." "I am a jedi, like my daddy before me." And my favorite, simply calling the franchise "intergalactic disputes"
It’s over Anakin, I have the elevation.
“At last we will show ourselves to the Jedi, at last we will have tit for tat” - Darth Mangle from Star Fights: The Ghost Danger
Ani? My goodness you've engorged
Ani? My deity! You're old!
They’re animals… and I slaughtered them like animals… I’M IFFY ON THEM!
Foton Conflict (Foton≈Star)
Space Kerfuffle 3: Retaliation of the Sith
Stellar Skirmish
Galactic Hostilities
It's life bubbles emitted by all living things. It covers us and penetrates us; it glues the galaxy together.
"It seems that in your anger, you killed her" "I.. I couldn't have, she was alive I felt it. REGREEEEEEEEEEETTTTTTTT!!!"
A lengthy time ago, in a space area a fair distance away.
This bounty hunter is my kind of hooligan. Plucky, and crafty.
Ok, I'll give it a shot. Ahem: YOU WERE THE SELECTED GUY!
The ability to speak does not make you smart brained.
What I told you was approximate, from a certain dot of sight.
You’ve rotated her against me
Obi-Wan: You were the chosen one! It was said that you would defeat the Sith, not sympathize with them! Bring balance to the force, not leave it in dusk! Anakin: I dislike you! Obi-Wan: You were my friend, Anakin! I liked you!
"Begun, the Copy Squabble has." "I find your lack of faith... uncomfortable." "A while ago, in a Galaxy a bit further than just around the corner." "The Force is Velaryon with this one." "I've seen this undercooked strength once before. It didn't me spook me enough then. It does now."
luke i am your daddy
Then I’ll see you in an uncomfortable place!!
Use the COERCE luke
I don’t like sand. It’s grainy and scabrous and vexatious… and it gets in all places.
Only siths deal in essentials!(some help from google 😅)
Now THIS is Huskwhizzing!
Hello somewhere
Hi there
Too smart for my primitive brain. I quit
Omg i knew the Disney writers were bad, but workshopping through Reddit is sad.
The catharsis is therapeutic.
If you're not with me, then you're not my friend.
“It’s over Anakin, I am elevated!” “You think too little of my electricity!”
Luke, use the ability!
"Luminous beings are we. Not this Boorish matter."
"That's no moon - it's a volume station." "He's more machine now than man - braided and evil." "Now *this* is pod-whizzing!" "I thought you said that Vader betrayed and group-of-crows'd my father." "Last time we met, I was but the learner. Now I am the guru." "Only the guru of evil, Darth." "Use the pressure-times-area, Luke".
Your lightsaber will make an adequate addition to my... collection.
The Force will be with you…sometimes. No, *I* am the husband of your mother. You don’t need to see our library card.
sometimes is not a synonym of always
So basically if star wars had chinese translated subtitles
“At last we will reveal ourselves to the Jedi. At last, we shall have tit-for-tat” - Darth Bash
I love you. I guess..
I DISLIKE YOUUUU!!!!
Somehow, Palpatine refunded.
Sith Lords are our hobby on the side.
Darth Vader is perpetually in right Black leather and is constantly in pain (by choice rather than getting a more comfortable suit). Checks out. Guy is twisted and naughty 😉.
Makes vader sound kinky
im on top of him (i have the high ground)
I do not prefer sand.
From my point of view, the Jedi are naughty 😈
I feel like Family Guy already won this game with "Don't get penis-y"
"Greetings" "Person in charge of a lot of people Kenobi" "It's a disagreement then"
You fought in the reproduce conflict?
Chewie...TAP IT!!!
"At last we will expose ourselves to the Jedi. At last we will have payback."
"You like me because I'm an unprincipled person . There aren't enough unprincipled persons in your life"
"Did you ever hear the sad story of Darth Plagueis the Smart?"
You're all alone son. Let's puff this thing and go home.
The word you are looking for is "euphemism"
Howdy there.
“I don’t like sand, it’s impolite and bumpy, and it gets around.”
Aren't you a little teeny weeny for a storm trooper?
"Hm. When five hundred years old *you* reach, look as fabulous you will not."
"I have a not so good emotion regarding the situation we're in"
Darth Vader: I've been waiting for you, Obi-Wan. We meet again, at last. The circle is now complete. When I left you I was but the learner. Now, I am much better. Obi-Wan: Only a better at naughtiness, Darth. Darth Vader: Your powers are only ok, pops. Obi-Wan: You can't win, Darth. If you knock me down, I shall become better than you can possibly imagine. Darth Vader: Maybe you should not have come back.
“Free Power” OR “Unlimited Ability”. - Palpatine sounds more eco-friendly than I remember!
I love representative government
Luke I am your sperm donor
There Is only the force, and i am it's controller
I unalived them all. Not just the men, but the women and the children too.
started, the clone tussles have
“I distrust sand”
I think we best get under a roof. The desert folk scare to death easily but they'll arrive again shortly after, and in sizable numbers
It’s ajourned anakin, my ground is over yours!